I reach down to pick up the fish when Jeff stops me.
The texture of his hand is rough, like sandpaper, but his grip is gentle. “Hot,” he reminds me.
I nod my understanding. Get your shit together, Lillie. I mentally slap myself in the back of the head. Jeff finishes his fish a while later, and deeming mine cool enough to eat, he nudges it toward me again. I’ve collected myself enough to begin to process my situation. Reaching down, I grab my fish and begin to eat. It’s delicious, and I finish the entire thing in record time.
A soft chuckle sounds to my left.
Asher.
I search him out, anxious to see that he’s okay. After scanning him, I see a deep bruise beginning to form over his left eye where Jeff landed his blow. Panic must read in my eyes when they lock onto his, because he tilts his head, signaling he’s okay.
A relieved breath leaves my lips, attracting Jeff’s attention. He looks between the both of us, but remains silent, eating his third fish. He notices my food is gone and rips open another fish and hands it to me.
Before I take it, I glance back at Asher, noticing he’s not eaten yet. “Can he have one?” I ask quietly.
He growls, “No,” the word clipped.
“But he helped get them,” I protest.
“No.” The same sharp reply.
“It’s okay, Lil. I’m fine,” Asher tries to reassure me.
“No talk!” Jeff shouts at him, startling Wendy from her sleep with a yelp.
“But he won’t have energy to help tomorrow if he doesn’t eat,” I counter.
“No.” Jeff continues his stubbornness.
“Lil, really, I’m fine.” Asher keeps his voice low, as if Jeff won’t be able to hear him.
“You should still eat,” I argue.
Jeff growls out his annoyance at our constant defiance. He picks up a fish and chucks it at Asher, slapping him in the face. “No talk,” he snaps, but there’s amusement in his voice.
I turn toward Jeff, my mouth dropping open from shock. He smirks at my expression. He meant to hit him with that fish. “Well, that was rude,” I say.
Asher laughs under his breath, a weird camaraderie in the moment.
Glancing across the room, all the unintelligent infected are in a pile in the front of the cave, fast asleep. Farmer Joe, Gary, and Abbey are all sleeping as well. Big Bully has his eyes locked on me in a threatening manner. His gaze is unsettling, but I school my features to relay nothing. He scares the ever-loving-daylights out of me, but he doesn’t need to know what kind of reaction he solicits.
He smirks at me, letting me know he sees right through my bravado.
Instead of dwelling on my situation, I finish my fish and curl into a ball on our pallet. Shortly after, Jeff lays my bearskin over me and cuddles into my body. He tucks his nose into the side of my neck and takes his nightly scenting, rubbing my stomach in the process. The small action leaves me feeling violated.
What am I going to do now?
~~~~~
That same question flows through my head for several days after the pregnancy discovery. What am I going to do now? It’s a very good question, because I have no idea of the answer. The weakness and lethargy should have tipped me off about the bun in my oven, or the bump itself. My period has always been hit or miss since the Flash, so I didn’t think anything of it when I didn’t have one for several months. My heart soars when I think of Ian’s reaction. His excitement will go through the roof. I try to keep these thoughts few and far between, since I don’t know when I’ll see him again.
The cave has a different atmosphere now. Every human is now aware of my condition. The infected treat me no differently, indicating they all seem to have known of my condition to begin with, explaining why they always sniff me. Abbey hasn’t looked in my direction since the day she declared her dislike of me. Asher acts as if he’s walking on eggshells. He’s become less defiant toward our captors, trying to gain favoritism so he can stay next to me.
I’m becoming stir-crazy. Jeff takes Asher with him almost every time he leaves the cave, leaving no time for us to talk, and Jeff doesn’t allow us to speak often in his presence. Wendy speaks to me occasionally, but she’s content to hum to herself. Mr. Mom allows her to do more than the others. She’s still chained up, so it’s not as if she can wander off. He doesn’t have any real concern. Gary stays to himself. He doesn’t talk to us often, and never to Farmer Joe. He does what his infected requires of him and nothing more. Abbey’s been silent since the day she shoved me down, not speaking to us or Big Bully. He shoves her aside, doesn’t feed her, and has drug her back into the cave on several occasions, each time looking to me to see if I’ll rise to her defense. He likes hurting her to punish me. She was right, he’s doing this for my benefit. Since he can’t touch me himself to inflict injury, he’ll impose it on her to get what he wants from me—pain.
