The Red Letter Plays
Page 11
Second Hunter
Cause I bet you. I bet you that he wouldnt come down.
I place such a bet knowing Im an unlucky guy, and therefore knowing that I would more likely than not lose the bet and that me losing the bet would mean he was coming. Me betting you exerted a psychic pull on him.
Third Hunter
Hals bad luck works like a charm.
First Hunter
Im giving you yr money back.
Second Hunter
Yr all right, Hank.
Third Hunter
Whens the last time we did a runthrough? You cant remember, right? Cause its been years.
First Hunter
Its been years cause its lots of work.
Third Hunter
Its also a lot of fun.
Second Hunter
Whats a runthrough?
Third Hunter
The best thing to do to a convict when you catch him. It gets the loudest screams.
First Hunter
You get a hot iron rod and run it up his bottom and out his throat.
Third Hunter
Then you stick the rod in the ground and let him wiggle on the stick.
Second Hunter
Shit.
First Hunter
You wouldnt think they would wiggle for long but they do.
Third Hunter
And the screams—
Second Hunter
Im game to try if you all are.
Third Hunter
We’re gonna find him, I can feel it. And besides getting rich off the money he’ll make us, we’ll have some fun.
First Hunter
Say it come on say it.
Second Hunter
Monster!
Third Hunter
Monster!
Second/Third Hunters
Monster! MONSTER!
First Hunter
Come on lets get to work.
They go on their way.
SCENE 12
Hester waiting. She wears a shawl that conceals her A.
She looks at the sky and notes the time. She keeps waiting.
She opens the picnic basket, examines the contents, closes the basket. She primps. She waits.
She opens the basket, takes out a checked cloth and spreads it on the ground. She sits down on the cloth.
Practices “meeting” her son.
Hester
He sees me on the ground like this he may think I shrunk.
I’ll stand.
(Rest)
“Son!” Too eager.
(Rest)
“Son.” Not eager enough.
(Rest)
I look like Im waiting for a bus.
(Rest)
Kneeling. This is good. Kneeling in thanks. Put the past behind us and lets be thankful for this sunny picnic day—although he’ll think Ive lost my legs. I’ll stand.
Far far away, a Guard brings Jailbait out.
They stand together. The Guard wears a luncheon napkin at his chin and fills out paperwork on a clipboard.
Jailbait wears shackles on his feet.
Guard
Just stand here. I’ll take you to the picnic ground in a minute.
Jailbait
Wheres she at?
Guard
Just behind that fence there.
(Rest)
You should be happy. Shes yr mother.
Jailbait
What about my meal?
Guard
Shes bringing you a picnic. Real food. Yr lucky. I’ll come get you in an hour or so.
Jailbait
Yr leaving me?
Guard
Its lunchtime for us too.
Jailbait
You aint scared I’ll make a run for it?
Guard
Youre wearing a chain. So if you run you wont run far. Besides, yr moms visiting. And shes brought you a picnic.
Jailbait
I dont got no mom.
Guard
Sure you do. Everybodys got a mom. Even you.
The Guard walks Jailbait toward Hester.
Guard
Here he is, maam. Enjoy yrselves.
The Guard goes back inside.
She sees him and they stand still, staring at each other.
Hester
Jailbait
Hester
Jailbait
Hester
(Son.)
Jailbait
Hester
He just looks at her, doesnt move. She walks to him.
Hugs him gently then harder. He does not respond.
She bursts into tears.
Hester
Waaaaahhhhhhhhhh!
Jailbait
Jailbait
She cries for quite some time.
He stands there, mildly interested, mostly bored.
Hester
Its you.
Jailbait
I guess.
Hester
My child my love my son its you.
She hugs him very hard.
With some difficulty, he struggles free.
Jailbait
They said you had food.
Hester
—Yes. I have food.
(Rest)
30 years. Well.
(Rest)
Lets see yr mark. The mark yr mother gave you all those years ago. People thought I was crazy. “I’ll know my Boy anywhere,” I said! Look at mine! See! My teeth marks! Yrs is identical! Lets see how it healed.
Jailbait
Dont touch me.
Hester
Jailbait
Hester
All these years locked up in this horrible place. “Dont touch me.” Of course.
(Rest)
((Im going to get you out soon. Ive got friends with gold. But youve got to help. You keep befriending those bad people theyll keep blaming things on you. Make nice friends, son. Promise me.))
