Placing my hand on her shoulder, I gave it a light squeeze. “It isn’t stupid at all. Listen, I’m headed to Joyce and Peter’s ranch, why don’t you come along?”
Dropping her head and looking up at me, Sierra asked, “You mean, Tristan’s parents’ ranch? Um . . . does he know you’re going to be there?”
“Ah . . . no?”
“Is that a fact or a question, Ryn?”
“It’s a fact. Joyce called me a few weeks back and invited me. At the time, I thought I would be using this as a trip to say good-bye to them since I wasn’t sure where things with Dodge were going.”
Sierra asked, “So, is it a good-bye visit?”
Taking in a breath, I quickly blew it out. “No, it’s not a good-bye visit. I just adore them and I don’t think I could say good-bye even if I wanted to.”
Picking up a leopard print boot, Sierra turned it over and let out a whistle. “Damn, that is one expensive ass boot.” Lifting her hand, she waved a sales associate over. “May I try this on in a size six and a half?”
Smiling, he took the boot and excused himself to go get it.
Looking at her, I giggled. “I thought you said it was expensive?”
“It is, but if my ex thinks I’m giving him half of my savings, he has another thing coming. I’ll spend it all first before I give that dick any of it.”
We both started laughing as the salesman brought out the boot. “So, has this time away from all men given you the space to clear your head?”
Dropping back in the chair, I moaned in frustration. “Ugh. Why is it that you can’t live with men and you can’t live without them?”
“Hmm . . . that is the golden question. If you find out, please let me know.”
“I do know that there could never be anything more between Dodge and I. I’ve already told him there would be no more . . .”
“Booty calls?”
Rolling my eyes, I glared at Sierra. “Whatever you want to call it. I think Dodge needs to move on and find someone who will love him like he deserves to be loved.”
Nodding her head, Sierra moved on from the subject of Dodge. “Are you going to tell Tristan you are going to visit his parents?”
“God no! I’ve been there a few times since we broke up. Both times his parents invited me and I couldn’t say no.” Smiling, I thought about the first few days I met Joyce. She had driven me insane, but I quickly fell in love with her. “Azurdee and Lark know I’ve been there.”
Standing up and walking over to a mirror, Sierra checked out the leopard print boots. “Why keep Tristan in the dark then?”
I didn’t really know why I had wanted to keep my relationship with his parents a secret from him. “I don’t know. I’m not sure how Tristan would feel about it. The first few times I went to visit them, I think he was still dating Liberty. That might have been awkward for him.”
Sitting, Sierra pulled the boots off of her feet, gave the salesman a wink and purred, “I’ll take them.” Smiling, the salesman almost did a fist pump. I would have too, especially when I saw they were three hundred and forty dollars. His eyes lit up when Sierra asked, “Do you think they would look good with a short dress?”
“Yes ma’am. I think they’d look good on you with anything you wore.”
Gag me.
“Oh . . . a man who knows how to worm his way into a girl’s heart. What else do you have for me? I’m in a spending kind of mood now,” Sierra said as she placed her finger in her mouth and gave him a seductive smile.
Before I knew it, we had a pile of shoes in front of us, and I swore if Sierra flirted with this guy one more time I was going to hurl. I had to admit, she had him eating out of her hand. It didn’t take long after he rang up her seven hundred and ninety-two dollar bill, for him to give her his cell phone number.
Walking out of Nordstrom’s, we were both loaded down with bags. Sierra tossed them all into the back of her new Audi Q7, another new purchase so her ex wouldn’t get any of her money.
Starting her car, she began to back up as I asked, “Okay, I have to know. Are you going to call him?”
Chuckling, she asked, “The sales guy?”
“Yeah, I mean he was hot as hell.”
“And like twenty. Call me picky, but I like a dick that has some wear and tear on it. Not one that is going to poke itself in and one minute later it’s retreating and takes twelve hours to recharge.”
Snapping my head over to her, I busted out laughing. “My god, do you actually hear the stuff that comes out of your mouth?”
Nodding her head, she smiled. “Tell me you don’t agree with me.”
