Grabbing four fish of his own, Jeff tosses them in the charcoal of the fire after cleaning them. Moments later, the room begins to fill with a mouthwatering aroma. When their done, Jeff pulls them from the fire to cool, then takes his time peeling the skin from the first fish and hands it to me.
“Eat,” he instructs.
He doesn’t have to tell me twice. I bite into the warm flaky fish and groan. I may not have cared much for seafood before the Flash, but now it’s delicious. He pulls the other three from the fire and starts to eat. Halfway through my fish, I notice Asher sitting quietly on his bed, watching us. I almost choke on my selfishness. I look down at the rest of my fish longingly.
“Can he have the rest of my fish?” I ask.
Jeff doesn’t stop eating when he replies, “No.”
“I’m fine, Lil. You need to eat,” Asher offers, agreeing with Jeff.
I glare at him. “You have to eat too.”
“No talk. Eat,” Jeff growls, annoyed.
He sees that I’m about to protest again, but shuts me up by throwing over one of his three fish. It lands about an inch out of reach, only tormenting Asher. He reaches for it several times before giving up and sitting back on his heels.
I stop eating and glare at Jeff.
His yellowed skin and red eyes are infected, but the smirk in his expression is more human than ever. He huffs, but then moves to flick the fish close enough for Asher to reach it. Moments later, we’re all eating in silence, savoring the flavor.
By the time we’re done, I’m stuffed. My eyes are drifting, ready for a long nap to pull me under. My knee’s still swollen, but feeling much better. Asher informed me that I’ll have to ice it several times a day for a couple of days, but to also stay off it for a while. Even after walking on it, he said it will take about two months to heal completely. The snow has us on lockdown, but knowing I can’t run because of an injury is worse. Given the opportunity to escape, I couldn’t take it unless someone carried me. We wouldn’t get far. They’re fast.
Jeff nudges and grunts at me.
“Hmm?” I mumble, realizing I’m drifting off.
My eyes remain closed as he repositions me, propping up my knee. When he’s done with me, he adds more wood to the fire. The flames grow brighter, warming my face. I’ve become accustomed with his nightly sleeping routine. He slides behind me, pulling me to him, keeping me closest to the fire. His arm is a solid band around my waist as he nuzzles the crook of my neck. One of his favorite things to do is smell me, especially during the night. He groans quietly against my skin, as if my scent is irresistible. Objecting is futile, I learned that on day one.
~~~~~
Weeks pass.
Or what I think is weeks.
I nap regularly, seemingly more tired as each day passes. I’ve taken to counting the amount of times the entire encampment sleeps, attempting to track the time that passes. I’m probably off on my count, but if I’m right, I’ve lived in this cave for about two and a half months. I swallow the lump in my throat, shoving down my dread at the thought. My eyes warm and water. I miss my baby. My heart threatens to tear from my chest when I think about her— what she’s doing, or how big she’s getting. A sob breaks free.
Quickly, I wipe the tears out of my eyes. The warmth next to me is missing, signaling Jeff has left again this morning. Relief sweeps through me as I sit up.
Asher is watching me from his bed. “Are you all right?” he whispers.
Glancing around the room, I notice the infected and humans are all missing. Nodding, I answer, “Yes. Where are they?” My heart is pounding. The last time we were all left alone, Becky’s clan came to visit. Are they back?
“Outside. You can hear them if you’re quiet. They took the others out too, probably to stretch. They do this every month or two, take our chains off and have us move around. We last longer.”
“Oh,” I mumble, not sure if lasting longer is good or bad at this point.
“What were you dreaming about?” he questions.
A small smile finds my lips. “My daughter. I miss her.” Another tear finds its way past my lashes.
He’s quiet for a moment. “How old is she?”
“She turned four a few days before I was taken.” Remembering how fun her day was causes my heart to ache.
“I have a son. He was a month old when I was taken,” Asher reveals, his eyes heavy with burden.
