The Red Letter Plays
Page 3
Trouble goes back to sleepwalking and goes inside.
Hester
Bully. Go over there. Close yr eyes and yr mouth and not a word, hear?
Bully goes a distance off curling up to sleep without a word.
Hester
I used to wash Troubles mouth out with soap when he used bad words. Found out he likes the taste of soap. Sometimes you cant win. No matter what you do.
(Rest)
Im gonna talk to Welfare and get an upgrade. The worldll take care of the women and children.
Amiga Gringa
Theyre gonna give you the test. See what skills you got. Make you write stuff.
Hester
Like what?
Amiga Gringa
Like yr name.
Hester
I can write my damn name. Im not such a fool that I cant write my own goddamn name. I can write my goddamn name.
Inside, Baby starts crying.
Hester
HUSH!
Baby hushes.
Amiga Gringa
You should pay yrself a visit to Babys daddy. Dont take along the kid in the flesh thatll be too much. For a buck I’ll get someone to take a snapshot.
Jabber comes in. He wears mismatched pajamas.
He doesnt come too close, keeps his distance.
Jabber
I was in a rowboat and the sea was flat like a blue plate and you was rowing me and it was fun.
Hester
Go back to bed.
Jabber
It was a good day but then Bad News and the sea started rolling and the boat tipped and I fell out and—
Hester
You wet the bed.
Jabber
I fell out the boat.
Hester
You wet the bed.
Jabber
I wet the bed.
Hester
13 years old still peeing in the bed.
Jabber
It was uh accident.
Hester
Whats wrong with you?
Jabber
Accidents happen.
Hester
Yeah you should know cause yr uh damn accident. Shit. Take that off.
Jabber strips.
Amiga Gringa
He aint bad looking, Hester. A little slow, but some women like that.
Hester
Wear my coat. Gimmie a kiss.
Jabber puts on Hesters coat and kisses her on the cheek.
Jabber
Mommie?
Hester
Bed.
Jabber
All our daddys died, right? All our daddys died in the war, right?
Hester
Yeah, Jabber.
Jabber
They went to war and they died and you cried. They went to war and died but whered they go when they died?
Hester
They into other things now.
Jabber
Like what?
Hester
—. Worms. They all turned into worms, honey. They crawling around in the dirt happy as larks, eating the world up, never hungry. Go to bed.
Jabber goes in.
(Rest)
Amiga Gringa
Worms?
Hester
Whatever.
Amiga Gringa
Hes yr favorite. You like him the best.
Hester
Hes my first.
Amiga Gringa
Hes yr favorite.
Hester
I dont got no favorite.
(Rest)
5 bucks. 3 for their treats. And one for that photo. Reverend D. aint the man I knew. Hes got money now. A salvation business and all. Maybe his stone-heart is mush, though. Maybe.
Amiga Gringa
Cant hurt to try.
SCENE 2
Street Practice
Hester walks alone down the street. She has a framed picture of Baby.
Hester
Picture, it comed out pretty good. Got him sitting on a chair, and dont he look like he got everything one could want in life? Hes 2 years old. Andll be growd up with a life of his own before I blink.
(Rest)
Picture comed out good. Thought Amiga was cheating me but it comed out good.
Hester meets the Doctor, coming the other way.
As before he carries all of his office paraphernalia on his back. He wears a sandwich board, the words written on it are hidden.
Doctor
Hester. Dont move a muscle, I’ll be set up in a jiffy.
Hester
I dont got more than a minute.
Doctor
Hows yr gut?
Hester
Not great.
Doctor
Say “Aaaah!”
Hester
Aaaah!
As Hester stands there with her mouth open, he sets up his roadside office: a thin curtain, his doctors shingle, his instruments, his black bag.
Doctor
Good good good good good. Lets take yr temperature. Do you know what it takes to keep my road-side practice running? Do you know how much The Higher Ups would like to shut me down? Every blemish on your record is a blemish on mine. Take yr guts for instance. Yr pain could be nothing or it could be the end of the road—a cyst or a tumor, a lump or a virus or an infected sore. Or cancer, Hester. Undetected. There youd be, lying in yr coffin with all yr little ones gathered around motherlessly weeping and The Higher Ups pointing their fingers at me, saying I should of saved the day, but instead stood idly by. You and yr children live as you please and Im the one The Higher Ups hold responsible. Would you like a pill?
Hester
No thanks.
Hester doubles over in pain.
