I recognized that lulling, cajoling voice, so much like Revik’s.
I felt pulling fingers of light, that cord in my belly, which made it harder for me to remain by the wall. The screaming rose louder, bringing a sharp, blinding pain behind my eyes, but the murmurs got into my head, trying to talk me into letting Cass go, letting Revik go, letting Feigran go, letting all of them go, coming with them.
I’d already wrapped my light into Revik’s, almost without knowing I did it. I held him in place even as I yanked Cass back, splitting my light enough to grip both of them tightly, as if my life depended on it.
With a third piece of my light, I held Feigran against the rock wall.
Revik recovered first, almost the instant he felt my light in his.
I felt him recognize some element of what was happening.
Once he knew I had him, his light flared out, aiming for the door itself, the aura of cold blue and green light. I felt him struggle with whatever presence lived behind that door.
Immediately, pulling Cass became easier.
Holding Revik’s body in place became easier, too. I yanked him closer to me as well, pulling him across the stone floor so that he sprawled not far from where I stood.
The pain in my head receded slightly, well enough that I could think.
I could feel Revik struggling. I could feel him in pain. He’d helped us both by distracting whatever had been resisting me, whatever had been pulling Cass towards that open, organic-lined door. Now he was gasping, blind, his head exploding in pain.
Splitting my consciousness a fourth time once I had Cass right by my feet and closer to the rest of us, I pinged Stanley, Illeg, Dalai, Holo.
Catch her! Don’t let go of her! Tie her to the fucking cave wall if you have to. Do the same with Revik, if you can. Don’t let either of them anywhere near that opening in the rock.
I didn’t wait for their answer.
Pulling most of my light off Cass, I focused on Revik.
He was still kneeling on the stone, not far from where Illeg and Holo practically pinned Balidor and Cass to the floor.
Blood ran down Revik’s face from his nose.
He let out a pained gasp, relaxing some of his concentration once I was helping him. Pain rose sharply in my head and neck, throbbing my temples and the back of my skull. Even so, I felt nothing but relief when I felt Revik’s gratitude.
It struck me that he’d been barely holding on.
Now that I was helping him, his structures snapped back, enfolding mine, reinforcing both of ours. Before I could take a breath, Cass’s aleimi wove into Revik’s and my light, too. I’d barely taken a breath when I felt Feigran’s light there next, strengthening the mandala of light still forming over all of our heads.
Cass’s telekinetic structures ignited above her head then, like a gas flame.
Within seconds, less than seconds, the spigot turned back on for my light. I’d barely noticed how drained I’d gotten again; now, light flooded every part of my aleimi.
Letting out a gasp, I slammed my light out and into that opening in the cave wall.
The beings released Revik totally that time, making him gasp aloud, right before he fell backwards, landing on his palms behind where he knelt on the stone.
Once he was free, I pulled down even more light, using everything I could find, every source I could feel anywhere near the four of us.
Once I had it, I hit out at the living being in that cave. I didn’t hold back.
I didn’t hold back at all.
Using the light drawn down by all four of us, I slammed it out of me as hard as I could, aiming for that pulsing, breathing opening in the rock. I threw more of myself behind it than I had when fighting Dragon. I threw more of myself behind it than I knew I had.
I hit it hard. Too hard, maybe.
The screaming grew louder, more filled with pain.
There was a bright flash…
Then a strange, telescoping feeling overcame my light, like falling into a black hole. It felt almost like when I operated the telekinesis, but it wasn’t that feeling, not exactly. It was familiar, though. It was so familiar. My light opened in reflex, surrendering to it, surrendering to the feeling behind it without hesitation, without thought.
At the same time, the power behind it terrified me.
It was fading though. Whatever I’d done, it didn’t last. I already felt that telescoping feeling snapping back. It hit me that the influx of light created it somehow. All that light started it, but there wasn’t enough light to sustain it.
The opening was already closing.
It was already narrowing, telescoping back in the other direction.
I threw up a shield, wrapping my light first around Revik, protecting him instinctively in white and gold light before I expanded that shield to cover Cass and Feigran, then the rest of our group. I kept my light split, watching the door as I tried to decide if I should hit it again with our combined light, or if that would only put us in danger.
My body was still bent in half, but now my fist rested on the stone. I hovered over Cass, my light thrown over Revik and Feigran in a dense, white-gold net, infused with those symbols and multi-dimensional geometric shapes.
I felt like a wolf mother crouched over her pups, snarling.
It was ending though. I could feel it. As that glow reached a blinding glare, the pain in my head was already starting to recede.
The door continued to close, emitting clouds of dispersing light.
That heavy construct I’d felt since I first walked into the cave began to dissipate, allowing me to think more or less clearly again.
I could also see again, as that light faded.
I glanced at Revik first.
Then I turned my head, looking for Feigran. My light flickered back, checking a second time on Cass and Revik, then back to Feigran, then back to Revik, then Cass. Whatever had gripped our lights and bodies had let us go.
Exhaling, only then did I turn to the rest of our group.
“Is everyone okay?” I said.
