Shaun took a heavy sip of her apple cider.
“Not to mention that skinny little rocker is in serious like with you.” Celia waved a hand at Shaun. “Girl, you don’t know your power, but that’s why I’m here.”
Just as Shaun was about to take another sip of her cider her phone blared to life in the back of her jean pocket. She pulled it out, looked at the screen, and dropped it between her and Celia.
Celia took in the name on the phone’s display and a Cheshire grin spread across her face. Her eyes crept up to Shaun, who she gave a devious look.
Shaun was clutching her wine glass. “Can I please answer it this time?”
Celia thought about it. “What is this? The fourth time he’s called since lunch?”
“Third.”
Celia wagged her head back and forth, considering the options. “Not this time. Keep him on his toes.”
“He probably thinks that I hate him.”
“Good. It’ll give you even more power over him than you already have.”
“I don’t want to have power over him, Celia, you sound nuts!”
“You have to have power over him if you want to nab him in thirty days. Isn’t that going to be the name of your article? How to Nab a Rock Star in Thirty Days?”
Shaun’s phone beeped to notify her that Adam had left a voicemail. In the three times he’d called her since lunch he had yet to leave a message.
“He’s probably calling to tell me that he’s done with the bullshit games and is going to hire a real professional girlfriend.” Her eyes bore into Celia’s. “In case you’ve forgotten that’s what I’m supposed to be right now… his professional girlfriend.”
“Just listen to the message,” Celia said, unmoved, while taking another sip of her wine.
Shaun dialed her voicemail, staring at her friend as she did.
“Hey, it’s Adam. Look, I’m sorry about earlier… I’m not trying to… I never want to upset you… so, I’m sorry. I wanted to tell you that and also… the guys and I are doing a couple shows in Australia next week. Thought it’d be cool if you came. So…let me know either way.”
Shaun brought the phone from her ear, eyes wide.
“What did he say?” Celia demanded.
Shaun couldn’t speak, so instead she held the phone out to her friend silently.
Celia took the phone and replayed Adam’s message, her devious smile even larger than before. “God damn, I’m good.”
Six
Adam was hunched over the seat, his head nearly in his lap, laughing as quietly as he could. His entire body shook with glee as he struggled to maintain control on the quiet airplane.
They were currently at 30,000 feet, Sydney bound, and all of Adam’s band mates and crew were fast asleep. Shaun had agreed to go on the trip at the very last minute, and Adam had been like a kid in a candy store from the moment she'd accepted his invitation. He'd insisted on sitting next to her on the massive jet and had happily stayed awake with her even though the small bags under his eyes illustrated just how tired he was. The only people still awake on the private jet were Shaun, Adam and, she could only hope, the pilots manning the plane.
“Shut up. Are you trying to wake the whole plane? This isn’t funny,” she whispered, shoving him again when the shake of his shoulders only intensified. Holding up the In Touch magazine that had both of them on the cover, her eyes widened. “Seriously, I look like a trained seal in this picture. Does my face actually look like that?” She looked at the cover, again, with the title ‘Adam’s New Toy’ splashed across their picture, and almost threw the magazine across the plane. “I mean, do I honestly look like that?”
Adam finally sat up, a laugh still threatening his lips, and leaned back in his seat until he was facing Shaun. He shifted under the large wool blanket they were sharing. “It’s just a bad photo. Someone at In Touch probably has it out for you, but Janelle will handle it.”
Shaun waved a hand. “Don’t bother Janelle with my problems.”
“She won’t be bothered. It’s her job.”
“I really do kind of hate the title ‘Adam’s New Toy’,” Shaun said, considering it. “Okay, if you really don’t mind talking to Janelle that would be great.”
“I will,” he whispered, yawning softly.
Shaun scoffed and placed the magazine in the seat back pocket. She didn’t want to look at it, anymore. “I guess being your little toy is better than being your weird virginal girlfriend--” She jammed her mouth shut. What the hell had she just said? Celia would have her head. Slowly, she opened her eyes, one at a time, and peeked at Adam. Yep, he’d heard every word.
“What?” He was suddenly alert and sitting up tall. He bent forward slightly and gave her a look.
“What?” Shaun repeated, feigning confusion.
“Did you just say ‘virginal girlfriend’?”
Shaun thought about how to answer his question and couldn’t come up with anything. She would cut off her left foot to be able to call Celia at that moment, but her phone had no service in the skies. She met Adam’s eyes while widening her own. “What?” she asked, again.
“Don’t play dumb with me.” Adam’s face grew serious. “Are you a…” he looked around him and made sure everyone was still sleeping before looking back to her and whispering, “are you a virgin?”
Shaun took a deep breath. “Kind of.”
“Holy shit.” He was at a loss for words for several moments. “I’m sorry but how the hell could you be a virgin?”
“What does that mean?”
“With all due respect, it means you have an ass on you that is distracting to dangerous levels and a face…” he faltered, “it means you’re a fucking knockout… and knockouts aren’t virgins.”
“Um… thank you?” Shaun wasn’t sure if she should be flattered or offended by all the words he’d just said.
“You’re welcome,” he answered, still in awe.
