by Dana Mentink
Despair filled his mind as he struggled to keep on his back, to hold Gwen’s head above water for as long as he could.
Then he felt a tug, and slow movement against the current.
He opened his eyes to see Devin Ackerman there, attached to the fixed rope by his own tether, hauling them both back. His face was tight with the effort. He yelled something that Shane could not make out.
Another few minutes and they were close to the bank. Kelly splashed in to assist them as Devin unstrapped Gwen and Kelly half supported, half dragged Gwen from the water.
Devin turned his attention to Shane next. Gripping Shane’s PFD firmly in one hand, he undid the quick release on the tow tether and began to haul him toward shore.
The events unfolded in a watery haze. Did Ackerman stumble? Did a sudden vicious jerk of water unsettle him?
Or had Ackerman finally found the perfect way to end Shane’s investigations?
Shane did not have a moment to decide as he found himself tumbling free, back into the angry current.
FIFTEEN
Kelly struggled to carry Gwen away from the water. She checked for a pulse, relieved to find one fluttering under the cold skin. She pulled an emergency blanket from her pack and wrapped Gwen up as best as she could.
Gwen moaned, and her eyelids twitched. She opened them briefly. “I’m…”
“Quiet, now,” Kelly said, patting her hands. “You’re okay. Just rest. Shane got you out of the water so you’re going to be okay.”
Devin ran up, and his look made her bolt to her feet. “What? Where is Shane?”
He shook his head, hands splayed open in a gesture of helplessness. “The current took him right out of my grip.”
“What do you mean? Where is he?” She darted to the water’s edge and found no sign of Shane.
Her nerves propelled her forward, but Devin grabbed her arm. “Where are you going?”
“Stay with Gwen. I’m going to find him.”
“No, you’ll drown. The water is ferocious. I’ll radio ahead. Chenko will send someone.”
“That will be too late,” she hissed, ripping her arm away from Devin’s hold.
Gwen was sitting up now, looking from Kelly to Devin in dazed horror. “I’m so sorry, Rose.”
Kelly froze, staring into Gwen’s face. “What did you just call me?”
Gwen started to cry. Kelly’s need to know pierced her insides, but even more pressing was her overwhelming fear for Shane. Without another moment’s hesitation, she took off, doubling back to the trail that rose above the bank.
From there she would be able to spot him.
Her legs felt like lead as she ran upslope, pushing aside the branches that slapped at her face. Climbing until her lungs burned, she stopped to scan the river. Down below, the water took a sharp turn, thundering over rocks and scouring the steep banks. She saw no sign of him in the roiling water. She needed a higher vantage point so she sprinted again as fast as she could on the uneven ground. Finally, at the top of the low cliff she stopped again, her eyes poring over every wave, every rock, straining for any sign of Shane in the tumult below.
A flash of color caught her eye—Shane’s helmet. He was lying in a shallow eddy. Heart hammering, she ran back down the trail until she found the nearest area that was passable. Sitting on the ground, she skidded and plunged down the rocky slope, kicking aside foliage, jumping over stone outcroppings until she hurtled onto the bank. She scanned the river edge until she found him again, his body splayed out in the shallow water, very still.
Fear soaked into every pore as she ran to him.
God, please, please, please. Though she could not say the words, she knew God already saw the terror in her heart, the all-consuming fear that Shane was gone. She made it to his side, relieved to see that he had settled on his back, the PFD keeping his head above the shallow water that cradled him.
“Shane,” she whispered, her eyes scanning for blood, fingers fumbling for a pulse at his neck. “Can you hear me?”
He was still, his face deathly pale except for the bruise along one cheekbone. She reached under his arms and pulled him away from the water, onto drier ground. Still he did not move. Her fingers shook so badly, she could not tell if the pulsing was the shaking of her fingers or the beat of his heart.
She placed her fingers on his wrist, trying to find the comforting rhythm there, when suddenly his fingers circled hers. She looked up to find his blue eyes looking at her, fogged with pain.
