by Liz Matis
“I never said you couldn’t do it.” Liam sighed, as if signaling giving up that part of the argument. “But I’m asking you to respect my privacy.” He ran a hand through his unruly hair. “To respect our marriage.”
To respect our marriage? Did Liam want to make this work too or was he only interested in protecting his image?
The producer wanted both of them, so if he was out, then she was too. “But people will forget about me.” She hated the whine in her voice.
“Impossible, Hayden.” Liam traced her jawline with his thumb, tilting her chin so she would look him in the eye. “You are unforgettable.”
His hands drifted down to where her robe gaped. He pulled the lapels open to access her breasts, cupping each one. “I want to spend the rest of the night memorizing your body with my hands.” He brushed a kiss on her lips. “Then with my mouth.”
“After you’re done, there will be a test.”
Liam raised a brow. “What kind of test?”
“A blindfolded one,” she whispered.
“Sounds like my kind of test.” He nodded with approval. “But I’ll have to examine you thoroughly so I can ace it.”
Hayden forgot all about the reality show as he discarded her robe and laid her back onto the cushions. Liam was real, The feel of his hands tenderly mapping her body was real. The love in her heart was real.
Chapter 17
The team rolled to a 3 and 1 record. Liam, back in the good graces of the press and the fans, should be happy. With Hayden away on business and him back from an away game, he loafed on the couch, flipping aimlessly through the channels. He should try to catch up on some much-needed sleep. He avoided the bed, filled with Hayden’s scent, but so cold and lonely without her sexy, voluptuous body to warm it. She traveled for business more than she was home, and he wasn’t any better with away games.
Liam missed his wife.
Really missed her.
His apartment, now filled with Hayden’s things, felt empty without her laughter. He wanted to share stories of the latest win, and then hear about her day of wheeling and dealing. How had she inserted herself into his life so seamlessly? Like she’d belonged there all along.
Hypersensitive to the unusual quiet, he heard the door open despite the television telling him he should buy a new car.
“You’re home,” he said with way too much enthusiasm. Liam knew he should keep his real feelings buried until Hayden fell in love with him.
“Surprise!” She jumped on his lap just as excited.
“A beautiful surprise.” To heck with being cool. He threaded his hands through her hair, covering her lips with his. Tongues mingled in a sensuous play of who missed whom the most.
She pulled away, her eyes now a dreamy blue. “I thought you’d be sleeping. I was planning to wake you in a most delicious manner.”
“I can pretend to be asleep.” He closed his eyes and snored.
“Too late. You’re already hard.” She rocked her hips, her sex deliciously rubbing up against his cock, furthering his agony. She leaned forward and whispered into his ear, “And I’m so wet.”
That did it. He was in no mood for foreplay. “Bed. Now.”
“Race you. Loser gets tied up.” Hayden hopped off his lap for a good head start.
“Cheater,” he yelled, pretending to dash after her. He’d let her win. Because being a loser in this game was a win for him.
By the time she had him naked and tied, Liam was ready to tear the bonds that held him. Her designer scarves would suffer the same fate as her lingerie if he chose. Instead he savored each brush of her fingertips, enjoyed the torture of each swipe of her tongue, and grew harder with every dirty word out of her sweet, hot mouth.
“Did you miss this, Hayden?” Did you miss me as much as I missed you?
“Desperately,” she breathed. She loosened the knots. “Make love to me, Liam.”
A banging knock at his apartment door jolted Liam awake. The spot beside him was empty of Hayden’s lovely form. He glanced at the clock. 3:00 a.m. Who the hell could it be?
He jumped out of bed, slid into a pair of sweatpants, and then heard a muffled male voice. A former boyfriend? A current one? No, that was the late hour talking. He took a calming breath before jealousy overrode his good sense. Hayden had never given him any reason to suspect she’d been unfaithful.
Stepping into the hallway, he listened to the voices coming from the living room. Liam didn’t like to eavesdrop, but Hayden was his wife and, while her business was her business in the light of a day, at 3:00 a.m. it was his.
“Harry, it’s the middle of the night.” she said. “Can’t this wait until tomorrow?”
Liam rested his forehead on the wall in relief. Not a former boyfriend, just her pompous younger brother. Before the wedding, Liam had only met him a couple of times, but each encounter had left a bitter taste in his mouth. His opinion of Harry hadn’t improved. A sense of entitlement radiated from the spoiled brat.
“You have to help me,” Harry told his sister.
“What happened this time?” Hayden asked.
In a rush, Harry explained his car had been impounded for outstanding tickets. Of course that wasn’t the worst of it—five grams of cocaine would most likely be discovered at any moment. Harry wanted his sister to take the fall. Again?
“We’ll say you borrowed my car to avoid the press. It worked the last time.”
What last time? Had Hayden covered for her brother last year? She’d spent three months in rehab and completed a hundred hours of community service for that conviction.
“I can’t do it Harry. I just got off of probation. I’ll go to jail.”
“You have to. You’ll get away with it. You always do. Judge Mayer loves you now that you married choirboy McQueen.”
Liam clenched his fists, fighting the urge to pommel her brother. Stepped out of the shadows, he said, “You heard her the first time. The answer is no.”
