Sing As We Go

by Margaret Dickinson

She stared at him for a moment and then capitulated prettily. ‘All right. I hope she likes it.’

  Tony disappeared and as she sat down, George Kendall said, ‘Thanks for this, lass. It’s a rare treat for me to sit down to a meal someone else has made.’

  Kathy picked up her knife and fork and smiled at him archly. ‘Well, it could become a regular habit if you’ll allow me to visit often.’

  The man sighed and wrinkled his forehead. ‘Truth be told, I’d like nowt better, but the missis . . .’

  ‘Ah. Yes. Of course,’ Kathy said gently, but then added briskly, ‘Come on, eat up before it goes cold.’

  They ate in companionable silence, but Tony did not return to the table and the meal Kathy had prepared with such love and care went cold upon the plate.

  ‘It doesn’t surprise me,’ Jemima said tartly when Kathy told her about Beatrice Kendall’s hostile attitude. ‘Not one bit. I did warn you.’

  ‘What’s supposed to be the matter with her?’

  An amused smile played on Jemima’s lips. ‘You’re quick on the uptake, Kathy. No one knows. She’s an invalid. That’s all we know. Heart, probably. But how much of it is real and how much is put on, your guess is as good as mine.’

  Kathy giggled. ‘You mean she enjoys ill-health.’

  ‘Exactly.’ Jemima laughed but then her expression sobered. ‘But it’s George and Tony I feel sorry for. They’re in such a difficult position.’

  ‘Why? Why don’t they just call her bluff?’

  Jemima smiled at her. She was becoming very fond of this rather outspoken but straightforward young woman. She had quite forgiven her for the deception over her blossoming friendship with the store’s young manager. Jemima was honest enough to admit that, in Kathy’s position, she would have done just the same. ‘Think about it for a moment, my dear. How can they? If she really is ill, such an action might precipitate a heart attack and how would they feel then, eh?’

  Kathy was thoughtful for a moment. ‘Yes,’ she said slowly. ‘I do see.’ Then she added vehemently, ‘How – how horrible of her to behave like that.’

  ‘Oh yes,’ Jemima said calmly. ‘She’s horrible all right. I’d even go as far as to say evil. The silly, spiteful woman is not only ruining her own life but George’s and her son’s too. And how – how any mother can – can do that to her own son, I don’t know.’

  To Kathy’s surprise she heard a quaver in Jemima’s voice and the older woman turned her head away quickly and struggled to find her handkerchief. Shocked and at a loss to know what to do or say, Kathy sat silently, but Jemima had recovered in a second and turned back with a bright smile on her face. ‘Tread carefully, Kathy, where Beatrice Kendall is concerned. That’s the only advice I can give you. I can’t tell you not to fall for her son. It’s too late for that, I know. But I’ll tell you now, I just don’t know how much Tony is prepared to stand up to his mother. Not even, my dear, for you.’

  ‘You shouldn’t have done it, Kathy. You could have made her really ill.’

  Kathy stared at him. Was he really so naïve?

  They were standing in Jemima’s front room. He had arrived a few moments earlier and, as he stepped in through the back door, both women had seen the agitation on his face.

  ‘Good evening, Tony,’ Jemima had said calmly, rising from her chair. ‘You two go through to the front. I’ll make some tea.’

  And now they were standing facing each other, Tony with an angry frown on his face, Kathy with shock and disbelief.

  She sighed and put her hand on his arm. ‘Tony, listen to me. She’s not as ill as she’s making out. When you went out of the room, she—’

  ‘How can you say such a thing?’ Tony said harshly, his voice rising in anger. ‘How dare you?’

  ‘I dare because I love you and I can’t bear to see you taken in like this—’

  ‘Taken in? What on earth do you mean, Kathy? And what gives you the right to say such things about my mother. For heaven’s sake, you’ve only just met her. You don’t know her at all. You don’t know the years of suffering she’s borne. How could you?’

  ‘When you went out of the room, Tony, she was perfectly all right. She sat up and told me that you would never marry the likes of me. She’d see to that, she said.’

  Tony stared at her. ‘I don’t believe you. You’re making it up. You—’

  ‘I don’t tell lies,’ Kathy shouted, incensed that he refused to hear a word said against his mother. Was he so blind that he couldn’t see through her devious ways?

