My legs tremble as his explanation takes shape. Jax notices, and leads me to the edge of the bed. Pushing me gently by the shoulders until I’m sitting, I allow him to pull me into his side when he sits next to me.
“You work at a hospital?” My voice sounds hesitant to my ears. He holds the answers I seek, yet I’m unsure if I want to know them. Why? I don’t know, but something feels wrong.
“Yes. I’m a neurosurgeon.” Jax’s tone conveys his pride in his profession, his chest puffing as he continues. “I operated on you once they stabilized your other injuries. I’m the reason you’re alive without any signs of brain damage. I’m the reason you’re regaining your memories one at a time. My techniques are working, baby.”
Bounding to his feet, his excitement fills the room. The enthusiasm Jax exudes is contagious, bringing a smile to my face even though I don’t entirely follow what he’s saying.
“You and me Amber, we’re the perfect couple. Baby, we’re going to have it all. My techniques will fix you. Your recovery will put me on the map and make my career. And you are...”
“A teacher.” I cut him off, the words falling from my mouth without conscious thought but with utmost certainty.
Staring at Jax blankly, all I can see in my mind’s eye is a woman who looks like a healthy version of the one I just saw in the mirror addressing a classroom of children who appear to be five or six years old. The woman—me—looks happy, a large grin covering her face as she reads to the children who are sitting quietly on a threadbare carpet. I’m mentally comparing the expensive looking bedroom I’m sitting in with the cheap furnishings of the classroom in my vision when I’m startled by Jax’s outburst.
“NO!” He yells. “You are not a teacher. You are my fiancée.”
Seizing me by the shoulders as he drops to his knees in front of me, Jax peers into my face—deep into my eyes—and shakes me like a disobedient child. His dark eyes radiate his fury at my assertion, as if the mere mention of teaching is a personal insult to him. The panic that gripped me earlier takes hold once more, and my heart pounds in my chest as my mouth becomes dry.
“Yes,” I croak, the need to placate him threatening to overwhelm me. “I am your fiancée.”
If I hadn’t seen how angry he was with my own eyes, I wouldn’t have believed the change in him. At my acquiescence, the fury melts from his features. He lets go of my shoulders and hugs me to him.
“That’s right, baby. You’re my fiancée. Your career is to support mine. You’re my backbone.”
Relief courses through me at his calm response. Letting go of me, Jax stands and pulls me to my feet by each hand. His hold is gentle, although his tone leaves no room for argument when he speaks, “That’s enough talking for today, baby. I don’t want you to overdo it.”
Nodding, I smile when he kisses me, running his fingers down my sides before cupping my ass and grinding me against him. His touch creates an instantaneous reaction within me, stoking my libido and spreading warmth through my limbs. My reaction is bizarre, almost an ingrained response, and it unsettles me that I’d respond with such potency to a man who was menacing me, not even two minutes ago.
“Have a shower and get dressed, Amber. I’ll head downstairs and make some coffee.”
In silence, I watch as he dresses in a dark business suit, knotting his tie as he moves to leave the room. I blow a kiss in response to the one Jax blows my way as he exits, simply because I know he expects it.
The moment the bedroom door shuts behind him; I breathe a sigh of relief at finally being alone.
My eyebrows drawn together, tongue poking from the corner of my mouth, I rifle through all of the drawers before heading into the walk-in robe. With one ear listening for Jax, I quickly scan the contents of the closet. Nothing looks familiar, yet everything appears to be my size. None of it strikes me as being my style, yet try as I might I can’t picture my style.
Searching Jax’s side, I don’t find anything of interest. The bedroom and closet appears to belong to a well-off couple in their early thirties. Which is exactly how Jax described us. Shaking my head at my irrational suspicions, I give up my exploration and head for the bathroom to shower and dress as requested. As I’m showering, my predominate thought is about poor Jax and the stress he must be under trying to help me regain my memories, especially in face of the paranoia I seem to be suffering as a side effect.