Chapter 18
Hayden’s heart stopped at the protective but fierce expression on Liam’s face.
In a scathing tone, Harry said, “This is none of your concern. Family only.”
She’d never seen such a hateful look from Harry. Her eyes widened in shock. Where was her sweet little brother?
Before Hayden could blink an eye, Liam had placed himself between them. “I’m her husband. That makes me family.”
“That’s what you think,” Harry snarled.
“What does that mean?” She took Liam’s hand. That he considered them family gave her hope. Perhaps their marriage was more than a sham.
Harry took a step toward her, stumbling over his words. “You didn’t even want him on the team, never mind in your bed. He’s a loser, remember?”
“Liam, I—”
“That not breaking news.” He patted her hand. “The fact that you’ve covered for your brother’s ass is.”
“Not anymore.” For the first time she saw her little brother for what he was—a drug addict. “Harry, I’ll be there to support you, but I won’t enable you any longer. You need professional help. Rehab.”
His lip curled into a sneer. “Look at you, all high and mighty. You get a ring and now you’re Suzie-fucking-homemaker.”
Hayden’s eyes watered. Her brother had never lashed out like that at her. It must be the drugs.
“You will not talk to your sister like that.”
She was glad Liam was here. In the business world she was known as a piranha, but when it came to her brother, she was like a protective mama bear.
“You’ll regret not helping me.” Harry headed to the door. “You both will.”
“Harry—” But the door slammed before she could reason with him. “My father is going to be livid.”
“But not with you.”
“Yes, with me.” Hayden folded her arms. “He’ll accuse me of being a bad influence on my brother. I gave him his first beer. Introduced him to the club scene.”
“Like he wouldn�
��t have done those things on his own? Even if that were true, Hayden, your brother is an adult. He’s responsible for his own choices.”
“My father doesn’t see it that way.”
“He doesn’t know what you did for Harry. Why did you take the fall for him?”
“With those angelic looks? He would not survive jail.”
“And you would?”
“Better me than him.” She shrugged. “My father will be devastated. He loves Harry.”
“Hayden, he loves you too.”
“Whatever.” No matter what she accomplished, she’d never been the apple of her father’s eye. Even knowing football inside and out hadn’t impressed him. Harry was the golden child. The favorite.
“No, not whatever,” Liam said. “Do you know what your father told me when I argued that our engagement would hurt the team’s chances for a Championship run?”
Fearing Liam’s answer, she went on the defensive. “Oh, I don’t know. That you didn’t have a snowball’s chance of getting back there anyway.”
“No.” Liam’s mouth tilted a notch upwards into a soft smile. “He said ‘my daughter is more important than any Championship.’”
“He said that?” Tears flowed freely from her eyes. Her father loved her? He’d never said the words. Neither had she. To anyone.
Engulfed in Liam’s strong embrace, his warmth blanketed more than just her body. Her heart had found a place to shelter.
She’d gone from wanting to get out of their fake engagement to wanting to do everything in her power to make sure, that one day, they celebrated their sixtieth anniversary, just like her grandparents.
Hopefully, she’d have more success with keeping Liam, than she’d had with getting rid of him.
Chapter 19
The darkened room suited Liam’s mood today, the anniversary of the worst day of his life. A reminder of all he’d lost and all he had to atone for. Glancing at his phone, he saw his mother’s name. He knew that she was hurting just as much as he was. But how could he comfort her when he was to blame for her misery? He answered her call only because she would worry more if he didn’t.
“How are you, Liam?”
“I’m fine. I’m not drinking.” Yet. A sealed bottle of Scotch sat before him on the coffee table, tempting him to accept numbness over grief. “How are you?”
“I visited your father’s grave.”
Liam’s eyes filled. He’d only cried twice in his life. The day his father died and the day he asked God to reenter his heart. “I’ll visit after the season.”
“You can visit with him whenever you want. Speak to him.”
“I know. I do.” He choked out the words.
“Are you okay? Where’s Hayden?”
Liam still stared at the bottle. “Yeah, Mom. No worries. Hayden is at a business meeting. She’ll be home soon.” Then somehow, he’d have to pretend like he hadn’t lost his best friend four years ago. “I love you, Mom.”
“I love you too. I’ll see you once the season is over. Call me if you need anything.”
He smiled for the first time that day. He guessed mothers never stopped being moms. “No, you call me if you need anything.”
As he ended the call, Hayden entered the living room. He hadn’t heard the door or her footsteps. There was no time to hide the Scotch. Maybe it was better that she knew what she was really up against.
“What’s going on, Liam?” she said slowly like she was trying to gage the situation.
“I didn’t have a drink.”
“I didn’t say that you did.” She tossed her purse to a chair. “Why do you want one? Is it something I did?”
“No, Hayden. Come here.” Her desperate plea ate away at his heart. When she sat down next to him, he ran a reassuring hand down her hair. He touched his forehead to hers. “There’s nothing you could do to make me want to take a drink.”
“Then why? I thought things were good. With us, and the team is 7 and 2.”
