by Dora Dresden
Abby woke in a slow start and for a moment the whiteness of the hospital blinded her. When she could see, she was more than a little surprised about who was beside her.
“Aaron?” She said and her voice came out rougher than she expected.
“Glad to see that you’re awake,” her boss said good-naturedly.
“What are you doing here?” Abby asked, amazed.
Aaron laughed. “Is that anyway to greet a visitor at your sick bed?”
“Sick bed?” Abby repeated dully, her voice still raw. It felt like her brain wasn't keeping up with the situation.
She looked around the room, taking it all in. It was a normal narrow hospital room that she might have shared with someone else but the other bed beside hers was empty. On the small end table near the foot of the bed was a beautiful array of flowers, get-well cards and smiling teddy bears that she knew at once had come from the cooks and other wait staff at the restaurant.
Abby moved to touch her flushed face but her right arm was stuck through with an IV that snaked up and behind her bed, connected to something out of view. She used her left hand instead and felt the heat radiating from her face, though her body was run through with a bone-deep chill.
“A fever?” She said more to herself than to Aaron. “In summer? Only me.”
“More than that. People don't just fall over from a fever,” Aaron admonished. “Fever brought on by exhaustion is what the doctors said. They asked me if you were working too hard. But I'm your boss, I couldn't say yes.”
Abby wanted to laugh but she knew the motion would jar the headache that was progressively making itself known. Even her eyeballs hurt.
“Are you overworked?” Aaron asked, looking more concerned than Abby had ever seen him.
“Wow,” Abby smiled, “I must look really in a bad way if you're worried about me.”
“Shouldn't I be worried?” Aaron asked. “You nearly fell down the stairs. If William wasn't there to catch you before you tumbled down eight flights of stairs, you'd be dealing with a lot more than a high temperature. Not to mention I'd be down another waitress and then what would I do?”
Abby didn't know what to say to that. William saved me. Again. He's always there when I need him. Thinking about it was making her head hurt worse than it already did. She decided to change the subject.
“Not that I don't appreciate you filling me in,” Abby said. “But you really are the last person I'd expect to see here. You're going above and beyond the call of duty of a boss.”
“Well William called Noelle when he took you to the hospital. He said he didn't know anyone else that was close to you.” Aaron explained.
Abby frowned at that and Aaron paused noticing her sour expression but she nodded for him to continue.
“Noelle left yesterday morning for her gig. Believe me, Noelle would turn around an entire cruise ship to come back for you if she could. But since she couldn't, she called me and sent me out to check up on you. If I didn't, she'd never let me hear the end of it.”
Aaron shrugged. He was blushing a little, an expression she had never seen him wear. Abby had to wonder if he was embarrassed at being caught breaking his bad boy image and actually doing something nice or if it was something more. He does seem to smile whenever he mentions Noelle's name.
Abby refused to connect the dots all the way on that one. The last few hours had held too many revelations for her to accept a growing romance between her boss and her coworker. If it's true, Abby thought, at least someone's happy. And they already argue like a married couple.
“Thank you. I'm glad you're here,” Abby said. Though she had just woken up she was already feeling tired again. 'Exhaustion' Aaron had said. That was definitely the word for it.
“I'm glad I'm here too. You shouldn't be alone,” Aaron said. “And you don't have to be.”
“I didn't want to worry my parents,” Abby replied. She knew that hearing their daughter was in the hospital would upset them, bringing up all sorts of memories of Angelica’s passing.
“I didn't mean them,” Aaron said, shaking his head. “I meant William. He's been pacing in the waiting room all night, worrying about you. He should be here instead of me but he refused to come up.”
“Refused?” Why did that make her heart hurt?
Aaron nodded. “He seems to think that you're angry at him. He said you wouldn't want him up here.”
“He's right,” Abby sighed. “I don't want him up here. I can't see him right now.”
She knew she had a lot to think about and with her head clouded as it was, now was not the time to deal with the things she now knew.
Aaron looked down at her sympathetically. “Whatever is going on between you guys, work it out,” he said.
Abby was more than a little surprised by that. Aaron had always been very open about his romantic interest in her and even more open about his dislike for William. Abby figured Aaron would take any opportunity to get between them, but that didn't seem to be the case.
“You do work too hard,” Aaron continued. “You put too much pressure on yourself. But when you're with William you're happy. You finally let your guard down.”
