by Grace White
KAI
“What’s up, sucker?” Laker dropped down on the bench beside me. “Big game tonight.”
“I know.”
“Your head in the right place? You’ve been quiet this week. You know … if it would make you feel better, why don’t you just go talk to her? Some of the rumors have been—”
“Now you care?” I asked, unable to hide the bitterness in my voice.
“I care. I care that ever since she showed up, you haven’t been in the game. It’s the biggest year of your life. Trust me, I care. But you’re dragging your ass around like you’re wounded. I thought you called it off? You did call it off, didn’t you?”
When Laker had asked me if I’d broken things off with Daiya, I hadn’t denied it. But I hadn’t confirmed it either. Now the whole school knew, which meant Daiya knew … she had to.
“I don’t know, okay?” I stood, hitching my bag over my shoulder. “I need to get out of here.”
“Kai,” Lacey called, but I had to get away. She’d been the only one to encourage me to talk to Daiya. The guys just wanted their friend back, their star player, but Lacey knew how much I liked Daiya. Love, how much you love her, my subconscious whispered, but I shut it down. I couldn’t think about that; not when the image of him standing there, in her house, was imprinted on my memory.
I’d considered the possibility of a rational explanation, but deep down in my gut, I knew the truth. They had lied. They were still lying. About what, I didn’t know, but I was tired of the secrets. Tired of Daiya shutting me out. Isaac was right—what did I really know about her?
Nothing.
I knew nothing.
Daiya was elusive and mysterious, and I’d been drawn to that. From the first time I laid eyes on her, I felt it—the urge to know to her. And before I knew it, I was in deep. Too deep. Daiya acted like she had no experience with guys, said that I was her first everything, but how could someone with such allure be inexperienced? Maybe that was her game all along—reel me in, manipulate me, use me. But to what end?
Ugh. It was so frustrating. I could feel the answer in the not so distance. I kicked a stone, sending it careening into the trashcan. A group of kids glanced over at me, but I kept walking. Something was happening to me, building in me. A storm was brewing in my chest, fighting for a way out. Before I knew it, I had left the school grounds. I did not intend to skip class, but I couldn’t be there. Not with her so close. It was like I was suffocating in my own skin.
Drowning.
I needed distance. From Daiya. From my friends. From hockey. From Isaac.
But as the school disappeared behind me, my chest didn’t feel lighter; it felt heavier. And I realized there were some things you could never outrun.
“Make the pass, make the pass!” Coach’s voice cut over the ice, and I drew my stick back, glancing up to check that Bobby was still open. The puck slid over to him with perfect precision, and he flicked it into the goal.
“Nice one, Stanton.” My teammates congratulated me as they zipped past me to get to Bobby who was saluting the cheering crowd.
“That shot should have been yours.” Laker skated up beside me.
“We scored; isn’t that enough?” He couldn’t see my shoulders drop underneath all the protective gear.
“Is it?” he challenged. “Coach might be fooled, but you’re not fooling me, man.”
“What the fuck do you want from me?” I growled.
“I want you to wake up and smell your future. Most of us would pay to be in your position, and you’re throwing it away over some girl.”
Anger pulsed through me, and I moved to square up to him, but Coach’s voice yelled, “Stanton, Laker, get over here.”
We hopped up into the box to join the rest of the team. There were still minutes left on the clock, but we had the win in the bag.
“That’s more like it. Bobby, Stanton, nice work.”
Laker grumbled something next to me. His attitude was starting to irritate me.
“Okay, get back out there …” Coach’s voice became a buzzing sound, drowned out by the echo of the crowd. I closed my eyes, soaking up the atmosphere and letting it wash over me. I felt most at home out on the ice. But it wasn’t the same knowing she wasn’t here. And part of me hated her for it. For taking away the one constant in my life. Next to Mom, hockey had been it for me. Until she walked into Decker County and changed everything. Because my teammates, Coach, and Laker—they were all right. I was screwing everything up because of her.