I open my mouth to ask about the baby and his family, when shuffling and grunts fill the entrance of the cave. Greg and Wendy stumble in first, covered in snow and practically blue from the cold. I stand on my now healed knee, moving over to help them, reaching Wendy first.
“What the hell? Why are you covered in snow?” Her teeth are chattering so hard, she can’t speak. I look over at Greg, who isn’t fairing any better. I move them to their beds and begin to add more wood to the fire.
My knee healed after a couple of weeks, but still gets sore if I don’t use it regularly, which works in my favor. Jeff never put the chain back on my ankle. It’s not as if I can run from the cave with the amount of snow outside. I would likely lose both of my feet in the best-case scenario. The fire is blazing high when Abbey stumbles inside. I rush to her side, catching her when she falls.
When I right her, I’m shoved out of the way, hard. My knee is weak and not prepared for the sudden movement, giving out, and sending me to the ground. A squeak of pain leaves my lips. Her infected has always hated me, lurking for opportunities to hurt me. His smirk of satisfaction leaves goose bumps across my body in warning. Do not turn your back.
I pry myself off the ground, trying not to show any weakness. Abbey’s off-limits. The infected won’t allow me to help her. Instead, I limp over to Greg and Wendy, covering each of them with a blanket. Rough hands redirect me toward my bed. I begin to protest, but I’m met with Jeff’s glare to stay quiet.
“No,” he growls, setting me firmly down on my own bed, glaring for a moment before moving to my chain. He picks is up and comes toward me.
“No, please,” I beg. I can’t have that thing back on me. “I only wanted to help. They’re freezing. I wasn’t trying to leave.”
He stops and looks at Greg and Wendy shivering on their beds. He decides my answer is enough and tosses the chain aside. He places one hand on my shoulder, glaring at me, telling me not to move. I don’t argue. Jeff may have hurt me when he was still partially human, but he’s never laid a hand on me now that he’s fully infected. He’s done the complete opposite and protected me. The dynamic of the situation makes no sense, but I wasn’t going to question his motives.
I glance over at Asher, catching his eyes for a moment. Jeff allows us moments of conversation, but only rarely. There are times when all the intelligent infected leave us with the inhumane ones, the ones we believed eradicated. Learning now, there are two distinct kinds of infected. You were either smart and ruthless like Jeff, learning from your surroundings, or inhumane and unintelligent, like the decomposing infected in the back of the cave. We have four smart ones, including Jeff, and nine putrid infected. The smarter infected hold beds next to the fire, and human slaves. Abbey, Gary, and Wendy all have an infected to wait on hand and foot. During the winter months, the Infected mostly ignored them, sometimes to the point of death. The infected rotate the humans, taking a couple out on each hunting trip. Gary’s still recovering from the last time he went out two days ago. Everyone except me works into this rotation, Jeff opting to take Asher instead.
The smarter infected leave the unintelligent to watch over us during hunting trips. They’re interested in approaching us, you can see it in their savage awareness. They may be the lower class and want us as food, but they’re also smart enough to know never to touch us. Their entire hierarchy is set up like a pack of wolves. You have the alpha, Jeff. The betas, in the other three intelligent infected. Even the unintelligent are like subordinates. The longer I’m held here, the more I comprehend, but with each question answered, another spawn
s in its place.
Jeff is cold and calculated. He’ll never let me go willingly. A vise clenches my heart with the realization. For the last couple months, the thought of never returning hadn’t entered my mind. Now, for the first time, the possibility seems to exist.
The heaviness has me swaying as I fall back onto my pallet.
I can hear a worried voice calling after me, then a large hand pulling me up and placing wetness to my mouth. The moisture is too good to ignore, as I suck down its coolness.
My eyes flutter open to Jeff’s yellowish, red-veined skin and blackened eyes. I’ve seen him too many times to flinch. “What happened?” I touch my forehead.
Jeff scrunches his brows, unsure of how to answer. He turns to Asher, gesturing to me, waiting for him to explain.
“You fainted. Are you all right?” Asher’s voice shakes with worry.
