No One to Hold

by Arell Rivers

  “Tommy moved in about a month ago. I was living with Sharon for the past two years. She got engaged and moved out. Tommy is her fiancé’s friend.”

  “Are you and Tommy involved?”

  Her head shoots upward. “What? No.”

  “Good.”

  Rose shakes her head. “I don’t think he’s going to be living with me for much longer. The poor guy is in bad shape.”

  “You shouldn’t stay there either. The neighborhood isn’t great. Grandma Gertie can’t keep you safe. I know you want to live within your means, but there has to be somewhere else that you could stay.”

  “I’ve looked around, Cole. For the space and the price, it’s the best place for me.”

  “It’s a long way from downtown. The commuting time and money must eat into your budget.” Practicality seems to be the most sure-fire way to appeal to Rose’s sensibilities.

  “Time is not an issue for me. I’ve budgeted for the commute and my car upkeep. It’s still the best deal.”

  I purse my lips, deciding to table the discussion for now. There’ll be plenty of time to regroup later.

  “Speaking of time, what do you do when you’re not working?”

  “Sleep.”

  “Ha, ha. I’m serious. What do you do in your downtime?” My interest is piqued. “Do you have a boyfriend?”

  “No.”

  “So what takes up your free time?”

  “I’m boring.”

  “Oh, come on,” I say. “Indulge me. Everyone has hobbies.”

  “I don’t have that much free time. I work eighty hours a week, which doesn’t leave too much time for fun. I watch television, spend time with Grandma Gertie, or read to unwind.”

  I’ve clearly delved deeper into her personal life than she would like. I can’t ask her straight up how much money she makes. But the issue of where all her money goes won’t disappear from my brain. Then it hits me. “You send money to your mom, don’t you?”

  Rose looks taken back. I wasn’t supposed to guess that. Following a long pause, she says quietly, “Yeah. It’s the least I can do.”

  That admission endears her to me more than ever. “You’re really special, Rose. I don’t think I’ve ever met anyone like you. I’m lucky to have you in my life.”

  “I’m sure you do the same thing, Cole.”

  I did help out with Mom’s medical bills, but my family has refused all my other offers of financial help. Then again, they don’t need the money.

  Watching her tug at the hem of my T-shirt again, I pick up the bag of clothes and hand it to her. “Why don’t you go shower and change? Maybe by the time you’re ready, the police will have called with an update.”

  She smiles at me. “I won’t be long. Oh, and Cole, it’s been a while since someone has taken an interest in my life story. I want you to know that I didn’t want for anything growing up, and had the most important commodity . . . love, in abundance.” She gets on her tiptoes and gives me a chaste kiss on the cheek.

  ROSE LOOKS LOVELY as she comes down the stairs in one of her new outfits. She’s wearing a black skirt that could be a bit shorter, and a blue print top that shows off her curves but isn’t overtly sexy. Her hair is loose and still wet from her shower. She looks good enough to eat, and I love that she didn’t put her hair in that damned ponytail.

  I inhale her clean scent when she stops in front of me.

  “Yes?” I say, raising my eyebrows.

  “I heard the phone ring,” she says with a devilish smile. “Can I go home?”

  Deciding to torture her a bit, I reply, “Oh, so you heard the phone ring and assumed it was for you? Did you think that maybe someone was calling to speak with me? Maybe Jayson or my Dad? Or one of my friends?”

  “I’m sure you have a long list of people calling you non-stop.” She squints at me through her glasses, as if trying to read my mind. “I know that smirk, Cole! You’re deliberately teasing me. It was the police on the phone, right?”

  How can I resist this playful side of Rose? “Maybe.”

  “When can I go home? Can we go now?”

  “It would seem I have information that you want. Badly. Hmmm, what’s the price of admission?”

  “There’s a price?” she squeaks.

  “Oh, yes. If you want to know who was on the phone, it’ll cost you.” I know what price I’d rather extract, but I’ll settle for this. “One kiss.”

  Rose looks at me, dumbfounded. She clears her throat and responds, “Cole, I’m flattered, but you know we can’t keep doing this. I work for you.”