After days of freaking out internally, I can’t handle it anymore. I’m seconds away from snapping. I have to go outside to find fresh air. Mr. Mom and Wendy are the only ones left in the cave, as it’s their rotation to watch over me. They’re both sleeping in late, the others having woken up and left to catch our breakfast. I watch Mr. Mom for several minutes before I work up enough courage to tiptoe past them and toward the cave exit. There are no shoes left, so I won’t be traveling far in the snow. I’m not planning to run away, but it does cross my mind. The snow won’t allow me to go far. My heart drops, thinking about leaving the other humans in the cave. I don’t know if I have it in me to leave them behind.
I’m now standing next to the exit, having quietly maneuvered around Mr. Mom and Wendy. I take one last look behind me as I slip my wool socks off my feet. My heart is pounding in my throat as I step down the small tunnel.
The exit opens only a handful of steps away from the mouth of the cave, twisted around the corner, blocking most of the wind. I pause for a moment, remembering my knee bending and scraping across the threshold as Becky drug me toward an awaiting death. Now my heart is pounding for an entirely new reason. Jeff gave her to the unintelligent infected, but that doesn’t mean she’s dead. What if she decides to come back for me, especially when they’re all away?
More thoughts plague me, causing me further doubt. If it were just me taking a gander, I might wander farther, but I have the baby to think about now. Placing myself in such a dangerous situation without backup isn’t the smartest of ideas, but how else am I going to find an escape? There’s no way I can have a baby here with the infected.
A cool breeze hits my face with my final two steps. I don’t move far enough to get my toes in the snow, but enough to breathe in the fresh air. The cave is putrid with body odor, making it unbearable. The clean scent has me gulping down lungful’s of air. A moment of serenity and calm envelopes me, wrapping me in an embrace, and I somehow know Ian is searching for me. The sensation goes on until the cold begins seeping into my body, starting with me feet, since the ground is solid and freezing beneath my skin.
Opening my eyes, I still see a winter wonderland, but nothing like the feet of snow that blanketed the ground upon my arrival. The limbs of the trees are still hanging heavily with the snow’s weight. The ground is impenetrable from the frozen air, but fresh and crisp to breathe. A cool realization slams into me again… Impossible.
The overwhelming sense of defeat washes over me. Escaping is a task that’s daunting all on its own, let alone attempting while freezing temperatures run rampant and snow layers the ground. I’ve no protective clothing, water, or food. Plus, my Sweet Pea isn’t worth the risk, unless I’m sure I can survive. My heart sinks to my stomach with the understanding of the mission before me. Not only am I worrying about my own escape, but how I’m going to get the others out as well.
The sun rises higher in the sky as I deliberate. I enjoy the sun’s soft flickering rays that light rainbows off every surface. The breeze picks up and tosses snow like glitter into the sky. I take one last deep breath and turn to reenter the c
ave.
A snarl greets my newly presented back. I stiffen, not daring to breathe. I knew venturing this far out of the cave presented a risk, but I decided not to listen to that internal voice of reason. Dumbass.
Slowly, I turn to face my predator.
I recognize him as one of the unintelligent decomposing infected in our cave. He watches me at times in the back of the room, always with interest, but never bold enough to come forward. I glance behind him and find he’s on his own. The rest of the pack must still be out collecting fish. They left a while ago, and without a way of tracking time inside the cave, I have no idea how long they’ve been gone.
I take a step backwards, attempting to subtly escape, but the infected matches my step and follows. He’s licking his lips and observing me as if I’m his main course and he hasn’t eaten in days. Asher said that the smarter infected mate with their own kind, but he said nothing about the unintelligent ones. The infected licks his lips again, not seeming to have any trouble with the fact that I’m still human, and if the past is any indicator, I know what’s coming next.
