by Roz Savage
But do we search in vain? Has anybody, ever, convincingly claimed that they have found the meaning of life? Personally, I don’t believe that there is such a thing—by which I mean that there is no intrinsic meaning to our existence. However, I do most strongly and strenuously believe that it is essential to happiness that we imbue our time here on Earth with meaning. Life does not create the meaning for us. We have to define it for ourselves. Note that I said define, not find. In my view, we don’t find the meaning of life, any more than we find ourselves. We choose our beliefs about who we are and why we are here in order to reassure ourselves that we have significance, that we do not just get born, procreate (or not), and die.
It doesn’t even matter whether we think we have found the answer or not. It is the fact that we are searching that matters. It is the search itself that gives meaning to our lives, lends our existence a narrative arc, makes us feel that we are on a quest, a journey, a trajectory. Without that sense of life’s great adventure, it would be hard indeed to feel that life has meaning.
I saw my voyage across the Pacific as having three layers of significance. Superficially, it was an attempt to reach the other side. This was no doubt an intrepid and worthy endeavour, but to me it was the least important of the dimensions. To keep me motivated there had to be more to it than that.
The second layer was my environmental mission. Having belatedly discovered my environmental conscience, this was a powerful driving force. I passionately wanted to do all I could to spread the good green word.
Those two layers are external. But there had to be an internal driver as well. There may be some people in the world who can perform heroic feats out of pure altruism. I am not one of them. I needed to get something out of this too. And, in fact, I have got many, many things out of my experiences. I have felt part of something bigger than just myself and my trifling desires. I have been made happy by sharing my experiences with my blog readers, from office workers to stay-at-home parents, from the physically afflicted to enthusiastic athletes, from the environmentally passionate to the (hopefully no longer) environmentally oblivious. I have cherished the relationships that have developed along my way, across diverse cultures and backgrounds, in person and online.
Even though I strongly dislike exercise (yes, you can laugh, but it’s true), I enjoy the feeling at the end of a day’s rowing, of a challenging job well done, of having conquered my aversions and persevered when I wanted to give up. I am grateful for the way that the hardships of life at sea make me appreciate anew the comforts and conveniences of dry land that I previously took for granted. I love the sense of achievement that comes from trying new things—a new skill such as fixing a problem in the electrical system or exploring a new place. I relish having a clearly defined goal and working methodically towards it, knowing every day that I am getting a bit closer. I enjoy feeling resilient, mentally strong, and able to cope with whatever life and the ocean throw at me.
And most of all, it makes me happy to believe that my life has meaning. I do not have children, so my legacy was never going to be in the form of passing on my genes. I had to find a different way to touch lives, to make a difference, to feel that there was some point to being me. I have tried hard to be a good person and to leave the world a better place. To feel that I have in any small way succeeded is to me a prize beyond measure, the most wonderful wealth that I could ask for, a form of prosperity that I would wish for the whole world to experience and enjoy. This, surely, is the ultimate goal of our search for happiness and meaning.
ACKNOWLEDGMENTS
To all those who have helped me over the years and whom I have not thanked sufficiently, I would now like to make amends. I may not have shown it at the time, but as I row across the vast oceans, I look around my boat and see all the evidence of your love and support, and I feel you there with me. There have been times when I have doubted my own ability to continue, but when surrounded by the visible tokens of your commitment to my cause, I carry on—if not for me, then for you.
First and foremost, I would like to thank the stalwarts of Team Roz: Nicole Bilodeau, Ian Tuller, Aenor Sawyer, Doug Grandt, Jay Gosuico, Liz Fischer, Conrad Wade, Lee Bruce, Ricardo Diniz, and Rick Shema. And of course, my long-suffering but ever-wonderful mother, Rita Savage.
Over the course of the four years of my Pacific crossing, I spent more time in California than on any other piece of dry land and made many good friends in that beautiful state. For your time, kindness, wisdom, hospitality, advice, skills, and occasional money, I would like to thank Michael Klayko and all at Brocade, Marcus Eriksen and Anna Cummins of the 5 Gyres Institute, Angela Hey and John Mashey, Leo Laporte, Nova Lee, Carina Riordan and David Marsland at eBay, my friends at Google, Rich Crow, Bob Simmons and Kelly Luttrell, Karl Corey, Dr. Barbara Block, Bob and Meryl Selig, John Kay, Dennis Bonney, Gordy Nash, Ellen Leanse, Taylor Milsal, Jamis MacNiven, Richard and Barbara Pivnicka, JB Benna, Martha Kaufeldt, Karen Morss, Bill Chayes, Deb Dennis, Bebe Flynn, Steve Bein and the Adventurers Club of Los Angeles, Joni Harlem, Nancy Glenn, Elena Zhukova and Aleksey Bochkovsky, Sharon Levin, Josh Jenson, Lenny Lieberman, Phil Keoghan, Doug Woodring, Carol Mone and Roger Choplin, Ed Osgood, Steve Nelson, John Dawson, Dawn Pasinski, Minette Siegel, Roger Barnett and all at Shaklee, Joslyn Podesto, Connie Cook, Betsy Rosenberg, Chris Lynch, Mike Korchinsky, Niland Mortimer, David and Maureen Wilmot, Michael Sutton, David Helvarg and Blue Frontier Campaign, Eva Boris, David Faivus, Robert Kibble, John and Sarah De Heras, Melinda Griffith, Jean-Michel Cousteau, Paul Nordquist, Diane Davis, Reuben Hechanova, Kristian Ruggieri, Shana Bagley, Mark Tishler, Douglas Lubes, Mark Featherstone, Nancy Scurka, Inka Petersen, Rob Rosen and all at Remote Satellite Systems, my friends at the San Francisco Ocean Film Festival, Captain Stephen Baxter and the rest of the U.S. Coast Guard crew at Humboldt.
