by Raven Dark
“Then why did he kick you out?”
She shook her head and closed her hand over mine.
Please don’t take him away from me. I couldn’t stand it.
As soon as I finished giving David his marching orders, no surprise, he widened his eyes like I’d grown another head. Believe me when I tell you those were the hardest words I’d ever had to say. My fists clenched with desperation to somehow undo what I’d set in motion.
“Mr. Davros, are you sure?”
Everything in me wanted to take the words back, but I made myself nod. That small gesture made the gongs playing in my head go apeshit until I almost groaned.
“I’m sure. Do it, now.”
But David shook his head. “No. Kane, there has to be another way.”
I didn’t miss that he’d called me Kane. He rarely did that. He also rarely disobeyed my orders.
“Excuse me?”
“You know you can’t do that to her. There must be a way to make this work.”
“There isn’t. Things have become too dangerous. It’s the only way to protect her.”
“Kane, what did your dad tell you? What did he say?”
“We’ll talk about that later. Just do as I tell you.” When he put his head back, I took his shoulder bracingly. “David. Please.”
He let out a long, long sigh. “You love her, don’t you?”
I blinked at him. How…?
“You wouldn’t be doing something this idiotic unless you loved her.”
I smiled tiredly at him, not having the will to reprimand him. Besides, he was right, I did love her. I loved her so hard it was killing me.
“She’ll never forgive you. You know this.”
I blinked at the ceiling, my throat so tight it hurt. “I know.”
He nodded and stood up. Then he went to carry out the only orders I’d ever seen him truly struggle with. When he was gone, I closed my eyes.
I love you, Anika. One day, you’ll forgive me.
Less than ten minutes after David had gone into Kane’s room, he slipped back out into the hall and slowly shut the double doors behind him. For the first time since I’d met him, David wouldn’t look at me. I stood up along with Gala, who looked as worried as I felt.
“What’s happened? Is he ok?” I demanded.
“He’s. Miss Anika, I’m sorry to have to tell you this.”
“Oh, God. He’s not—?”
He shook his head. “No, he’s not dead. But he told me to tell you.”
“Well, for Christ’s sake, spit it out, David.” Gala.
“Charlie, please take Gala home.”
Gala’s driver came over with a nod.
“David, what are you doing?” An odd panic trickled into my veins. I wasn’t even sure why.
“David, hold on, what’s going on?” Gala’s voice had never sounded so harsh.
Again, he wouldn’t look at me. “It’s nothing you need to worry about, Miss Rossi. Kane will speak to you later. Charlie. Thank you.”
Gala huffed but left with her driver. When they were gone, David turned to me. I put my hands on my hips.
“Are you going to tell me what the hell you’re doing?”
“I’m sorry about this, Miss Anika. I truly am. But Mr. Davros has decided to terminate your contract.”
“My–” I cut off, my head buzzing. “What the hell are you talking about?” Why did it feel like my heart was trying to beat its way free? “David, what are you saying?”
His face turned completely deadpan. Completely, except for the shame that flickered in his eyes.
“I’m saying it’s over, Miss Anika. Mr. Davros doesn’t want to see you again.”
“What?” The words sounded so out of the blue, so ridiculous, I had to assume there was some other reason Kane would order me away, something other than his not wanting me there. I made a vexed noise. “David, let me see him.”
“I can’t do that.” He barely moved, but suddenly his stance gave every bit the impression of a guard barring the door.
“Yes, you can. Come on, don’t be stupid, let me in there. What’s wrong with him?”
He sighed. “I had a feeling it would go like this. Forgive me, Miss Anika.”
“What—”
David grabbed me, spun me around, and then his arm was around my neck. He pressed on it in an unfamiliar way, pushing my chin down.
I had about a half a second to flail before a fog slid in, and then nothingness claimed me.
* * * * *
I woke an unidentifiable time later, blinking my eyes open as light stabbed at them. Sunlight, I realized slowly, sitting up in what turned out to be my bed.
