He pulled on his last boot and glared out the window overlooking downtown Orlando. Details or not, Abby knew what her daughter had been through was bad. He’d taken them both to a little downtown diner and kept quiet while the two chattered back and forth. The questions had stayed light, but the second Abby spied Brenna’s short, split nails, she’d caught her daughter’s hand, ran her fingertips along Brenna’s work-roughened palm, and then lifted it to her mouth for a reverent kiss.
Stalking down the hallway, he shook the gut-wrenching scene from his thoughts. It was either that or bloody some innocent bystander to take the edge off. He beelined for the coffeemaker. “You know you don’t have to get up and do all this anymore.”
Brenna pushed a bacon strip to one side of the skillet, her gaze distant and her smile soft and dreamy.
At least she was happy. She deserved that and so much more. Not many people thought of other people first, but Brenna did, always factoring in the consequences of her actions.
Well, not all consequences. “You slept with me last night.”
While she kept her eyes cast downward, her hand froze above the skillet and her fingers tightened on the tongs.
He poured a cup of coffee and waited for an answer. When she flipped the burner off and scooped the slices onto a plate instead of answering, he pressed further. “You can’t do that. I told you I don’t want to hurt you. When I’m asleep—”
“Stop it.” The simple command barely carried over his deep voice but was strong enough to halt his tongue. Calmly, she lined up the plate of bacon, a bowlful of scrambled eggs, and a side plate of toast in the center on the black granite countertop. She turned and crossed her arms. “Did anyone make you come here?”
The determined glint in her eye nearly made him take a step back. He sipped his coffee instead. “No.”
“Did anyone make you follow me the day I fell off the bluff?”
“No.”
“Did you sleep?”
He blew across the top of the mug and sent the steam dancing. “That’s not the point.”
“Actually, it is. Did you?”
He took a sip, then set the mug aside. “Yes.”
Brenna straightened, tore two squares from the paper towel spindle, and gathered up the utensils and plates she’d set aside with her breakfast prep. “Well, me giving you that gift was my choice. You can’t take that from me. Not you or anyone else.” She rounded the counter to take her seat. “And you’re welcome.”
His cock stirred, and a slow, but vicious burn fired in his gut. Damn, but an attitude looked good on her. Her near-black eyes sparked bright like he’d never seen before. Tempting and unbreakable. As if he needed any more damned fuel for the fire she’d lit. He prowled forward, the beast in him taking control before common sense could debate otherwise.
A heavy knock rapped against the front door.
Brenna jolted on her barstool, checked the digital clock on the microwave, and hopped down, headed for the entrance. “Wow, Mom’s early. She said she wouldn’t get here until eight.”
Ludan caught her by the arm and hauled her back. Brenna might be surprised her mom was early, but he wasn’t. He’d practically had to pry the two of them apart the night before, and he’d been the killjoy who wouldn’t let her spend the night at her mom’s place. No way was he letting her stay anywhere he couldn’t easily defend. And until he trusted Abby to keep Brenna’s reappearance quiet, her mom wasn’t staying here either. “No answering doors. Not for anyone.”
“But it’s just—”
“No one.” He stalked around her, sweeping the landing outside their apartment with his senses.
Two Myrens, both with energy patterns he knew all too well.
He yanked the door open and scowled at Lexi and Eryx. “Kind of early for a visit.”
Not waiting for an invitation, Eryx cocked an eyebrow and urged Lexi through what little space Ludan allowed. “Well, I kept thinking my somo would pull his head out of his ass and figure out he needed to recharge if he wanted to keep his woman safe, but it seems you left all your common sense at home.”
“Cool it with the ‘my woman’ shit,” Ludan said before the couple could get any deeper in the room.
“Still in denial, huh?”
Wandering into the living room, Brenna eyeballed their unexpected guests. “What does he mean, recharge?”
Ludan opened his mouth to divert the topic.
“He needs to recharge his powers.” Lexi strolled through the living room, surveying the place like her color commentary wasn’t a huge info bomb. “Myrens can’t maintain them longer than a few weeks in Evad. Not enough energy here. It’s been ten days.”