I don’t remember him, but I’m certain that I’m incredibly lucky to have such a man for support.
CHAPTER TWO
“So she didn’t argue with you this morning? She accepted your story?” A woman’s voice poses the questions as I’m walking down the ornate stair case. The delicious scent of cinnamon French toast fills the air as I descend, making my stomach rumble.
After taking my time showering and dressing, it became apparent that I needed to venture outside of the bedroom. Jax obviously wasn’t coming back for me. Mustering every ounce of courage I could find, I’d pulled open the heavy bedroom door and peered into the luxuriously appointed hallway. The expensive furnishings and abnormally long length of the hallway lead me to decide that either Jax or I come from old family money. I don’t know how I know but it’s not possible for a neurosurgeon and his unemployed fiancée to live in such a palatial home without possessing serious money to begin with.
“We had one tense moment when she mentioned being a teacher but apart from that, it all went to plan.” Jax answers, sounding smug and filled with glee. Nothing at all like the understanding and patient man I met this morning. I remind myself that he wasn’t totally understanding or patient, his reaction to my comment about being a teacher was quite scary and over-the-top if I’m honest.
“Oh Jax.” The woman laughs, great peals of laughter that set the hair on the back of my neck on end. “Your techniques are working. Her new memories will be irreversible within the month...” She trails off when I accidentally stumble down the last step, my heels clicking loudly against the marble floor as I struggle not to topple over.
“Amber?” Jax appears through a doorway, an apron around his waist and an egg flip in his hand. “Are you okay, baby?”
An older looking woman follows us into the kitchen as Jax grips my elbow and leads me towards a breakfast bar. Picking me up by the waist, he places me onto one of the tall stools before heading around the other side of the bench and continuing to flip the toast he’s cooking.
Pulling my eyes from his strong forearms as they flex while he works, I turn to face the newcomer. She’s an attractive older lady with blonde hair and the slightly pinched look about her features that people who’ve just embarked upon fillers and Botox get about them. I’d put her in her mid-forties.
“Good morning, Amber. How are you today, sweetheart?” Her words are caring but their delivery seems condescending.
I take an instant dislike to her. “Who are you?”
“Now baby, surely you remember Nurse Belinda?” Jax interjects. Spinning on my stool to look at him, I shrug. Placing a delicate china plate filled with French toast in front of me, he kisses my cheek. “Belinda has been looking after you while I’m at work ever since you were discharged. We’re very lucky to have her. Lucky that she accepted our offer to leave the hospital and look after you full time for me.”
Jax bestows a brilliant, megawatt smile on Belinda and she visibly preens under his attention.
“It was a very generous offer, Jax.” She purrs.
Honestly? I might not remember the man or my feelings for him, but he’s my fiancé not hers. Her behavior gets my back up. Unsure how to react, I take a bite of the French toast. A moan escapes me as the cinnamon bursts over my taste buds.
Wow, he can cook.
“You like that, baby?” He asks, running a finger down my cheek as he gazes in my eyes. A haze of lust overcomes me at his touch, my nipples pebbling noticeably through the sheer top I’m wearing over a silky camisole. Belinda’s sardonic snorting breaks through my mindless response and I make myself m
ove away from Jax.
Swallowing, I nod. “It’s yummy.”
Peering up at Jax when he doesn’t answer me, I notice the silent conversation he’s having with Belinda over my head. He doesn’t look happy with her, wrath coloring his demeanor as he appears to chastise her for laughing at me. Intrigued, I chance a look at Belinda. I’m left in shock at what I see.
Fear is written all over her face—her eyes wide and beseeching, her face pale under her makeup, her mouth opening and closing as she silently pleads for forgiveness. She’s scared of Jax.
“Amber.” Jax is gruff as he demands my attention.
Swiveling my head back to him, I’m thrown further when I take in his blank countenance. Not a sign of his anger can be seen, he’s expressionless. My misgivings from earlier in our bedroom return with vengeance. Maybe my suspicions are founded after all?
