“I don’t know if I’d use those words,” I said softly, “but it’s certainly a bit more extreme than when my dad would buy me ice cream.” I cracked a smile and was grateful to see him do the same.
“So, we can leave after work tonight? We can fly around in the chopper while we’re there,” he said with a smirk.
Before I could answer, my phone vibrated against my stomach. “It’s my mom. Shit.”
“You should probably answer it.”
“Yeah, I guess. Give me one second.” I pushed off the covers and moved to the window as I pressed the phone to my ear.
“Hi, Anna.”
“Everything okay, Mom?” A slow twitch of fear curled tightly inside my stomach.
“Anna—I don’t know how to tell you this, but Java’s in pretty bad shape.”
My palm went to the window to ground me. I was ready to fall. “What?”
Adam was behind me in a flash, his hand on my back.
“Baby, she has a tumor. Doc Jones says we should put her down. She’s in a lot of pain, and he said the cancer has spread through her body, and there’s nothing we can do.”
“No . . . no, I don’t accept that.” I couldn’t raise my head or look over at Adam.
“Doc says we need to do this soon. This last week she’s gone from bad to horrible, Anna. It’s what’s best for her. She’s old and suffering.”
“When?”
“This weekend.”
“Wait for me, please.”
“Anna—”
I knew what my mom was going to say. We couldn’t afford for me to take an extra international flight, but I didn’t give a damn about money right now. “I’ll charge it to my credit card. End of story.” I rushed a hand to my face as liquid gathered in my eyes.
There was a long tick of silence from the other end of the phone.
“Call me back when you know your flight,” my mom finally agreed.
I couldn’t speak. I croaked out some form of goodbye and then turned to Adam, pressing my face straight into his chest. I cried harder than I thought possible. He held me tight, rubbing my back, trying to calm me.
“My horse is going to die,” I said, my voice breaking with tears.
“I’m so sorry, Anna.”
I pulled back and swiped at my face, sniffling. “I’m gonna go home today.”
“I’ll go with you.”
“What? No.” I moved away from him in search of my laptop to book a ticket. “I’ll go for the weekend and be back by Monday. Or Tuesday, at the latest.” I flipped open the laptop and powered it on, my fingers shaking as they hovered above the keyboard. “Will John have a problem with that?”
“I’ll talk to him, don’t worry about that. But, please, Anna—”
I faced him as the salty liquid dripped down my cheeks in a constant stream. “No buts, remember?” I choked out.
Twenty-Four
Anna
My fingers slipped through Java’s thick, silky brown mane. She was lying on the ground, her legs crossed, moaning, even though the vet had given her some powerful painkillers. I’d never understood about a heart breaking until now. It was like someone had a fist around my heart and was squeezing tight enough to crush it.
Java raised her head, a black glossy eye on me. She nudged her face against mine, setting off the tears again.
I gently held her neck, hugging her as I cried.
“Anna, there’s someone here to see you.” My mother’s voice flowed softly through the air.
I looked back over my shoulder as I brushed tears from my face. My vision was blurred by tears, but could it really be him? Here?
“Hi.” Adam’s hands were at his sides as if he was trying to keep his cool and remain casual before my mom. He looked out of place in this barn, even though he was wearing jeans and a navy T-shirt. Although I had told him not to come, all I wanted to do was run to him and tuck myself inside his arms.
I pushed off my knees and up to my feet, worried that my legs would buckle and I’d collapse. “You came.”
“I wanted to be here for you, Anna.” He took a small step forward and hesitated, looking for a cue on how he should act around my mother.
I crossed the stable to meet him near the arched entrance, and I did the only thing that made sense. I pulled myself against him. A hiss escaped his lips as his arms went to my back and held me tight. His hand cupped my head, his fingers slipping through my hair as I cried into his chest.
I was crying for Java, of course. But I think I was also crying for myself—for the tears I had never shed in front of my mother, for the truth I had kept bottled inside me. Only Java had known. She had been my only confidant.