Abby shook her head, feeling weary. There was so much to think about, so many memories to sort through and most of them were sad.
“It's not that simple,” she told Aaron.
“It should be,” he said.
Abby felt like she was going to begin crying all over again but it seemed like she was all out of tears. A silence stretched between them then and when Aaron finally realized that she was not going to say any more on the subject he heaved a sigh.
Aaron walked over to the small chair in the corner where a duffel bag rested on the seat. “The doctor wants you to stay until the morning to make sure that fever breaks. I grabbed a few things from your apartment you might need. William let me in.”
Abby nodded. She remembered that she had given him an extra key a few weeks earlier since she was so prone to running out of her apartment in a hurry and forgetting hers.
Aaron picked up the duffel bag and set it on the edge of the bed for her. He yawned cavernously.
“Go on home, Aaron.” Abby told him. “I'm fine really.”
Aaron smiled. “I do have to cover two waitresses' shifts tomorrow now.”
“Sorry about that,” Abby said.
“Don't be sorry, just get better and back to busing tables.” Aaron headed towards the door.
“Aaron,” she called to him. “Please tell William to go home too. Tell him that we'll talk.”
It was the most she could promise. The thought of William just outside of her room waiting for her was enough to break her heart but it wasn't time to see him yet. If nothing else, he had betrayed her trust and that was going to be hard to forgive.
“And Aaron,” Abby called again as he opened the door.
He paused, turning to her. “Yeah, Abby?”
“Good luck with Noelle,” she said with a wink.
Aaron reddened but then he laughed harder than she had ever seen him.
“Thanks,” he finally said. Then laughing again he stepped out and shut the door.
Alone now, Abby turned to the bag Aaron had brought for her. She was surprised it had occurred to him to bring it and she surmised it must have been Noelle's idea. Inside were a few articles of clothing and she riffled through them. Aaron had obviously grabbed the first pile of clothing he'd come across. She searched through it trying to find a sweater to combat the ever-present chill she felt.
Abby found the sweater at the very bottom. Moving her arm gingerly she tugged it out but something came with it. She saw a flash of steel blue and knew at once what she was looking at.
It was William's tie, the one she had cried all over when she had finally opened up to him about Angelica and all the things that had held her back her entire life.
“I told him everything, but he already knew,” she said softly to herself, the realization slowly dawning on her.
The ice blue tie was the exact color of William's eyes except in the places where it had been stained by Abby's tears. Now she added a few more.
Chapter Twelve
Abby was avoiding William. She had been released from the hospital that morning with strict orders from the doctors to stay in bed and catch up on some much needed rest so she would not suffer a relapse.
She took a taxi home and tried not to let the stress get to her as they took tight turns and cut between the other cars. She took the empty elevator up to her apartment. Apparently Len finally had reason to make sure it was in proper working order. Abby was glad. The thought of climbing all those stairs was daunting when she still felt tired all over. Besides, she wasn't sure she could handle looking down the long narrow steps and realizing what might have happened to her if William hadn't caught her before she fell.
Abby was guiltily relieved when she saw that the eighth floor hallway was empty. Half of her had expected to find a yellow sticky note stuck onto her door but there was nothing there when she looked. She felt a deep pang of regret at that and at the silence that came from behind the shut door of William's apartment. No Surprise Symphony today.
Inside, Abby curled up on her floral couch, suddenly feeling that the bedroom was just too far of a trip for her to make. She sat there for hours, thinking about all the things she had been trying so hard not to think about. At some point she must have dozed off because a knocking sound woke her up from a dreamless sleep.
The knocking was coming from the far wall, she realized. It came again, three soft taps against the wall her apartment shared with William's.
Abby got up from the couch slowly. She felt as though her limbs were moving like they were underwater, too heavy and too slow. She reached the wall, pressing her warm head against the cool surface. She liked the thought that William was so close. He was always close, always there when she needed him. Abby knocked back, three soft taps in quick succession.
The reply came quickly. Two soft knocks responded to her from the other side of the wall. Abby mimicked the knock, louder now. Then silence. Abby stayed pressed up against the wall. She missed him, she realized. She missed him very much.
The next knock came from the door. Abby crossed the room as quickly as she could. She didn't want to give herself a chance to second guess the decision.
William stood at the door looking hopeful. In one hand he held a thermos, in the other a stack of papers.
“She told you about our knock,” Abby blurted out.
“Yes,” William said.