“Amber.” He clicks his fingers in front of my face, pulling me from my dark worries.
“Jax.” I answer him after a long second.
“Eat up, baby. You need a full stomach before I administer your meds. I have time for a memory session before I’m needed at the hospital but only if you hurry.”
Hesitant to call him out on what I just witnessed, equally reticent to question the meds and memory session, I smile at him as if I’m blasé to what just happened and dig into my now cooled toast.
CHAPTER THREE
“Okay, baby.” Jax blows on the crook of my elbow to dry the antiseptic wipe he’s just spread over my veins. “Take a deep breath. This will only be a slight pinch.”
Screwing my eyes shut as he injects the clear fluid into my vein, I immediately feel woozy and light headed. Turning my head from where I’m lying on the velvet settee in his office, I search for his handsome face as the room spins.
I should’ve asked more questions instead of blindly following them into the office once I’d finished my breakfast. In a dark recess of my mind, the thought that I’m not the meek, easy-to-please girl that I seem to be around Jax pops free.
“I’m gonna be sick...” I try to tell him but the words are mumbled, tripping over themselves in their rush to leave me. As quick as it comes, the nausea leaves and I’m left with a feeling of indescribable ecstasy. My body feels as if it’s glowing, my cheeks heating as a smile breaks free of its own accord.
It’s impossible to describe how awesome I feel. I’m positive that I could climb Mount Everest, leap tall buildings in one bound, and run a marathon all at the same time. And then some.
“Amber?” Jax sounds as if he’s underwater. “Baby, ride the wave for me.”
Clasping my hand in his big warm one, he grins at me. His eyes appear comically large in his head and his hair takes on a life of its own. It looks like it’s waving from the top of his head.
“Wave...” I giggle as I watch his hair moving. When the waving of his hair becomes impossibly faster, dizziness grips me. My eyes begin to roll back in my head and that makes the grin slip from Jax’s face. He slaps me on the cheek. Hard. It stings and pulls me back to the present.
“Stay with me. We can’t afford to lose this progress.” Jax doesn’t sound as nice anymore. The compassion that normally tinges his tone has been replaced with a callous disregard for my drugged state.
“Tell me your name?” His terse question makes me frown. Jax knows my name. The relentless need that I feel to please him hits me. I answer in a rush, eager to stop the scowl that’s beginning to cross his face from taking shape.
“Amber Marie St George.”
Pulling my hand into his lap, he runs his thumb over my inner wrist. His tender touch increases my already erratic pulse and the cloud of desire that overpowers me every time he touches me takes over again.
“Good girl.” He rubs the thin skin on my wrist again. I clamp my thighs together in response.
“How does this make you feel, Amber Marie St George?”
“Horny.” I snicker at my honesty, the snicker becoming a full blown belly rumbling laugh when Jax joins in.
“That means it’s working, baby.”
The moment is lost when his voice becomes harsh and demanding as he throws questions at me, pausing only long enough for me to answer.
“How old are you?”
“Thirty.”
“Where do you live?”
“Here.”
“Who do you live with?”
“You.”
“How long have we been together?”
“Since I finished high school.”
“Where do you work?”
“At the Montgomery State School.”
“WRONG!” Jax bellows at me, throwing my hand away from him. I shrink back into the settee, quaking in fear. “Belinda. Come here.”
Nurse Belinda moves out of the shadows where she’s been sitting quietly since we entered the office. As she comes toward me, a memory breaks free.
A big, strong looking man with sandy brown hair and kind eyes is reaching for me, jokingly pleading with me to come with him but I’m refusing. Laughing as I tell him I’m too busy for that now and that I’ll see him after work, I turn my back and walk away from him. When he heads off in the opposite direction, I spin on my heel and run after him, jumping on his back and wrapping my arms around his neck. Planting a kiss on his cheek, I whisper in his ear...
“I love you Xander.” The words tumble from my mouth, causing Belinda to freeze and Jax to turn red with rage.
“What did you say?” He’s apoplectic, a vein pulsing in his forehead as he reaches for me.
