Chapter 37
The dress Jamie bought for Stacey is even shorter than she remembers. The hem of the skirt is above her knees. It’s tight around her stomach too, so that it feels like someone’s tightened a rubber band around her middle. I didn’t get that fat in a few weeks, did I? she wonders. It’s too late for Grandma to let it out at all; she’ll just have to make do.
She takes a few minutes to comb her hair until it’s perfectly smooth. She fusses with her bangs to make sure they’re straight. When Grandma comes in to check on her, Stacey touches her hair. “Can we do something special with it? I want to look really pretty tonight.”
Grandma takes a handful of hair and studies it for a moment. Then she opens a drawer on the vanity. She takes out a silver clip shaped like a butterfly, its wings studded with turquoise. “This used to belong to my daughter,” she says. “I think it would look very pretty on you.”
“OK,” Stacey says. She sits down on the stool and tries not to move while Grandma braids a couple tresses in the back. Then she puts the silver clip near the top of Stacey’s head to hold down the braid. “That’s really pretty. Thank you, Grandma.”
“You’re welcome, dear. Would you like any makeup?”
“You said I’m not old enough for makeup.”
“Tonight’s a special occasion.” Grandma smiles and holds up one finger. “It’s just for tonight, understand?”
“Yes.” Grandma is much better at makeup than Jamie. She puts just a touch of rouge and eyeshadow on Stacey’s face. Stacey smiles; she feels older now, like a grown-up. She can’t wait until Darren sees her like this.
“Are you ready to sing?”
“Yes.”
“That’s good.”
“Do you think Darren will show up?”
“I hope so. You’ve both worked very hard on this, haven’t you?”
“Yes.”
“Then I’m sure he will.” Grandma takes Stacey’s hand to help her off the stool. “Your sister and Grandpa are waiting for us in the car.”
***
Stacey is relieved to see the crazy lady isn’t there. Though Maddy said she’s a grown-up, she still sits on her booster seat; her big butt hangs over the edges. She wears a yellow dress that’s even tighter on her belly than Stacey’s dress is. Her hair is up in a bun that’s supposed to make her look more like an old lady.
“You look nice,” Stacey says, to apologize for earlier.
“Tanks. You wook nice too.” Stacey knows Maddy said it in that silly lisp so Stacey will forgive her for earlier.
The lisp works. “I’m sorry about what I said.”
“I’m sowwy too.”
“You can stop doing that.”
“What?”
“The wisp. I know you’re faking it.”
“Sorry,” Maddy says. She emphasizes the R’s.
“It’s OK.” They hug briefly, but barely touch so they won’t mess up their dresses or hair.
They don’t say a lot as Grandpa drives them into the city. Grandma looks back a few times to check on them. She doesn’t say anything either. This gives Stacey time to think about Darren. She hopes he’ll be there. If he’s not, then she’ll know he doesn’t really love her. She remembers what Grandma said about them. “Grandma, what’s puppy love?” Stacey asks.
“Oh, that? It’s just a silly old expression grown-ups use to describe children who are madly in love.”
“What’s it got to do with puppies?”
“I don’t know, dear. I suppose because puppies are children too.”
“So when you said Darren and I had puppy love, you meant because we’re kids?”
“That’s right, dear.”
“You and Grandpa aren’t puppy love?”
Grandpa snickers at this. “We stopped being puppies a long time ago, kid.”
“So what is it when old people love each other?”
Grandpa looks over at Grandma and smiles. “That’s true love,” he says. He takes his eyes off the wheel to kiss Grandma’s lips. “Gross,” Stacey mutters.
There are a lot of cars at St. Andrew’s. It’s impossible to see Dr. Macintosh’s SUV among all the other vehicles. She doesn’t see Mr. Borstein’s car either. Jamie said he would be here tonight, that he promised he would have to die to not be here. Stacey hopes it doesn’t come to that.
Grandpa drops them off at the admin building, just like their first day. Also like their first day Dr. Armey is there, but not with her stupid son. She smiles down at Stacey and Maddy. “Hello, Stacey. Hello, Madison. Aren’t you both looking cute?”