“Stanton, get the hell out there,” Coach boomed, and I leaped into action, tumbling over the side. Laker’s glare burned holes into the side of my helmet, but I refused to acknowledge him. Just because he was right didn’t mean I had to like it.
I hitched my bag up my shoulder, ready to leave, when Laker shouted, “You’re coming, right?” He ran a brisk hand over his head, but I didn’t reply, still pissed at him. “Come on. I was a jerk, okay? I just can’t stand to see you throw away everything for her. You’re not even together anymore.”
“You’re a dick. You know that, don’t you?” I said coolly.
“Yeah, I know, but I’m your dick.” He cleared his throat. “That came out all wrong. I just mean—”
“I know what you mean.” My eyes darted around the emptying parking lot, disappointment settling in my chest when I realized she really wasn’t here.
“So you’ll come?”
“I don’t know.” I didn’t feel like partying. Not even with our usual crew.
“Come on; it’s only a few of us. My mom stocked the refrigerator.”
“Okay, okay, but no more talk of Daiya.”
“You have my word.” He slung his arm over my shoulder and started guiding me to his truck. “At least Myers isn’t hanging around me like a rash now.”
I jabbed him in the stomach. Laker could be a real ass at times.
“What was that for?” he yelped.
I shook my head, managing a weak smile. He could downplay it all he wanted, but he liked her. I knew he did.
“You’re a real dick sometimes.”
Laker laughed, releasing me and going around to the driver’s side. “Like I said before, I’m your dick.” He flashed me a grin and opened the door, sliding in the truck. I climbed inside the passenger side and watched the rink disappear as he pulled out of the parking lot. My body was exhausted and drained from the hard game, but I couldn’t shake the feeling it was more than just physical exertion.
Ten minutes later, we pulled up outside Laker’s house, and I frowned. “I thought you said low key.” His house looked like party central.
“This isn’t on me. I invited the usual crowd, and that’s it.” His eyes swept over the scene in front of us as he drove up the driveway. “What the fuck?”
We exited Laker’s truck and made our way up to the house. No one was inside, but his front yard was teeming with people.
“Bobby, mind telling me what the hell is going on?”
Clearly, he was as clueless as we were. “It wasn’t me, I promise. I guess word got around we were here, and the masses followed.”
Laker opened his door, and we ducked inside. “Get rid of them.”
“Me?” Bobby gasped. “What the fuck can I do? Everyone is expecting a party.”
They both looked at me, and I shot Laker a look that could kill. “You promised.”
“I know, but B’s right. They’re here now, and besides, we should celebrate. We needed that win.”
The door burst open behind us, and bodies flooded into the hallway as music blasted from someone’s docking station.
“Fine, fine,” I grumbled. “I’ll be in the pool house.” It was always the one place off-limits.
“Come on, Kai, one drink.” His plea rolled off me as I walked away from them and toward a pity party for one.
A knock on the door startled me, and my eyes strained against the darkness. Where was I? I could just make out the shadow of the forty-eight-inch screen
hanging on the wall and games scattered on the floor beside an entertainment cabinet. I was at Laker’s? In the pool house? Crap. I must have fallen asleep.
Knock, knock.
I rubbed my face and dragged myself off the couch to open the door.
“Oh, hey, Kai, Laker sent me over here to check on you.” Tamara smiled up at me, and I frowned. “He did?”
“Yeah, you’ve been in here all night.” She peered around me into the dark pool house. “Is everything okay?”
“Just tired, I guess.”
“It’s getting a little crazy back there. Hmm, could I quickly use the bathroom? I know the pool house is off-limits, but I’m sure I saw Kevin and Amanda enter the bathroom in the house and no one needs to see that.” She grimaced.
“Sure.” I pulled the door wider, letting her duck underneath my arm. “It’s at the back.” My eyes shuttered as a pain shot through my temples, and I gripped the door for support. When it passed, I closed the door and went back to the couch. I didn’t feel so good. My whole body ached. If I didn’t know better, I would say I was getting the flu.
“All done, thanks.” Tamara appeared. “Are you sure you’re okay?”