  At least she isn’t saying her feelings for me are strictly professional. Besides, I’m not surprised by her argument. It’s why it took me so long to explore my interest in her. “I know it’s crazy. If we get involved, we’ll be breaking all sorts of rules. But you’re taking up more and more real estate in my head, and I don’t want to evict you.”

  “Greta has an absolute no fraternization policy. Zero tolerance. I can’t risk my job over . . .” She pauses, chewing on her bottom lip.

  “Over what, Rose?” I’m genuinely interested in how she intended to end that last sentence. I’m also a tad bit scared of where her mind was wandering.

  She blushes and looks down. Now I absolutely need to know what she’s thinking. “Tell me.”

  In a rush, she whispers, “I can’t risk losing my job over a fling that you’ll forget all about by next week.”

  I suck in my breath. Well, I had insisted that she tell me. “Wow, what exactly do you think of me?”

  “Cole, I really like you. You’re smart, funny and crazy-talented. You have a wonderful family. I just don’t see you as the settling down type. And you’re my client. Greta—”

  “I know. Gruesome forbids her employees from hooking up with her clients. Too bad that same edict does not apply to her.” Rose gasps.

  “Not what you’re thinking!” I say. “She propositioned me the first time we met. It was all I could do not to gag.”

  “It’s her company. She can break the rules, but no one else can.”

  “Fuck that, Rose.”

  “You know I’m right.”

  “Also, I’m not looking for a fling, as you put it.” I continue, ignoring her justification for Gruesome. “I’ve had more than my share of those. Not that you have any reason to know this, but ever since Mom died, I’ve been reevaluating my life. One thing she always wanted for me was to settle down. I’ve found myself wanting that, too.”

  Rose looks stunned by that admission. “I didn’t mean to offend you. We already talked about why this job is so important to me. I can’t cross that line.”

  “Do you want to?”

  “I can’t. It doesn’t matter what I do, or don’t, want.”

  “So I guess we’re at a stalemate. For now.” I pause. “I’ll defer your price of one kiss and let you know that yes, the police did call me.”

  Rose doesn’t seem as excited as she did before. “Can I go home now?”

  “Yes. But Rose, I want to help you when we get there. You may need my strength moving furniture and I want to be a shoulder for you to lean on.” She looks skeptical, so I add, “A friendly shoulder.”

  “I’d like that,” she finally admits.

  She goes back upstairs to gather her few belongings and the bag of new clothes. I take the time to try to figure out how I can break down the wall Gruesome put up between us. I don’t want to be the cause of her losing her job if we don’t last past a week or two, but I don’t think that will be the case. My feelings for her are venturing into uncharted territory. I decide to try to spend as much time together with Rose as possible, and let nature take its course. I can be patient. To a point.

  “I’m ready, Cole,” Rose says with a shy smile.

  “Great, let’s go fix up your place. I do want to repeat that I don’t think you should stay there.”

  “Duly noted.”

  FROM THE OUTSIDE, no one would ever know her place had been robbed. If sh
e refuses to move, at the very least I will insist that she install an alarm. No, I’ll do it for her. It’ll be my re-housewarming present to her, so to speak. She won’t like it, but I’ll hate it more if she stays here without one.

  Rose gets out of the car and squares her shoulders. No one would ever accuse her of being timid, that’s for sure. She walks straight up to the front door and pulls out her key. I want to take it from her and open the door; fuck, I want to make this whole thing go away. But I know that she needs to reassert some sense of control over her own home. Take back what was violated.

  We enter the living room and she sucks in her breath. The place is trashed. Papers, broken glass from picture frames and misplaced furniture are everywhere. The insurance company’s website had a form that Rose printed out to inventory the items that were stolen.

  Leave it to Rose to have renter’s insurance for her contents.

  I pull her into my arms and whisper, “I’ll help you get through this, Rose.” To my relief, she lets me embrace her. “Let’s throw away everything that’s broken and put the furniture back into place. Then we can fill out the form from the insurance company.”

