I nod at all the other male doctors in the room, to make sure to include each of them. Some of them actually chuckle, and Jim Morestone says, "You're something else, Derek."
"At least I'm never boring," I agree.
Everyone looks like they can’t wait to hear what Elizabeth Jane has to say. And I can’t wait to see how the looks on their faces are going to change once she fills them in. I’m beginning to wish the conference room was equipped with a popcorn machine, because I know this going to be entertaining.
Chapter 31 – Derek
Before long, Mia returns, with Liz following her. I start to feel bad for dragging her in for questioning by these ignoramuses. I half expect her to be hanging her head down in shame, but she's looking at me with a naughty smirk on her adorable face, as if we’d rehearsed this part, although we hadn’t.
That's my girl.
I'm so proud of her right now. I realize how loyal she is to me and I want to do everything I can to be loyal to her in return. I've never felt this way for anyone else and I never even fucking knew that I could.
"Ms. Suttell," Jeff asks her, without even offering her a seat. "Sorry to bother you. We realize it's your first afternoon on the job, even though we didn't even know you were going to start working today. For just a couple of hours, after your class got out. We didn’t realize you were going to be working here at all."
The tone of his voice makes it clear that he’s not happy about any of these changes in circumstance.
"I'm sorry," Liz says, smiling pleasantly at his passive aggressive rudeness. "Is that a problem?"
"That depends," Jeff says. "On the nature of your relationship— if any—" he rushes to correct himself— "with Dr. Monroe."
"I see."
She still looks at him unflinchingly. Suddenly he looks nervous. I love how my little Liz can make a grown man— and a bully at that— flustered.
"I suppose that's our main question," he finally continues. "What, if anything, is your relationship with Dr. Monroe?"
"Why, he's my fiancé," Liz says, without missing a beat.
I want to get up and hug her. But I remain seated, with half a smile on my face, as if to say, "See? I told you so."
"Since when?" Mark demands.
She turns her polite smile towards him.
"Since just recently, actually," she says. And then she follows it up brilliantly. "Why? Is that a problem? I've only had a little time to review the employee handbook I just received, but I didn't see anything about someone's spouse or fiancée not being allowed to work here."
"It's not a problem if it's true," Jeff says. "But I still have my doubts."
"Come on now, calm down," Niles says, finally jumping to my defense. "You asked the girl a question and she answered it. What more do you want from her?"
"Details," Jeff says, nearly frothing at the mouth to prove me a liar. "He probably just told her to say they're engaged, to save his ass. Tell us when the wedding is," he demands of Liz.
I'm about to protest but without missing a beat, Liz answers.
"It's in two months," she says. "June 29th. I always did want a June wedding, Love.”
Now she smiles at me, and her cute little dimple makes me wish we were alone. Not to mention her quick wit and charm.
"There you have it," Niles says, convinced. "A June wedding."
"Where is this wedding going to be held?” Jeff demands.
Liz pauses, and only now do I start worrying.
Tell him we haven't ironed out the details, I try to say to her through telepathy. Not everyone knows where they're getting married yet. We could be venue shopping.
"Houghton Hotel, of course," she says, with a sassy little raise of her shoulder. "Where else is there to get married around here?"
I raise an eyebrow at her. Has she really planned all of this out? Or is she just this much of a good liar? She’s even got me wondering.
"They have the best weddings," she continues, not even batting an eyelash in my direction.
She sure is putting on a convincing show.
"But the one we're planning will far surpass all the rest. We're not doing the normal dove release. Instead, there will be two monkeys who are in love— they're an actual pair of monkeys in real life, isn't that cute?— who will perform for our guests while we take our first walk down the aisle as husband and wife.”
Jeff’s mouth is hanging open. And I can’t help but wonder: Where’s the damn popcorn when I need it?
“And forget about a horse drawn carriage to bring me to the ceremony,” Liz continues. “I'm going to be riding a hot air balloon, specially flown in from New Mexico for the occasion."
Wow.
She’s impressed even me, and I’m in on this fake wedding idea. But I certainly wasn’t in on all the elaborate details.
"All right, we get the point," Niles says. "There's going to be a big to do. The most unique and special wedding ever. We don't need to go through every item on your wedding to do list."
"I, for one, am rather intrigued and interested," Mia pipes up. "Do go on. I have a question about these details. What is your dress like?"
From the way her eyebrow is raised, I can tell she’s genuinely curious, rather than just trying to interrogate Liz like the men are.
"It's Berta, of course," Liz says.
"Well yes," Mia agrees. "Who else would you go with?"
"Exactly. It's the latest beaded lace and tulle ballgown. It’s called the Belle Rosa."
"Yes! I’ve heard of it,” Mia says.
Liz shoots me a look as if to say, “that’s impossible,” and now I’m sure she’s just making all of this up on the spot. There’s probably not a wedding dress called the Belle Rose, except in her very creative imagination.
“I saw Alison Brie wearing almost as nice of one, in Town & Country," Mia says. "Very nice choice."
"Well thank you," Liz says. "I'm sure you'll love to see it in person, Dr. Malone. You're all invited, of course."