  The door swung open and Jemima came into the room carrying a tray with three cups of tea on it.

  ‘Now, you two, just stop this arguing. Sit down and drink your tea and talk about the situation calmly.’ She set the tray down on a low table and sat down. ‘Come along,’ she added briskly as the two younger ones remained where they were, glaring at each other. Woodenly, they moved to sit in chairs either side of the fireplace.

  ‘Now,’ Jemima began as she handed them each a cup of tea. ‘As I’ve told you before, you’re very welcome to meet here if you don’t want Kathy to come to your home, Tony.’

  ‘But I could do so much to help with the housework and the cooking. His poor father looks worn out. He’ll be the one having the heart attack, if they don’t watch out. Not her.’

  ‘She’s no right to say that Mother is malingering. No right at all. She’s only just met her. How can she possibly know?’

  Now they were not talking directly to each other but were using Jemima as a go-between.

  ‘I could tell. When he went out the room, she sat up and spoke normally. The moment she heard him coming, she flopped back on the pillows and acted all weak and faint. And he – ’ she jabbed her forefinger towards Tony – ‘won’t believe me.’

  ‘That’s how her illness is. She can be fine one day. She even does a bit of cooking if she feels up to it . . .’

  Kathy snorted and muttered. ‘I bet that’s not often.’

  Tony glared at her resentfully, but went on, ‘Of course the housework, cleaning and that, is too much for her, but she gets a meal ready for us now and again.’

  ‘Really?’ Kathy murmured, sceptically.

  Jemima sipped her tea thoughtfully. ‘So, Tony, are you really saying that you don’t want Kathy to come to your house any more?’

  ‘Not if she’s going to treat my mother like that, no.’

  ‘And how – exactly – did she treat her? I mean, I realize she’s said things since that you don’t agree with, but surely she didn’t say them to your mother.’ She swivelled to look at Kathy. ‘Did you?’

  ‘Of course not,’ Kathy denied hotly.

  ‘I don’t know what was said when I was out of the room fetching Mother’s pills.’

  ‘I’ve told you – ’ now Kathy was speaking directly to Tony again – ‘she said she’d make sure you never married me.’

  ‘Do you want to know what I think?’ Jemima set her empty cup and saucer back on the tray. ‘Well, I’m going to tell you whether you want me to or not,’ she added. ‘I think that Kathy should continue to visit your home, that she should help with the cooking and perhaps a little cleaning too. Make herself useful. She should treat your mother with respect and make no reference whatsoever – ’ here her tone became even firmer – ‘to your mother’s – er – condition. She should accept it just as you and your father do.’

  ‘You sound as if you don’t believe it either,’ Tony said.

  Jemima shrugged. ‘How can I possibly tell? I haven’t seen your mother for years. Nor am I likely to, except perhaps,’ she added impishly, ‘at your wedding.’

  ‘I don’t think that will be happening for a while yet,’ Tony began, while Kathy looked crestfallen at his words.

  ‘You’re likely to get called up before long,’ Jemima reminded him gently. ‘Wouldn’t you want to get married before you go?’

  ‘I don’t expect to be going. Mother says she’ll be able to organize a deferment.’

  ‘
Really?’ Jemima said dryly. ‘The only way I could see that happening is if you got yourself a job on Kathy’s father’s farm.’

  ‘And that won’t happen,’ Kathy murmured. ‘Not in a million years.’

  ‘Mother will ask her cousin to apply for a deferment for me. I’m needed at the store.’

  ‘If the store remains open, your job could be done by a woman,’ Jemima remarked.

  ‘A woman? A woman as manager?’ Tony laughed.

  But Jemima’s face remained stonily straight. ‘And why not, pray? Women did extraordinary jobs in the last war, so why not in this one? Kathy’s age group might well be called up too, but I won’t be. And for your information, young man, I could do your job standing on my head.’ She got up and picked up the tray.

  ‘Miss Robinson – I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to offend you.’

  ‘You haven’t. I can’t blame you for thinking all women and weak and ineffectual, now can I?’