“Lonnie. Did you find him? Did you get him out?” he whispered.
“Shane.” She stroked his cheeks with her palms. “Oh, Shane, you’re alive.”
“Lonnie? Did you find him?”
She tried to quiet him. “You’re confused. You got swept away.”
“Lonnie’s gone?” His voice was so small, like a little boy’s.
“Honey, your brother Lonnie is dead. It was a long time ago,” she said as gently as she could.
He blinked, and the fog lifted from his eyes as he struggled to sit up. He turned his face to the thundering river behind him, and she watched as the memory of what had happened returned. “It wasn’t Lonnie. It was Gwen,” he said.
“Yes. She’s okay. You saved her.”
His shoulders sagged. “That’s good.”
His voice was so flat, hollow, his fingers clawed up to the knuckles into the rocky soil. She wrapped her arms around him gently. “Oh, Shane. I thought you had drowned.”
“No. Somehow just the people around me do that.”
The pain in his blue eyes was so intense, and she knew it was not the physical kind. “You were with Lonnie when he died, weren’t you?” she asked very softly.
He shrugged her off, struggling to his feet, ignoring her helping hands. “I’m the reason he died.”
“That can’t be true.”
He whirled toward her, staggering slightly. “Don’t you think I’ve spent twenty years wishing it wasn’t true? Try as hard as I can, but I can’t change the facts—not a single one of them.” His eyes were wild. “I took him down to the river to look for crawfish. I was thirteen. I told him to stay on the bank, and I waded into the deeper water. The creek was swollen by rain, moving fast. I heard a splash. I turned around.”
She watched as his face twisted in agony.
“He was gone. I couldn’t find him. No one could find him until hours later.”
Kelly took a step toward him. “It was an accident. A horrible accident.”
“No, Kelly. I don’t buy it. God could have saved him. That’s what you believe, isn’t it? That’s what my brother used to believe, that God is all-powerful, watching over us and protecting us. Isn’t that what Christians are taught?”
She opened her mouth to answer, but he cut her off.
“God could have saved Lonnie, even if I couldn’t, but He didn’t. He didn’t save my brother, and that day He let me die, too.”
“God didn’t take Lonnie to punish you. He loves you.”
“Loves me?” Shane’s eyes were wild. “Is that love? He destroyed me and my parents. Doctors said Mom died of a stroke six months later, but it was a broken heart that killed her. My father is in a nursing home. He doesn’t even know who I am, or what’s happening to Todd. I think his mind went because I let Lonnie die.”
“No. Your father knows it was an accident.”
He shook his head, face drawn into bitter lines. “I lost everything that day, I just didn’t know it.”
The truth dawned on her, causing her breath to come up short. “That’s why you left me, isn’t it? You didn’t want the responsibility of caring for a child because of what happened to Lonnie.”
He reached out to her and then his hands dropped, curling into fists. “I killed my brother. How could I take care of your little boy?” He closed his eyes. “How could I risk it?”
She wanted more than anything to hold him then, to squeeze away the ferocious pain that had built inside him for years. The words from Romans echo
ed through her memory. Neither death, nor life…
A wind blew softly against her face.
Nor things present, nor things to come, nor powers, nor height, nor depth, nor any other created thing…
Shane looked so alone, so completely destroyed.
Shall be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord.
“Shane,” she whispered, “God hasn’t left you. He’s put people here who love you, who will stay with you.” She swallowed hard, her heart filled to bursting with long-suppressed feelings. “I’ll stay, if you want me to.”
His eyes rounded, and for a moment the shadow lifted from his face. “All I want…”
She waited, holding her breath.
The hardess returned, covering the light on his face like the cruel rush of waves. “…is to finish this race.”
He turned and trudged away down the bank.
“Where are you going?” she called over the water.
“To find my canoe,” he said, without looking back.