There’s a tension in the air that’s about to snap. He makes the first move and launches himself toward me, fingers splayed like claws. Steadying my feet, I gain the best purchase I can barefooted. I keep my arms up, protecting my middle the best I can, while still defending myself.
“Mr. Mom!” I cry for help. I know he doesn’t know the made-up name I gave him, but he’d hear me all the same.
The infected slams into me, knocking me back and almost to the ground. One arm is protecting my stomach, while the other balls into a fist and smashes it into his face. I hear a crunch, but the pain in my hand tells me it might be my own bones. The unexpected ache distracts me, causing me to trip over a root in the ground, landing hard on the frozen dirt.
A loud roar comes from within the cave, only increasing in volume when he reaches the outside. He processes the scene for only a second before stepping in and backhanding the infected, sending him sliding a few feet across the ground. Mr. Mom pulls me to my feet with one swift yank. My back hits the wall, knocking my next breath from my lungs. Anger’s shining in his eyes as he stares me down.
Behind him, the infected rises back to his feet, saliva running from his mouth as he poises to attack. My eyes widen seconds before giving my warning, when Asher appears behind the infected. My panic tips off Mr. Mom and he twists back around to the scene. There’s no reaction time, as Asher snaps the neck of the infected, and watches him drop lifelessly to the ground.
Asher stares at the fallen infected for a moment before raising his eyes and locking them on mine. “You all right?”
My breath is sawing in and out of my lungs. “I’m fine. Where did you come from?” None of the others are with him.
“The pond we fish from isn’t far from here. I heard you yell for Mr. Mom.” His lip quirks. “I took off. I’m sure Jeff is on his way.”
A growl sounds from behind Asher, as Jeff skids into the caves entrance, almost knocking into me. A startled yelp leaves my lips in surprise. He stands defensively for a moment, gauging the scene around him. When he sees the infected on the ground, he stands and takes the remaining steps to me. He examines me without saying anything, looks back to Asher, and then the infected on the ground. Finally, locking eyes with Mr. Mom, a silent conversation passes between them. They’ve done this before, but nothing to this depth. They’re literally having a conversation without words.
Mr. Mom turns to look at me, then Jeff’s eyes follow. I have a feeling this part of the conversation is about me. Jeff takes in my bare feet, then looks up to my chattering teeth. He shakes his head no and turns back to Mr. Mom, as if he were answering a question. Mr. Mom doesn’t like the rebuttal, growling to the reply.
Asher moves to my side. He’s careful not to touch me, as Jeff is tracking his every move. “Can I take her inside?” he asks. Jeff may not speak often, but he understands quite a bit.
He grunts and nods his head toward the cave, giving his permission.
Asher guides me without touching toward the entrance. They’re arguing about me. I don’t want to do anything to jeopardize the amount of freedoms he’s given me; they’re the only way I can formulate a plan of escape.
Before we pass them to enter the cave, I stop. “I wasn’t trying to escape. I needed fresh air because I couldn’t breathe. I even left my socks inside, warming by the door.” I point to my cold pink toes, trying to prove my point. There’s no way I can leave until the snow is completely gone. Even then, I require the perfect plan.
Mr. Mom huffs his annoyance but doesn’t appear to protest. Instead, he returns to the cave and his morning slumber.
Jeff stops Asher before he enters the cave. “Go,” he instructs, taking me by the arm and grabbing my socks from the ground. “Fish.” I’m unsure of his orders, but Asher seems to understand, as he takes one final look at me and heads back out into the snow.
“Come.” He pulls me gently back into the cave, next to our pallet.
He sets my socks down and quickly busies himself with the fire. When there’s a nice flame going, he pulls me closer and sits me down next to him. He grabs my ankles and places my feet close to the warmth, along with my socks. We sit quietly, warming my appendages. I glance over to Mr. Mom and catch him watching us out of the corner of his eye. He’s pretending to sleep, but he sees me watching him, and makes no move to stay hidden. It’s times like these that hit home the most; the new breed of infected have evolved. Mr. Mom and Jeff aren’t human any longer, but they’re also not blindingly ruthless either. Don’t get me wrong, they’ll tear you to pieces if angry enough, but they also have a lighter side. They plot their next moves with precision instead of crazed reactions.