“Thank you,” they say together.
“The parents are all going into the auditorium,” Dr. Armey says to Grandma. “Stacey and Madison should report to their homerooms before they go down to the auditorium.”
“I’m sure you children know the way,” Grandma says. “Stacey, make sure your little sister gets there all right.”
“Yes, Grandma.” Stacey takes Maddy’s hand. “Come on, let’s go.”
Some of the older kids serve as guides to lead the parents to the auditorium. Stacey looks for Jamie, but doesn’t see her until they get to Maddy’s homeroom. Jamie waits for her there in the blue dress she bought. She has her hair in a French braid and wears a little more makeup than Stacey.
“There you are. I figured you’d get here eventually.” Jamie bends down to pinch Maddy’s cheek. “You look real cute.”
“Thank you,” Maddy says.
Stacey lets go of Maddy. Unconcerned if anyone sees her, she gives Maddy a hug. “Good luck,” she says.
“You too.” Maddy goes a step farther and kisses Stacey’s cheek. Then she rushes inside to show off her dress and hair to all her friends.
“You look cute too,” Jamie says. She tries to pinch Stacey’s cheek, but Stacey bats her hand away.
“Stop that!”
“I’m just kidding.”
They walk down the hall to Stacey’s homeroom. “Have you seen Darren?” Stacey asks. “He wasn’t at school today.”
“I haven’t seen him today either. It’d be just like that freak to leave you hanging.”
“He’s not a freak. He’s my boyfriend,” Stacey says.
“Fine, you’re both freaks.” When Stacey frowns, Jamie grins at her. “Gotcha.”
“Stop it! I’m serious. I love him.”
“I’m sorry. I’m sure he’ll be here. Or he might have gone to the auditorium already to tune up the piano or something.”
“Maybe.” Stacey figures the only way to find out is to go inside. She gives Jamie a hug just like Maddy. “Good luck to you too.”
“Hey come on, I’m not hardly doing anything. I just have two sentences about the Berlin Wall falling down.”
“Oh.”
Jamie leans forward to kiss Stacey’s cheek the way Maddy did. “I can’t wait to hear your singing. I’m going to record it on my phone so everyone can hear it. Maybe even some record producer will hear it and give you a contract.”
“Shut up.”
“It could happen.”
“Unlikely.”
“Well, there’s always a first time.” They hug again and then Jamie hurries away to get to her homeroom.
Stacey goes into her classroom to find Darren isn’t there. She tries not to show any reaction to this. She just goes over to the desk where she usually sits, away from everyone else. She wishes she had her phone, but she left it at home. All she can do is stare at the floor and wait.
“Looks like someone got dumped,” Keshia says with a triumphant sneer.
Stacey continues to stare down at the floor. There’s nothing she can say. Keshia is right.
***
Darren isn’t in the auditorium either. He really is going to ditch her. The fourth grade is huddled in a corner of the backstage area to wait for their turn. Stacey sees Jamie with her class. They exchange waves, but can’t leave the group now. Maddy is near the front of the backstage area. She’s like a second teacher as she
appraises the appearance of her classmates. She actually forces one girl to take out her pigtails so Maddy can retie them to look more even.
From backstage, Stacey hears Dr. Armey’s voice say, “Welcome parents, alumni, and future students of St. Andrew’s Academy. Tonight we are here to celebrate one hundred fifty years of providing the best elementary and intermediate education in the world.”
The headmaster stops to wait for applause. She continues, “Tonight our elementary classes will perform for you as a tribute to the events and people that have shaped the last hundred fifty years. We will begin with the kindergartners performing a skit on the founding of St. Andrew’s Academy.”
There’s more applause while Mrs. Cohen literally pushes the kindergartners onto the stage. Stacey doesn’t watch, but she can hear how stupid it is. Most of the babies don’t even know their lines. One starts to cry and runs backstage. Stacey hopes Maddy doesn’t do that or suck her thumb or any of the other baby things she does.
There’s undeserved applause as the babies finish their skit. To make room backstage they go directly to sit in a row reserved for them. Dr. Armey takes the microphone to say, “And now our first graders will present a tribute to the presidents of the United States over the last hundred fifty years.”