Brenna pegged him with an accusing glower. “You never told me that.”
“I would have handled it.” He refocused on Eryx. “It doesn’t take a personal visit to harass me. What gives?”
“Just a few updates.” Eryx glanced at Lexi. “And to ask for a favor.”
“Updates?” Brenna said.
Done with her casual perusal, Lexi eased onto the pretty orange couch that reminded Ludan of Eden sunsets in summer. She folded one leg under the other and propped her heel on the cushion’s edge. “Trinity finally got news from the Black King. It took her nine trips to Winrun before he’d even see her. When she got an audience, all he said was we were on our own.”
“You’re leaving off the suspicious part.” Eryx perched on the sofa arm beside Lexi. “He also said no actions had been taken without a balancing sacrifice and that we should heed our individual Spiritu until something changes.”
“What the fuck is that supposed to mean?” Ludan said.
Eryx huffed out an ironic laugh. “Exact same thing I said. Given all our other little chats with them, I’m suspicious.”
Beside him, Brenna crossed her arms and ran her palms up and down the backs of her arms.
Instinctively, he pulled her in front of him and ran his hands along the same path, pulling her back against his chest. “As allies go, they’re pretty useless.”
“I don’t know. They helped me find Lexi.” Eryx’s gaze dropped to Ludan’s hands anchored on Brenna’s shoulders. “Matter of fact, they seem to be working miracles all over the place.”
Lexi ducked her head and covered her mouth, but not before Ludan caught her grin.
Eryx didn’t bother to hide his, and it was way too smug.
Damn it all. Ludan dropped his hands and stalked to the oversized chair opposite Lexi, sinking onto the thick cushion and fisting his hands on the armrest. “So, what’s the favor?”
“We got a ruling from the council,” Eryx said. “Full dispensation on Angus’s memories. As soon as the verdict came down, Angus got real mouthy, sharing details on Serena and her dearly departed, but I’m not buying it. I want his memories. They’ve assigned an ellan for the job, but I want you. I need someone I can trust. Someone who’ll know what to look for.”
“No.” Brenna glared at Ludan. “You can’t. You know what it does to you.”
Shit.
He shook his head only enough to send her the message she was stepping into territory she shouldn’t.
“No,” she said anyway. “You can’t do it. It hurts you.”
The room got scary quiet, every gaze rooted on Ludan.
Eryx’s was the heaviest. “You want to tell me what she’s talking about?”
“It’s not important.”
“The heck if it isn’t.” The same confidence Brenna had shown in the kitchen minutes before revved back into top gear, and damn it was hot. If it weren’t for the mountainous pile of worms he had to wrestle back in their can, he’d prod her a little more just for the chance to feel her fire.
Lexi cut into their heated starefest. “Actually, you going with Eryx could be a good thing. You can go to Eden for a recharge, and Brenna and I can do some girl time. Shopping, nails, movies. You know, spend money and chitchat.”
“No,” Ludan said. “She needs protection.”
> “Of course she does.” Lexi waved his concern off like it was no big deal. “Jagger will be with us, and—”
“Jagger’s your somo. He’ll protect you first, not Brenna.”
Lexi rolled her eyes and smirked at Eryx. “Which is why I was about to say we brought Wes and Troy, too. Seriously, Ludan. You need the time in Eden. One night. That’s all. We’ll stay with her the whole time. And no offense, but shopping with me will be a whole lot more fun than it ever could be with you.”
Brenna padded up beside him, her voice low. Though in the tiny room, Eryx and Lexi couldn’t miss it. “You should go. If you need the boost, then you should do it.” She glanced at Eryx. “But I still think you should talk to him about the other.”
Eryx narrowed his eyes, way too many questions piling up behind his scowl.
Opting for diversion, Ludan focused on Lexi. “She’s supposed to spend the day with her mom. The three of us were going out to dinner. How are you going to explain three warriors?”