Grabbing me by the front of my shirt, he leans into me. My head lolls as the drug in my system impedes my ability to control my extremities. “Mention him again and I’ll double the dose. I’m taking it easy on you. If I wanted, I could make you a vegetable and rebuild you from there. Do not test me, Amber.” Throwing me back into the seat, he stalks over to his desk and grabs another syringe.
“Hold her.”
Belinda snatches my arm, holding it straight. It’s futile to fight her grip but I try. Jax curses me, pushing me onto my back and straddling my waist as she wrestles me for control of my arm. I scream and struggle, but it doesn’t help. I feel the tell-tale prick of the needle as he propels the insidious drug into my unwilling body once again.
When the new dose meets the remnants already flowing through my bloodstream, the light headedness and nausea engulfs me. My eyesight dims, black spots dominating as my eyelids flutter open and shut.
“Get the electro wand, Belinda. Maybe another shock treatment will fix her. It worked yesterday, she was the best she’s ever been this morning.” Jax’s words spin around my head, scaring me to death. I want to protest. I want to defend myself, but despite my best efforts, I can’t beat back the impending darkness that’s stealing my consciousness.
AMNESIA
Currently available for FREE on Wattpad and to my newsletter subscribers.
ACKNOWLEDGMENTS
Mick, Dylan, and Mickayla.
My rocks. My family. My life.
Also, Mick, this book is on your head. I hold you responsible for my UFC addiction, and my irrational attraction to Michael Bisping and Mark Hunt.
Philena, Megan, and Heather.
Once again, thank you for taking the beta read for me. Each book is better than the one before it because of your suggestions. I’d be lost without you.
Abbey.
My PA extraordinaire. When the going gets tough, you’re there with a smart-assed comment, a joke, or a well-timed kick up the ass. Love you lady #supermum
P.S. Zana FTW!
Philena.
Thank you for all the time you put into the Kollective. The weight that you take off my shoulders with the knowledge that if I’m absent for a few days you’ll be there to keep everyone engaged and happy is immense. You make my life so much easier. You are a priceless gem xx
Nathan Hainline and Cassady Rose
The cover photo featuring both of you is perfection. Nate: your ability to t
ake my brief and turn it into the powerful shots that convey my story is astonishing. It was a pleasure working with you, and I wish you and Cassady every success.
Judi.
As always, you took my hair-brained, half-baked “suggestions” and turned them into a cover that I’m proud to call mine. Your dedication, your skill, and the time and effort you invest is second-to-none. The fact that you accomplish all of this without one word of complaint while you battle your health is unbelievable and a testament to your strength. I’m glad to call you my “Yoda”.
To the ladies of Kylie’s Kollective.
My favorite place to escape to when I’m looking to have some fun. Drama free. Fun. Sexy. What more could an author ask for.
Love you all xx
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Kylie Hillman is an Australian author.
Wife to a Harley-riding, boating and fishing, four-wheel driving, underground mining quintessential Aussie bloke.
Mum to two crazy, adorable, and original kids.
Crohn's Disease sufferer and awareness campaigner.
She’s also an avid tea drinker, a connoisseur of 80s/90s rock music, and is known for lacing everything she says with sarcasm and inappropriate innuendo.
Formerly working in finance, she was forced to reevaluate her plans for her life when severe Crohn's Disease brought her corporate career to a screeching halt. Restarting her childhood hobbies of writing and reading to alleviate the monotony of being sick and housebound, she found her calling and is enjoying life to the max. A typical day is now spent in the “real” world where she hangs out with her awesome family and “book” world where she gets to chill with her fictional characters.
Kylie writes the books she wants to read. A lover of strong men who aren't perfect and aren't afraid to admit it, straight-talking women who embrace their vulnerabilities, and real life gritty stories, she hopes these themes shine through her writing. An avid reader of all genres, Kylie hopes to release books that keep the reader on the edge of their seat—be it with suspense, romance, or laughter.
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