by Mary Twomey
My left field question caught Jens off-guard. “Yeah.” He handed me to Jamie, who lowered me down the other side of the felled tree.
“You were there when I ran out the lease on our last apartment?” I asked as the three of us trudged between the mangled trees.
His answer was hesitant this time. “Yeah.”
That was a blow. “Like, keeping watch from outside?”
“Sometimes.”
“And sometimes you were… You saw… You saw?”
“I wasn’t planning on bringing it up if you weren’t, but yeah. I’m the one who told Alrik and made him cross over and get you.”
I straightened and forged onward through the trees and underbrush, wishing I had the ability to turn invisible and run away. “Gotcha. We almost there?”
Jens walked on my other side with obvious concern. “Don’t be like that.”
“Be like what? How am I supposed to be? No one was supposed to see that. It’s private.”
“It’s my job!”
“Yep.” I tried to outpace him, but his legs were far longer than mine. As my steps quickened, so did his. I was a wash of angry and humiliated, so I did the only logical thing I knew of. The method taught me by my parents from childhood. Rule #4: When you want out, run. So I picked up my skirts and bolted forward in the direction I was pretty sure we were supposed to go. I was livid when Jens ran with me. “Let me go!”
“You know I can’t do that! Just calm down.”
I ran faster, and Jamie trotted behind us. We reached the place where Uncle Rick had left horses tied up for us. They were brown, big and beautiful, but I couldn’t appreciate them at the moment. I wished I was a cowboy, so I could hoist myself up and ride away as fast as I could to escape the man who’d seen me at my worst.
“Lucy, I’ve never told anyone but Alrik what you almost did. If it helps, the weekend he came and stayed with you in your new place, I wasn’t there.”
I tried to climb up on the horse, but there was no saddle and thus no stirrups to step into. As with the rest of Undraland, everything was a foot taller than normal, including the horses. Plus, I was in a heavy dress, not chaps or jeans or whatever John Wayne wore.
When Jens put his hands on my waist to lift me, I whirled on him. “Don’t you touch me!” I tried three more times, growing angrier as hot tears threatened to appear and give me away. When I realized there was no way I could get up there on my own, I nearly screamed in childish frustration. “I’ll walk.”
“Get back here. Come on, Loos. You have no idea where we’re going or how many miles it is. You can’t walk there.”
I did not respond. I knew if I spoke, it would either be juvenile or reveal too much hurt. I’d already unwittingly shown enough emotion in front of him.
“Miss Lucy, may I escort you?” Jamie asked, grasping at a way to be helpful.
I slowed my escape and turned. “Is it really miles to the tavern we’re meeting the others at?”
“Even on the horses, we won’t make it there until nightfall.”
“Are you telling me the truth?” I questioned. “You’re not just being the wingman?”
Jamie held up one hand in promise and placed the other over his heart. “I assure you, I have no wings.”
I nodded and went back to the horse, hating that I needed help to get on. Jamie lifted me and placed me atop one. I wasn’t really sure if I was supposed to ride sidesaddle, but it didn’t seem very safe without an actual saddle. I positioned myself the way John Wayne would have, not Princess Buttercup, despite my current wardrobe.
Three people, two horses. When Jens looked like he was about to slide on the horse behind me, I growled at him, barked like a dog and gave him my best don’t-you-dare stare.
“Would you do me the honor of riding with me, Miss Lucy?” Jamie asked graciously, trying to avoid another fight between Jens and me. Wingman, indeed.
Jens gave me a hard look before he backed off. “Making sure you’re safe doesn’t just mean protecting you from Weres. It also means that sometimes I have to protect you from yourself. You have no right to be mad at me for seeing what I saw and calling Alrik.”
Deep, deep down, I knew I shouldn’t be this mad at him. Right after everyone in my life died, I went home from the crematorium to an empty apartment. I locked myself inside for weeks until the rent ran out. The last few days I was there, I had a Mexican standoff with the largest kitchen knife we owned, a bottle of pills and vodka, and a rope I’d gone so far as to hang in the doorway of my parents’ bedroom. For days I stared down the pills. I’d dump them on the floor, count them out and give each one a reason why I shouldn’t kill myself.