Lexi grinned, not the least bit daunted. “I’ll come up with something. Besides, compared to you, Wes, Troy, and Jag look like choirboys.”
Ludan shoved to his feet and paced a handful of steps away, staring out the window overlooking downtown Orlando. It didn’t make sense. His whole life he’d gone wherever and whenever Eryx wanted and never gave it a second thought. But now it felt like someone had poured concrete in his boots and snatched away his favorite toy. He twisted enough to meet Brenna’s gaze. “You’ll stay with Wes and Troy?”
Brenna nodded, though she didn’t look like she enjoyed the idea any more than he did.
“Geez, Ludan.” Lexi stood and wiggled her fingers toward the door. “Relax. Go recharge and work your mojo with Eryx. We’ve got this.”
Easy for her to say. Within five minutes the voices would be full throttle, and that darker, angry part of himself would be a raging animal bent on self-destruction. Fuck, just the idea of being away from her made him jumpy.
But Eryx was right. If he didn’t recharge, he couldn’t protect her. “Get Wes and Troy up here. I want their vow before I go.”
Ludan stepped out of the portal back to Eden, expecting to find the training center where Angus was detained, but finding the castle gardens instead. “I thought we were going to scan Angus.”
“Tomorrow.” Eryx strode toward the main path that wound through the flowers and the wrought-iron gazebo covered in ivy. “Today you rest and give me answers.”
“I thought—”
“You thought you’d scan Angus and hightail it back without juicing up first. So, you juice first, then you scan Angus.” He spared Ludan an angry glance. “I’ve been where you’re at, or have you forgotten?”
“You didn’t walk away.”
“No. I brought Lexi with me and put my throne at risk. Believe me, brother. I get it.”
Ludan clamped his mouth shut. Much as it pained him to admit it, Eryx was right. He needed energy, and Brenna would be fine with Wes and Troy. They were elites. Smart and deadly.
He glanced at Eryx. “You hear about more humans getting surprise tours of Eden?”
All he got in answer was a quick nod.
Weird. Eryx might get pissed, but he seldom got tight-lipped. Not when it concerned his race. “Any updates on Serena’s link?”
“Not a thing.”
“If she’s the one taking people to Eden, she can’t be in zeolite.”
Eryx took the stairs up to the veranda two at a time, still not weighing in.
“Ian tell you about the new promises their guide is making on the tours?”
That one at least struck a nerve, drawing a grumble before Eryx answered. “Yeah, I heard about the pending revelation. Can’t wait.”
“You think there’s any chance she’s dead?”
Eryx waved a hand toward his and Lexi’s private office. The double doors flew wide with far more force than necessary. “We couldn’t get that lucky. And I’d still want to see a dead body before I believed it.” He spun in front of his desk and crossed his arms. “You seem eager to talk, so let’s talk. Tell me what Brenna meant about your gift.”
Fuck.
Ludan halted a good twenty feet away and, for the first time in his life, gave serious thought to going AWOL. “That’s between me and Brenna.”
“Like histus it is. If something I’ve asked you to do for years endangers you, it’s very much between you and me. Now talk.”
He stared back at Eryx, scrambling for something, anything he could say that wouldn’t leave his skeleton jangling in broad daylight. Nothing came. Just white noise and a barely couched need to fidget. “The memories don’t leave me.”
Eryx stayed locked in place, waiting.
Praise the Great One, how was he supposed to explain this and not sound like a pussy? “I hear them all the time. They’re always on. Loud. Like one of those stereo stores in Evad with every radio and TV turned to a different station.”
Eryx uncoiled his arms and leaned back on the desk’s edge, his hands fisting the edge. “And you never thought it important I should know this?”
“What would you have done?”
He huffed out an ironic laugh. “I’d have quit asking you to do it.”
“Exactly.” Out of nowhere, Brenna’s bravado this morning blazed through his thoughts. How proud and uncompromising she’d been about offering her gift. Funny how he’d been guilty of the same thing, only for about a hundred and thirty years longer. “I do it because it helps you. I vowed my life to protect yours. A little noise in my head is nothing in comparison.”