“Don’t act so surprised,” she scolded, crossing her arms over her chest. “I was fat in high school, okay? That didn’t make me very popular with all the horny high school boys.”
Adam’s mouth was agape. “How fat?”
“Huge.” Shaun’s eyes widened.
“How much did you weigh?”
“I’m not telling you that. And I’m not having this conversation.”
“Tell me.”
“No.”
“What? 200 pounds?” Adam took in her reaction. “300? Four?”
“I’m not telling you.”
“How did you lose the weight?”
“Well, first I unloaded all of the annoying hundred pound rock stars that were constantly down my throat. You’re next.” She pointed a finger at him.
He grabbed her finger. “So you’re in college now. You’re definitely NOT 200 pounds. Why haven’t you boned some lucky guy yet?”
Shaun snatched her finger away. “It’s been this long… I might as well make sure I don’t lose it to some asshole. Make it special or something.”
Adam couldn’t speak.
“Stop staring at me,” she said, turning away from him and pretending to be riveted by the black sky outside of her window.
Adam couldn’t turn away.
--
“I told Adam that I’m a virgin.”
“Ugh…” Was all Celia could say over the phone. A long silence followed. Apparently this was a mistake of such epic proportions that it had left even Celia speechless.
“I’m sorry,” Shaun said, a cringe covering her face.
“Where are you right now?”
“In the bathroom of our hotel room.”
“Our?” Celia repeated, her voice filled with disbelief. “You guys are sharing a room?”
“We have to. Girlfriends and boyfriends don’t sleep in separate rooms.”
“Never talk to Adam about your sex life, again.”
“We’ll I’ve already played my whole hand when it comes to talking about my sex life. I don’t have one.
He knows that now.”
“Well if he brings it up, again, just change the subject. And trust me, he will bring it up again. There’s nothing more fascinating to a guy than a girl in her twenties who’s a virgin by choice. So the next time he tries to bring it up, tell him that you’re a lady and you don’t talk about those things.”
“But I’ve already talked about it—“
“You’re a lady and you don’t talk about those things.”
With a sigh, Shaun relented. “Fine. You should probably know that I also told him I used to be fat.”
“Oh Christ.”
“Sorry.” Shaun said, biting her lip.
“Minor setbacks. I’m still at work. Give me a few hours to think of a way to fix what you and your big mouth have broken and I’ll get back to you.”
“Okay. I love you, I’m sorry.”
“Love you. Keep me posted.”
--
Shaun left the bathroom and crossed the massive luxury suite that she would be sharing with Adam for the next two days. Something that felt like a million butterflies was attacking her stomach. She wasn’t sure when she’d gone from simply tolerating Adam to actually looking forward to talking to him, seeing him and just being around him, but as she looked around their empty suite, searching for him, it became apparent to her that he was no longer just a job she had to do—a necessary evil—but someone she was quickly growing to like. The feeling scared her.
The patio door was propped open and a gentle breeze made the white see-through curtains dance elegantly into the room. Shaun made her way to the open door and grinned when she saw Adam leaning against the rails of the balcony, talking to someone on the phone. She joined him, leaning against the rails beside him. The sides of their arms touched and Adam acknowledged her from the corner of his eye, phone still on his ear, before leaning over and bumping her shoulder with his. Shaun laughed softly, the fluttering in her stomach all the more intense.
Adam smiled down at her as he finished up his call. “All right. Cool. Thanks man.” He hung up and looked over to Shaun, who was now looking out at the scenery before them.
“I can’t believe this view. I can’t believe I’m here.” She sighed, taking in the beauty of the Sydney Harbor at night from the Park Hyatt balcony. The opera house and bridge seemed to glow under the moonlight. White lights bounced off of the calm water of the harbor, giving it all a fairytale feel. “Thanks for inviting me. This is something that I would have probably never seen on my own. Not ever,” she said, looking up at Adam.
Adam swallowed hard, searching her face. There were so many things he wanted to say to her but he found himself afraid to even speak. Talking had done nothing to help him with Shaun up until that point, and he found that with each passing day he was less and less willing to do anything to upset her. He thought about the things he said around her ten times more than he had when they first met. He cared about her. He cared about how she felt and, more importantly, how she felt about him.
“What?” she asked, running a self-conscious hand over her hair when she felt him staring.
Adam leaned closer to her, bumping her shoulder, again. “That was one of my good friends on the phone. He’s a pretty big name in the fashion industry.” Adam’s eyes scanned her face and lingered on her lips. “I got you an audition with Dolce and Gabbana tomorrow morning.”
“What?!”
“I wanted to surprise you.”
“I…. what?!”
Adam held his hands out, his voice growing higher. “It’s going to be one of the biggest shows of the year. Anna Wintour is already confirmed front row and I think it’ll be really good for you. It could open a lot of big doors.”
Shaun’s eyes watered. “How did you even?…” She couldn’t speak. “What did you even?…”
“I had to sleep with the director.” He laughed at the serious look on her face. “I know a guy, he owes me a favor.”