  It was an oblique reference to his mother and they were all aware of it, but it had been said in such a way that Tony could not accuse her of it. Instead, he rose with a sigh and opened the door for her. As she passed by him, she paused and said, ‘Now the two of you talk this through – sensibly. You have a problem and you must both deal with it.’

  He closed the door behind her, leant against it for a moment and looked across at Kathy. Then he moved towards her and opened his arms wide. With a little sob, she rose and flew across the space between them.

  ‘I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to be horrid about your mother. But I couldn’t bear it if she came between us.’

  ‘I know, I know,’ Tony whispered and stroked her hair. ‘And we won’t let her. I promise. But – but you have to believe me, Kathy. She really is ill. I know she is.’

  Against his shoulder, she screwed up her face and bit down hard upon her lower lip. And there and then she made her decision. She would put on the greatest act of her life. She would pretend to believe him. She would pander to the woman just like Tony and his father did. Perhaps the way forward was not by confrontation, but by little acts of kindness that would slowly break down the barriers. It was worth a try. Anything was worth a try if she wanted to keep Tony’s love.

  And about that, there was no question.

  Kathy lifted her head and kissed him gently. His arms tightened around her and he returned her kiss with passion.

  For just a little while all thoughts of Beatrice Kendall were driven from both their minds.

  Eighteen

  Without any warning, Amy arrived to stay the weekend at the beginning of December.

  ‘I’ve brought you some butter and a few eggs and a chicken. Dad only killed it this morning so it’s quite fresh.’

  Jemima pounced on them as if they were gold dust. ‘How thoughtful of you. Kathy had to queue last week, just to get a couple of ounces of butter.’

  ‘Now, I don’t want to put you out, Aunt Jemima,’ Amy went on. ‘I can sleep with Kathy.’ The two girls hugged each other as Jemima answered, ‘You won’t put me out, my dear. I’m delighted to see you. How’s that brother of yours?’

  ‘Oh, Morry’s fine. You know Morry.’

  ‘Yes,’ Jemima murmured and suddenly her tone was wistful. ‘Yes, I know Maurice. He’s not going to do anything silly, is he? Like volunteering?’

  ‘Don’t think so,’ Amy grinned. ‘But I am.’

  ‘What d’you mean?’ Kathy and Jemima spoke together.

  ‘I’m going to join the Wrens. That’s why I’m here. I’m going to find the nearest recruiting office. There is one in Lincoln, isn’t there?’

  ‘I haven’t the faintest idea, but we can find out, I’ve no doubt.’ Jemima regarded her seriously. ‘But Amy, are you sure about this? I mean, wouldn’t you be better helping your father on the farm?’

  Amy laughed. ‘Dad doesn’t need me. He’s got Morry and he can apply for a deferment for him. Besides, all the old boys in the village are coming forward to help out. What about you, Kathy? Are you going to join up? You’d look cracking in uniform.’

  ‘I might if – if Tony’s called up. But I don’t want to before he has to leave.’

  ‘But I thought you told me that his mother will get him out of it?’

  Before Kathy could reply, Jemima put in, ‘She can try, but I doubt she’ll manage it. Being a manager in a store selling fripperies is hardly likely to be viewed as valuable war work.’

  Kathy leant forward to say in a loud whisper that was intended for Jemima to hear, ‘He made the unforgivable mistake of saying that a woman couldn’t do his job.’

  The two girls giggled and looked at Jemima, who wriggled her shoulders and declared, ‘Well, like I told him, I could do his job standing on my head.’

  The smile faded from Amy’s face as she murmured, ‘You might very well have to. Oh, not standing on your head, Auntie, but if this war goes on, you might very well have to step into his shoes.’

  At this and all that her remark implied, the three women fell silent.

  Despite the cloud hanging over everyone and the restrictions of the blackout, the two girls enjoyed a merry weekend together. Kathy was given Saturday off and they treated themselves to afternoon tea in Boots’ café and then to the cinema.

  ‘Aren’t you seeing Tony?’ Amy asked. ‘I don’t want to play gooseberry.’

  Kathy shook her head. ‘No. We thought it best for him to stay at home this weekend.’ She had told Amy all about her visit to the Kendalls’ house and the quarrel she’d had with Tony afterwards. It felt good to have a friend she could confide in. She hadn’t realized just how much she was missing Amy and their girlie chats. Impulsively, she reached out across the table and clutched Amy’s hand. ‘Oh, I do miss you so much. How is everyone at home? Your mum and dad and – and Morry?’