Shane was the last to finish, but at least he managed that. By the time he found his C-1 bobbing upside down in an eddy, it was past noon. He righted the dented craft and, struggling against dizziness, his battered muscles complaining with every move, he paddled toward the finish point, sticking to the easiest routes.
Chenko helped him drag his canoe up onto the sand. “Well, kid. Sounds like you saved the day. Gwen Falco is going to be all right, thanks to you.”
Shane nodded, stripping off his PFD and pulling on a dry shirt Chenko handed him.
“If you don’t want to continue, no one would blame you.”
Shane located the trailhead, which kicked off the next section of the racecourse. “I’m going to finish what I started.”
Chenko nodded. “Good man. I just don’t want you dying on me midrace.”
“I don’t intend to.”
“I’ll see to it that Kelly takes a look at you when you get to the overnight rest point.”
He shrugged. “She’s leaving in the morning. She’ll probably be gone by the time I get there.”
Chenko shrugged. “I think we can talk her out of leaving. Devin’s pretty charming when he sets his mind to it.”
Shane thought about his last moments with Ackerman. Had he deliberately let Shane go into the rough water? His mind was too addled to know for sure, but he made a mental note to call Bill Cloudman when he returned and make certain that Kelly was leaving Desert Quest.
As he trudged toward the trail, he tried to think through his behavior with Kelly. Why had he shared with her all the trauma from his past? At least she knew now the real reason he’d left her.
And she probably despised him for it. Or worse, felt sorry for him.
God hasn’t left you, she’d said.
Then where was He? Shane walked under the thick shade of the trees and felt chilled by much more than his tumble through the water. Todd was on the verge of going to prison. Lonnie was dead. And Kelly would be gone soon.
But she’d offered to stay.
He’d seen the tenderness in her eyes. I’ll stay if you want me to.
How could he ask her to stay? After he’d hurt her beyond measure? With the danger circling around him? He swallowed. And she now knew that he was responsible for his little brother’s drowning.
He slapped at a branch that bobbed in his face.
Finish this leg of the race. Once they were back in camp, he could continue to follow the trail back to the murder at the diner. He felt more and more certain that whoever had murdered the waitress was Olivia’s killer. And possibly the reason Rose was on the run.
That killer, he had no doubt, was Devin Ackerman. He’d terrorized Ellen Brown into providing him with an alibi, maybe by poisoning her. He was determined to see Shane disappear.
Good, he thought. All the anger and hurt that he’d shared with Kelly was now forming into a white-hot ball of resolve in his gut.
Ackerman might have tried to drown him. But he hadn’t succeeded.
That meant he was getting close. A grim smile twisted his bruised face.
Ready or not, Ackerman, here I come.
In spite of her aching heart, Kelly had returned to find Devin still sitting with Gwen. He jumped up when he saw her approach.
“What happened?”
“I found him. He’s okay. He went to find his canoe.”
Devin’s face must have mirrored the shock in her own. “He’s crazy.”
She shrugged. Crazy and shouldering more pain than she’d ever realized. How could she not have known the truth? Sensed it? Under his easy smile, his fun-loving nature, he held a burden of guilt that crushed him. She wanted to sit down and cry, to pray for him with all her strength, but she had other duties to attend to.
She checked Gwen over again, monitored her vital signs and wrapped her securely against the chill. The most dangerous thing was shock. They made arrangements for Kelly to drive Gwen to the clinic and for Kelly’s replacement to come over as soon as possible to monitor the other racers. Just as she was ready to load a semiconscious Gwen into the car, the woman’s eyes snapped open.
She blinked hard and raised a shaking hand to her face. “Am I okay?”
Kelly squeezed her arm. “You’re just fine. We’ll get you to a hospital so they can check you out fully.”
Gwen shook her head. “No. I’m not hurt. I want to go meet Betsy at the rest point.”
Devin shook his head. “Oh, no. After what you’ve been through, you should be off to the hospital, and so should that idiot Matthews. I’m going to call Chenko and see if he’s made it there yet.” He walked away a few paces and began speaking into his radio.