Stacey breaks away from her class so she can peek through a gap in the curtain to watch Maddy. Since they start with Lincoln, Maddy stands off to the side with the others. Being the bossiest kid in her class, she continues to hiss into the ears of the other kids, probably to remind them of their lines.
After about ten minutes, it’s time for Maddy to perform. There’s a boy on stage with her to play Mr. Roosevelt. He sits in a wheelchair, which is how he was cast for the part. Maddy delivers her first line on time; she puts her hand to her head and sounds overly dramatic. “Oh, Franklin, I’m so afraid this terrible Depression will never end.”
“Relax, Eleanor. We have nothing to fear but fear itself,” the boy says. He’s robotic, but he gets the lines right. He’s probably scared of what Maddy will do if he doesn’t.
Another boy holds up a posterboard sign that says in shaky letters, “Twelve years later…”
They couldn’t put the wheelchair boy on a bed, so he leans back in his chair as much as he can. Maddy kneels down next to him. She wipes his forehead with a handkerchief. “Oh, Franklin,” she says again, “don’t leave us. I need you. America needs you to end this awful war.”
“I’m sorry, Eleanor, but I can’t.” The boy is still robotic, even when he touches Maddy’s cheek. “But be secure in the know-ledge,” he says, tripping over the big word, “that our nation will be in safe hands.”
Maddy pushes the boy back to the side of the stage. As she does, she looks back. Stacey gives her a thumbs-up. Maddy smiles and her cheeks redden with pride. Then Stacey retreats to prepare for her part of the show.
***
The second graders do a presentation on inventions of the last hundred fifty years. Stacey doesn’t pay any attention to them. She finds a chair to sit on while she worries more and more Darren won’t show up. She’ll have to go up there alone and stand all by herself on stage with all those eyes staring at her. She won’t even have Darren’s piano to accompany her.
It’s not fair. This is Grandma’s fault. If she hadn’t been so mean, Darren would be here and they could hold hands somewhere as they wait for their turn. Grandma scared him off, made him afraid to be near Stacey. That or she turned Darren’s uncle against them to keep Darren out of the presentation. Does his uncle really want him to fail the project? This is half of their grade for the semester; an F will make it hard for Darren to even pass the fourth grade. Is that what the adults want?
Keshia is happy to add to Stacey’s misery. “Your boyfriend hasn’t shown up yet, has he?”
“He’s not my boyfriend,” Stacey says. “I don’t even like him.”
“That’s not what I hear. I hear you two have been kissing all over the place.”
“Have not.”
Keshia puckers her lips. She kisses at the air. “Oh, Darren, I love you, I love you. I want to have your weird little babies.”
“Shut up!” Stacey shouts. She tries not to cry so she won’t ruin her makeup.
“You two deserve each other. You’re both losers.”
“We are not!”
“You’re probably going to pee your pants up there and then run away like a stupid little baby.”
“Leave me alone!”
Ms. Lowry hisses at her to be quiet. “Stacey, what is the meaning of this?”
“Keshia’s being mean to me.”
“Both of you be quiet right now or else I’ll fail you.”
That gets Keshia to shut up. She retreats back to her friends. She does give Stacey a victorious smile. Darren won’t be here and Stacey will do terribly and get a D for the entire project.
No longer caring about her makeup, she turns her head to the corner and cries. She probably looks like a baby to the others, but she doesn’t care about that either. All she cares about is Darren. Where is he?
***
The thirdies finish their presentation on sports. Dr. Armey announces, “Our fourth graders will now present the arts.”
It’s time for them to march onto the stage. Stacey is last; she trudges behind the others as if she’s on her way to an execution. She might as well not even bother.
Then she feels someone tap her shoulder. Keshia is already on stage so it can’t be her. Her heart leaps with joy to see Darren there. “Darren!” she squeals. She throws her arms around his neck. “You made it!”
“Sorry I was late. There was an accident or something holding up traffic.”
“Likely story.” She motions to her cheeks that are all smudged now from her tears. “Look what you did.”