Pill one: My family would be pissed if they were alive to see this.
Pill two: It would be the fourth death Uncle Rick would have to suffer inside a month. Probably not nice to do that to him.
Pill three: I didn’t want to die without seeing the Polyphonic Spree in concert. That just seemed like a complete waste of a life.
Pill four was where I always drew a blank. Three reasons to live were all I could muster. It had been enough in the end, but only just. There were several days that I’d come very close to ending it all. There were more reasons to die than to survive.
Then Uncle Rick came. He took me out to dinner. It was the first meal I’d had in who knows how long, and when we got back, all my belongings had been moved to a one-bedroom apartment in a new town. He’d put down first and last month’s rent, set me up with the job bagging and checking at the grocery store, enrolled me in community college, kissed my cheeks and left. I was alone until Tonya and Danny moved in.
None of that was for Jens to see. It was private, and part of me that was supposed to be only mine. Job or not, no one wants to be seen as an emaciated suicidal mess crying on the floor of an empty apartment with no one who cared enough to pick her up, or even visit.
Twenty-Seven.
Merry Band of Thieves
I gritted my teeth against the horse’s wide gallop for the first half hour, and then my body adjusted. I relaxed against Jamie’s chest, and at one point even closed my eyes as the rhythm of the hooves lulled me to rest. Thank goodness I wasn’t driving this thing.
Jamie held the reins with his arms on either side of me. He said nothing of my anger, and after a while his gentle demeanor quieted my rocking emotions so I only felt sad. Sad for all the loss, sure, but it was more than that. As the sun began to dip below the rolling green horizon, I let the horse and the steady heartbeat of the man pound out my sorrow and frustration with the hand I’d been dealt.
Jamie rested his cheek to my temple. “Sleep, Queen Lucy. Jens means you no harm. A finer man I’ve never known.”
I said nothing to this, but instead closed my eyes. I had never fallen asleep on a real live man before. Sure, Linus and I had to bunk up most places we went. Our family generally migrated to one-bedroom apartments. There was no cuddling your brother, though. We had a strict get-out-of-my-space policy, and as a result had grown to be uncommonly motionless sleepers, except during the occasional nightmare. Leaning on Jamie was a comfort I would never admit to needing in that moment, but I was grateful for him all the same.
However many hours later, I felt my body being jostled in a different direction than forward. I opened my eyes to find Jamie lowering me off the horse into the arms of Jens. Part of me wanted to protest, but I was too tired for another round with him. Instead I leaned my head against his shoulder and whispered, “I don’t want to fight anymore.”
“Okay, Loos. Let’s get you up to the room and we can talk about it.”
“I don’t need to talk. I get it.”
He carried me into the Drucken Tavern, and I was too worn out to care how I looked or the crazy things the wind always did with long, wavy hair. Judging by the stink and the clientele, I guessed we were in Tor’s land. The candlelight fell on a dozen or so dwarves in various stages of drunkenness, all with shorter statures and red or black dreadlocks down to their e
lbows.
The grisly innkeeper checked an old piece of paper before handing us a key. “What’s that one ya’ve got there?” he asked Jens, showcasing three missing teeth up top. “That’s not another halfy, is it?”
Suddenly, I was wide awake. I shimmied out of Jens’s arms and stalked to the rude dwarf. “Excuse me?” I said, taking in the 4’9” stout man behind the rickety wooden counter. I could smell his stench from where I was next to Jens.
Jamie postured. “This is Queen Lucy, human female from the Other Side. She’s the first of her kind to venture to the Warf. You will show her respect, Orton.”
Orton took off his hat and bowed his head, looking like he might piss himself. His red frizzy dreadlocks were matted at the top of his head, looking like insect nests might be holing up in the crannies. I lifted my chin with pride as he stumbled over his apology. “I meant no disrespect, yer majesty. Queen Lucy of the Other Side, please take my best room. We’ve got oak-matured Gar you’ll like, and I’ll have the maid bring ya up some supper straightaway.”
“What did you do with the halfy?” I asked, my tone ominous.