“Anna?”
I stepped back from Adam, and his arms fell to his sides. My mother’s green eyes studied me, a mask of confusion swirling in the faint lines on her face. “What’s going on? This man said he knows you from Dublin?”
“Um.” I dragged my palms down my face and tried to catch my breath. My chest vibrated as the emotions continued to swell inside me.
My father was walking down the hill toward the stables.
My tall, strong, silver-haired father still thought of me as a six-year-old with pigtails. When I’d told him about my sudden decision to go to Ireland, he’d about lost his mind.
“And you might be?” My father crossed his arms, standing rigidly next to my mom. He must not have been in the house when Adam arrived.
“I actually work at the company Anna interns for.” Adam approached my dad and extended his arm.
My dad’s gray brows came together suspiciously as he eyed Adam’s arm.
I breathed a sigh of relief when their palms clasped.
“Adam actually does a little more than that.” My voice was raw from all my crying. “Adam owns the company. He’s Adam McGregor, as in McGregor Enterprises,” I said with pride in my voice.
“Since when do billionaires cross an ocean to visit an intern because her horse is dying?” My dad’s eyes were sharp on Adam, trying to stare him down, but Adam remained standing tall. His sexy Irish voice would have probably had my mom swooning if she weren’t mourning Java and worrying about me. “Anna’s special, as I am sure you are fully aware.” Adam tucked his hands in his pockets.
His response had my heart flipping in my chest.
“Hm. Well, I came down here to tell you the doc is in the house. I told him to give you a few more minutes before he comes down,” my father said in a low voice—completely shattering me.
***
The stable felt empty.
It wasn’t, of course. We had several other thoroughbred horses inside, but without Java, it wasn’t right. Even the other horses were in mourning. All were lying down with their heads tucked to their chests. They knew she was gone.
I wasn’t sure if I ever wanted to come back here again.
I shut my eyes, and my mind drifted to memories of my time with Java. I remembered her power and strength—her beautiful soul. I could see it whenever she had looked me in the eyes. There were those who would say an animal doesn’t have a soul—well, I disagreed.
I looked out the window of the stable. The cool air on my arms was barely noticeable. I felt so numb.
Adam was stuck inside the house with my parents, but I knew he could handle my father. The man went toe-to-toe with business people all over the world and thugs in the ring.
But I needed to be alone.
The sun had set, the sky was dark, and there were no stars in sight. My world was tilted off its axis.
Something didn’t feel right, and it wasn’t only because of my loss.
I wasn’t “Kentucky Anna” anymore. I’d been in Dublin for five weeks now, and whether it was Dublin—or Adam—I had changed.
“Hey there.”
I cringed and sucked in a lungful of air, not wanting to turn around.
Jax’s deep voice, now noticeably Southern to me after I’d been hearing the Irish brogue for weeks, sounded so foreign.
“Why are you here?” I turned to face him.
He was casually standing near the first stable, leaning his shoulder against the wall. “Your mother called me.”
“Go,” I forced the word out through my teeth.
“I’m sorry about Java.” He stalked toward me, and I stood frozen. He wouldn’t hurt me here, would he?
The smell of beer on his breath when he closed the gap between us had me clenching my hands in fear.
“Please, leave.”
“God, you’re so beautiful, Anna.” His hand on my cheek had me closing my eyes, my body trembling, worried. “I’ve missed you so much.”
His hand dropped to my shoulder, squeezing it. I flashed my eyes open, trying to remember the meager self-defense techniques I had learned after he’d hurt me.
“Let go of me.”
“You left me. You crossed a damn ocean to get away from me. What is wrong with you?” He tightened his grip as his face came within an inch of mine.
I swallowed as my body became stiff.
“You best let her the fuck go!”
Jax stepped back as he faced Adam. “And who the hell are you?” He tipped up his cowboy hat, and I came up next to Jax, fearing the worst.
