“I haven’t forgotten, but it’s the only way I know to accurately describe you.” Looking directly at her, he said, “I came in here for a reason. I wanted to apologize for something I said last year. That last night on the boat.”
Lauren shook her head. “Oh, Lasse, let it go.”
“I will after you hear me out.”
Lauren hadn’t thought of that night since she told Jonas about it. As far as she was concerned, it was ancient history and hadn’t affected their friendship. But if Lasse needed to get an apology off his chest . . . “Alright, I’m listening.”
“Last year, when I was so scathing about you falling for Jonas, you knew he and I were different, didn’t you?”
“Of course.”
“You recognized a lack in me all those years ago.”
“Lasse . . .”
“Didn’t you?”
Lauren sighed and nodded. “It wasn’t an easy thing for me to accept at the time.”
“But you found that quality in Jonas. That’s why you were willing to take the chance on him that you hadn’t been willing to take on me.”
“Sounds unfair, but yes.”
“You didn’t tell me that last year.”
“There wasn’t much to tell at the time. I only knew what I told you, that being with Jonas felt right, and we both knew we belonged together.”
Lasse looked at her sitting there on the bar-stool. After a year of marriage and the birth of a child, her face still as enchanting as he had always found it. But today, he could look at her and feel simple affection, because he finally understood the real reason Lauren had broken off their relationship all those years ago.
“Well, your intuition was right,” he said.
Lauren looked at him in surprise. That was quite an admission coming from Lasse.
“This morning in church—and by the way, you’re probably the only person I’d ever set foot in any church for—and I watched Jonas take his baby up front to be blessed, I finally understood. That was the quality you were looking for, and you knew I lacked. I could never have become that man, Lauren, not even for you. Nor would I have wanted to. You knew that, didn’t you?”
Lauren looked at him and nodded. “I knew. You are a good man, Lasse, one of the best, but I needed more. I couldn’t change who I was any more than you could change who you were. If we had ended up together, eventually we would have disappointed each other. It was better that I ended it.”
Lasse looked at her for several moments. “You did love me that summer, didn’t you?”
“Yes, I did. But it was the innocent love of a young girl having her first romance, nothing at all like the all-consuming love I feel for Jonas. It’s way past time to let go, Lasse.”
“That’s what I wanted to tell you. I’ve met someone.”
Lauren breathed a sigh of relief. “Oh, Lasse, finally. How did you meet?”
His eyes sparkled with amusement. “We met at Rocky Bay.”
“Rocky Bay? What were you doing at Rocky Bay?” Rocky Bay was a local swimming area, popular with young families. Lasse usually swam off his parents’ private dock, or he dropped by the Juuls’ bathhouse.
“One Sunday afternoon a few weeks back, I found myself at loose ends. It was one of those really warm days we get occasionally, and I decided to laze in the sun, work on my tan. Maybe do some swimming.”
Lauren giggled softly. It sounded so unlike Lasse.
“I spread my towel on a grassy knoll and sat there watching the action near the water. I spotted the cutest little toddler and couldn’t take my eyes off her. She was busy exploring, then suddenly she tripped and tumbled into the water. I ran to pick her up, but her mother got there ahead of me. She had been nearby keeping an eye on her, and I hadn’t noticed because my eyes were on the child. We started talking, and I’ve been seeing her ever since.”
“A single mother, Lasse?”
“A young widow. Her husband passed away from an aggressive type of cancer a month before their baby was born.”
“Oh, how tragic!” Lauren looked at him with soft, sympathetic eyes. “How long has she been a widow?”
“Just over two years. She’s beautiful, Lauren, and she reminds me of you.”
“Oh-oh!”
Lasse chuckled. “I think I said that wrong. She doesn’t look like you. She is fair, with the most amazing pansy-blue eyes. I meant her character and her personality. She is kind and funny and bright, and she is a good mother. And . . .”
Lauren looked at him. “And?”
“She believes in marriage, not in just living together.”
Lauren’s lips twitched. “You have the worst luck with women, Lasse.”
“Not true. I only fall in love with the good ones. I’m in love with her, Lauren. I want to marry her.”
Lauren let out a soft whistle. Finally, Lasse was well and truly over her. She took a deep breath. “Good for you. Does she know how you feel?”
“I haven’t told her yet. We’ve only known each other a month.”
“Well, don’t spoil it by offering a live-in arrangement. She has a child to consider.”
He looked at her and chucked her gently under the chin. “Yeah, I learned that lesson well.”
“I’d like to meet her. How about bringing her and the child to dinner in a couple of weeks. This week is hectic for us with the trip to London, but the following week should work.”
“I’d like that. Thanks, Lauren. You’re a pal. I’ll talk to her and get back to you.”
Lauren couldn’t hide a smile. Lasse finally saw her for what she had been to him for so long, a pal. A friend. She couldn’t wait to tell Jonas.
The Jansens were just saying their goodbyes when Cameron and family finally appeared. Gradually, those not staying with the Juuls took their leave, and twenty-seven people dwindled down to half that number.
After helping to put things in order, they drifted off to different parts of the house or grounds, to relax or explore.