“I didn’t say I didn’t agree, I was just wondering if you were interested is all.”
“Nope. I’m done with men. I’ll stick to my vibrators that do the job and I don’t have to worry about it sticking itself in another woman’s pussy, or playing head games with me, or wanting the money my father worked his ass off for. Yeah, vibrators all the way.”
I didn’t even have the words to say after that. Pulling out onto the highway, Sierra continued to talk. “Maybe I should get a T-shirt that says vibrators over men. I bet I’d sell a ton of those bitches.”
Giggling, I agreed. My phone buzzed in my purse and I pulled it out. “Crap, I missed a call from Azurdee. I’ve got to introduce you to Dee sometime. The two of you would hit it off really well.”
“Let’s plan something then.”
Smiling, I felt happy. For the first time in almost a year, my heart didn’t feel broken, my head wasn’t clouded with all the crap, and I had friends who I knew loved me and would be there for me.
“I’ll send Dee a text back and chat about making plans for something soon.”
Sierra gave me a thumbs-up and reached to turn up the radio. The drive back to my house was filled with loud music, laughing, and plans for a new year. It wasn’t lost on me that neither Sierra nor I mentioned men in those plans.
Pulling up to Joyce and Peter’s house, I put my car in park. My heart was racing and I wasn’t sure why. I had been here before, post Tristan, but something about this trip was causing my nerves to be on edge. I almost called Tristan this morning. I wasn’t sure what in the hell came over me, but I had his number pulled up and my finger hovered over it a good five minutes. I backed out and threw my bag in the car and headed to South Texas. Getting out of the car, I inhaled a deep breath.
“Oh man, clean country air.” I loved it here. More than I wanted to admit. The front door to the house creaked open. Joyce and MaryLou came running out.
“Kathryn! You’re here a day early!”
Giving them both a big smile, I walked up to them. MaryLou got to me first and gave me a big ole bear hug. Next was Joyce’s turn. She pulled me in tighter and whispered in my ear, “I’m so glad you came a day early.”
Pulling back some, I gave her a soft smile. “I hope you don’t mind. I just love it here and thought it would be perfect for me to catch up on some work I’ve been pushing off.”
“You know you are welcome here for as long as you want. Lark and Azurdee will be here in a few days as well. They’ve decided to come a few days early too.”
My heart dropped and I took a step back. “Tristan?”
Giving me that motherly smile of hers, she nodded her head. “He’s busy with work. They’re not letting him take off over the holidays. He’s very upset and insisted he would be here for Christmas, even if they fired him.”
Letting out a nervous laugh, I said, “Sounds like Tristan.”
“Let’s get your luggage; Peter is out checking the fences. We can get some girl talk in while he is working.”
Nodding my head and giving Joyce a wink, I turned and opened the backseat of my car. Reaching in, I grabbed the duffle bag I had packed and threw it over my shoulder. Reaching in again, I got my laptop case and my cowboy boots. “Wonder what Peter will be teaching me on this trip?” I asked as I rolled my eyes and shuddered to think what animal he would have me gut this time
around.
Joyce, MaryLou and I talked for almost two hours before Peter walked into the kitchen. “Kathryn, why look at you. You’re hair has grown longer.”
Smiling, I stood. I didn’t want to tell Peter I had just gotten my hair cut. It was just to my shoulders and the sides were pulled up. Pushing me back, he looked me over after he gave me a bear hug. Nodding his head, he gave me a smile like none I’d ever seen before.
“Why do I get the feeling you are planning something in your head for me?”
“Smart girl, I always knew I liked you, Kathryn. It’s a shame my son is too stupid to open his eyes.”
“Peter Williams!” Joyce called out. Laughing, I lifted my hand and pointed my finger at him.
“Behave.”
Giving me a sly smile, Peter said, “Always.”
Four days after I first pulled up for my mini Joyce and Peter vacation, I found myself lost on the ranch. Peter thought it would be fun for me to take the Jeep out and go for a drive.