Everyone looked up and back at me, as if I’d woken them from a trance. Seeing my face, they nodded, everyone but Revik, who was still wiping his face, gasping in pain.
Frowning in his direction, I looked back at everyone else.
“Any suggestions?” I said, still speaking loud, my voice sharp.
No one answered. I realized everyone in our group was in shock. Some of them stared at me blankly while others went back to staring at the crevice in the rock wall, at the blue and green flames, the pulsing, breathing opening in the rock.
Slowly, that light was beginning to dim, and to retract.
Slowly, the glowing aura around the doorway began to fade.
I saw the aura flicker, pulsing brighter and darker as it seemed to be shorting out. I watched the skin of the organic machine pulse like the last beats of a dying heart.
Even more disturbing, I watched the dark green of the metal opening begin to change color.
The dark green began to leach out of it. The metal surface grew strangely lighter, going from forest green to a bright, lawn green, to pale, new-leaf green. It continued to lighten as I watched, losing color altogether as the metal grew more and more inert.
Whatever had been there, whatever that presence was, I felt it going.
They were leaving. Maybe they were already gone.
The screaming I’d heard, the murmuring, groaning, coaxing, seducing, it was all receding into the darkness. The whispered promises and threats, their attempts to reason with me, to get me to give up Cass and the others, all of that withdrew. I felt the presence grow smaller as it disappeared down what looked like a long, multi-branched matrix of light.
I watched that light flicker and pulse, growing dimmer.
I felt the light get pulled in behind them as they left.
Before I could make sense of any of it, everything in that wall went silent.
Every other sound in the cave grew shocki
ngly loud. I heard my lungs gasping, my heart beat thudding in my chest. I felt sweat on my skin, pain in my hands where they rested on the stone, a throb in my arms and legs from how much I’d been clenching my muscles.
Holo held my wrist in one hand. Half crouched in front of me, he held Cass’s arm in the other. He was gasping, too, sweating despite the cold air.
Balidor held Cass, his hair sweated to the back of his neck, his arms trembling. Illeg and Dalai held both him and Cass, nearly sitting on them. Revik was still half-sprawled on the stone floor, breathing hard, but now he was wiping the blood from his face and nose, fighting to get back up to a kneeling position, probably so he could pull himself to his feet.
Stanley stood just behind Feigran, holding his shoulder and staring at the now-dark opening in the rock. His heart was beating so loudly I swear I could hear it all the way across the cave. He stood eerily still, his expression frozen, as if he couldn’t believe what he’d just seen, what just happened to all of us.
Illeg and Dalai were now feeling over Cass and Balidor, as if to make sure they were really there, that they were real, that they wouldn’t get pulled back towards the door. Dalai gripped Cass’s leg in one hand without letting go, while Illeg held her shoulder, kneeling in front of me as if trying to shield and hold both of us at once.
“Is everyone okay?” I repeated. “Is everyone all right?”
No one answered me.
No one even looked at me that time.
Balidor was stroking Cass’s face, relief in his eyes and expression, his blurred irises telling me they were speaking to one another through the Barrier. While I watched, he caressed her hair tenderly out of her eyes, kissing her cheek, leaning his sweaty forehead against hers in a relief I could feel, even from where I crouched.
It only occurred to me then that Cass gripped my ankle in one hand.
She held it tightly, even now––even as she smiled at Balidor, raising her other hand to touch his face in return before kissing him on the mouth. I looked away when they deepened the kiss, conscious suddenly that I was staring, without even noticing I’d been doing it.
Gazing around the small, now-quiet and dimly-lit cave, it hit me for the first time that we were missing someone.
“Where’s Varlan?” I said.
My words came out sharp, strained in the hollow acoustics of the cave.
“Where’s brother Varlan?” I repeated, louder. “Why isn’t he here?”
Again, no one spoke.
Only Feigran turned, looking away from the now dead-feeling door.
Without a word, he pointed into the opening in the wall.
34
THE SILVER WOMB
WE WERE BACK on the raft.
I sat next to Revik, crammed in with everyone else, but this time, he wasn’t one of the seers manning the rope. Neither was I.
He held my arm, seemingly unwilling to let go of me, even for a few seconds at a time. Despite that, I did my best to use water from the lake and part of my shirt to wipe the last of the blood off his face and neck.
I was having trouble not touching him, too.
Now that my light wasn’t in full blown panic mode with trying to protect him and everyone else in our small group, a part of me wanted to reassure myself he was all right, that there was nothing wrong with him.
That same part wanted to take off all his clothes, to look at him, but I knew my impulses there were pretty confused, to say the least.
They were also mixing badly with a number of other factors right then, like the fact we’d almost died, and near-death experiences tended to make seers want to share light, even at the best of times. It made them want to open their light, touch, share affection, fuck––even seers who weren’t currently having issues in that area.
I tried to focus on keeping us alive, instead.
We’d more than half-expected to have company by now. We’d come back into the main cavern with our two working guns raised, in a military-style deployment.
Revik led us in that.
Even so, Cass, Balidor and I were right behind him.
My light still felt pretty much on high alert, and I could tell Revik’s was, too. Even now, he stared out over the water while I cleaned off his skin, his pale eyes lit faintly from within as he scanned every inch of the cavern.