Confusion swam through me, through the haze that seemed to lay over my mind like a shroud. I glanced around.
“What the hell?”
The four walls of my Spartan bedroom stared back at me, all my familiar second-hand furniture my father had helped me move in when I’d first graduated from nursing school. I glanced out my small bedroom, window. The New York skyline gleamed under what looked like late afternoon sunlight.
Then, slowly, the memory of what had happened at Kane’s mansion careened through my thoughts. David, putting me in a chokehold until I passed out. Him telling me that Kane, the man I loved, didn’t want to see me anymore.
It rolled through me, what must have happened after David knocked me out. Nurses training told me the fogginess in my head was Chloroform or some other similar drug. My shoulder ached, and when I lifted up my shirt, I wasn’t surprised to find a tiny needle mark there. David must have had me kept unconscious while he flew me back to New York. I didn’t have to think hard to realize why. He knew I wouldn’t leave willingly, wouldn’t leave until I heard the words from Kane himself, so he’d arranged it so I couldn’t stop him from taking me away. Away from the man I wanted to spend the rest of my life with.
Anger overrode my confusion, and I jumped out of bed, looking for my phone. My carryon and four other bags I’d never seen before were standing by the wall. I fished through them, scrunching my brows at the contents. Only one had my clothing I’d originally brought with me to Kane’s hotel that first day I’d signed his contract. The others were filled with the clothing he’d had me wear on any given day, plus those he’d left for me in the wardrobe at his mansion.
The sight of the clothes only infuriated me. I clenched my fists and stood, throwing my foot into one of the bags. “Damn him.”
I was about to resume hunting for my phone, ready to call Kane until he finally picked up. That’s when I noticed the letter sitting on my dresser beside the bags. It was folded neatly over once, with my name written on it in gorgeous writing that smacked of a professional job. My heart plummeted to my stomach. I didn’t have to look at that letter to know what it was.
“If this is a Dear John letter, I’ll kill him.” I snatched up the piece of paper and flipped it open, but the more I read, the more my chest tightened.
Angel,
The contract we had has been destroyed. Your father’s debts are still repaid; I won’t go back on my promise. I won’t punish him for the mistake I made in pulling you into this mess. His medical care will continue until he either no longer needs it, or you terminate it. I’ve arranged for Oliver to take you up to Lakewood whenever you wish to see him.
Gavini can’t touch you, but I’ve hired a protection detail to be with you whenever you need him until the Ferrara woman is identified and dealt with. I will find her and take care of it; you will have nothing more to do with the matter.
I meant what I said about helping you. If ever you require fertility assistance, there’s a number at the bottom of the letter for a doctor who will help you, no questions asked, and I will cover the cost.
No doubt you will hate me for what I’ve done. One day, you will forgive me.
Kane
I sat on the side of my bed, stunned, reading the letter over and over in silence. The weight of his words sank in on me, crushing and too heavy to
bear.
If ever I felt the distance and coldness from him, I felt it now. For one thing, the whole letter was written in the same gorgeous professional font, on thick, pearl-white paper that reminded me of one of those expensive wedding invitations. For another, under his name, he’d signed it with a signature, the way someone would do on a professional document or a legal paper. Somehow, his offer of help only made things worse. That, along with the clothes he’d given me, felt like empty parting gifts, an insult added to injury.
After everything we’d been through, he couldn’t even break up with me like a normal guy. He’d told me once, a man never apologizes, never explains, so I wasn't surprised there was neither in the letter, but still. He’d broken up with me the way he’d started this whole thing, leaving me no choice, making all the decisions, and reducing what we had to letters on a fucking page.
The thought of losing him made my chest feel like it was being crushed under cement blocks, yet anger rose up, white hot and bright. It tightened my fists until the beautiful letter crumpled in my grip.