Hester
My gut hurts.
The Doctor takes a pill.
Doctor
In a minute. We’ll get to that in a minute. How are yr children?
Hester
Theyre all right.
Doctor
All 5?
Hester
All 5.
Doctor
Havent had any more have you?
Hester
No.
Doctor
But you could. But you might.
Hester
—Maybe.
Doctor
Word from The Higher Ups is that one more kid outa the likes of you and theyre on the likes of me like white on rice. I’d like to propose something—. Yr running a temperature. Bit of a fever. Whats this?
Hester
Its a club. For protection.
Doctor
Good thinking.
The Doctor examines her quickly and thoroughly.
Doctor
The Higher Ups are breathing down my back, Hester. They want answers! They want results! Solutions! Solutions! Solutions! Thats what they want.
He goes to take another pill, but doesnt.
Doctor
I only take one a day. I only allow myself one a day.
(Rest)
He goes back to examining her.
Doctor
Breathe in deep. Lungs are clear. Yr heart sounds good. Strong as an ox.
Hester
This falls been cold. The wind under the bridge is colder than the wind on the streets.
Doctor
Exercise. Thats what I suggest. When the temperature drops, I run in place. Hold yr hands out. Shaky. Experiencing any stress and tension?
Hester
Not really.
Doctor
Howre yr meals?
Hester
The kids come first.
Doctor
Course they do. Howre yr bowels. Regular?
Hester
I dunno.
Doctor
Once a day?
Hester
Sometimes. My gut—
Doctor
In a minute. Gimmie the Spread & Squat right quick. Lets have a look under the hood.
S
tanding, Hester spreads her legs and squats.
Like an otter, he slides between her legs on a dolly and looks up into her privates with a flashlight.
Doctor
Last sexual encounter?
Hester
Thats been a while, now.
Doctor
Yve healed up well from yr last birth.
Hester
Its been 2 years. His names Baby.
Doctor
Any pain, swelling, off-color discharge, strange smells?
Hester
No.
Doctor
L.M.P.?
Hester
About a week ago.
(Rest)
How you been feeling, Doc?
Doctor
Sometimes Im up, sometimes Im down.
Hester
You said you was lonesome once. I came for a checkup and you said you was lonesome. You lonesome today, Doc?
Doctor
No.
Hester
Oh.
Far away, Chilli walks by with his picnic basket on his arm.
He pauses, checks his pocket watch, then continues on.
Doctor
Yr intelligent. Attractive enough. You could of made something of yrself.
Hester
Im doing all right.
Doctor
The Higher Ups say yr in a skid. I agree.
Hester
Oh, I coulda been the Queen of Sheba, it just werent in the cards, Doc.
Doctor
Yr kids are 5 strikes against you.
Hester
I dont need no lecture. Gimmie something for my gut so I can go.
Doctor
The Higher Ups, they say Im not making an impact. But what do you care.
Hester
My gut—
Doctor
Stand right here.
The Doctor draws a line in the dirt, positions her behind it and walks a few steps away. He reveals the writing on his sandwich board. It is an eye exam chart.
The letters on the first line spell “SPAY.”
Doctor
Read.
Hester
—. A.
Doctor
Good.
He takes a step closer decreasing the distance between them.
Doctor
Read.
Hester
—. —. —.
(Rest)
I need glasses for that.
Doctor
Uh huhn.
He steps closer.
Doctor
How about now?
Hester
I need glasses I guess.
Doctor
I guess you do.
He steps even closer.
Hester
((somethin-somethin-A-somethin.))
(Rest)
I need glasses.
Doctor
You cant read this?
Hester
I gotta go.
Hester turns to go and he grabs her hand, holding her fast.
Doctor
When I say removal of your “womanly parts” do you know what parts Im talking about?
Hester
Yr gonna take my womans parts?
Doctor
My hands are tied. The Higher Ups are calling the shots now.
(Rest)
You have 5 healthy children, itll be for the best, considering.
Hester
My womans parts.
Doctor
Ive fowarded my recommendation to yr caseworker. Its out of my hands. Im sorry.
Hester
I gotta go.
But she doesnt move.
She stands there numbly.
Doctor
Yr gut. Lets have a listen.
He puts his ear to her stomach and listens.
Doctor
Growling hungry stomach. Heres a dollar. Go get yrself a sandwich.
Hester takes the money and goes.