He pulled away. “I don’t want to talk about it.” If she knew, it would change everything.
“That’s not fair, Liam. You helped me with Harry, but I can’t help you? What about our vows? ‘I will help you when you need help, and turn to you when I need help’.”
She was right. If they were to have a true marriage, he should turn to his wife when he needed help, just as Hayden let him support her. It couldn’t be one-sided. Besides, she deserved to know what a mess he was. “My dad died four years ago today.”
Her hand flew to her chest and her eyes widened. “Oh Liam. I’m sorry I didn’t know today was the… I should know that. I’m a terrible wife.”
“Hayden, stop. You’re a wonderful wife.”
“I am?”
Poor Hayden, she was always looking for approval when she had nothing to prove. “Yes. You are.” He stroked her cheek. “I’m sorry you had to see me like this.”
“There’s more. Tell me. I can see you’re torturing yourself.”
Liam took a deep breath and dragged his fingers down his face. “My father is dead because of me.”
“Your father died in a car accident. A drunk driver.”
“That’s the ironic part.” Disgusted, he smacked the bottle off the table, and it crashed to the carpeted floor. Unbreakable. Unlike his will to resist temptation. “He was driving to Arizona to confront me about my drinking. An intervention.”
Hayden moved from the sofa to the coffee table, blocking his view of where the bottle had landed. Taking both of his hands, she said, “That still doesn’t make it your fault.”
“It is, Hayden. If I had been a better Christian, then he would have never been on that road in the first place. It’s easy to be a Christian when everything is going good. After I went pro, I got sick of everyone from the fans to the press, questioning my faith, hoping I would fail. And I did. I started to lose. Badly. The first time I was tested with adversity, I failed, turning to alcohol and women instead of God. Then my father got killed.”
“And your grief made things worse,” Hayden said.
As if that were any excuse.
“I hit bottom. The bottom of the last bottle, that is. That night, I fell to the floor in a hotel room, cursing God. Then I passed out. When I woke up, the Bible stared at me from underneath the bed. I couldn’t believe it. I reached for it and read and read until I asked God to enter my heart. At that exact moment my phone rang. It was my agent. I asked for help. I was in rehab within two hours.”
“Liam, it’s not your fault. Your father wouldn’t want you to blame yourself.”
“It is my fault.” He swiped the wetness from his face. “My father’s death was God’s punishment for my sins. I don’t deserve to be forgiven.”
“I’ll admit I don’t know a lot about Christianity, but isn’t forgiveness one of the main tenets of the faith?”
Liam nodded, glad that she wasn’t mentioning his tears.
“And that includes forgiving yourself?”
“It does. I’ll work on that, promise. Thank you, Hayden.”
“Is there anything I can do to help you through this?”
“You already have.” He squeezed her hand. “But this is a battle only I can win. Recovery is an inside job.”
“Um, at the risk of hellfire and brimstone being rained down on me, why don’t we take a walk down the block? There’s a church around the corner. Catholic, I think. We could light a candle for your father.”
“I’m not Catholic.” Liam laughed for the second time that day. “But I don’t think they would mind.” It’s probably something he should do every year or come up with another way to deal with his father’s death. Find some way to honor his life, instead of wallowing in his death. “I have to do something first.”
He picked up the bottle, took it to the kitchen sink, and opened the cap. The sweet smell of booze wafted up, and his resolve wavered for a moment. Hayden stood beside him, her scent of spice and vanilla more intoxicating than any alcohol. The comfort of her word
s outmatched the brief relief any tumbler of Scotch ever could.
She wasn’t the spoiled heiress everyone thought she was, but from this day on, he’d spoil her with love. The words sprang to his lips, but he didn’t say them yet. To tell Hayden now that he was in love with her wouldn’t be fair. His declaration would forever be attached to this sad day. Hayden deserved more than that. In fact, she deserved a real proposal. Would she say yes?
He tilted the bottle. The amber liquid swirled down the drain just like his life had once gone down the pipes. But today he was sober, another day won.
Now he needed to win his wife.
Chapter 20
Exhausted, Hayden slumped against the elevator wall. With Harry in rehab, she was left to pick up the pieces of his division at Middleton Nuts, while still juggling her candied-nuts division, her own business, and her charity work, not to mention being the wife of the top-rated quarterback in the league. Now 12 and 1, the team was primed to sail into the playoffs.
The disappointment in Liam’s voice when she canceled their dinner date earlier echoed hers. Hayden hoped he understood that it was only temporary until Harry was ready to take back his responsibilities. Her assistant, Judith, had really stepped up her game, and Hayden planned on delegating more once everything was back to normal.
The elevator door opened and she trudged to the front door.
Maybe she’d take a long vacation once the season was over so she could enjoy time off with Liam. Maybe think about having a baby. Wow, where did that come from? The thought of creating a child with him excited and scared her. He’d be a great father, she knew, but how would she do as a mother?
She chewed on her lip. Perhaps if she did the opposite of everything her parents had done, she’d be okay. She unlocked the door and turned the handle. The wall inside still had the small dent from when she threw back her head in ecstasy on their wedding night. Liam called it his trophy wall and refused to have it fixed.