  Rose looks up at me and I’m surprised to see she isn’t teary. No, her blue eyes are steely with determination. “Sounds like a good plan, Cole.”

  We get to work.

  About an hour later, we’ve restored the living room to order. Well, mostly. “I need to use your bathroom. Where is it?” Distractedly, Rose points to the hallway and says, “First door.”

  I open the first door and realize it’s not the bathroom. No, it’s Rose’s bedroom. Her inner sanctuary. Which some group of thugs ransacked as thoroughly as the living room. Knowing that I shouldn’t go in, I hesitate for a split second, but I can’t stop myself. We’ll be cleaning this room soon anyway. I’m starving for information about her.

  Her room is painted a light green and has flowered curtains, which surprises me. Despite her name, I didn’t take Rose for the chintz and flowers type of girl. Her furniture is unremarkable except for a vanity that looks antique. Of course, the drawers are all on the floor with their contents strewn about. Her bed is messy, too, with something bright pink right in the center. I walk over to take a closer look and my eyebrows rise sky high. It’s a pink vibrator. Well, well, Rose has a naughty side? I smirk and turn to leave her bedroom before she catches me where I shouldn’t be.

  “Wow, they did a job of it in here, too,” says Rose from the doorway.

  “Yeah. I guess they figured you’d keep all your valuables in your room,” I say, walking toward her.

  Meeting her at the doorway, I say, “Uh, I’m sorry I invaded your bedroom. You said the first door.”

  “That’s okay. The bathroom is that room,” she says, pointing.

  “Thanks. Be right back.”

  I take a step to move around her, but stop when she mumbles something that sounds like, “Oh, my.”

  I turn and follow her line of sight to the bed. Damn. She probably won’t take kindly to being teased about it, especially since the thugs left it right in the middle of her bed to let her know they found it.

  “Uh, Rose?”

  She looks at me with a question in her eyes.

  Be a man, Manchester. It’s not like you’ve never seen or used a vibrator before. I walk back to the bed and pick it up. “I’ll throw this out for you.”

  Rose turns a brighter shade of pink than her vibrator. I take it with me and throw it into one of the many trash bags before making my way to the bathroom. Someday I will tease her about it, but today is not that day.

  When I return to the bedroom, Rose is going through her jewelry box. We both knew that her jewelry would be gone, but from the slump of her shoulders, I could tell she’d still hoped. I walk quietly over to her.

  She looks up at me when I place a hand on her shoulder. “They took all my jewelry, but at least they left this box. Most of my jewelry was costume, except for one piece, but my grandmother gave me the box. She died when I was nine.”

  And the tears I’ve been expecting start to fall.

  I go down on my knee, offering her what little comfort I can. She grips my shoulders, sobbing, and I run my hand up and down her back, trying to alleviate her pain.

  “You still have your jewelry box, Rose. We can fill it with other jewelry, but the box is more important.” It would gut me if someone took anything my mother had given to me, so I can share in her gratitude that she still has this piece of her grandmother.

  A couple of minutes pass before she stops crying and pulls back. “I’ll have plenty of time to cry later. I need to get through this.” With a few sniffles on her part, we tackle the rest of her place, minus Tommy’s room.

  As we’re finishing up in Rose’s office, my cell phone rings. It’s Dan. I excuse myself and answer the call. “Hey, buddy.”

  “Hey, buddy yourself. What’s going on? Who’s this good friend of yours, Tommy, who was beaten up by thugs?”

  Wow, news travels fast. “Don’t get your panties in a twist, Dan. How did you hear about Tommy?” As I say the words, the answer comes to me: Alicia.

  “Alicia mentioned it to Suzanne. I’ve never heard of him before. What’s the deal?”

  “I don’t know Tommy, but he’s Rose’s roommate. It’s a long story, but their rental was hit by a robbery ring. He happened to be home at the time, so they roughed him up. I pretended that Tommy was my friend to give Rose and me a cover. It worked.”

  I can almost see Dan’s eyebrows going up. “So, it’s like that, huh?”