Doctor
Doctor
Doctor
FIRST CONFESSION: THE DOCTOR
“Times Are Tough: What Can We Do?”
Doctor
Times are tough:
What can we do?
When I see a woman begging on the streets I guess I could
bring her in my house
sit her at my table
make her a member of my family, sure.
But there are hundreds and thousands of them
and my house cant hold them all.
Maybe we should all take in just one.
Except they wouldnt really fit.
They wouldnt really fit in with us.
Theres such a gulf between us. What can we do?
I am a man of the people, from way back my streetside practice
is a testement to that
so dont get me wrong
do not for a moment think that I am one of those people haters who does not understand who does not experience—compassion.
(Rest)
Shes been one of my neediest cases for several years now.
What can I do?
Each time she comes to me
looking more and more forlorn
and more and more in need
of affection.
At first I wouldnt touch her without gloves on, but then—
(Rest)
we did it once
in that alley there,
she was
phenomenal.
(Rest)
I was
lonesome and
she gave herself to me in a way that I had never experienced
even with women Ive paid
she was, like she was giving me something that was not hers to give me but something that was mine
that I’d lent her
and she was returning it to me.
Sucked me off for what seemed like hours
but I was very insistent. And held back
and she understood that I wanted her in the traditional way.
And she was very giving very motherly very obliging very understanding
very phenomenal.
Let me cumm inside her. Like I needed to.
What could I do?
I couldnt help it.
SCENE 3
The Reverend on His Soapbox
Late at night. The Reverend D.
on his soapbox preaching to no one in particular.
There are audio recordings of his sermons for sale.
Reverend D.
You all know me. You all know this face. These arms. These legs. This body of mine is known to you. To all of you. There isnt a person on the street tonight that hasnt passed me by at some point. Maybe when I was low, many years ago, with a bottle in my hand and the cold hard unforgiving pavement for my dwelling place. Perhaps you know me from that. Or perhaps you know me from my more recent incarnation. The man on the soapbox, telling you of a better life thats available to you, not after the demise of your physical being, not in some heaven where we all gonna be robed in satin sheets and wearing gossamer wings, but right here on earth, my friends. Right here right now. Let the man on the soapbox tell you how to pick yourself up. Let the man on the soapbox tell you how all yr dreams can come true. Let the man on the soapbox tell you that you dont have to be down and dirty, you dont have to be ripped off and renounced, you dont have to be black and blue, your neck dont have to be red, your clothes dont have to be torn, your head dont have to be hanging, you dont have to hate yourself, you dont have to hate yr neighbor. You can pull yrself up.
Hester comes in with a framed picture of Baby.
She stands a ways off. Reverend D. keeps on talking.
Reverend D.
And I am an example of that. I am a man who has crawled out of the quicksand of despair. I am a man who has pulled himself out of that never ending gutter—and you notice friends that every city and every towns got a gutter. Aint no place in the world that dont have some little trenc
h for its waste. And the gutter, is endless, and deep and wide and if you think you gonna crawl out of the gutter by crawling along the gutter you gonna be in the gutter for the rest of your life. You gotta step out of it, friends and I am here to tell you that you can.
(Rest)
He sees Hester but doesnt recognize her.
Reverend D.
What can I do for you tonight, my sister.
Hester
I been good.
Reverend D.
But yr life is weighing heavy on you tonight.
Hester
I havent bothered you.
Reverend D.
Reverend D. likes to be bothered. Reverend D. enjoys having the tired, the deprived and the depraved come knocking on his door. Come gathering around his soapbox. Come closer. Come on.
Hester holds the picture of Baby in front of her face, hiding her face from view.
Hester
This child here dont know his daddy.
Reverend D.
The ultimate disaster of modern times. Sweet child. Yours?
Hester
Yes.
Reverend D.
Do you know the father?
Hester
Yes.
Reverend D.
You must go to him and say, “Mister, here is your child!”
Hester
Mister here is your child!
Reverend D.
“You are wrong to deny what God has made!”
Hester
You are wrong to deny what God has made!
Reverend D.
“He has nothing but love for you and reaches out his hands every day crying wheres daddy?”
Hester
Wheres daddy?
Reverend D.
“Wont you answer those cries?”
Hester
Wont you answer those cries?
Reverend D.
If he dont respond to that then hes a good-for-nothing deadbeat, and you report him to the authorities. Theyll garnish his wages so at least you all wont starve. I have a motivational cassette which speaks to that very subject. I’ll give it to you free of charge.