"And your mother went along with this?' Josh asked.
"Sure," Genie replied. "With us gone for the day she had the house to herself and didn't have to worry about something disappearing in front of her nose that she needed at the moment, or something she didn't want appearing out of the blue and falling into her lap. But on weekends when we weren't watching some of the best illusionists in the world, Dimitri and I were at a pool hall with Dad, learning about subconscious competence and applying it to playing pool. Dad's intention wasn't for us to learn to play pool though. He wanted us to understand the power of the subconscious mind so we could use it in our everyday lives."
Josh glanced over at the pool table and his brows gathered again, but not so much in curiosity as in skepticism, which he affirmed when he said, "I'm not buying any of this. Subconscious minds can't sink balls in pockets. You've got to be conscious and aware in order to set up a shot and pocket a ball."
"Did you see me setting up any shots?" Genie asked. She pulled a ball out of a side pocket and held it up. "It took me approximately three seconds to pocket this ball."
Josh wrapped his hand around her wrist and removed the ball from her hand, then with his thumb, slowly ran it up her palm, to which she responded by straightening her hand and splaying her fingers. Eyeing her thumb closely, even running the pad of his thumb over hers, while sending a shiver coursing through her, he looked at her steadily, and said, "How did you do it?"
"Are you talking about pocketing balls?"
"No, I'm talking about the thumb trick."
"What's it worth to you to find out?" Genie asked, while allowing her hand to remain in his.
Josh held her gaze. "If a man asked a woman that question he'd be implying that she'd have to go to bed with him to get her answer. Somehow I don't think that's what you're asking."
"You looked pretty good when you were jumping rope," Genie said.
Josh's eyes sharpened. "Then is that what you're asking?"
"Sorry to disappoint you," Genie said. "I was wondering if you'd be willing to give up playing with bulls to know."
Josh released her wrist. "I don't intend to follow in my brother's footsteps, if that's what you're suggesting. So back to pocketing balls. If an explanation comes without conditions, then I want to know how you do it." He folded his arms and waited.
"Okay, no conditions." Genie began collecting the balls on the table and from the pockets and racking them, as she said, "The conscious mind can only handle about eight to ten things at a time, but there's no limit to what the subconscious mind can handle." She moved the racked balls to a front corner of the table, out of the way, then removed one ball and handed it to Josh, and said," Put this on the table anywhere you want."
Josh unfolded his arms and took the ball, then studying the table for a few moments, placed the ball almost centered, and about a third of the way from the far end of the table, then reconsidered and moved the ball off-center.
"Where you put it doesn't matter," Genie said. She handed him the white cue ball. "Put this one anywhere you want."
Josh studied her closely for a few moments, then said in a voice that now held resolve, "You're going to pocket that ball, aren’t you?"
"That's the idea, but it's not 100%." Genie picked up the cue stick, and while circling the table slowly, she said, "Subconscious-competence allows you to do things without having to logically plan in advance every muscle that needs to be activated to do it, like when you're jumping rope. You've practiced it over and over so your subconscious mind has the routine down. You only have to make the conscious decision to do it and your body, guided by your subconscious mind, takes over. It's like you're on automatic pilot, except that before the body can go on automatic pilot it has to be trained. A beginning pool player can't just aim and shoot. The moves have to be programed into the subconscious mind, and that takes time and practice, like jumping rope." She bent over the table and shot, and the cue ball sent the object ball bouncing off a side rail and rolling toward a side pocket, where it dropped in."
"I don't get it," Josh said. "You didn't even plan the shot."
"I didn't have to," Genie replied. "I turned it over to my subconscious and let it take over. The subconscious mind only requires four factors. First, a desire from the conscious mind that creates a goal; second, trusting signals from the conscious mind such as following instincts; third, allowing the subconscious mind to learn and train itself for achieving the goal by making mistakes that aren't judged; and forth, getting out of the way and letting the subconscious mind take over." She took another ball from the rack and handed it to him. "Go ahead, put it anywhere you want, but I have the option of placing the cue ball anywhere I want behind the head spot."