Kelly crouched next to Gwen, keeping her voice low. “You need to explain something to me.”
Gwen’s eyes widened. “What?”
“When we pulled you out, you called me Rose.”
Gwen’s mouth opened and closed.
Kelly stared her full in the face. “You need to tell me how you know my sister.”
“Your sister?”
“Listen to me. My sister is in trouble. You know something about that. I want to hear the truth from you right now.”
Gwen closed her eyes, and her face grew pale. Kelly reached for her wrist and patted it. “Forgive me, Gwen. I’m sorry to push. I know you’ve been through a horrifying experience. I’m just worried about Rose, that’s all.”
Gwen opened her eyes. “I…”
Devin returned. “He made it. Chenko says he looked beat up but okay. He’s gone on to the run, and if he doesn’t keel over somewhere in the middle, we’ll meet him at the checkpoint. I’ll help you ladies to the car.”
“Gwen is refusing to go to the clinic.”
Devin rolled his eyes. “This is getting ridiculous. All right. I guess we can’t force you. Kelly, since we’ve got your replacement on the way, you can personally attend to Gwen for the rest of this leg.”
Kelly nodded, and they helped Gwen walk to Kelly’s vehicle and slide into the passenger seat. Devin gave Kelly a hug, which lasted a moment too long.
She pulled away. “What’s that for?”
“You handled everything so well. Getting help, tending to Gwen, keeping a cool head. I hate to lose you.”
“My colleague will do just as well.”
He sighed. “No one could replace you, Kelly. I’m going to head back upstream and start the last group. I’ll radio you if there’s any more trouble.”
“Devin?” Kelly asked, stopping him.
“Yeah?”
“What happened when you were pulling Shane in? It seemed like you had him, and then he was sucked back into the water.”
Devin’s eyes narrowed. “I lost my grip. Water was moving pretty fast. Why?”
“Just wondered.”
A cloud passed across the sun, and Devin’s eyes glittered in the shadow. “Do you think I let him go on purpose?”
Kelly met his stare head-on. “Did you?”
/>
“No, and I’m going to chalk up your unreasonable accusation to the shock of the incident. Then again, maybe you’re starting to buy into Shane’s conspiracy theory. Someone tampered with his bike, rifled his trailer.”
“You have to admit, those things haven’t been explained away.”
“Only explanation required is that Shane is a nutcase. I think it’s better for you to stay away from him.”
“Is that why a snake wound up in my pack? Was that you, trying to make me decide to leave here?”
He blinked. “A snake?”
“Yes.”
His eyed danced in thought. “No. I didn’t have anything to do with any snake.”
She caught a flicker of something on his face that she could not read before he turned away. “See you,” he called.
A feeling of unease settled into Kelly’s stomach as she got into the driver’s seat and headed slowly back up the trail toward the road that would take them to the checkpoint. Devin was definitely hiding something—this time she was sure of it. But at the moment, it was more important to find out more from Gwen.
She adjusted the heater to keep Gwen warm in her wet clothes. Gwen stared out the window.
“All right,” Kelly said as they drove. “No more interruptions. How do you know my sister?”
Gwen chewed her lip. “I don’t know why I called you Rose. Maybe you misheard me.”
Kelly shook her head. “You know my sister. How?”
Gwen stuck a finger in her mouth and chewed on the nail. “I must have heard you talking about her. I got confused, that’s all.”
Kelly let the silence between them grow while she fought for calm. “Gwen, quit lying to me. I’m not going to stop until you tell me the truth. My uncle is a Tribal Ranger, and I’m sure he could get the local police here to ask you the question if you’d prefer.”
Gwen darted a look at Kelly. Then she lowered her gaze to her lap. “I’m a friend of your sister’s. We’ve been friends for years.”
Kelly’s stomach tightened in excitement. “And?”
“And a year and a half ago she contacted me and asked me to do her a big favor.”
“What favor?”