“You don’t face down the grim reaper every day.” Eryx frowned and hung his head. “No wonder you never sleep. Or talk.” His head snapped up. “That’s it, isn’t it? You can’t because you can’t get a word or dream in edgewise.”
Ludan shrugged and stuffed his hands in his pockets. “Something like that.”
Eryx glared and drummed his thumb against the desktop. After thirty or more seconds that felt like a year, he pushed upright and stalked around his desk. “You’re not scanning Angus. I’ll have the ellan go first, then I’ll follow up.”
“Bullshit.”
Dropping to his chair, Eryx picked a big leather book up from the center and plunked it off to one side. “Bullshit is what’s stored in that head of yours. Give me one good reason why I should let you at Angus. Or at anyone after what you’ve withheld?”
“Brenna.” The second it came out, the shield he’d kept around himself and his emotions wavered, and he wished like histus he could take it back.
Eryx raised that imperial fucking eyebrow and stared him down. “What about Brenna?” The way he said it, Ludan wasn’t sure if Eryx was prepped to rip Ludan’s head off or ready to take her out.
“I don’t hear them when I’m with her. They’re silent.”
One second and Eryx’s whole demeanor shifted, the tension and anger morphing into shocked, almost pitiful understanding.
Ludan ambled to the window behind Eryx’s desk, the dregs of all he’d kept from his friend eking out with every step. “I told you there wasn’t anything between us.” Nothing more than his overactive imagination and wishful thinking.
The worn leather covering Eryx’s chair groaned as he shifted. “It might have been how things started between the two of you, but that’s not what it is anymore. Lexi and I were in the room with you for less than an hour and I could see it. Sense it. A stranger could have done the same. Is it so damned hard for you to comprehend there might be something more for you with her than just quiet?”
He wished that were the case. Maybe if he hadn’t seen the things he’d seen, or done the things he’d done, it would be different. “I don’t even deserve the quiet she gives me. I sure don’t deserve more.”
“Ludan.” Not a request for attention, but a command.
Ludan sucked in a lungful of air and faced his malran.
“I’ve never met a man more deserving. But if you keep hiding behind
excuses, you’ll never know for sure.”
Chapter 19
Brenna ambled beside her mother through another huge department store surrounded by endless racks of colorful outfits while Lexi scouted other sections still in earshot. Like yesterday, Abby kept a tight grip on Brenna’s hand and cast frequent glances as if checking to see if the contact was real.
Brenna didn’t mind. If anything, the connection grounded her. Anchored her amidst the mall’s noise and chaos and reminded her the past was truly behind her. “I remember us shopping.”
Her mother halted and caught her breath.
“I hated the clothes,” Brenna said, “and my feet were always tired by the time we left, but I loved hiding in the clothes racks to see if you could find me.”
Tears welled in Abby’s eyes, and a shaky smile stretched into place. “You remember that?”
Nodding, Brenna scoured her memories for more details, tiny nuggets she’d tucked safely out of Maxis’s reach. “I remember you called them our special days. We got cinnamon rolls from some diner near our house, and you’d let me pick music from the jukebox.”
Abby laughed, her gaze trained on the shiny industrial tile even though her thoughts seemed years away. “You always picked the same one. Some boy band that drove the waitresses crazy, especially so early in the morning.”
She remembered that, too. The name and the band were just fuzzy scraps now, but the way she’d danced beside the table had made everyone around them laugh.
“You were so bright,” Abby said. “So full of life and happy.”
Where she wasn’t now. Brenna understood the unspoken ending her mother held back. More than Abby knew. But she was working her way back, one minute at a time.
Shaking off the weighty mood, she refocused on the bold colors and dizzying noise around her. A headless white mannequin stood perched on a display, its arms positioned in a way that said, “Look at me!” The teal shirt it featured had a peasant design with pretty crocheted edges, a relaxed almost wistful feel that fit her mood. The jeans, however, had rhinestones on the pockets and ratty tears above one knee.
Eden's Deliverance (The Eden Series Book 4) Page 15