Josh took the ball from Genie, and after studying the table and the pockets, he placed the ball right up against the rail at the end of the table and stepped back. "Go ahead," he said. "I want to see how you'll do this shot."
Genie shrugged and replied, while circling the table, "I'll do what I did with the last shot… start by setting a mental goal of refusing to aim before I shoot, then drawing a mental path between the ball and the pocket, and shooting. Dad had Dimitri and me practicing this at home like other kids practiced for music lessons. The first time I made a shot I thought it was luck, but when I started doing it consistently I began to have faith, which got me into the second factor that the subconscious mind needs, which is trust. Once I began to follow my instincts, my subconscious mind trained itself for my goal, which was shooting without aiming. When I began making tougher and tougher shots without effort, I was into the forth factor, which was getting out of my own way. But all the time you're programing your subconscious mind, you have to keep reminding yourself not to aim."
She bent over the table and shot the cue ball, sending it slowly down the table to graze the object ball, which trailed along the end rail at a snail's pace and dropped into a corner pocket.
"I want to see you do that again," Josh said, his voice a blend of challenge and impatience, a man who didn't like not having all the answers, Genie concluded.
"Fine then, place another ball."
Josh took an inordinate amount of time to place the ball, but when Genie bent down to shoot, she felt a little ripple of doubt. She'd managed to tune Josh out on every other shot and allow her subconscious mind to take over, but now she was all too aware of the man standing not more than a few feet from her. It was almost a pulsating thing, feeling his presence. To counter it, she sighted in, taking extra time to align her cue stick with the cue ball, which went against everything she'd just told him about not aiming, and when she shot, the cue ball hit the object ball off mark, sending it rebounding off the rail at the wrong angle and rolling to a halt a few inches from the pocket. When she looked at Josh, he was smiling.
She shrugged. "I told you it wasn't 100%. One trap you can fall into when applying subconscious competence is to suddenly start doubting it and try to control it instead of letting the mind take over. That's what just happened."
"What made you start doubting?" Josh asked.
"Your presence," Genie replied then wondered why she'd admitted it.
The glint of understanding had Josh asking, "Me in particular, or anyone?"
As Genie looked into a pair of dark, perceptive eyes, she found herself saying, "You."
Realizing she'd revealed more than she'd intended, and not wanting to explain further, she placed a ball on the table, and said, "In a nutshell, mentally draw a line between the object ball and the pocket—" with a shaky finger she indicated an imaginary line "—then extend the line past the object ball and imagine where the cue-ball needs to hit and draw a mental line from that to the center of the object ball."
She hoped she was making sense, but her mind was divided between what she was trying to say and the fact that Josh had a slight smile on his lips, and his eyes held a gleam that told her he knew he was rattling her, which made her heart quicken.
Returning her attent
ion to the table, she continued with, "Then the next thing is to umm… line both feet and the… umm… cue along the line of the ball—" which she thought she did "—then go down for the shot. If you're … lined up correctly you don't have to… have to… adjust your aim any further. Just look at the cue ball and the object ball and make the shot…"
Before she could shoot, she felt the cue stick slipping from her hands, and Josh was around behind her where he took her arm and pulled her around and kissed her.
When their lips met, Genie was too stunned to do anything but kiss him back, all the while wondering what on earth was happening to her that made her want to kiss him the way she was, while also questioning how his lips could feel so familiar and comfortable on hers, like maybe they belonged there, and she had no will to dislodge the muscular arms from around her, and the whole untimely kiss should not be taking place in the middle of the lodge because…
Guests! She broke the kiss immediately and looked around the room.
"They're all gone," Josh said. "They left some time ago."
Genie scanned the empty room and wondered how she'd failed to be aware of the guests leaving. Looking at Josh, whose hands were clasped together behind her waist, she said, "Why did you do that?"
Josh eyed her with amusement. "Because you wanted me to."