“I’m fine. Just got a headache.”
When she didn’t make a move to leave, I stood and walked to the door.
“I could stay? Keep you company.”
“Tamara,” I said, hoping she’d get the message. This wasn’t the first time she’d come on to me. I wasn’t interested then, and I certainly wasn’t interested now.
“Come on, Kai, we could be good together.” She brushed her hand up her tank top and along the bare skin at the curve of her neck. “I can help you forget her.”
My eyes widened, and a low growl formed in my throat. “Don’t.”
Tamara’s smile slipped, jealousy flashing in her eyes.
“You should go.” I motioned to the door. “Good night, Tamara.”
She narrowed her gaze as anger replaced the longing and sashayed past me without so much as a word. My eyes tracked her all the way back to the house, but when they landed on the person standing on the patio, fury flared through me. Joel’s eyes burned with their own rage, and before I had time to think it over, I was moving toward him. “What the fuck are you doing here?”
“Stanton.” He smirked. “Nice to see you, too.”
Tamara stood next to her brother, watching our exchange. She’s set me up. Baited me straight into the lion’s den. Bitch.
“You have no right to be here.”
“I came to pick up my sister, but where’s that pretty little girl of yours? Maybe I’ll stick around to—” Warm breath whooshed from his lungs as I slammed him against the wall, my hand wrapping around his throat. I felt his corded muscles underneath my skin. Heard the impact of his back hitting the wall. But something had taken over me.
Someone screamed, and then all hell broke loose. Laker and some of the guys rushed outside. Strong arms came around my waist trying to pry me away, but I held firm all while Joel looked unfazed with a slight smirk still evident on his face.
“Kai, ease up. Come on, man, not here, not like this.” Laker’s voice reached the rational part of me, and my hold on Joel loosened. But still, he didn’t move. It was as if he was waiting—biding his time—to see what I’d do next. And then it hit me. He was goading me. He wanted me to lose it, and I’d walked right into his trap.
I released him with a sharp snap, and his body sagged off the wall. “Didn’t know you had it in you, Stanton.” Joel brushed himself off, and Laker held me back. But I was done, for now.
“Come near Daiya again, and I will kill you.”
“Word on the street is she’s free property.”
“Fuck you,” I spat, lunging forward, but Laker was strong, and my adrenaline was rapidly depleting. In fact, I felt like I was crashing, and fast. Laker was holding me up as much as he was holding me back.
“Get out of here, Joel. You too, Tamara,” Laker demanded. Tamara went to reply, but her brother shook his head. Throwing me one last smirk, he disappeared back into the house with his sister trailing behind. As soon as the party resumed, Laker let me go. “What the hell, Kai? What are you playing at?”
But my gaze remained on the house.
And then everything went black.
DAIYA
When I arrived at school Friday morning, everyone had heard about the Devil’s win. Of course, I already knew from Poppy. She hadn’t attended on principle—something about supporting her best friend—but she was a fan, and it hadn’t taken her long to find out the score. But that wasn’t the only thing she’d heard.
“Are you okay?” she asked me for the third time since we arrived.
“Fine.”
“Geez, could you at least try to fake it?” Poppy linked her arm through mine, yanking me down the hallway. “Bitch alert.”
My gaze landed on Tamara, and I inwardly sighed. “Oh god, she’s coming over here.”
Her smirk widened, making her whole expression appear deformed. “Daiya, Poppy.” Her voice dripped with smugness. “I didn’t see you at the game last night or the party at Laker’s.”
Poppy tensed beside me, and I squeezed her arm in mine. Since things had cooled between Kai and me, things had cooled between her and Laker. She hadn’t said anything, but I could tell she felt dejected.
“We had a thing,” I said, wanting to get this over with.
“A thing, riiight. Don’t worry; I kept Kai company. It was like he didn’t miss you at all.” Tamara flashed me a smile that ignited the demon, and I felt my teeth grind together. She had to know I’d already heard about the party. About people seeing her leave Laker’s pool house with Kai. Pain tightened in my chest. I didn’t want to believe the rumors—I didn’t believe them—but it had been five days, and Kai still wouldn’t talk to me. He wouldn’t even look at me. And Tamara wanted him; she always had.