  “Yeah, it’s like that.”

  “Okay. Well, now I understand. Guess you want me to put your next date on hold?”

  I sigh. “I’m pretty into Rose, but she doesn’t think it’s a good idea. Gruesome has a no-fucking-the-clients policy that covers everyone except herself.”

  “I have to agree with Rose, it’s never good to swim in the company pool.” My heart starts to sink, but then he adds, “I also know you, and I don’t think you’re just taking her out for a test drive. Tread lightly, Cole.”

  “I intend to. Listen, I need to get back to her. We’ve been cleaning up her place for the last few hours, and I don’t want her to shoulder this alone. I’ll call you later.”

  “Sounds good. And Cole, be careful.”

  “Always.” I disconnect the call and return to Rose’s office. She’s in the process of tying up a garbage bag.

  “Can you gather all of the garbage bags in the kitchen? I’m going to start bringing them out to the garage.”

  I nod my head in agreement and she takes a bag out.

  I’m heading for the kitchen with four bags in tow when I hear Rose scream from the garage. Dropping the bags, I race out to her. She’s standing at the back of her car, looking madder than hell.

  My heart’s racing. “What’s going on, Rose?”

  She turns and looks at me. Hurt, disbelief, anger and a myriad of other emotions, all at once, cross her face. “Look at this. I can’t believe it.”

  I join her at the back of her car. “What the fuck?” We look at each other. “When did you park your car in the garage, Rose? You must have parked it after the robbery, right?”

  “Yes. I parked it in here when I got home from the beach. I went inside and found the mess and Tommy like . . . that . . . and called 911.”

  “So, someone did this to your car after the thugs had already left.”

  “Yes.”

  “We have to call the police now.” Rose sighs, but she takes the hand I hold out to her and we head back inside together. She finds the card of the officer who’s investigating the robbery and places the call.

  Needing something productive to do, I ask her if she wants anything to drink. As I begin to boil water for her tea, I wonder when this nightmare is going to end. Why would anyone write “Stay Away Bitch” on the back windshield of her car?

  I walk into her living room with the steaming cup of tea. “Here you go, Rose.” She takes
the cup from me and puts it on the coffee table without even taking a sip.

  “Why do that to my car, Cole? I don’t get it.”

  “Let’s hope the police can shed some light on it. They should be here soon, right?” Rose nods. “In the meantime, go pack a bag. There’s no way I’m letting you stay here tonight.” I’m proud of myself for stopping with tonight. I’d be a lot happier if she left today and never returned.

  “You may be my client, but you’re not the boss of me,” she snaps, showing me I wasn’t nearly as suave as I thought I was. In a softer voice, she continues, “Cole, you can’t order me around. I’m perfectly capable of handling this situation.”

  “I didn’t mean to imply that you couldn’t. It’s just that I want you to be safe, and obviously this place isn’t safe. Someone did that to your car after the robbery. Until the cops can find out who did it, I would be more comfortable if you stayed somewhere else. You know I have a guestroom at my house that you can use. Please, Rose, I want you to be safe.”

  Rose closes her eyes. She’s been through so much over the last twenty-four hours. For someone who’s used to controlling everything down to the smallest detail, I can’t imagine the toll this must be taking on her.

  “Greta can’t know.”

  I smile. If that’s her only objection to staying with me, I can handle it. “No problem.”

  She looks at me like she’s looking straight into my soul. I’ve never felt such intense scrutiny. Apparently, I’ve passed some sort of test because she gives me a quick, clipped nod and stands. “I’ll go pack a bag. Can you please let the cops in if I’m not done by the time they get here?”

  “Of course. Pack a bathing suit, too.”

  HOW THE FUCK did I get myself into this situation? When I let Rose choose the evening’s activities, I had no damned clue she would want to do this. Seriously? Who goes to a planetarium except for teenagers who have no other options?

  Shaking my head, I glance at Rose. Well, shit. Her ice blue eyes glitter in anticipation. I’m caught up in her smile. I could gaze at her all day and all night, especially with that look on her face.