“Yeah…I think so. My eating is different here, and with all the stress…” I trail off, leaving my sentence hanging.
Asher nods, understanding. The tension in his shoulders reveal his concern.
Cool liquid brings me back as Jeff continues to shovel snow into my mouth. The ice melts and its heavenly. Opening my eyes, I glance to where he laid the remaining snow. Realizing how thirsty I am, I grab a handful and suck it down, not being able to get enough.
“More,” I huff out in-between mouthfuls.
Jeff grunts at me, but exits the cave to grab more snow. He’s back moments later and I’m scooping another handful.
“This is delicious. Thank you,” I whisper around the ice.
Jeff grunts again and finds a place to sit next to me by the fire. He leans back against the rock below the pallet we share and closes his eyes, relaxing. When he sits likes this, it’s hard to tell he’s infected. He still possesses all his dark hair and muscled physique. His skin has taken on a greenish hue, hardly noticeable in the dim light. Nothing like the subordinates of the group. They’re decaying in front of our eyes; the perfect example of the living dead. Our own modern-day zombies.
Chapter 9
Ian
The day has finally come.
“You ready for this?” Michael asks. He’s smiling like a loon.
“Damn straight!”
Azami laughs at my excitement and claps. “You can do it, Daddy!”
James laughs and swoops her over his shoulder, sending her into another fit of giggles.
Spirits are high. Today’s the day I walk again.
“You’re lucky that all your skin’s healed. I’d suggest doubling up on the socks for at least a month because the new skin will remain sore for a while longer. Your shoes are going to take getting used to again. Make sure you don’t wear them too long, you’ll get blisters. Build yourself up slowly,” he warns, knowing I can’t wait to get out there and begin my search.
Over three fucking months she’s been gone. I’m not waiting another day. All I can do is think about her. What’s happening to her? How many times has it happened to her? The thoughts are enough to drive me insane. My breathing increases as scenarios flash before my closed lids. My hands turn twitchy, wanting to lash out.
“Ian… you all right?” Mason leans in, sensing my internal chaos.
Shaking my head, I loosen the stream of torture behind my eyes. I can’t let the what ifs drag me down. They’ll drive me crazy before I can find her. “I’m good. Get over here and help me up.”
I reach out to Michael and Mason as they help me to my feet. I’ve stretched my legs every day, but without being able to stand on them, they’re weak, like a baby fawn. I stumble a few times before standing on my own. James and Azami are cheering me on as I balance. Hands on my knees, I’m able to steady myself, and smile. We’re out in the sleeping tunnel next to our room, drawing a crowd. Several people have come out of their rooms to watch me grow some balls and walk again.
“Stand up straight. Once you have your balance, try taking a step,” Michael urges.
I do as he instructs and stand up. The simple action courses satisfaction through my veins as I take a step forward. My feet are tender surrounded by my boots, the rough material scraping against my newly formed skin. The thick socks I’m wearing prevent any real damage. A few steps in and my bearings begin to return.
Azami steps up next to me and takes my hand in hers. “Hang onto my hand, Daddy. I’ll help you walk.”
My heart expands. “Thanks, Pumpkin.”
She walks with me slowly down to the end of the hall and then back. I’m exhausted and breathing heavily by the time we return to our starting spot. I lean against the wall to collect myself, as Quinn and Deagon hoot and holler their congratulations. The excitement is catchy, my adrenaline is pumping, making me feel like I can do anything. I can’t do much at this point but walk from point A to point B, and as much as I hate to admit it, Michaels right, I’m still going to have to wait. Building up my stamina is going to take time; time Lillie can’t afford.
Azami tugs on my hand until I look down at her. “She’s strong, Daddy. She’ll be otay.”
My heart expands twice its normal size. “I know, Pumpkin.”
Her smile reaches her sparkly, bright blue eyes. A single tear drips from her eye and rolls down her rosy pink cheek. “I miss Mommy,” she whispers.
“I miss her too, Pumpkin.”