“I think you have something right there.” Poppy leaned forward and pointed at Tamara’s face. “Gross, what is that?”
Her hand shot up to her face, the stain of embarrassment on her cheeks. “I- hmm, I have to go.”
“Yeah, you do,” Poppy stifled a laugh until Tamara hurried away toward the restrooms. “Thank god, she is such a bitch.”
“You’re so bad,” I said, trying to ignore Tamara’s words and focusing instead on the amusement in Poppy’s voice. I had to keep calm. The demon was becoming harder to silence. Just when I thought it had settled, I felt it—the pull. The sharp tug deep inside that made me turn on my heels. Kai’s eyes met mine across the hallway, and time stopped. Mine, the demon roared with such force I gasped, my hand shooting to my stomach.
“Daiya?” Poppy’s voice filtered through my trance, but I still couldn’t tear my gaze away. Recognition flashed in Kai’s eyes. Longing. And I knew my eyes mirrored his, but then his lips pulled into a flat line, and his eyebrows bunched together, and he was gone. My Kai was no longer there, but for a split second, I’d seen him. Felt him.
“Come on, let’s get to class.” A hand yanked my arm, and reluctantly, I went.
What else could I do?
“Hey, Daiya, right?” An unfamiliar guy smiled at me like we were old friends. Why did suddenly being the girl dumped by one of Decker County’s most popular guys give me celebrity status?
“Hmm, yeah,” I said peeking around his broad shoulders to look for Poppy or anyone who could save me from the imminent awkwardness. It had been the same in my last two classes. Two guys had tried to talk to me. I just wanted people to leave me alone, but I knew where this conversation was heading.
“I’m Dan.”
“Hi, Dan.” I smiled but not too much. I didn’t need him to think he stood a chance.
“So I heard you and Stanton broke up and wondered if—” Something caught his eye, and the color drained from his face. “Hmm, nothing, it doesn’t matter. See you around, Daiya.”
I turned slowly and inhaled deeply at the sight before me. Kai l
ooked different. The dark circles around his eyes detracted from his usual beautiful face. He looked tired, and I instinctually reached out for him. But when he grimaced, I snatched my hand back and pressed it into my thigh.
“What did he want?” He nodded over my shoulder.
“Who?”
“Don’t play stupid, Daiya.” His voice was cold. “Dan King is a jerk. What did he want?”
My heart pounded in my chest. Kai was here, and he was talking to me. But something was wrong. Very wrong.
“Kai, can we talk, please?” I pleaded, trying to keep my voice low to avoid creating a scene. He crowded me into the lockers but avoided touching me. “What. Did. He. Want?”
Something snapped, and I rolled back my shoulders, flattening myself against the lockers. My eyes glowered at him. “He wanted to ask me out now that I’m available. I am available, aren’t I, Kai?” The demon challenged him. I tried to regain control, tried to rein it in, but it was responding to something in Kai.
He narrowed his eyes as the rise and fall of his chest quickened. But the demon wasn’t done. It commanded me forward until Kai had no choice to back up. “Did you sleep with her?”
His face blanched, but he quickly schooled his features. “W-what?”
“Tamara. Did. You. Sleep. With. Her?”
Where was this coming from? I had heard rumors, but nothing that suggested he had actually done anything with Tamara. Deep down, I knew he wouldn’t. Even though he was hurting, he would never do something like that to me just to hurt me back.
“You think I slept with her?” Kai’s voice softened just a fraction, and I wanted to take the words back, to apologize and fix things between us, but the demon had me suspended in stasis.
“Did you?” It came out a low growl and surprise flashed across his face.
“Daiya, I would never … I don’t know what’s happening. I feel …” A long sigh escaped his lips. “I’m not sleeping, and things don’t make any sense. I don’t know what to believe anymore.” He dragged a hand over his face, and I wanted nothing more than to fix things. If only I knew how.