Jailbait
Im hungry.
Hester
Of course yr hungry. See? A whole basket full of wonderful things. Lets see your arm. Just a peek.
Jailbait
Hands off.
Hester
Oh.
Jailbait
Can we eat, please?
(Rest)
Mother?
Hester
Waaaaaaah!
She cries again. He grabs the basket and begins eating. She collects herself.
Jailbait
I usually eat with my hands. Dya mind?
Hester
Not at all.
He eats like an animal.
Hester
Youve grown so much.
(Rest)
Yr such a man.
Jailbait
Hester
Jailbait
Thanks.
He goes back to eating.
Hester
Do I look old? Probably, right? But not too old I hope.
(Rest)
(Rest)
Lets see that mark I gave you. Just a quick look. I want to know what kind of scar its made. Take another look at mine. Kinda pretty, I think. I did them both in such a hurry but they turned out well. What do you think? Kind of looks like a heart. Like Im wearing my heart on my sleeve or something. Hahahahaha. Lemmie see yrs.
Jailbait
Quit grabbing at me!
Hester
Sorry.
(Rest)
Could I pet you, son?
Jailbait
Where?
Hester
On the head.
Jailbait
Go ahead.
She pets him very lightly on the head.
Jailbait
Yr looking at me like you wanna eat me up.
Hester
Motherlove.
Jailbait
Heavy.
(Rest)
What else you bring for me?
Hester
Cake.
Jailbait
Show.
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He takes the entire cake and eats.
Hester
Look what living here has done to you. Eating yr food with yr eyes scouring the countryside as if someones gonna rush up and snatch yr goodies! Like this!
She playfully snatches his food.
He fiercely grabs it back.
Hester
Jailbait
Hester
I brought wine.
Jailbait
Break em open.
She opens both bottles. He grabs them and gluts them down. Some of the wine makes it down his throat, some of it goes down his shirt.
Jailbait
You know whatd be great? Lemmie put my head in yr lap and you tell me a story. Thatd be great.
Hester
Ok. Once upon a time you were little and I was young and everything was nice.
Jailbait
And I wasnt bad?
Hester
You were never bad. They tell me yr bad but I dont believe them. You shouldnt believe them either.
(Rest)
Lets see yr mark.
She gingerly searches his forearm. He lets her.
Jailbait
You like looking at me dont you?
Hester
I thought I put it on the same arm I put mine on. Maybe I put it on the other. Its been a long time.
Jailbait
You smell good. You wearing perfume?
She goes to look at his other arm.
Hester
Im going to look at yr other arm, ok?
Jailbait
I wanna look at your other arm.
He rolls up her sleeve, bites her arm playfully. She laughs.
Hester
Stop that! Now what are you doing?
He is burying his face in her lap.
Hester
Yr tickling me, son. Son, what are you doing?
Jailbait
Im getting romantic. Yr picnic got me hot.
Hester
Stop that, son.
Jailbait
That son crap may turn you on, lady, but it kinda breaks the mood for me, if you know what I mean.
Hester
Dont touch me like that.
Jailbait
Yr not no virgin are you?
Hester
Stop it, baby.
Jailbait
I aint no baby, Mama, Im a full grown man.
Hester
Theyd lock you up for good if they came out here and saw you getting fresh with your own mother.
Jailbait
I love you.
Hester
Boy, stop that!
Jailbait
Boy? I aint Boy. My names Joe.
Hester
Jailbait
Hester
Yr not my son.
Jailbait
Sorry. His names—
Hester
Boy. His name is Boy. Boy Smith.
Jailbait
Funny name. I could say I never heard of him but I have.
(Rest)
(Rest)
Smashed his brains in myself. Hes dead.
(Rest)
I guess thats why they sent me to you in his place.
Hester
Dead.
Jailbait
Bad things happen. All the time. But hey, no use crying.
Hester
Hester
Hester
Jailbait
You gonna gimmie some or what?
Hester
Hester
Hester
Jailbait
The way I see it we got ourselves some minutes left. And I always had a thing for older women.
Jailbait kisses her and feels her up.
Hester, struck dumb with grief and disbelief, lets Jailbait do what he wants. He touches and gropes her and she sits there, flicking at his hands from time to time as if she were flicking at flies.
After a moment the action stops.