Noise draws my thoughts to a close and redirects my attention to the front of the cave. The rest of the unintelligent infected file in, the smarter infected and the humans come in last. Asher has his shirt flipped inside out with the amount of fish he’s brought back. Gary and Abbey stumble onto their pallets, freezing. Asher’s a few feet from me when he finally glances up. He has blood dripping from the corner of his mouth, and a fresh gash over his already bruised face.
“What the hell happened?” I shout, jumping to my feet.
Asher’s eyes widen as I move toward him. “Stop,” he whispers.
Seconds later, Big Bully tosses him aside, causing him to toss the fish on the ground. “No talk,” Big Bully growls, menacingly. He’s waiting for me to foul up, asking for an excuse.
Jeff immediately steps between us, pulling me behind him, meeting Big Bully with his own deep, threatening growl. “Mine. No touch.”
Big Bully squares off with Jeff, pawing the ground like a bull ready to attack. They’re chests are puffing out, almost touching in their battle of wills. They’re so close that their noses may touch at any moment. Each of their eyes are searching the others, another silent conversation. Big Bully growls again and leers toward me, pointedly at my bare ankle. Jeff huffs and growls, but turns to look at me.
“What the hell?” I whisper to myself.
Jeff grunts again, but this time stalks over to me, grabbing my arm. He’s rougher than normal, dragging me over to where the boulder and my chain has sat untouched. He sits me down on the pallet coarsely as he reaches for the chain, about to reapply it to my ankle.
“No…please!” I scoot back against the wall.
“No.” His words are gruff. Whatever Big Bully said affected him enough to rechain me.
“Why though? I’ve not done anything!” I’m closer to crying than ever before. Being free is the only way I have to escape.
“No. Stop.” He pins my leg down to get the chain back on.
Glancing up, I see cold black eyes stare back at me. A small smirk lifts the side of Big Bully’s lip, pleased with the outcome of their standoff. Jeff has always challenged him regarding any decisions. What made this time different? I stop fighting and let Jeff hook the round metal against my skin.
/> A cry across the room pulls my eyes back to Big Bully. He’s taken Abbey by the hair, pulling her down to his level, sniffing her. His eyes blacken further, if that’s even possible, and purrs.
My chest squeezes tight as he reaches toward her and grabs her left breast, causing another startled cry to leave her lips. Breaking the stare down I have on Big Bully, I look to Abbey, who’s looking right at me. He squeezes her again and I move to stand.
The pleading expression on her face and the small shake of her head holds me still. No. It’ll only be worse if you help.
The silent words resound through my entire body. How can I sit here and do nothing? I didn’t think it possible, but the imploring look she’s giving me locks me in place. I’m raging inside to help her, but I know it’s impossible. A small tear leaks from the corner of my eye, signaling I’m winning my own battle, but hate the outcome. Growing up in foster care, there was always someone trying to take something from you. Being timid and small always placed me at a disadvantage. It took the end of the world for me to learn to fight back, and I never wanted to feel defenseless again, even if the person requiring help wasn’t me.
I wipe the small weakness off my cheek and turn away, one of the hardest things I’ve ever done, leaving her to defend herself. I crawl up on my pallet, knowing there’s nothing left here for me. I’m chained. No way to escape. A part of me wants to give up, until a butterfly frenzy flutters through my stomach. The unexpected rush reminds me of why I’ve got to fight with everything I am. My Sweet Pea depends on me, and I won’t let my baby down. I curl into a ball and hug my middle, hoping to find a peaceful nap.
~~~~~
I’m trailing my fingers across the fresh flowers. Everything is warm and fresh, spring finally taking over the winter that has left me cold. I’m walking through the trees, my feet bare for some reason. The thought crosses my mind moments before I reach a clearing and can see the entrance to my cave. I know I’m dreaming, but the overwhelming joy at seeing my home again is heart-stopping, especially when I see people outside.
EVOLVED Page 9