“I’m her boyfriend.”
Adam’s words had my attention slipping for a minute, but when I looked down at the veins in his forearms—they were popping as he balled his hands tight at his sides—I knew things were about to get horribly ugly.
“Is this true, Anna? You let this piece of shit—this Mick—go near you?”
“Leave,” Adam warned. He angled his head down, training his eyes on Jax like he would a target.
Jax came around in front of me as if he were trying to protect me, which was absurd. “You’re the one who needs to do the leaving.” He cocked his head, slamming his fist against the palm of his other hand.
I started to come around from behind Jax, but he launched his arm back as I moved. Although he didn’t hit me, I flinched and lost my footing, stumbling back. My butt smacked hard against the ground.
Puffs of dirt floated up as Jax and Adam scuffled in front of me. Jax’s punches never landed, but Adam . . . well, every time he swung there was the hideous sound of flesh and bone.
When Jax’s large body thudded loud against the ground, I scooted back with a wordless cry. Adam kneeled next to him, driving blows to his face. Jax’s head jerked from side to side with each hit. His eyes were shut, and blood was everywhere.
Even on me.
The horses were neighing as horror rose within me. This couldn’t be real. If it could just be a movie, and then I would hit pause . . .
“Stop!” I finally shouted, hoping it wasn’t too late.
Jax might die if he wasn’t already dead.
Adam’s fist stopped shy of Jax’s face, although he still gripped tight the material of Jax’s shirt. He was panting as he looked over at me.
Adam was unrecognizable as the man I knew.
Blood splattered over his face. His eyes were dark.
He released his grip on Jax and stood up. He rubbed a hand over his face and took a step toward me, but I leaned back, terrified.
Adam’s brows drew together, and he rubbed a bloody hand to the back of his neck.
I looked away from him and at Jax. I hated Jax, but I didn’t want him dead, and I didn’t want more guilt crowding Adam’s conscience.
I scrambled over on my hands and knees and was relieved to see Jax’s chest rising and falling.
Thank God. He was breathing.
But his face looked like a canvas painted in red blood.
“Shit, I—” Adam covered a hand over his mouth. He appeared unscathed. As strong as Jax was, Adam was a professional.
“Oh my God!” My mother came flying toward us. “Call an ambulance, Anna!”
I didn’t move.
“Did you hear me, Anna?” she shouted.
Jax was moving a little, and I think his eyes were opening.
I couldn’t seem to respond to my mother. The shock was too much. And I almost didn’t want to call for help.
“Anna!” My mother was in front of me now, gripping my shoulders, practically shaking me.
And then I heard a horrible sound.
The clicking of the chamber—a bullet loaded into my father’s shotgun.
“You do this?” My dad had to be asking Adam, but I couldn’t bring myself to look at anyone. I kept my eyes on the ground as my mother continued to shake me.
“Yes, sir,” I heard Adam answer.
“Tell me why I shouldn’t shoot you right now?”
This had my attention. “No, Dad!” I rushed over, and my father lowered his gun. Adam’s head was hung low, and he stared down at Jax, the veins in his throat strained, the muscles in his jaw tight.
He was still angry, wasn’t he? God, he’d wanted to kill Jax.
“You should leave, Adam,” I said softly.
Adam’s eyes greeted mine. Gone was the anger. There was only pain. Or maybe it was disappointment.
“You ever going to tell them the truth?” Adam stepped in front of me, wiping blood from his lip.
I kept my mouth closed as I placed a hand to my midsection.
Adam shook his head. “That’s what I thought.”
“We’re letting him leave?” My mom was at my side, grabbing hold of my arm, forcing me to look at her, even though I didn’t want to lose sight of Adam as he walked back up the hill and out of sight.
My dad was on the phone with 911, and I sank to the ground. “Mom. Dad. There’s something I have to tell you.”
Twenty-Five
Adam
It had been five years.