“You shouldn’t have used your favor on me,” Shaun scolded, her heart tightening with the kind of anxiety she’d never experienced. A week ago she was sure that working on the set of his music video would, far and away, be the scariest predicament he could ever put her in, but this was far scarier. Her? On a fashion runway? It was a disaster waiting to happen. “You’ve seen me in heels. Why in the world would you put your name on a girl like me?”
Adam blinked at her. “Well someone has to because you sure as hell never do. Shaun, why can’t you see that you’re a fucking badass?”
“I’m only 5’7”. There’s no way Dolce and Gabbana are going to let me walk in their show. They would have to hem every piece of clothing they put on me by several, several inches.”
“Have you ever heard of Kate Moss? Devon Aoki? Your height is only as detrimental as you allow it to be.”
Shaun could only shake her head in disbelief. She couldn’t wrap her head around what this man saw in her and why he was so willing to put his own ass on the line for her time and time again. Was it just because he felt guilty about all of the shitty things he’d said? Or did he really think that highly of her? She couldn’t decide.
“You’ll be great.” Adam placed a hand on the small of her back.
“We’ll see if you’re still saying that when I completely blow this audition.”
“You’re not going to blow it. And even if you did blow it—which you won’t—this friend of mine really does owe me a huge favor.” His eyes widened. “I mean huge.”
Shaun stared blankly.
“Huge.”
Shaun blinked eyes big.
Adam lost all patience. “You’re going to get the gig. You just have to show up.”
Shaun was in utter shock. The plan she’d been rapidly concocting in her head—to purposely blow the audition—was clearly not an option. Adam had set her up with a sure thing. There was no way she could blow off the audition, either, because it would blow her cover. What aspiring model would ever miss the chance to walk for Dolce and Gabbana? She would have to do it but she was not ready for it. There was no way she’d be able to pull it off.
“Look, I have an idea,” he said. “Meet me at the beach at five. Bring your highest heels.”
“I can’t meet you at the beach at five. You have a show at eight. You have sound check. You have important things to do.”
“You have got to relax, Shaun.” Adam turned to face her completely and grabbed her waist, forcing her to face him. He leaned down until they were eye to eye, quickly becoming transfixed by her wide brown orbs. “Beach. Five. Conversation over.”
“I--”
“OVER.”
--
Adam met Shaun on the beach at five sharp, having hurried down to the sand directly after giving a press conference in one of the hotel’s conference rooms. Answering question after question, Adam had found himself distracted by thoughts of Shaun. There had even been a few questions he’d had to have repeated because he hadn’t been paying attention. It just boggled his mind how a woman so amazing could be so unwilling to better herself, accept a heartfelt gift or take her life to the next level when the opportunity was right in front of her face. Shaun was such a far cry from any model he'd ever known just for the simple fact that she wasn’t just a beautiful, shallow shell. There was something that ran deeper with her, much deeper, and he was now, more than ever, hungry to dive in.
Ten minutes later, he was holding Shaun steady in her heels.
“Okay just walk.” He let go of Shaun’s hand slowly, the same way he would a kid who was just learning to ride a bike without training wheels. Holding a safety hand out right next to her, he laughed when Shaun began strutting across the sand in her heels, teetering with every step. “If you can walk in heels in sand you can walk in heels anywhere. Trust. After dealing with this sand that runway will be a piece of cake.”
Shaun struggled to lift her leg out of the sand with every step, feeling like there were two-ton boulders attached to her legs. Every time she was sure she had her foot down in the
sand and had gained some leverage, another pile seemed to give way underneath her, making her stumble. “This is exhausting!”
“Just picture yourself on the runway.”
Adam stayed with Shaun for the better part of the hour, until she was walking across that sand like she owned the place.
“See?” he asked, nearly an hour later, from where he was sitting in the sand. “It helps right?”
“Actually yeah,” Shaun said, making her way over to him. “I understand why you brought me out here now. I feel a little bit better about tomorrow.”
Adam jumped up from the sand and came to face her, taking her waist. “Listen Shaun. I know all about the fear you’re feeling.”
Shaun rolled her eyes. “What have you ever feared in your life, Adam? You’re a wildly successful musician, you’re rich as hell, you’re handsome, and you’re about to have an arena full of screaming people desperate to worship the ground you walk on. What in the world does a guy like you have to fear?” She tilted her head at him. “Hmmm?”
Adam silently reeled at the tug he’d immediately felt when she’d called him handsome. He realized that, right at that moment, he would give this woman anything she asked.
“What do I have to fear? Where the hell do I begin?” A smile spread across his face, but faded just as quickly as it came. “You think it doesn’t scare me that my record label wants a new album from me in the next year when I don’t have a single piece of new material written? Huh? You think it doesn’t scare me that I have a meeting with the head of my label in one week and I have absolutely nothing to show him? You think it doesn’t scare the shit out of me that I feel like I’ve lost my passion for music? The same passion that has driven me all the way up to this point, this moment, this second? I don’t know who I am without music, and I feel like I’m losing that part of me. It’s scary as hell Shaun, and I get it, but if we allow fear to consume us it will. It won’t hesitate.”
Shaun gripped his arms and nodded, running her fingers over is taut muscles. “Okay. So what do you do? What do you do when you feel like the fear could just eat you alive?”
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