Cameron, wanting some private time with Annie, took her to the once formal upstairs hall, now transformed into a comfortable sitting room. This was where some of Lauren’s favorite pieces from her Manhattan apartment had found a home, including the soft leather sofa she loved.
Cameron and the boys had been given one of the large bedrooms leading off it, Nick and Melanie the other. In the guest wing downstairs, both sets of parents had their own room with a private bath plus a shared sitting room and small kitchen. The Juuls had certainly provided comfortable accommodations for their family.
Settling on the sofa next to Annie, Cameron put an arm around her and looked around. “Quite a place they have taken on, isn’t it?”
Annie smiled. She and Lauren had become good friends this past year. They often spent time together, and Annie was a frequent visitor to Juul’s Haven. “Yes, but it suits them. They seem to have grown into it, especially once the renovations were complete.”
“No doubt about it, it’s an impressive place.”
“I know they don’t look at it that way. To them this is simply the family home. They love it here and hope to fill the rooms with children.”
“Yes, Lauren told me. She asked if I would consider letting the boys come and spend part of their summers with them.”
Annie looked at him. “And will you?”
“We’ll see. I miss them when they’re gone too long.” He looked at her and smiled slightly. She was so pretty with her lovely, heart-shaped face, gentle blue eyes fringed with dark lashes, and a mouth made for kissing. “Annie?”
Her eyes lifted to his.
“I’m in love with you. In fact, I believe the whole family is in love with you.”
Annie looked at him with soft eyes. “I’m glad, because I’m crazy about all of you.”
“But do you love me, Annie?”
/>
He felt her head moving up and down. “I’ve loved you since last summer,” she admitted. It felt so good to finally say the words, so good to have him hold her, to feel his arms around her.
He lifted her face and kissed her gently, then said, “Last year I told myself that you had a life here, that it wouldn’t be fair to expect you to give that up. I don’t think I can do that again.” His dark eyes, so like Lauren’s and just as expressive, didn’t leave hers. “How brave are you?”
“What are you asking?”
“Are you brave enough to take on a man who loves you, two mischievous boys who adore you, and make a new life thousands of miles away? I give you my solemn vow that I will always be faithful to you.”
He didn’t have to say that last part, thought Annie. But a year ago, she had told him about Asle, about his betrayal and how she had suffered at the time. And he had understood because the wife he had loved and trusted put him through something very similar.
“I know you will, Cam. But I’m not a member of your church, and your church is important to you. I can’t give you a guarantee that someday I’ll join, like Jonas did.”
“I’m not asking for that. Can you accept that the boys and I attend church on Sundays? That I may have callings that sometimes require my time?”
Annie knew about callings. Cam and Lauren had both explained how the church worked. Church attendance and callings were the least of her worries.
He looked at her kind, gentle face and faintly troubled eyes, eyes that could sparkle with humor and glow with happiness. “Am I asking too much, Annie? Can you give up your life here and come and be part of us?”
When she didn’t answer right away, he added, “I’ll help you build a travel business in Denver if that’s important to you. Or if not that, I’ll support you in whatever you want to do.”
Annie shook her head and said softly, “It’s not about that, Cam. What if I do everything wrong?”
“I’m willing to take a chance that you’ll do everything right. All that’s required is that you love us. We’re starved for love, Annie, and you are the one we all want. The boys know you are not a member of our church. In fact, Matt suggested that if you wanted to attend your own church, the three of us should take turns going with you so you wouldn’t have to go alone. All they are asking for is the warmth of a mother’s love, and they have chosen you. They love you! I love you! Take a chance on us, Annie. Please?”
Annie’s eyes turned deep blue as a large teardrop trailed down her cheek. Cameron gently stroked her face and carefully kissed the tear away. Her eyes were drenched, which made them even more beautiful. He kept stroking her face as he looked at her and knew beyond a doubt that Annie was meant for him—for them. “Please!” he whispered as his lips met hers in a kiss that took her breath away.
“Please marry me,” he repeated when he finally let her go.
“Are you absolutely sure? You are taking a gamble.”
“On a sure thing. I’m happy when I’m with you. The boys are happy when you are around. You’re perfect for us.”
Annie wrapped her arms around Cameron’s neck, and burying her face against him, held on tight. She murmured, “You make it difficult to say no. What if I screw up?”
Cameron relaxed. She was beginning to see the possibilities. “We’ll straighten you out,” he teased softly against her ear. “And if we screw up, you can rap our knuckles.”
Annie finally lifted her face and smiled brightly. “Promise?”
“On my honor.”
Her smile faltered a little. “I love you, Cam, but I’m scared, too. I don’t want to disappoint you.”
“Oh, Annie! The only way you could disappoint me is if you turned me down. I love you exactly as you are. I don’t want to change anything about . . .” He lifted his head. “What was that noise?”
Annie listened closely. Her face softened. “The baby. Lauren put Camilla down up here.” She stood up and quietly walked toward the nursery. Almost noiselessly, she slid open the pocket door a few inches. The baby was stirring. “Oh, come and look Cam. Isn’t she precious?” Camilla made a few grunts and waved her tiny fists.
“I don’t think Lauren will mind if I get her,” Annie said in a near whisper.