As much as I try, I know I’m unsuccessful in hiding all my thoughts through our touch, but I also can’t deprive her of it either. Instead, I pick her up and cuddle her to me, something I haven’t done in a very long time while standing. I’m always sitting as she climbs on me in our room. Now that I can finally stand again, I realize how much I missed this and needed it at the same time. Holding her hurts my sore feet, but it’s worth every damn second. Before I know it, her breathing turns heavy and snores begin to fill the silence.
Quiet laughter fills the tunnel. Naveen and Sophie have their curtain tied back, watching the fun, as baby Gage walks back and forth between them. Deagon, Quinn, and James stand next to their doorway with Michael and Mason, watching me like hawks, always the voices of reason.
“Here, let me take her.” Sophie stands next to me, her arms extended. “You need to practice walking. You look silly out there.” Gage giggles. “I’ll lay her down with us. I’ll even make sure Gage doesn’t jump on her this time.”
The picture she paints is comical, making me laugh. She’s right, of course. If I’m going to gain my balance and strength back, walking back and forth once isn’t going to do the trick.
I turn to Michael after Sophie takes Azami. “If I work every day, how long will it take me to get back out there?” A plethora of emotions pass over his face. Annoyance and anger for knowing how much I’m going to push recovery, but also understanding and sadness, because he’d do the exact same thing.
“Safely…at least a month,” he finally replies. Knowing I don’t like the answer, he cuts me off. “You can’t rush this. I understand you want her back, we all do, but if you rush this, you could cause more damage to your feet. What happens if you can’t walk for another three months because you push too hard?” He waits for me to interrupt. This time, I stay silent, giving him permission to continue. “There’s still a good five feet of snow out there, even more if you count the snowdrifts. Your skin may have a sensitivity to cold. If you wear your boots more than a couple hours a day, you’ll blister at this point and lose the progress you’ve made.”
Understanding, I nod. “I get it, I do, but you’ve got to realize, sitting here isn’t an option for me. If I can’t go out there yet, then I’m going to prepare for the moment that I can.”
“Let us help you,” Mason cuts in. James, Quinn, and Deagon come to stand next to us, listening. “We can work with you, get you back into shape. Plus, we can tell you when to stop and break. This way, you won’t overdo it. Michael’s right, we can’t afford a setback. She’d been gone too long.” His thoughts drift a moment. I know where they go because I can sense them wafting off him. What’s happening
to her? Is she okay?
“We’re all here.” James steps to the side of me and slaps my shoulder in support, bringing me back to the present.
“Thanks, brother.” I clasp his hand on my shoulder for a moment, then look to the men surrounding me. “All of you, thank you. Thank you for stepping up with Azami and for helping me. You’re all my brothers. My family. Thanks for everything.”
One by one, they all place their hands on James’s and step into me.
“We’re with you. We’ll find her,” Mason says.
A chorus of agreement and support goes around the room.
I clear my throat of emotion. The room is getting thick with it. “All right, let’s stop hugging this shit out and get down to business.”
Laughter sounds around me as they slap my back, chorusing their agreement.
“Tonight, we’re going to concentrate on walking. It’s taken several weeks to heal enough to get you back on your feet. Becoming steady is the first building block to your goal.” Everything Michael says is smart. He’ll never guide me in the wrong direction.
~~~~~
Azami is up before me most days. I can hear her shuffling around in her bed above me, humming a soft tune. I turn, taking the moment to watch her. Since Lillie’s kidnapping, she’s quieter. She doesn’t laugh as much, but she still has her moments, like these. Her eyes shine bright, but the dark circles that wrap around them let me know she’s still having trouble sleeping without her mother.
“What’re you doing, Pumpkin?” My voice is sleepy.
Her blue eyes find mine and smile. She holds up a small piece of paper. “I dwew Momma a picture. She can hang it up when she gets home.”
She explains who each person is, having drawn everyone in the cave. There’s something she loves about everyone, baby Gage being her favorite. She tells me several stories about what they did last week, each story I’ve heard many times. Her chatter stirs James, as he groans through his morning stretch.
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