"How could you possibly draw that conclusion when I was playing pool?"
"You weren't playing pool just before I kissed you," Josh said. "You were distracted and unfocused and trying to tell me something, and making no sense." He released her and handed her the cue stick. "Now you can go back to what you were trying to say when I interrupted you."
Genie had not yet recovered from the feel of Josh's lips on hers and the closeness of his arms around her, and she knew her hands were too shaky to shoot, so she licked her lips to stop the tingling, drew in a long, slow breath to clear her mind, and said, "The way it works is that over time you begin to get a gut feeling that tells you whether or not you'll make the shot. You'll just look at the pocket, look at the ball, wait for the yes in your head, and shoot. It's an intuitive gut thing that takes time to develop. I felt it just before I missed that last shot, but I didn't take the time to realign myself and have faith in my subconscious."
"And I think you missed because that intuitive gut thing you're talking about was telling you that a man in the room wanted to kiss you and your subconscious mind was telling you to go ahead." This time Josh took the cue stick from her hand and hung it in the rack.
"I thought you wanted to learn how to run four balls," Genie said.
"I did," Josh replied, "but I can think of better things to do with our time right now."
When he started toward her, Genie backed away while saying, "I don't know what you have in mind but that was a pretty reckless thing for us to do."
"Reckless?" Josh said. "We kissed."
"Yes, but it's reckless when it doesn't mean anything."
"It meant something to me."
"Sure, you're a man and men like getting things going with women, but I have a little sister to raise, and going around kissing men can't be a part of it."
Josh walked up to her, and this time Genie didn't move when he curved his hands over her shoulders, looked at her steadily, and said, "I don't go around trying to get things going with women. I kissed you because it's been coming on since I was in the hospital. I'm also aware that you have a little sister to raise, which is why I want to take her riding tomorrow and be the one to give her her first riding lesson. Can that be a part of raising Abby?"
"I don't know," Genie said.
"Then I'll answer for you. Right after dinner I'll have a horse saddled for you, and Abby will ride in front of me, and we'll ride to the box canyon so you and Abby can see the petroglyphs, but on the way I'll take you to a spot where you'll see a view you won't soon forget."
Josh moved toward her, like he was going to kiss her again, but before he could, Genie ducked her shoulders from beneath his palms, and said, "I need to get back to the house."
"Then we're on for tomorrow?" Josh asked.
"Well, yes, I suppose so," Genie replied.
When she turned to leave, Josh called after her. "Incidentally," he said, "that shirt looks good on you. You're beginning to look like a ranch girl."
Genie laughed. "At least you're not telling me I look like Nurse Ratched in western wear."
Josh smiled in amusement and said nothing more.
It wasn't until Genie was approaching the house that the impact of what Josh had said a few minutes earlier hit her. He'd kissed her because it had been coming on since he was in the hospital, which made no sense. She'd thought she'd made herself clear, even while she'd wanted to do exactly what they'd just done, so it seemed he was an unusually perceptive man. He also wanted to be the one to teach Abby to ride and even asked if that could be a part of raising Abby, almost as if he was asking if he could be a part of raising her.
So, it seemed, Josh was living the same pipedream as she, a pipedream that attempted to morph two diametrically opposed lifestyles into one, which wasn't going to happen. But she would allow Josh to teach Abby to ride. He was experienced on a horse, and it wouldn't be right to deny Abby that simple pleasure. Besides, she'd been curious about the petroglyphs since her last visit, she reasoned, and tried not to analyze beyond that.
***
After dinner the following day, instead of leading a horse, Josh arrived at the house with Ferdinand walking behind like a well-trained dog, except that Ferdinand was a Brahma bull with a saddle on his back and a bridle on his big gawky head. Genie hadn't mentioned anything to Abby about riding because she hadn't been around Josh enough to know if he was the kind of man who made promises in all sincerity but was subject to reneging if something better came up. Their father had a tendency to do that, though not because he had a change of plans, but because his agent did the booking and shows often conflicted with plans their father made with his kids, not being able to be with Abby on her fourth birthday being an example. But seeing Josh and Ferdinand heading toward the house, Genie poked her head into the kitchen, where Abby was helping Gwama Ruuf with the dishes, and said to her, "Abby, honey, Josh is coming to teach you to ride, and then he's taking us to a place where pictures are painted on a big rock."
