Is It Wrong to Try to Pick Up Girls in a Dungeon?, Vol. 9

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Is It Wrong to Try to Pick Up Girls in a Dungeon?, Vol. 9 Page 2

by Fujino Omori


  It’s hurt…No, it’s wounded.

  There are several places on its body caked in dried blood. I can see spots on its shoulders where scales have been violently ripped or broken off.

  Only weapons can make injuries like that. Likely, it was adventurers who attacked it. Whatever the case, the badly wounded vouivre is looking up at me in terror and desperately trying to put more distance between us. But its back is already up against a wall, and no amount of retreating will help.

  I can’t move.

  Monsters are the purveyors of death and destruction.

  One should never befriend them, and certainly not extend a helping hand for any reason.

  But I’m standing here, trapped in the vouivre’s gaze, peering into those amber eyes that definitely carry emotion. I can’t finish it off…Slowly, I back away.

  At an impasse, I decide that acting like I never saw it is the best option and then run away pathetically.

  Turning my back on the vouivre, I leave the place behind me.

  “……?”

  The human gone from her line of sight, the vouivre looked around with a mystified expression, tears still filling her eyes.

  The Dungeon was eerily silent. Frightened by what she might see, the girl glanced at her surroundings before slowly standing up.

  Placing both hands on the Dungeon wall to take some weight off her injured leg, she started hobbling along the passageway.

  Suddenly, with a thud—

  The sound of flapping wings descended behind the injured vouivre as a crimson bird appeared from a side tunnel branching off the passageway. The firebird was over two meders long from end to end, with narrow bloodshot eyes and a massive, gaping beak.

  The vouivre girl froze as she felt heat closing in on her from behind. The airborne creature had found its latest victim.

  As the firebird aimed at her a stream of fire more powerful than a hellhound could ever produce, she tried to kick off the ground with her slender legs, but it was too late.

  The flames dancing in the back of the firebird’s beak lit up the vouivre girl’s face, about to spew forth—

  “—Aghh!”

  —I brandish my Hestia Knife.

  I sprint and leap forward to attack, the blade carving a bright violet arc through the air before splitting the firebird in two.

  The disrupted fire attack breaks apart in midair like fireworks. Its magic stone is cleaved apart, so the firebird crumbles into ash, and its remains are blown away.

  The vouivre collapses to the ground beneath the cloud of sparks and smoldering soot as I land.

  …Damn it.

  Now I’ve done it.

  Staring at my Hestia Knife, which I’m holding in a reverse grip, I hunch over in despair.

  I couldn’t bring myself to take off after leaving this place behind, so I doubled back and watched the vouivre from a blind spot. Then I found myself dashing out of my hiding place once the firebird attacked.

  The horror on the monster’s face—no, “her” face—spurred my legs to move on their own.

  All alone in the heart of the Dungeon…

  After being attacked by adventurers, it only makes sense that she’s afraid of us now.

  But to be assaulted for no reason at all by her fellow monsters?

  Yes, I know thinking like this will only cause problems. The rational, levelheaded part of me keeps telling me to not do something so stupid. But my hands already went ahead and did it anyway.

  I grip my bangs with my free left hand, clenching my hair as I walk toward the stunned vouivre.

  She’s in pretty much the same position as before, looking up at me.

  Trembling with fear and confusion, she gazes my way as if clinging to the faintest ray of hope. I let go of my hair and slowly lower my hand with all sorts of thoughts running through my mind—and then I smile weakly at her.

  I can’t do it.

  No matter what happens.

  I can’t kill her.

  “—It’s okay. Don’t be scared.”

  I kneel beside her so that our eyes are on the same level. Then I relax my face and smile again.

  Her eyes open a little wider, almost as if she understands what I said.

  Even tamers, who bend monsters to their will using a combination of strength and pain, would never do something this downright stupid. Growing increasingly reckless, I examine more closely the various injuries covering her body.

  Her shoulders are in terrible shape, and her broken leg is hideous. I reach into my leg holster and take out a Dual Potion made by Miach Familia.