It was something they had done as children. If she and Angie were ever in adjoining rooms anywhere in the house they'd knock on the wall to each other. At night they'd knock on the wood of their headboards from opposite sides of the room. It was their unspoken way of communicating with each other, their way of saying they were together even if they were apart.
Abby didn't say anything. She only stepped out of the way of the door so William could enter. He hesitated a moment before following her in, kicking the door shut with his foot. Abby sat back down in the exact same spot on the couch that she had vacated. She drew her knees up tightly to her chest and regarded William. He stood awkwardly in the middle of the room but his expression was determined.
“How are you feeling?”
“I'm okay, tired I guess,” she said softly.
“Of course,” William said even softer. He paused for a long while, just looking down at her, his eyes searching. It reminded Abby of the way he had looked at her the first time they met. Well the first time they had met again. She suddenly remembered the note he left her at the Home Sweet.
'I am happy our paths keep crossing like this. Maybe we can meet again soon?' Abby remembered. In his own way he was telling me. I just never put it together.
“Thank you for saving me,” Abby said finally cutting into the silence. “I know I sound like a broken record.”
“You're welcome,” William smiled that smile she loved to see, but all at once it faded from his face to be marred by a deep frown.
“What's the matter?” Abby asked him, knowing there were so many things he must have been thinking of.
“When I turned the corner to the stairs I saw you standing there. You started to fall, just started crumpling like a little doll. I was so sure you were going to go down all those stairs. My heart stopped. Everything stopped. I just reached out and prayed.”
William's voice broke as he spoke and Abby wondered if he was imagining the other twin, the one he hadn't been there to save.
He cleared his throat and held up the thermos in his hand.
“Soup,” he explained. “My grandmother's special recipe. It heals all.”
Abby hadn't realized she was hungry until just then. How long had she sat on the couch thinking and not moving? Most of the day was gone, outside the sky was turning dark.
William set down the stack of papers he held on the coffee table. Without a word he walked the short distance into her kitchen. Abby eyed the worn stack but didn't ask about them. William returned a moment later with a bowl and a spoon.
“Careful, it’s hot,” he said, handing them to her.
She tasted the soup gingerly, not at all convinced of William's ability to cook. It resembled chicken noodle soup but the smell suggested some spicier ingredients. It was very good and the taste sparked a memory.
“I've had this before,” Abby realized.
William nodded. “My grandmother would make it whenever she heard any kid in the neighborhood was sick. She'd just show up on their door step with a big old thermos. You don't find neighbors like that in New York.”
Abby smiled at him. “Except in this case.”
“Yes,” he agreed. “Except in our very unusual case.”
While she ate, they stay in companionable silence but the air was heavy with all they needed to discuss. Finally William sat forward on the couch and scooped up the papers. They were letters, Abby realized upon closer inspection. She recognized at once the large messy handwriting even though she hadn't seen it in so long. Abby and Angie had strikingly similar styles of writing but Angie's strokes were always bigger, more embellished.
“You kept her letters,” Abby said.
“I did. All of them. I kept your notes too.”
Abby wasn't sure how that information was supposed to make her feel. William shuffled through the pages until he found what he was looking for. He handed her the weathered page but Abby was reluctant to reach out and take it.
“Do you really think I want to read my sister’s old love letters to you?” She said surprising even herself with how venomous the question sounded as it left her lips.
But William would not be deterred. He held the letter out until she finally took it.
The letter began with the usual gushing comments of a teenage girl. The first several paragraphs were taken up by declarations of affection and complaints about how they were unfairly being kept apart. Abby noted the date was about twelve years back.
“What's the point of this?” Abby asked, feeling tears choking her throat. She had stopped reading after a particularly intimate line where Angie had declared her never-ending love for William. The entire margin was filled up with little scribbled hearts in pink ink and Angie had even written her first name with William's last name over and over in one corner.
“Please keep reading Abby,” William instructed solemnly.
Abby didn't want to but she did. She flipped over the page seeing that the other side of the lined pape
r had been used up too. Angelica really did tell William everything, Abby realized, even down to what she had eaten for dinner that day.
Abby was not overly surprised when she came to a paragraph with her own name in it. But she was surprised by what it said. The whole rest of the letter was about Abby it seemed.
“I wish I had my sister's confidence,” Abby read aloud. “She never doubts or questions the things she should do. Abby is strong and dutiful when I am weak. She is determined and her determination is going to take her farther than I'll ever get.”