"Yeah, yeah, yeah!" Abby cried, as she ran out the kitchen.
Genie stepped onto the porch, with Abby right behind, and as Josh approached, she said, "I thought we'd be riding horses."
"We will," Josh replied, "but I want to take Abby around on the lead line first and let her get used to being in a saddle." He turned to Ferdinand, who'd stopped when he stopped, then touched the bull on the rump and said, "Ferdinand, sit."
Ferdinand blinked a couple of times, slowly lowered his haunches to the ground, and eyed Josh in expectation. Josh reached into his pocket and gave him an alfalfa nugget.
Abby giggled, then said to Josh in an excited voice, "Can I get on Ferdan now?"
"You can as soon as we put a helmet on your head." Josh lifted a child's helmet off the saddle horn and slipped it onto Abby's head and fastened the chin strap. "You look like a real bull rider now," he said. "They wear helmets too."
Abby glanced back at Genie and smiled, and when Genie looked at Josh, he winked, which had Genie's heart accelerating, while at the same time suppressing the comment she was prepared to make about him glorifying bull riders in Abby's mind.
"Okay, up you go," Josh said to Abby. He lifted her onto the saddle and positioned her feet into the stirrups. "Hold the saddle horn while Ferdinand gets up."
After Abby grasped the horn with both hands, Josh said, "Ferdinand, up."
Giving a low, throaty grunt, Ferdinand raised his haunches and stood.
Abby looked at Josh, eyes bright with excitement, and said, "I did it! I'm widing Ferdan."
Josh looked at her in amusement. "Okay honey, now we're going to play Simon says. Do you know that game?"
Abby looked at Josh, b
rows drawn, and said, "Is it like Hawwy says?"
Josh glanced over at Genie, who shrugged, and replied, "Dad's version of Simon Says, but instead of Simon it's Harry Houdini."
Josh got a little half-smile. "Okay then, Harry says, stretch your arms out like an airplane." He splayed his arms out, and Abby released the horn and did the same. "Good job," Josh said, drawing a wide grin from Abby.
While Josh continued playing Harry Says, Abby followed his instructions by twisting her waist with her arms out, and touching Ferdinand's rump and his neck, and making scissor kicks with her legs, and swinging both feet forward then backward.
Genie watched the expressions on both faces. Abby was clearly enthralled with Josh, and from her intense look, she was listening carefully to what he was asking her to do. And Josh's face showed a combination of amusement and affection, like this little girl who'd wandered into his life was important to him now.
"Okay, honey," Josh said, "I want you to pick up the reins, which are these leather straps, and hold them so they're in a straight line from Ferdinand's mouth to your hands, and we'll take a walk, but you have to listen carefully to what I say."
"Is Hawwy gonna tell me things again?" Abby asked.
"No, I'll be telling you from now on because I'm going to be the one to teach you to ride, so you'll need to forget Harry and listen to me, okay?"
Abby bobbed her head and waited.
"Okay, give Ferdinand a little kick and tell him to walk," Josh instructed.
Abby looked at Ferdinand's big head, and said, "Walk."
On command the bull started off, or maybe he did because Josh was walking in front and holding the lead line, Genie figured. But for a huge, hump-back bovine that weighed upwards of two-thousand pounds, he was amazingly docile, and she wondered at the incongruity that this same breed, by nature, could easily kick, gore, crush, or trample a person to death.
After Josh led Abby around a few more times, he said to her, "You're ready to ride a horse, so let's head for the barn and turn Ferdinand out and go get saddled up."
"Am I a cowgirl now?" Abby asked.
Dancing With Danger: Book 8: Dancing Moon Ranch Series Page 6