“I’m sorry. It wasn’t my fault.”
“What about class today? Why weren’t you there?”
“I was too nervous.” He pats his stomach. “I didn’t eat anything all day so I won’t throw up later.”
“Gross!”
Ms. Lowry appears, her arms crossed and face red. “What are you two doing? Get on stage immediately.”
“Yes, ma’am,” Stacey says. She takes Darren’s hand to lead him onto the stage.
They stand off to the side with the others to wait for their turn. She doesn’t pay attention to the others; she whispers into Darren’s ear, “I missed you so much. I thought you didn’t like me anymore.”
“I could never stop liking you.”
“Even if I were mean like Keshia?”
“You could never be as mean as her.”
She giggles a little and covers her mouth with her hand so they won’t get yelled at. “Probably not. Unless you do something like that again.”
Keshia’s presentation on the 1910s and ‘20s is right before theirs. Lacy Doubletree is her partner. They’re both dressed in period costumes. Keshia sets up a CD player to go with her presentation. It starts to play some kind of marching band music. Keshia just about pushes Lacy forward to begin. “This music was very popular with people a hundred years ago,” Lacy says flatly.
Keshia takes over a couple minutes later. Her presentation is on jazz music. “My great-grandpa was a jazz musician in the Roaring Twenties. He played with people like Louis Armstrong and Duke Ellington. This is him playing the trumpet,” Keshia says. She stops so everyone can hear the music. “He was one of the greatest musicians of the era. Isn’t that right, Great-Grandpappy?”
A spotlight comes on. Stacey sees an old black man stand up at the back of the auditorium. His face is so wrinkled he looks like a raisin. He must be a hundred years old. That doesn’t stop him from lifting a trumpet. The notes are a little unsteady, but the audience roars with applause as he plays. Keshia turns to Stacey and grins triumphantly.
“That’s not fair,” Stacey growls. “He’s doing most of the work.”
“I can’t believe that’s her great-grandfather,” Darren says.
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“It’s probably not. It’s probably just some old man she paid.”
“Don’t worry, your singing will make everyone forget about this.”
“And your piano playing.”
The old man finishes and then takes his bows. The audience still applauds long after he sits down. Keshia applauds too. Everyone but Stacey does. That big rat, Stacey thinks. She hopes Darren is right, though right now she doubts it.
***
It takes three janitors to wheel the piano into place. It’s a grand piano like Darren has. In fact, it’s exactly like Darren’s piano. “Did you bring your piano?”
“Why do you think it took so long?”
She has to resist the urge to kiss him right there in front of everyone. “Here we go,” she says. A smatter of applause welcomes them to the stage. As they practiced, Stacey takes the microphone. Darren noodles around on the piano to get his fingers ready to play.
Stacey puts the microphone to her lips. She sees hundreds of faces out there, none of them familiar. She wishes she could see Grandma, Grandpa, and Maddy right now so she wouldn’t feel so alone. Out of the corner of her eye she sees Keshia with an evil grin.
“Hi,” Stacey whispers into the microphone. She takes a deep breath and tries to focus on the script they wrote. “During the Depression and World War II, America’s spirits were very low at times. Music helped them through these troubled times. There was still jazz, but new forms took root as well. Perhaps one of the best-known artists of this era was named Cole Porter. My grandpa says he wrote some of the greatest love songs ever.” Stacey pauses to wait for the audience’s laughter to die down. Darren wrote that joke; he said it would sound cute when she said it.
Once the laughter has faded, she continues, “We’d like to take a few minutes to introduce you to this wonderful music that lifted so many spirits.”
That’s Darren’s cue. He’s right on time. The problem is with her. Her stomach begins to churn so violently she can feel the lasagna from dinner in her throat. She’s going to choke—literally if not figuratively.
Darren’s such a pro that he doesn’t miss a beat; he circles around to pick her up just like they did in practice when she missed something. She’s so lucky to have him for a partner. He’s so sweet and considerate. Too bad she’s such a mess.
Chances Are Omnibus (Gender Swap Fiction) Page 52