  The vial containing unknown liquid in my hand must’ve startled her, because her whole body flinches when she sees it.

  “Nothing to worry about. This is called a potion—”

  “Po…tion…?”

  —She spoke.

  I don’t know how many times common sense has been obliterated today, but this one tops everything. Her voice is still ringing in my ears.

  I was simply speaking to her about what I was doing to soothe her nerves, not expecting a response. Now I’m frozen in place, and a dry, empty laugh escapes from my mouth.

  At any rate, I open the vial and wonder if potions have any effect on monsters at all as I pour it over her shoulders. Relief swells in my chest as I watch her open wounds begin closing beneath the dried blood. She, on the other hand, seems surprised.

  High potions can mend a broken bone, but…apparently they can force it to heal at the wrong angle if it isn’t set properly. The same is true for other healing items and magic—they can cause permanent damage when used without proper preliminary treatment. While I have no idea how to deal with injuries the “right” way, I tear off a piece of salamander wool for a bandage and wrap it around her leg using my knife’s sheath as a splint.

  “……”

  “……”

  I pour the remainder of the potion over the rest of her injured body while kneeling beside her. Now that the vial is empty, the two of us stare at each other in silence.

  The long silver-blue-haired girl seems to be flustered. Holding her hands together in front of her chest, her surprisingly clear amber eyes quiver while her delicate mouth opens and closes every few moments.

  As I do my best to ignore the heat building in my cheeks and keep my eyes off her completely exposed breasts, I know there’s something different about her.

  I encountered harpies when I was stranded in the Beor Mountains not too long ago—they looked human, too, but also hideous. Those creatures were definitely monsters. But this girl—she looks so much like us, and the mysterious air around her is completely different from the harpies’.

  A strange monster…A strange girl.

  Something catches in my throat as I try to comprehend the being that’s somewhere between person and monster sitting in front of me.

  “—Keep looking! It can’t have gotten far!”

  Human voices.

  Rough, angry shouts echo down the passageway toward us.

  The vouivre girl shrinks in fear. The trembling that had all but stopped comes back with a vengeance.

  Terror fills her eyes as the footsteps draw closer to us. I don’t say a word as I take off my salamander-wool robe and fling it over her shoulders.

  I just finish hiding all her bluish-white skin beneath it as several heavily armed adventurers turn the corner.

  “Hey, you there! Did you see a vouivre girl pass by?”

  A group of four men and women rush up behind me with the leader yelling at the top of his lungs. I stay facing the Dungeon wall.

  I’ve got a bad feeling about this.

  It’s not difficult to guess their relationship with the vouivre girl. If I don’t protect her now, then…

  I can tell they’re already suspiciously glaring at the girl hiding beneath my robe. Taking hold of the small, trembling hand beneath the red fabric, I desperately rack my brain for a solution.

  Time slows to a crawl. I can hear the agitation in thei
r voices and feel beads of sweat dripping down my face. Glancing down—I see the empty vial still clutched in my grasp. That’s it!

  It’s risky. I just hope my acting skills are up for the task.

  “Forget about that, do you have any potions on you? She’s been hit by a firebird and got burned bad, real bad!”

  Fixing my gaze on the form against the wall, I put as much panic in my voice as I can.

  The empty vial, the shaking body beneath salamander wool, the singed ground and foliage left over from the firebird explosion—everything here tells the story. Their eyes shift to me, narrowing.

  My desperation must be doing the trick, because they sneer at me before turning on their heels. They don’t want to get involved with my problem and are much more interested in tracking down a rare monster. The adventurers sprint away.

  Once I’m sure they’re gone for good…I let my shoulders relax.

  “W-we should be okay now…”

  I whisper to the trembling robed figure, and she timidly pokes her head out from the fabric.

  I’m sure that never in her wildest dreams did she expect an adventurer to heal her rather than deliver the killing blow, let alone protect her from other adventurers.