"Oh, nice," Mia says, nodding her head approvingly. "I will most definitely be there."
"For the Berta," Liz says.
"And the hot air balloon," Mia admits. "And monkeys? Really?"
"You know it, girl," Liz says, beaming at her.
"All right," Jeff interrupts. "Well I, for one, have no idea if this girl is as full of shit as Monroe probably is, if she's as batty as her crazy mother—"
"Hey," I tell him. "Have some respect."
"It's okay," Liz shrugs. "I'm used to it. She is pretty batty. But I just found out that my dad's pretty normal, so at least only half of my genetics are defective.”
Her face turns soft and thoughtful, and I love how compassionate she is.
“Plus, my mom's had a hard life,” she continues. “She can't seem to take it well when others don't agree with every little thing she believes in. I've learned a lot about how not to be from her, which is almost as valuable as learning how to be. All I know for sure is that my marriage is going to last a lot longer than hers did."
She winks at me.
What an amazing person I'm engaged to, I think. Then, I have to remind myself. Fake engaged to.
It's just pretend. But I can't help but wish it was real, now more than ever. I'm so glad to hear that Liz was able to talk to her dad. I knew there was more to the story there than Shirley was telling her.
"But anyway," Jeff continues, annoyed. "All I know for sure is that she's not going to sue us for anything. She must really have the hots for Dr. Monroe, to go to these lengths to either actually plan to marry the guy or make up all this stuff about their planned wedding."
"It's not fake," Mia protests. "It has to be real. I need to see this wedding."
"You’ll be a guest of honor, Dr. Malone," Liz says, smiling at her again. “Don’t worry.”
"Okay, that's enough, meeting adjourned," Mark says.
"Just stay on your best behavior for the next month, if that's not too hard of a request," he tells me.
; I shrug and smirk, knowing there’s not much he can do. I give the orders around here, not him.
"After this deal goes through, I really don’t care if you marry these monkeys along with this storyteller here, and all of you can go live in the zoo together,” he adds.
"Sounds good to me," Liz says. "I hear that monkeys make very good living companions. Now that that's settled, can I get back to being trained on how to do my job around here?"
"You certainly can," Niles nods at her.
"See you on June 29th!" Mia adds.
And with that, the hot, luscious ass that just saved my own walks out of the conference room.
Chapter 32 – Elizabeth Jane
I'm trying to learn how to keep patients' files, but I can't get my mind off the great performance I just gave everyone in the conference room. I don't know what came over me. I'm normally shy but I was determined to do what was best for Derek.
I feel that I deserve an ice cream sundae for my impressive lies, but instead I need to learn how to put the medical bills in one folder and the doctor's notes in another in the medical records files. I guess it’s time to concentrate on real life and on my actual job.
"Elizabeth Jane, Honey," calls a familiar voice. "Dr. Monroe would like to see you in his office."
It's Trisha, the nurse. I smile at her, grateful for a friendly face. Everyone else around here is obviously not too happy to have me around.
"His office, office?" I ask her, since I'm used to equating the examination room with "doctor's office."
I didn't realize until I started working here just today that each doctor has their own actual office. It makes sense, but it wasn't something I had ever had the need to go to before, so it hadn't crossed my mind.
"Yes, Dear," Trisha says. "So, how are you liking it here so far?"
She squeezes my shoulder.
"So far, so good," I tell her.
I wonder if she knows exactly how good it’s going. But the look in her eyes tells me that she does. And as if reading my mind, she continues, after only a brief hesitation.
"Well, good. And I want to tell you something.”
She purses her lips as if maybe she shouldn’t tell me, but then nods her head as if she’s decided to.
“In my short time here, I've seen Dr. Monroe with a lot of… patients," she finishes, even though I know she means women. "But I've never seen him look the way he looks when he's near you. So, don't listen to any rumors or gossip you might hear around here. Just concentrate on the fact that he's different with you. I can guarantee you that."
"Thanks, Trisha."
At least I have a friend here. That makes two that I have so far, in total. Diana and Trisha. At nineteen years old, I'm off to a slow, but good, start.
I practically skip down the hall to go see Derek, wondering what's in store for me next.
Chapter 33 – Elizabeth Jane
When it comes time to enter my fake fiancé's office, I suddenly feel very shy. He's been my secret lover but now that it's out in the open, things feel different. Not better, not worse, just different.
"Liz," Derek says, as soon as he sees me. "Thank you."
He comes over to me and picks me up; then he sits me on his desk.
"That was amazing."
"It was very convincing, wasn't it?" I ask him.
"How did you come up with all of that stuff?" he asks. "You even knew about designer wedding dresses."
"When one is locked in her room all day by her mean mother, she has time to do a lot of reading on a lot of different topics."
"So, you don't really have those things planned out for our wedding?" Derek asks.
I laugh, but he looks serious.
What the hell?
I feel uncomfortable for the first time ever with him. He'd better not be messing with me.
It's one thing to tell my mom we're engaged so I won't get in trouble. And to extend that lie a bit further for the purposes of saving himself as well. But he'd better not act like what we're doing is for real, unless he really means it.
Oh, shit.
My heart speeds up.
What if he really means it?