Hester sings “My Vengeance”:
Hester
The low on the ladder
The barrels rock bottom
Will reach up and strangle
The Rich then God rot them.
She’ll mourn the day
She crushed us underfoot.
Her Rich Girl wealth
Will not stop me from putting my mark on her
And it will equal what we’ve paid.
My vengence will show her
How a true mother is made.
Jailbait embraces her again and the rape continues.
PART TWO
SCENE 13
Monster and First Lady sitting on that same park bench.
Wanted posters of Monster hang all over the place.
Monster smokes.
First Lady
I didnt know you smoked.
Monster
First Lady
Monster
You got my note.
First Lady
Im here.
Monster
I guess you got it.
(Rest)
You knocked up?
First Lady
No.
Monster
You sure?
(Rest)
If yr knocked up its mine.
(Rest)
Keep it, okay? Something to remember me by.
First Lady
Im not—expecting.
Monster
Too bad.
(Rest)
Whats yr husband do?
First Lady
Nothing.
Monster
I seen yr house. Its a big house. Right in the middle of town.
He must do something.
First Lady
Hes in business.
Monster
I figured. A tycoon, right?
First Lady
Thats right. A tycoon.
Monster
I want some money.
First Lady
How much.
Monster
A lot. I wanna live in style. I dont see why I shouldnt, do you?
First Lady
How much.
Monster
5 thousand coins.
First Lady
How about 3—
Monster
How about 10. Thousand. 10 thousand.
(Rest)
Say its a deal. Come on. Agree. You cant con an ex-con.
First Lady
You were in prison.
Monster
Yeah.
First Lady
Oh.
Monster
Why you holding yr stomach. You knocked up?
First Lady
Im sick.
Monster
Sure you arent knocked up?
First Lady
Yr the one theyre all looking for. Yr the man on the loose, arent you?
Monster
You gonna snitch? You look like yr gonna snitch.
First Lady
Yr pictures all over town.
Monster
You ever snitch?
First Lady
(Rest)
No.
Monster
Good.
(Rest)
Hear the bells? Theyre ringing noon. The next time they ring 12 itll be midnight.
(Rest)
Bring me my money. 10 thousand coins. At midnight tonight.
First Lady
I’ll turn you in.
Monster
I’ll kill you first. Believe it.
First Lady
Monster
Monster
12 midnight tonight. Go on. Get going. You got a lot of diamond rings to sell, Im sure. Thats it, hold yr stomach.
I knocked you up, didnt I ? Didnt I?!
She hurries away.
SCENE 14
Oustide Hesters back door. Two women waiting.
Waiting Woman #1
Weh noonka Flowmeh. Weh pak Nah rum—
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Waiting Woman #2
Weh nim ohnio Zamen die sah “noonka schwang,” rum—
Waiting Woman #1
Weh nam laisah sah Zamen. Woah-ya priceypricey eeh Beardkum der dak Zamensah like-a-rug woah.
Waiting Woman #2
Tah humble.
Waiting Woman #1
Tah humble si.
(Rest)
Waiting Woman #2
Why dont she answer her bell?
Waiting Woman #1
Sign says “Closed.” Maybe she closed for good. Maybe she quit the business.
Waiting Woman #2
I dont blame her. Mrs. Smith! Hey! Hey in there! Hey! Hey!
First Lady enters fresh from her encounter with Monster. She is heavily veiled and holds her stomach.
Waiting Woman #1
Look.
Waiting Woman #2
Well. A rich lady. Lah-dee-dah.
Waiting Woman #1
Dont make fun.
(Rest)
Who is she you think?
Waiting Woman #2
Who knows.
(Rest)
Ya come to Hester Smith cause she’ll let you keep yr veil on and wont ask no questions, huh?
First Lady
Im here same as you.
Waiting Woman #1
Loverboys seed growing inside you, huh?
Waiting Woman #2
You got the guilties and needs to get rid of it before the husband finds out.
First Lady
Yes.
First Lady
First Lady
First Lady
(Rest)
First Lady
No. Not at all.
(Rest)
One seed is as good as another. And when the husband resembles the lover, he wont be none the wiser.
Waiting Woman #1
Smart thinking.
Waiting Woman #2
Real real smart thinking.
First Lady sings “My Little Enemy”:
First Lady
They say Fidelity
Is the most important thing