  I saved a monster—how would I react if I saw someone else do that?

  …No, I don’t want to think about it.

  I can’t help but sigh as the vouivre girl still shivers in fear of the adventurers, even though they’re gone.

  “Um…Can you walk?”

  I stand up and offer her my hand.

  Staying here only puts her at risk of being found by…well, anything. Those adventurers could double back, and she’d die a pointless death.

  She looks at my outstretched hand and then up to my eyes…then nods slightly.

  Her trembling hand reaches out and comes to rest on my palm. It’s cold, surprisingly so. I curl my fingers around it and gently pull her to her feet.

  She’s probably about 150 celch tall. After making sure she’s completely hidden by the salamander-wool robe, I pull her arm over my shoulder as we take our first steps.

  Sounds like there’s a battle over there…Okay, we’ll head this way for now and figure out what to do next on the way…

  Now that I’m separated from my assigned group, I have no idea how to get back to the entrance.

  There’s no choice but to follow my ears back to what I hope are other adventurers on the same quest, fighting firebirds along the main route. After that, it’ll all be a matter of following the map that Lilly practically jammed into my pocket before I left. My only hope is to find the landmarks on the map, follow them out, and avoid being seen as much as possible.

  Hoping that we don’t encounter any truly ferocious monsters on the way, I support my injured companion so she doesn’t have to put any weight on her broken leg. If worse comes to worst, I’ll pick her up with both arms and book it.

  “…”

  The strange girl-monster hunted by both man and beast watches silently as I ward off bugbears and mad beetles blocking our path with my Swift-Strike Magic, Firebolt.

  Her moist eyes glisten. “Khaa…” She’s sobbing, I think.

  She turns toward me a few moments later, burying her face between my neck and shoulder. A little nose presses against me, and I can feel her warm breath on my chest. I know I’m in the Dungeon and losing focus is a one-way ticket to the grave—but my cheeks are on fire.

  So delicate…and soft.

  Even if she does have the body of a normal girl, getting hot under the collar in a situation like this is a failure as a man and an adventurer.

  Did I save the vouivre because she’s pretty? Was it her appearance that made me extend a helping hand? If that’s the case, I’m already beyond help.

  What would Gramps, the one who always told me to save damsels in distress, say if he saw me now? Would he praise me?

  …I have an inkling that this is the one time he’d groan.

  I’ve gone far off the deep end, doing what I just did.

  Saving a monster.

  Then she whispers:

  “……Thank you.”

  Needing a moment to get over this new surprise, I look down at her. She gazes back up at me with tears in her eyes.

  Her head is slightly tilted beneath the robe’s dark-red hood. In that moment, I feel something that can’t be put into words—a warmth that only people can share.

  How do I respond? Should I respond? An endless string of thoughts races through my head as she watches me uneasily.

  Her pure, childlike innocence makes all the contradictory feelings melt away. I force a smile.

  “It’ll be okay.”

  I give her another smile to try to put her at ease, and she returns the gesture with a tiny one of her own.

  She closes her eyes and presses her body against me again, and I wrap my arms around her.

  My mind is made up. I’ll protect this girl who can smile like the rest of us.

  There’s only one problem…How am I going to explain this to Lilly and the others?

  It took a while, but we found our way back to the main route on the nineteenth floor.

  Guided by the simple map in my hand, we hid from adventurers and monsters at every turn until we spotted the light from the eighteenth floor’s crystal ceiling. At last, the exit.

  “—It is true! A monster spoke to me!!”

  “Why do you not believe us?!”

  We follow the path that connects the eighteenth and nineteenth floors and come out at the base of the Central Tree located at the center of the area. Several adventurers, including the ones from Rivira, are standing around the roots.

  Two elves, a man and a woman, are pleading their case to the group.

  Their insistence does nothing to convince their skeptical audience. I glance to my side to check on the vouivre girl and see her grab at her shoulder. Her amber eyes lock onto the elves in fear.