The baby let out a tiny wail.
Cameron smiled and slid the door all the way open. Together they tiptoed toward the bassinet.
Camilla was not shy about demanding attention. Very carefully, Annie picked her up and placed her on the changing table. With gentle movements, she changed the baby’s diaper and snapped the little gown closed. “She is such a beautiful little thing,” she said as she cuddled Camilla in her arms.
“The image of Lauren as a baby.” Cameron’s voice was modulated so he wouldn’t startle her. “I remember how awed Nick and I were when we first saw her.”
Annie’s eyes turned soft. “Would you mind if we had a baby? It would be starting over for you, I know, but . . .”
“As many as you want,” said Cameron and pulled her and the baby close. He was overjoyed. He had wanted more children, but Kellie flatly refused, insisting two were enough. He had been deeply hurt at the time, but as things turned out, it had been for the best. But now . . .
Lauren peered into the room and smiled at the sight of Annie and her brother drooling over tiny Camilla. “Hi,” she said softly. “I heard her fussing over the monitor.”
“I already changed her,” said Annie and reluctantly handed the baby to Lauren. “She is so sweet.”
“Yes, so perfect. Jonas and I had no idea you could love a child this much until she was born.” She settled with Camilla in the large, comfortable rocker.
“We’ll give you some privacy.” Annie leaned down and kissed the baby’s head before she and Cameron left the room, carefully sliding the door closed behind them.
Lauren’s eyes followed them, and she realized that in the short time they had been upstairs they had become a couple.
Downstairs, they found the men in the living room, in lively conversation. The women were nowhere to be found. Looking at Annie, Jonathan said, “The ladies are watching a movie in the guest wing sitting room. Vintage, romantic sap,” he added with a grin. “You are welcome to join the men if that’s not to your liking.”
Annie laughed. She liked Cameron’s father. He had a very dignified look about him, but underneath he was a softie. “I may take you up on that after I raid the fridge. I’m hoping for leftover dessert.”
“A woman after my own heart,” he smiled as Annie headed for the kitchen.
Jonathan was growing fond of Annie. She was charming and self-possessed, and very much at home in Lauren’s house. It comforted him to know that his daughter had found such a good friend in Annie.
He was not as obtuse about certain things as some members of his family liked to pretend he was. He was perfectly aware of Cameron’s feelings for Annie. He’d have to be blind not to notice. But more important, Cameron had confided in him, which made him less concerned about Annie being a non-member than he might otherwise have been. The belief within the family circle that Kellie had left Cameron for another man was true as far as it went. Only his father knew the full, unpalatable truth.
It was his father Cameron turned to after little Matt innocently revealed that he’d seen a strange man in Mom and Dad’s bed when Daddy was away on business. It was his father who held a heartbroken, sobbing Cam in his arms after he, in anguish, confided Kellie’s betrayal, her many infidelities, and it was his father whose support and wisdom Cameron had come to depend on. And a full year ago, Cameron told him of his feelings for Annie.
Going forward, only Cameron could decide what was right for him. But whatever decision he and Annie made about their future, they had Jonathan’s wholehearted love and support.
He glanced at his son. Casually lounging in an easy chair, he was upbeat and smi
ling and for the first time in years looked like he was enjoying life. Jonathan was confident Annie had everything do with that.
Annie was just sitting down with a slice of marzipan cake when the twins burst through the back door. Seeing her with a piece of their favorite cake, they burst out, “Is there any more?”
“There is.” Annie cut off a bite. “Would you like me to cut you a piece each?”
“We don’t want to bother you,” said Matt politely.
“But we wouldn’t mind if you did,” added Josh with a happy smile. “We’re hungry again.”
“Figures,” smiled Annie and rose to get the cake out of the fridge. With her back to them, she said smartly, “You leave my piece alone, Josh! I’m possessive about my marzipan cake. Do not take a single bite!”
“Holy Cow, Annie! Do you have eyes in the back of your head?” scowled Josh and dropped the fork with a clatter.
“I do where you are concerned.”
“Jeez!”
Annie laughed and cut him a generous slice.
“Thanks, Annie,” said Matt with a pleased smile when he saw the size of his piece. “The only time we get this kind of cake is when we visit Grandma Hart. She knows how to make it.”
Annie ruffled his hair affectionately. “I know how, as well,” she said with a wink. “I made this one. My contribution to the buffet.”
“Oh, Annie, you’ve got to marry us,” came his impassioned plea. “Then we could have marzipan cake for our birthdays.”
She laughed softly. “That’s a reason for marriage I hadn’t considered. Are you sure all of you could handle a woman around the house after being by yourselves for so long?”
Matt took a bite of cake, then his face turned grave and thoughtful. “I still remember when our mom lived with us. When we were little she used to be nice, then she changed. It made our dad very sad.
“Dad has always been good to us, and we hated seeing him sad. But, Annie, he hasn’t been sad since last year when he brought you to the ranch. Except he misses you.” Matt looked at her with pleading. “If Josh and I promise to be good, could you at least think about marrying him? And it’s not just about Dad. We don’t want anyone but you, either.”
Because of Lauren: A Love Story Page 39