It didn’t help that his timing sucked on an epic scale. Would he still have ended things if he’d known who my birth father was? No, it didn’t matter. If I’d had a chance to tell him, he might have only stayed with me out of obligation, which would have been as painful as losing him was now. Besides, as long as Gavini didn’t know, and as long as he continued to fear exposure to the other Dons, he wouldn’t do anything to me. Even so, losing Kane on top of everything else just felt like another trademark of the Davros name, another testament to the destructive power that followed wherever he went.
My eyes stung, but I blinked the tears back, ripping up the letter. Crying was too much like giving up, and I wasn’t ready to do that yet. He couldn’t end things like this. I wouldn’t let him.
15
The next two days crawled by in a blur. I did everything I could think of to set things straight with Kane. I don’t know, perhaps some foolish part of me believed that if I could just talk to him, face to face, I could make him change his mind.
It was a silly thing. That first night back in New York, I emptied my bags, resisting the childish urge to burn the clothing Kane had given me. How could I wear them, knowing they would only remind me of him? Still, in the end, I couldn’t make myself let go of them and ended up hanging them in my closet.
When the bags were empty, I still hadn’t found Pinky. Every other item I owned or accumulated while with Kane was there, but my stuffed pink pig was nowhere to be found. Kane had to have forgotten to pack him.
Every time we went anywhere, Kane remembered to pack the stuffed pig, but now he forgot. I sighed, getting into bed without him for the first time since I’d won him at a fair as a teen. Perhaps it was for the best. I’d made Pinky my safeword. I didn’t want to go to sleep thinking of Kane every time I looked at him.
Of course, more than once, it occurred to me that severing our relationship wasn’t his choice. Something, or someone, was forcing him to end things, a threat bigger than Gavini or the Ferrara woman who wanted us dead. Kane had always said he’d do what he had to do to protect me, and apparently, that included never seeing me again. If I could see him, just once, I could make him tell me who was blackmailing him, and we’d take care of it.
Outside my apartment door, I heard someone cough. My bodyguard, probably. I squeezed my eyes shut. For the most part, the guard kept his distance, so much that I hardly knew he was there. He’d approached me once, only to introduce himself as Steve. Having the guard there, knowing that Kane had hired him to protect me, was just another unwanted reminder of what I’d lost. What I wasn’t ready to lose.
That’s why, two days after ripping up the letter, the first thing I did was go to the Lion’s Head Hotel.
I’d found out he’d left Bel Air, but I couldn’t find him anywhere else, either. Not at the houses he owned in various states, not at the hotels. If he’d come back to New York, I’d likely find him where we’d spent our first night together. As soon as I’d finished my shift at the hospital, I’d had a cab drop me off.
Stomach churning, I went up to the front counter.
“Is Mr. Davros staying here at the moment?”
The receptionist checked her files and called up. She gave me a beaming smile, not at all like the snide looks I’d gotten the first time I came here with Kane. Of course, it helped that I wasn’t dressed the way I had been then, in worn jeans and a T, instead, wearing one of the expensive three piece suits Kane had liked.
“He’s in room two-ten. He’ll see you.”
I widened my eyes, the butterflies in my stomach going berserk. Was it that easy? Somehow I expected to be kept from seeing him. Gulping, I went up to his room. At the door, I knocked, unable to stop my hands from shaking.
What would he do? Send me away? Would David meet me at the door and stop me from even seeing him at all?
Feet shuffled inside and then the door opened, but the man standing there wasn’t David or Kane. Oliver, Kane’s silver-haired older brother, smiled at me.
“Anika. Come in.”
“O…Ollie?” Disappointment formed a tight ball in my gut. I stepped into the suit, blinking at him in confusion. “What are you doing here?”
Sympathy flashed across his face. Suddenly not looking at me, he shut the door and led me into the large, plushly decorated suit I’d spent so much time in with Kane. “I sometimes stay here when I’m in town on business. I…er…do you want something to drink?”