  “Yeah, yeah. Hey! You there, get these two a place to rest their heads. Dreamin’s fine when you do it on a pillow, so make sure they find one.”

  “Bors, please believe me! That monster, it really did…!”

  The unlikely story of a talking monster is raising more than a few eyebrows, but no one will take it seriously if Bors, the man at the top of Rivira’s hierarchy, can’t be convinced.

  However, the elves’ pleading gives us a distraction. We quickly slip out from the tunnel entrance.

  “Mr. Bell!”

  “Are you unhurt?!”

  “Damn, you know how to make a guy worry.”

  “Hi, guys…”

  Hardly anyone else spares us a glance as we make our exit, but as soon as we’re clear of the other adventurers, the rest of Hestia Familia spots me and comes toward us.

  I can hear the relief in their voices as Lilly, Mikoto, and Welf reach us first. Maybe they heard I was separated from my group?

  “……? Um, Master Bell, who might this be…?”

  Haruhime catches up to them with a relieved smile, but then she points out the girl wrapped in salamander wool at my side.

  Well, here goes. “Follow me…” I lead everyone away.

  Rather than returning to Rivira, I head east, deeper into the forest. Lilly gives me a suspicious glance as we make our way among the crystals and dense trees that fill this area of the safe point.

  I keep going until I’m absolutely sure the other adventurers are out of sight and earshot. We’ve come pretty deep into the forest by the time I turn to face everyone.

  We form a circle in the middle of a small clearing that’s surrounded by the sparkle of rock formations.

  “Now then, Mr. Bell, please inform us exactly who this is. Don’t tell Lilly that you’ve dragged us into a new mess by rescuing another girl!”

  Her words are sharp as knives. She walks up to the girl at my side. I think she’s got the wrong idea here…Planting her feet, Lilly tries to get a glimpse under the robe’s hood.

  “Ah.” A weak
sound comes from beneath the cloth as the frightened girl steps back. Lilly takes another step forward, and the girl slips in an attempt to retreat farther.

  The broken leg! I reach out and catch her—her hood falling away in the process.

  “!!”

  Time freezes.

  The exposed bluish-white skin and the jewel on the vouivre girl’s forehead come into view. Lilly and the others are dumbstruck, but they’re ready for battle with weapons drawn in no time flat.

  Lilly springs backward as Welf grabs hold of the greatsword strapped to his back and Mikoto wraps her fingers around the hilts of two blades hanging from her waist.

  Haruhime’s green eyes open wide with shock as she covers her mouth with both hands.

  Everyone is immediately on edge, and I’m too stunned to react. Beside me, the vouivre girl goes stiff as a board.

  “…You’ve got some explaining to do, Bell.”

  “Lady Haruhime, please come this way.”

  Welf’s eyes never leave my new companion while he speaks. I’ve never heard him sound so intimidating. At the same time, Mikoto positions herself in front of Haruhime, hiding her from the vouivre girl.

  Just as they’ve always been, my friends are extremely wary of monsters.

  “W-wait! Everyone, please! This girl, she’s…!”

  “Get away from it, Mr. Bell!! What’s going on in that head of yours?!”

  Lilly cuts off my attempt to explain, practically screaming at me as she aims her bow gun. Her chestnut-colored eyes are brimming with reproach and confusion.

  “Did Mr. Bell bring her along because she has a pretty face?!”

  “N-no, it’s not like that…!”

  “Lilly can’t be blamed for thinking this is a monster fetish!”

  Monster fetish.

  Just as the name suggests, the term monster fetish describes those who have an abnormal sexual attraction to anthropomorphic monsters like harpies and lamias. In the mortal realm we live in, it’s the ultimate insult.

  This is how deeply the hatred for the Dungeon’s inhabitants runs in our hearts.

  “Mr. Bell, monsters are monsters!! Even tamed ones aren’t worth that kind of attention! They’re—our enemies!!”

  Sensing the panic in Lilly’s voice, plus Welf’s and Mikoto’s reactions, I can tell this isn’t going well.

 

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