But it felt like yesterday.
The rap music didn’t drown out the swooshing of jump ropes and the thwack as they beat against the floors, or the tap-tap of fists connecting with heavy bags. Every noise reverberated through me—the cracking of glove to bag, knuckles to helmets—and I shut my eyes and hung my head for a second.
Don’t do this, I told myself. Turn the feck around.
My left hand curled into a fist at my side as I looked back up.
I couldn’t turn around. I couldn’t leave.
I ignored the stares of fighters as I began to walk straight for one of the practice rings set up in Donovan’s gym.
There were two guys inside, throwing jabs at each other. I kicked off my shoes, dropped my sweats and stepped out from the legs, my shorts brushing lightly against my knees as I did, and then peeled my shirt over my head and flung it on a chair.
One guy stopped moving and lowered his guard when he saw me pop over the rope and step inside. He had blonde corn rows and a chest covered in tats.
“Either of ya willing to spar with me?”
“Adam McGregor. You’re back, eh?” The corn rows guy stepped in front of me.
“Yeah.” I raised my guard, and my attention shifted to my knuckles, finding the evidence of what I’d done to Anna’s ex-boyfriend. “Yeah, I’m back.”
The guy grinned. “Well, shit. I’ll throw down with ya.” He came straight at me, and I dodged his jab and spun around quick, sneaking in a sidekick to his ribs.
“You sure you can take me?” I asked as I noticed people begin to crowd around the ring.
“The fuck I can.” He leaped at me, and we battled a few minutes before I knocked him to his back and wrapped an arm around his neck, locking his feet with my legs in a rear naked choke hold.
He tapped out, and I released my grip and pushed up to the ground.
I shook my head, energy zinging through me. My heart pounded, and a slow roll of excitement gathered inside me as I opened my arms and looked out to the crowd of fighters who had gathered. “Next?”
“You’ve been out of the game five years, and you think you can walk up in here and act like you’re Goddamn better than everyone?” someone hollered from the pack of people.
I cocked my head and waved him up. “I’d be happ
y to prove it to you.”
But the guy didn’t budge.
I looked down at my hands, and Anna came to my mind—the look of fear and disgust on her face . . .
“I need to train. Is there anyone here who wants to spar? I promise I’ll take it easy on ya.”
So I was a cocky bastard when it came to fighting. At this point, what the hell did I have to lose? The only person who’d given me hope was off limits, as she should have been from the moment we met.
“I’ll help you train.”
I looked at the fighter. It was Tommy, one of Donovan’s lackeys.
Oh, hell yes.
***
“You’re going to ruin your perfect ears and get these cauliflower ones like mine. Not sure how you managed to keep yourself looking so damn flawless all these years, but you keep fighting as much as you are . . .”
I stopped the heavy bag from swinging and lowered my fists at the sight of Les on crutches. “I have perfect ears, huh?” I laughed, almost forgetting where I was and why I was there. “What’re ya doing here?”
“Now, shouldn’t I be the one asking?” Les cocked a brow.
I removed my black leather gloves and tossed them. “I’m training. What the hell does it look like?”
“But here?”
“It’s the best gym in the city. You know that.”
“I couldn’t believe my eyes when I got a text that you were here.”
“Well, now that you see me, why don’t you get back to my flat and off your feet.” I tapped at a speed bag, rotating my wrists as I punched.
“What happened, Adam? You wouldn’t be here if something hadn’t gone arseways.”
Jax happened, that’s what.
But, no—I couldn’t blame Anna’s ex. Did it feel good pummeling his face? Yes. But the look on hers after had killed me. It had been a much-needed reminder that I was no good for her.
Once a fighter, always a fighter. The sooner I learned to accept that, the better.
I stopped punching when the tattoo on the inside of my arm caught my eye.
Owen is paralyzed because of me.
What if I killed someone next?
Forever Dublin (Forever #2) Page 22