Get some fresh country air, Kathryn. Cause the country air on the front porch wasn’t good enough he said. Even though I had my laptop all set up and I was comfy as hell. Oh no, I had to get my ass up and take a jaunt around the few thousand-acre ranch.
Stopping the Jeep, I looked around. “I’m so screwed right now.”
Opening the door, I got out and began looking around. For some reason, this area of the ranch looked familiar to me. Laughing, I dropped my head back. “Oh dear God, Ryn. It’s thousands of acres . . . how could this spot seem familiar?”
Turning to my right I saw a trail. Walking toward it, I pulled out my cell. Still no coverage. It was hit or miss if I had cell coverage here. I couldn’t wait for Lark and Dee to show up later this evening. I loved Joyce, but something was off with her, as if she was hiding something. She kept asking me if I wanted to go into town and get facials. I finally agreed to it yesterday, thinking maybe it was Joyce who needed time away from the ranch and Peter. Smiling, I had to admit it was fun. I would have loved to have had a mother like Joyce. She was funny, said what was on her mind, yet she had a way of being gentle with you, even when she was telling you that you were flat out wrong about something.
She never brought up Tristan. Not once. On my last trip here she mentioned him a number of times. The fact that she hadn’t brought him up caused me to think that maybe he had been dating someone. I asked Sierra and she said he wasn’t. They saw each other once a week and I was insanely jealous of their friendship. I had to stop myself more than once from telling Sierra I didn’t want her hanging out with Tristan. I knew it was selfish of me. I did however finally break down and ask her if she had maybe mentioned to Tristan I wasn’t seeing Dodge anymore. All she did was smile and say, “Oh, he already knew that.”
She never did elaborate on how Tristan knew this bit of information.
Making my way down the trail, I came across a hunter’s cabin that Peter used for the guys who paid to hunt on his ranch. It only took a split-second for me to realize this was the same cabin Tristan and I made love in. The same cabin where he told me he was falling in love with me.
Making my way to the door, I reached down to the doorknob. I knew it would be locked. Tristan had used a master key he carried on his key ring to open the door last year.
A rush of sadness swept over my body. It was almost a year to the date when we had been here together. Closing my eyes, I tried the handle. When it turned, I let out a gasp. Pushing the door open, I stood at the threshold. I was scared to death to step into the room. Knowing the moment I did, the memory would overtake me and push away any progress I had made this week in moving on and letting Tristan go. Up until now, the visit to the ranch had been therapeutic. It was a cleansing almost. I knew in my heart I would forever love Tristan.
Taking in a deep breath, I walked into the room. My eyes landed on the bed and the memory swept into my head.
Walking over to the bed, I stared down at it. Wrapping my arms around my body, I finally let go. I dropped to the floor and began crying.
“Why? Why did you have to tell me you were falling in love with me?”
I wasn’t sure how long I was on the floor. I just sat there, leaning against the bed where Tristan had changed my entire world. Dropping my head back, I realized it was late.
How long had I been in the cabin? What if I had to stay out here all night? I couldn’t stay here all night. Pulling out my phone, I still had no service. Panic began to set in. Jumping up, I quickly made my way to the door and pulled it open. I was beginning to have a panic attack, knowing I was lost and night was quickly coming. I ran smack into someone and I let out a scream. Okay, that’s not true. It wasn’t just a scream; it was a loud blood-curdling scream. Turning, I tried to run back into the cabin.
The person grabbed me around my waist and pulled me back to them. I began trying to hit them with my fists, but my back was pulled to them. I started trying to kick, but they lifted me off the ground.
“Let go of me! I swear to God I’ll kill you. Let me go!” I screamed.
“Ryn! Jesus Christ, stop fighting me!”
Oh dear God, they know my name. I started screaming out, “Help! Somebody help me!”
They started walking me toward the bed. No! Oh God no! Attempting to fight harder, it felt like my lungs were closing in on me. I was working hard at dragging in air.
Can’t breathe . . .
They threw me onto the bed and I scrambled up it and turned around, still screaming the best I could since it felt like I was getting no air.