  ‘They’re fine.’ She squeezed Kathy’s hand as she added, ‘And Morry’s fine. Don’t you worry about him. He’s friendly with a girl in the village. Eve Jackson. Do you remember her?’

  ‘A pretty blonde girl.’

  ‘That’s the one.’

  ‘I’m so glad,’ Kathy heaved a sigh of relief. Somehow, she still felt responsible for Morry’s happiness – or rather for having made him unhappy by her refusal to marry him. If he was seeing someone else, then . . . But at Amy’s next words her hopes were dashed. ‘Of course, it’s not serious. Not on Morry’s part. There’s only one girl for him.’

  Kathy groaned. ‘Don’t, Amy. You make me feel awful.’

  Amy laughed. ‘Well, don’t, you silly goose. No one’s blaming you. Not even Morry. We all know – and Morry too if he’s honest – that it’s no good marrying him if you don’t love him.’

  There was silence between them until Kathy asked hesitantly, ‘Have you – have you heard how my mam is?’

  ‘She’s all right,’ Amy said gently. ‘Mum’s been across to see her and Dad keeps in touch with your father. I won’t say she’s “fine” but she is all right. He’s not hitting her, if that’s what’s worrying you. Mum asked her straight out and told her to come to our house if that happened.’

  ‘Thanks.’ Kathy’s gratitude was heartfelt. ‘And please thank your mum and dad for me. They’re the best. They really are. You’re so lucky, you and Morry.’

  ‘I know,’ Amy said simply. They were silent for a few moments before Amy said with a briskness that was very like Aunt Jemima’s. ‘Now, let’s go and find out where the nearest recruiting office is.’

  The days leading up to Christmas were the busiest Kathy had known since she had come to work at Hammonds.

  ‘You wouldn’t think they’d be wanting to buy hats, would you?’ she remarked to Stella as the two scuttled about the department, with scarcely a minute’s breather between serving customers.

  ‘Defiance, that’s what it is,’ the younger girl said with an astute flash of insight. ‘We’re showing that Hitler feller he can’t get us down. Oh, Kathy, just look at this hat! Isn’t it the prettiest you’ve ever seen?
’ She sighed. ‘I do wish I could afford it.’

  ‘Put it on your Christmas list.’

  ‘Huh!’ Stella’s mouth tightened in disgust. ‘And what good d’you think that’d be? Do you know what I’m getting for Christmas?’

  Kathy stared at her and shook her head.

  ‘War Bonds. That’s what my father’s present to me is.’

  Kathy found it hard to hide a wry smile. It was just the sort of thing her own father would have done. But she was saved from having to answer the girl, as three more customers arrived in the store at once.

  ‘What are you doing for Christmas, Kathy?’ Jemima asked a week before the day. ‘We’re lucky this year. With Christmas Day falling on a Monday, we’ll get three days off work. I shall go to Sandy Furze Farm as usual and Betty has invited you too. If you want to go, that is.’

  Kathy was torn. Once, she’d have liked nothing better than to spend Christmas enveloped in the warmth of the Robinson family. For years she’d lived out the cheerless austerity at home, longing to escape across the fields to her friend’s house. Some years she’d managed a visit on Boxing Day and the stark contrast between the homes had left her feeling even more dissatisfied with her own. But now there was Tony.

  ‘I’ll let you know tomorrow night. I’ll try to find out what Tony’s plans are.’

  Jemima looked sceptical but she said nothing. Privately, she hoped that for once the young man just might have the courage to stand up to his mother. She sighed. He was soon going to have to summon up another kind of bravery. She hoped he would be up to it.

  During her lunch break the next day, Kathy went to the manager’s office.

  ‘Go straight in, Miss Burton.’ Miss Foster smiled at her fondly.

  Kathy entered and closed the door behind her, leaning on it a moment to watch Tony working over a sheaf of papers. When he looked up, a smile lit up his face. He jumped up at once and came round the desk, his hands outstretched. They snatched a brief kiss, before Kathy launched into the reason for her visit to his office.