I almost smiled at his awkwardness. Oliver was so much more laid back than his brother, so much more easy to talk to. With the way he looked everywhere but at me, he knew what had happened between myself and Kane. “No thank you. Listen, Ollie.”
He stopped, and his shoulders fell. I dropped my arms. My head buzzed with the need to know what had compelled Kane to cut me out of his life, but for some reason, the words stuck in my throat. I settled for an easier question.
“Is Kane okay?”
He lowered himself slowly onto the couch opposite me. The vivid scar on his hand stood out, puckered and pink on tanned skin. I’d seen him a week after his father had stabbed him, and it had been healing beautifully then. Seeing the scar now only reminded me of the carnage his father was capable of. Was that it? Had his father somehow forced him into this?
“He’s mending. He finally let me take him for an X-Ray. No permanent damage. He gets headaches, even if he tries to hide them. Otherwise, he’s fine.”
I nodded, bowing my head, wishing it didn’t ease some of the tension in my chest to know he was all right.
“He misses you, you know.” His voice was soft.
I jerked my head up, the words piercing the torrent of emotions roiling in me. A spark of hope hit me, and I tamped it down.
“He won’t say it, but I know he does.”
“Seriously? I can’t hear this right now.” I pushed to my feet. Paced the room.
“I know you find that hard to believe. Look, Anika.” He paused, choosing his words with care. “I don’t know what happened between you, but I can guess. My brother’s an ass, but he wouldn’t have made you leave if he didn’t think you were safer away from him.”
“That’s not how it feels.” He doesn’t want to see you again.
“I can imagine. When it comes to sensitively, Kane missed the train. He was doing what he thought was best for both of you.”
“But that’s just it. He decided what’s best for me without even talking to me.”
“Yup. Sounds like my brother.”
“What happened, Ollie? After everything we went through, he can’t have just decided it was over.”
“The truth is, he won’t tell me anything either. I mean I know it was Dad who…” He looked away. My heart ached for him, having to deal with a father like Victor.
“Did your father say something to him? Did he do something to make Kane behave like this?”
“I wish I knew. I wouldn’t put it past him. But when
Kane doesn’t want to talk, there’s no cracking him.”
“I know.” I looked at my lap. “I tried to find him. It’s like he’s disappeared. He hasn’t been to his house in Bel Air since I was there. He…he doesn’t want me to find him.”
Oliver gave me an empathetic look. Or perhaps it was pity. My stomach twisted. Somehow, that look hurt more than anything.
“This is how things go with him. When it comes to women.” He looked at me, and his ears turned red. “I was hoping with you it would be different. That you’d change him.”
“I guess I wasn’t enough.”
“I could talk to him for you.”
Horror gripped me and I shook my head quickly. “Don’t you dare. I won’t beg, and I won’t send someone else to beg for me.”
“All right, I won’t say a word.”
Well, this was it. Coming here, and now talking to Oliver, had been my last hope. Despair took deep roots in me, sharp and merciless. I stood up, dropping my arms. “I’m sorry I came to you with this.”
“Not at all.” He got to his feet and came to me, setting his hand on my shoulder. “You probably won’t believe this, but Kane loves you. You’re the best thing that ever happened to him. One of these days, he’ll realize what he lost, and he’ll be kicking himself.”
“If only that were true.” I took his hand, looking at the scar and squeezing. “I’m glad your hand is better.”
“Thanks. When you want to see your father, let me know, and I’ll get you there. Okay?” He pulled me into a sudden hug.
An absurd sense of loss welled up in me, potent and all the stronger with the realization that hit home then. I’d never tell Ollie this, but having him as a friend, seeing him like this, only made losing Kane more painful. It cut me deep that I couldn’t even enjoy the warmth for his brother that filled me.
I left the Lion’s Head minutes later, eyes stinging. Still unwilling to let the tears fall, I told the cabbie to take me to Fran’s. There was only one thing left to do, the only thing a girl with a broken heart can do when all hope of reconciling is lost.