“We don’t let that kind in here, yer grace. Ya don’t have ta worry ’bout him soiling the place. We run an upscale establishment here, we do. Not like those quacks in Elvage.”
My jaw didn’t move as I pushed out the words. “Where is he?”
Orton motioned back out the door to the night. “He’s in the barn with the horses.”
Maybe it was the late hour. Maybe it was the smell or the long ride here. I don’t know. But something in me snapped at Mace being segregated from the others and shoved in with the animals. “You put my brother in the stables?” I asked through my clenched-together teeth.
Orton’s ruddy face drained of all color, making his smattering of freckles stand out all the more. “Yer brother? No one told me ya were related ta the halfy. I wouldn’ta…”
“Wouldn’t have treated my brother like a dog? You’re lucky I don’t unleash my human powers of…” I tried to think of something scary enough. Angry girl face? Vicious rhetoric? No, it had to be something with an actual threat behind it. “You’re lucky I don’t unleash the powers of Vin Diesel on you!” Jens snorted behind me, but I didn’t care. I kept my nose in the air as I spoke. “Please send word to Alrik’s room that I will be sleeping in the barn with my brother.”
“What? No, no. Yer grace, please. I meant no harm!”
“No. If my brother isn’t good enough for you, then neither am I. By morning, word will spread that you made Queen Lucy sleep in the barn with the animals. Hopefully this is the last time you’ll act so hatefully toward someone who’s different than you.”
Orton stammered incoherent apologies, offering me everything short of the sun and moon to stay in a proper room and not in the barn.
Life certainly had some strange twists and turns. There had been quite a few times when my family had to bolt in the middle of the night and crash in a skeezy motel for a week while Mom and Dad found us a new apartment. There had been quite a few that had no rooms for rent, or some that charged us an arm and a leg for the most disgusting, filthy room imaginable. We took rooms filled with who knows what kind of gag-inducing fluids in the sheets because that was all we could get.
This was payback. If my family were here, they would cheer me on.
Jens sighed, and I realized my victory was short-lived. We stepped outside into the night air that had the beginnings of a chill to it, and I began to regret my decision. The temperature swings were pretty drastic. Summerishly warm during the day, and chilly fall temps at night.
Martin Luther King, Jr. Martin Luther King, Jr.
I turned to my ever-present shadow. “Look, you don’t have to go with me, Jens. There’s no danger.”
Jens rubbed his hands over his face. “You know I go with you. It’s fine. I get it. Probably would’ve done the same thing if it was Britt.”
“Mace can keep watch. I’ll be safe.”
He rolled his eyes. “Oh, that makes me feel so much better. The only male Huldra who somehow has a mind-controlling whistle. Sure. I’ll leave you alone with him. No problem.”
“Okay, Sarcasmo. That was me trying to let you off the hook. Take it or leave it.”
“Leave it,” he ruled, adjusting the red pack on his back. “Goodnight, Jamie. Tell the others we’ll see them in the morning.”
Jamie stood straighter. “I’m going with you. I couldn’t possibly go against Queen Lucy’s decision. It’ll get around that I favored the racist, and I cannot have that. People are starting to see your land and mine as a united front, what with me escorting you through Undraland. Best it stays that way.”
I turned and hugged Jamie around his middle since I only came up to his shoulder. “Don’t be a fool. Britta’s up there, and she’s been worried sick about you. This is your one shot to actually spend some time with her away from your dad’s prying eyes.” I shook my head into his chest, taking note that he was growing decidedly less rigid around me the more time we spent together. “Plus, if you stay in the barn with me, people will think we’re doing it. That won’t help you much back home.”
His finger went under my chin and lifted it so I was looking up at him, his brown eyes taking in the details of my face in the moon’s red light. “I’ve never met a lady who spoke as plainly as you do. I’m not sure I like it.”
I smiled up at him and winked. “I’m not sure I care if you do.” I shrugged. “Whatever. I talk normal for where I come from. In my experience, it’s the not talking about it that gets people into trouble.”
“Fair enough.” Jamie looked around to make sure no one was around to see, and then kissed my forehead. Warmth spread through me at the affection that was both platonic and familial all at once.