My eyes adjusted to the darkness of the cabin. The sun hadn’t gone down yet but it was beginning to get darker.
Oh. My. God.
Tristan was standing there, breathing heavy as he stared at me. “What in the fuck are you doing here?” he shouted.
I stopped screaming and looked around. Lark was standing behind Tristan. My chest was heaving up and down, not only from my attempt at trying to get away, but from the panic attack.
I couldn’t talk. Opening my mouth, I just dragged in more air.
Tristan grabbed his chin. “Motherfucker. You punched the shit out of my jaw.”
Oh. Yeah me! I hadn’t realized I had landed one. Serves his ass right.
Lark moved over to me. “Ryn, slow down your breathing.”
Trying to do just that, I looked at Tristan. Oh no. Tristan was here. Oh shit. Shit. Shit. Shit.
Lark placed his hands on the sides of my face. “Ryn . . . look at me. Breathe in through your nose, out through your mouth.”
“What in the fuck are you doing out here? Are you trying to get lost, Ryn? Do you have any fucking idea how huge this ranch is?” Moving my eyes off of Lark, I looked at Tristan. He was furious. I knew it wasn’t from me getting lost. It was from me being here. Tears began to form in my eyes and I hated that I was appearing so weak in front of him.
Lark turned to Tristan. “Tristan, I don’t really think yelling at her right now is a good idea. Can’t you see she’s scared to death?”
Right at that moment, a damn tear rolled down my cheek. Tristan just stood there, staring at me. His eyes softened a bit, but he made no attempt to come to me. I prayed like hell he would. I wanted him to hold me in his arms, not Lark. Tristan didn’t move. His body was tense and his hands were balled up into fists.
I wanted to call out his name. Beg him to hold me. My heart was beating like crazy in my chest, and it wasn’t from me being afraid anymore. It was from the knowledge that Tristan clearly didn’t want me here.
Tristan turned and walked outside, closing the cabin door behind him. That’s when I lost all control and the tears fell freely. Lark pulled me into his arms and whispered against my hair, “Shh . . . it’s okay, Ryn. Please don’t cry. It’s all going to be okay now.”
It wasn’t going to be okay. Tristan didn’t love me. If he had, he would have never walked away from me. Again.
Grabbing a hold of Lark’s shirt, I cried like I had never cried before.
My father looked scared, and my father was never scared. Then he told Lark and me he had talked Ryn into taking a drive in the Jeep. At first, I was confused as hell as to why Ryn was at my family’s ranch, but when he said she had been gone for over five hours, I freaked out. Lark told my dad to go back into the house and we would look for Ryn.
Luckily, it had rained earlier and her tracks were easy to follow. When we pulled up to the trail to the cabin, I froze. There was no way in hell she would remember how to get here.
Why was she here? At the ranch? At the cabin? My head was spinning and I wasn’t sure if I should be feeling happy we found her or pissed that she was even here.
The cabin door opened and Ryn and Lark walked out. Ryn looked down at the ground and wouldn’t even look at me. “I’m gonna take her back in the Jeep, she’s really upset.”
I should be the one holding her, not my brother. When I walked up to her, she wouldn’t look at me. “I’ll take her back in my truck, you follow us in the Jeep.”
Snapping her head up, her eyes looked panicked. “No!” Shaking her head, she began freaking out again. “No, I just want Lark to take me back.”
My heart broke in two and for once in my life, I felt as if I was going to cry. “Ryn, I’m . . . I’m sorry I yelled like that. Let me take you back and . . .”
She began shaking her head as she whispered, “No. Please, I don’t want to go back with you.”
My knees felt like they were going to give out on me. My eyes burned with the threat of tears and my world felt destroyed. “Ryn . . .” I whispered as she looked into my eyes. I’d never seen her eyes look so sad and lost.
Lark cleared his throat. “Tristan, just let me take her back. We’ll meet you at the ranch house.”
Lark began walking Ryn over to the Jeep. Before she got into the Jeep, she looked over her shoulder at me. Not able to move, I watched as Lark turned the Jeep around and headed back to the house.
Undeniable Love Page 13