I decide to play it cool. I don't want him to know about all the mental gymnastics happening in my head right now because of him.
"I thought you'd appreciate the date I chose," I tell him, with a grin. "Since it's thirty days after your deal's closing date, you'll be home free, right? We can just say, oops, at the last minute, Elizabeth Jane got cold feet. She's the runaway bride, folks. No harm, no foul."
Derek is staring straight into my eyes, as if he can't believe what I'm saying. I suppose he doesn't even appreciate jokes about being jilted by his fiancé, even though I'm just fake, or stood up for his wedding, even though it's just pretend. So, I decide to switch things up a bit.
"Or, hell, by that time they can't do anything to hurt you so just tell them you've returned to your old ways. You're a player again so you can't possibly tie yourself down to any woman, even the fantastic Elizabeth Jane."
"Liz," he says, pulling me in close to him. "Stop it."
I laugh.
"Come on," I tell him. "It's funny. And I saved your ass."
"You did, and I appreciate it."
He clears his throat. He actually looks nervous.
I decide to stop joking. It appears that to him, this is a very serious matter.
"I called you in here to ask you a question," he says.
"Okay, shoot."
He reaches into his lab coat's pocket and I immediately think: condom. He's going to ask me if he can thank me by fucking me. Or if it's okay to have sex with me now that he's my boss. Or how I think it'll feel to be fucked by someone even richer than he is right now— because, thanks to me, his net worth is about to go up even more, along with something else that happens to be attached to his body.
Instead, he gets down on one knee. He holds up a little blue box.
"What the…?" I start to say.
"Shhhhh."
He puts his finger over my lips.
"It's my turn to talk,” he tells me. “And, like I said, I have a question for you."
"Yes?"
"My question is whether you really want to marry me on June 29th."
"Really?"
I don't know whether to laugh or cry. This seems too good to be true. Just like when I walked into his office for him to confirm my virginity and instead he took it. Except all of this is too good to be true in a very different way.
"I figure since we have a date, and even a place, I should make it official,” he murmurs.
"But… I just now said all of that. Pulled it out of my ass."
"Your sexy ass," he corrects me, and squeezes it. "My sexy ass."
"Okay. I pulled it out of my sexy ass. So where did you get the ring? And the idea to propose marriage to me for a made-up date two months from now?"
"I already had the ring," he says. "I bought it yesterday. I knew that eventually I would want to give it to you, to propose. I just didn't know it would be so soon."
"Oh yeah?" I ask, cocking my head at him. "What made you decide to speed it up?"
He groans. I'm torturing him, purposefully not saying yes or no. I have questions of my own first.
"I had it in my desk drawer, and after I saw what you did for me in the conference room— and how spectacularly you did it— I came into my office to get this ring and give it to you. Because it made me wonder, what am I waiting for? There's no one better than you. I'm so glad to have you as my fake fiancé. And I want you as my real fiancé. Now that we have the date and the place, all I need is a real yes from you."
"But there's a problem," I say. "All of that was just as fake as our engagement. There's no way we could book the Houghton Hotel on June 29th. It's the most popular hotel in town and one of the most coveted wedding dates."
"Wow, Liz, you really are a wedding planner in your fantasies," Derek says. "You're really getting bogged down in these details.”<
br />
I smile, not wanting to let on just how much fun it was for me to make up all those elaborate details.
“I think you know I have pull in this town, and I can probably make a wedding there and on that date happen,” he continues. “It might be a bit unconventional… maybe, a brunch wedding, for example… but it could probably happen. And even if it can't, we can tell them we postponed it because someone in our family is sick, or maybe because you're pregnant."
"Pregnant?" I ask, looking at him in a mixture of astonishment, humor and awe.
He's really putting the cart before the horse. I didn't even say yes to his proposal yet and he's already talking about knocking me up.
"Well, there needs to be a little Derek Junior," he says. "Or a little mini- Liz."
I laugh.
"I love you, Liz," he says. "I know I've never even said it until I'm asking you to marry me for real, but I know you've felt it since nearly the beginning."
"I have," I tell him, gazing into his eyes. " I love you too, Derek. I always have."
"Okay then," he says. "Good. My point is that there are lots of ways to change this if it doesn’t work out, but the date and place aren't the important parts of my question. The most important thing I'm asking you is this. Elizabeth Jane Suttell, will you marry me?"
"Yes," I tell him, laying my head against his muscular chest. My muscular chest. Until death do us part. "Yes, yes, yes."
He stretches out my hand and places the large, sparkling diamond ring on my finger.
"It fits me perfectly," I tell him.
Then I can't help adding, "Just like you."
Epilogue
Elizabeth Jane
It’s my wedding day, and I can’t believe all that has happened since my mom first made me go see Dr. Monroe for a purity exam. I went from being an innocent, sheltered virgin to his dirty little slut, his fake fiancée to save his business, and now— the best part— his actual bride.
Today is also the day on which I’ve been reunited with my father. He and I float in a hot air balloon far above Derek and our wedding guests, who are gathered in the courtyard of the Houghton Hotel. The ceremony has started, and I can see Derek standing in front of the wooden wedding arch.
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