“Go get your girl, tiger.” I chucked his arm, and we shared a smile of mutual appreciation before he trotted off into the tavern.
Jens wrapped his arm around my back and walked with me to the stables, his demeanor suddenly tenderer than his usual abrasiveness. “You sure you want to sleep in the barn?”
“I’m sure I would never leave my family out in the cold. It’s all of us or none of us. That’s the deal.”
“You sure attached to that Mace kid pretty fast.”
“Kid? Isn’t he your age? How old are you, anyway?” A flash of dread washed over me. “Alrik’s three-hundred-something years old. Please tell me you’re younger than that.”
He chuckled. “I’m twenty-eight. I’ve got three years on Mace, so I have the right to call him a kid.”
“Be nice to my new brother, okay? I need this to work.”
“I get it. I will.” When I gave him a look of disbelief, he grew defensive. “When am I not nice?” Jens opened the stable doors and called out to Charles. “Mace, you here? It’s just us.”
I heard hay moving, and then saw silver and black eyes glinting off the dim lantern light. “Lucy?” Charles stood and ran toward us. “I’m so glad you made it! I was worried they’d taken you hostage or something.”
He hugged me tight, and I could feel his worry. “Nope. Just the longest tea party of my life. I can’t believe they made you sleep here! And where’s Uncle Rick? Isn’t he pissed?”
“I don’t understand what that word means. I thought I did, but now I don’t know. Alrik checked us in and then split off with Tor. He’s trying to feel out a few contacts he and Tor have here to see if we can get some help.”
If I’d ever called my dad Rolf, there would’ve been a swift reckoning. I didn’t completely understand Charles and Uncle Rick’s dynamic.
“But why? Isn’t it best if no one knows what we’re doing?”
Charles pulled back and looked at me with wonder, like he was afraid I might not be real. “Word’s spread to the dwarves that the portal in Elvage was in jeopardy, so they’re placing a security detail around theirs. We’ll need someone on the inside to help get Tor close enough.”
Jens stiffened. “In jeopard
y? Didn’t Alrik destroy it?”
“No. Alrik got two whole bones knocked down, but then it was too well guarded to destroy more of it without being seen. Almost didn’t get away fast enough, but we cleared the area with the others just before the army descended. We’re lucky we got out of there when we did. The portal’s still working, though. Every single bone has to be torn down for the pathway to be finished.”
“I’m just glad you’re okay,” I admitted, hugging him in the lantern’s light.
Mace’s head rested on mine, and I could tell he was happy. He gave a contented sigh when he kissed my hair. “I am, and you are. You should go on up to bed, dear sister. I’ll see you in the morning.”
“Oh, no. I’m not staying in there if you’re out here. I’m sleeping in here tonight. So is Jens.”
Mace looked horrified. “But, no! You can’t sleep out here. It wouldn’t be right. You’re Queen Lucy! Go back inside. I’ll be fine. Trust me, it’s nothing I’m not used to.”
I glared up at him. “If they won’t have you, they don’t get me. Let’s see him try to book a room after word spreads that he made Queen Lucy and her family sleep in his barn. Superior butthole.”
“But I… you shouldn’t… No, Lucy. You’ll catch your death out here on a night like tonight. It’s already getting cold. It’s not worth it. Alrik’s been trying for ages to get them to accept me. It’s no use.”
I tossed him a simpering smile. “Oh, Charles. I’m way more stubborn than Uncle Rick. Don’t you know that by now?”
“No. I won’t let you.” He tried to appear firm, but I could sense an easy takedown a mile away.
“It’s done. You better not’ve taken all the good hay.”
Jens poked his head out from one of the stalls. “Get in here, Queen of the Barn.”
Jens was always doing that. Disappearing and then reappearing when I wasn’t expecting it. There was a joke on the tip of my tongue about enjoying a roll in the hay, but I didn’t think it was appropriate in front of Mace, who I was still feeling out.
I turned around when I heard Nik and Foss arguing out in the night. The barn door slammed open, letting in a gust of chilly, yet fresh air. The horses really smelled like, well, animals. “Hey, guys. If it isn’t my favorite band of thieves. And Foss.”