I knew our team was still more or less in shock, and not only the four of us who almost got pulled into that organic opening in the rock.
After everything died down, and once it was clear the door and the organic machine was neutralized, the whole team turned briefly into a panicked mess.
The urgency to get the fuck out of there––but also to find Varlan, to determine what happened to him, clashed and confused everyone.
We’d been sure Myther soldiers would be upon us any second.
Balidor, Illeg and Dalai looked for any indications of gas in the cave, for Barrier fields and constructs, for surveillance cameras, for OBE fields, anything that might pose a threat or trap us inside. The fact that we found nothing didn’t really assure any of us.
It only made the urgency to get the hell out that much stronger.
The realization that if we were captured, they wouldn’t hold us hostage but just put a bullet in our brains, didn’t help.
Nor did it help to remember that if we were gone––meaning me, Revik, Cass and Feigran––every living being on Earth was likely dead, or enslaved by the Dreng, and we likely would have unleashed the Dreng on countless other worlds.
Something about seeing that door in action brought the point home for me in a way I hadn’t felt it until now. Maybe for the first time since Revik pulled me out of San Francisco, I was actively worried about my life now.
I was terrified at what would happen if I died… if Revik died.
Once I’d calmed down enough to retract the shield, I’d disentangled my ankle from Cass’s grip and crossed the floor to where Revik half-knelt on the stone floor. He’d had his head tilted back, still gasping as he used his shirt and hand to try and stop his nose from bleeding.
That was probably thirty minutes ago now.
Apart from my hyper-protectiveness over Revik, I was cold, hungry, borderline angry, and exhausted. I felt drained of light.
More than any of that, I wanted out of there.
I didn’t just want out of those underground caverns, or Rome, or even Italy––I wanted out of Europe and Asia altogether.
I had no rational reason left for thinking of America this way, but I still did, in some more primal part of my psyche: I wanted to go home.
I wanted to go the fuck home, back to the land of the United States, even if the United States itself wasn’t there anymore. Maybe it was because most of our people were there already––Jon, Wreg, Lily, Tarsi, my parents, Maygar, Vikram, Loki, Dante, Yumi. Maybe it had more to do with the place itself, with knowing the end was coming and wanting to be on familiar soil, looking at land that still held some sway over me.
I knew the feeling wasn’t rational.
For the same reason, I didn’t bother to voice it aloud.
Varlan was gone. I had to focus on that first.
We all knew somehow, he wasn’t coming back. None of us wanted to voice that aloud, either, but I felt it on every seer in that cave.
Even so, just walking away from it and from him wasn’t easy.
I didn’t know Varlan all that well, but he’d been with us for more than a year. He’d become one of us, an integral part of our twisted, dysfunctional family. I couldn’t help wondering how Feigran would adjust to his “friend” being gone, too––if it would even register in that oddly-structured mind of his.
Varlan was also one of our best infiltrators.
His name had been on the List.
Cass, Revik and I voted to go inside the crevice as soon as we noticed him missing.
The others were less enthusiastic.
Balidor wanted to leave at once.
He reminded us the organic had been a c
omputer, despite the insane amount of living material and light it contained. He pointed out the likelihood of it being tied into the Mythers’ security system in some way––and if so, the likelihood that they already knew we were here. The fact that we’d apparently “broken” their pet machine didn’t make us safer in Balidor’s eyes; it meant alarms were likely going off in every security station aboveground.
He had a good point.
The truth was, no matter what we did now, we were risking a full-blown telekinetic battle under the city of Rome to fight our way out.
But the damned thing took Varlan. It almost got Cass, and Revik… and me.
I wasn’t about to walk away without at least getting a look at it.
Holo, Stanley and Illeg complained loudly in support of Balidor’s position.
Dalai didn’t say much, but she stayed by the rock wall with the others, as far from the opening in the cave wall as she could get.
In the end, Feigran wandered into that opening before we’d finished arguing, seemingly oblivious to the discussion the rest of us were having. Watching the intermediary saunter inside that dead-feeling crevice, hands in his pockets, eyes on the metal walls, Cass, Revik, Balidor, and I exchanged looks.
Then, without another word, we followed him.
Holo and Stanley never left the opposite wall.
Dalai and Illeg opted to remain outside too, but they stood with their two working guns raised, aimed at the opening while we went inside. I wasn’t totally clear what they thought there was to shoot, apart from us, but I appreciated the gesture.
In any case, it was all for nothing.
The cave was empty.
Not only was it empty, it was completely dead inside. All that remained was a featureless room with silver walls of obviously dead-metal.
“They were green before,” Balidor muttered, looking around us. “They were dark green… I’d never seen so much organic matter in a machine. I’d never felt one so alive.” Glancing back at me and Revik, he frowned. “I didn’t imagine that, did I?”
I watched him frown around at the mirrored pane of unbroken metal.
He gripped Cass’s hand, white-knuckled, as if still worried something might pull her out of his grasp. I tried not to notice that, or the way she leaned on him, wrapping both of her hands around that one of his, as if to reassure him.
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