I also spent several months enjoying Hawai’ian hospitality and feel fortunate to have met many wonderful people there: Henk Rogers and Blue Planet Foundation, Bobbie Jennings and all at the Waikiki Yacht Club, Jeff Apaka, Andy Bumatai, Liz Jackson, Ray Hollowell, “Scuba” Drew Wheeler, Barry Pickering, Mike Marsh, Cindy Hunter, Barry Pickering and the rest of the Blue Lady crew, Tom Pohaku Stone, Ryan Ozawa and Burt Lum of Bytemarks, Mike Rush, Gary Brookins, Liz Jackson, Albert and Elise Yellin, Evan Rapoport, Brian Dote, Traci and Hunter Downs and all at Archinoetics, Joel Paschal and Sea of Change, Scott Burgess, Marlene Depierre, Mariya Gold, Kevin Seid, Morgan Kavanaugh, Stuart Coleman, Stuart Scott, Phil Uhl, Blackie and all at Pacific Shipyards.
Elsewhere in the U.S. and Canada I made some very special friends, including Eric Sanford, Michelle Slade, John and Claire Reid, Bob and Jamie Craft, Jon Stryker and Slo Randjelovic, Kathleen Frith and the women of Pleiades, Daniel and Joanna Rose, Kerri Kolen, Jim Paulson, Tim Harincar, Joan Sherwood, Bill Spinks, Richard Cort, Tom Hernon, Lori Burken and Bottomsiders, Roxana Lopez and Wilderness Family Naturals, Sarah McDowell and Lärabar, David Saunders, Ann Luskey, Laurin Ensslin, Martin Tryon, Paul Minshall, Mark Einreinhof, Suzy Mack, John Herrick, Jim Salzman, Vic Jones, Laurey Masterton, Cindy Dover, Deb and Michael Follo, Stan Miller, Bob Pavia, Doug DeMark, Susan Bartlett, Roger Friesen, Kevin Doheny and Margo Pellegrino. I would also like to pay tribute to Timothy Ray, a promising young man who was a third-year doctoral student at Scripps Institution of Oceanography when he organized a speaking engagement there for me in 2010. Tragically, Tim died suddenly and unexpectedly in May 2011, leaving as his legacy our memories of his passion for, and commitment to, the oceans.
Thank you to my wonderful friends in Kiribati for taking such good care of me and my boat: David and Tessie Lambourne, John and Linda Anderson, President Anote Tong, Captain Superintendent Boro Lucic and all the cadets of the Marine Training Centre.
Amongst the many kind people I met in Papua New Guinea, several went above and beyond to help a solitary stranger from the other side of the world. Thanks especially to Sir Peter Barter, Jan and Eunie Messersmith, Lachlan Monsbourgh, Richard Coleman, Ma
rtin and Shirley Tsang, and Sir Arnold Amet.
Although I spent only a few precious weeks in my home country during the Pacific years, I am grateful to my friends there for not forgetting or forsaking me. Special thanks to Alan Murray, Anthony Swift, Alun Rees, Shane Winser and the Royal Geographical Society, Sue Losson, Charlotte Voehtz and Green People, Steve and Jane Shorney, Polly Higgins, Misty Oldland, Catt McLeod, Rodney Byram, Sam and Ella Allpass. Also to my magnificent team for the hike from Big Ben to Brussels en route to Copenhagen: Jane Hornsby, Laura Hazell, Alison Gannett, Mary Kadzielski, Nora McDevitt, and our European supporters Baldwin and Aey Hopmans, Yves Mathieu, and Frank Koelewijn. Thanks also to Søren and Rikke Gaard for inviting a stranger into their home for the duration of the COP15 conference.
Amongst my many friends in the conservation/environmental world, I’d like to particularly thank three wonderful people who have been great role models to me: Bill McKibben at 350.org, Dr. Sylvia Earle at Mission Blue, and Cynthia Gaik Suan at LEAP. Also Dianna Cohen and Daniella Russo and the rest of the team at the Plastic Pollution Coalition, Stiv Wilson at 5 Gyres, Conrad Humphreys and Teresa Page at the Blue Project, and Shaw Thacher.
And thank you to the authors whose books transported me from my tiny rowboat into other worlds via their audiobook versions, particularly: Kim Stanley Robinson, Jacqueline Winspear, Alexander McCall Smith, Diana Gabaldon, Richard Russo, and George R. R. Martin.
My heartfelt thanks to those who helped this book to see the light of day: my indefatigable agent Taryn Fagerness, the wonderful folks at Hay House in both the UK and U.S., and my editor Jessica Kelley.
Although we hadn’t yet met (in this lifetime, anyway) during the Pacific years, this list of acknowledgments would not be complete without a mention of my beloved soul mate, Howard, who supported and encouraged me during the writing of this book. Thank you for the happiness and meaning—and the love and laughter—you have brought into my life.
And finally, my endless gratitude to all the thousands of people who have read my blog over the years. Thank you for your time, your caring, your support, and your kind messages of encouragement in bad times and good. Possibly I could have done it without you, but it wouldn’t have meant anywhere near as much. I hope I have made, and will continue to make, you proud.
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Roz Savage, Member of the Order of the British Empire, is a British ocean rower, environmental campaigner, author, and speaker. She holds four world records for ocean rowing, including first woman to row solo across the Atlantic, Pacific, and Indian Oceans. She has rowed more than 15,000 miles, taken around five million oar strokes, and spent cumulatively more than 500 days of her life at sea in a 23-foot rowboat. Her first book, Rowing the Atlantic: Lessons Learned on the Open Ocean, was published in 2009. She is a United Nations Climate Hero, a fellow of the Royal Geographical Society, a fellow of the Explorers Club of New York, and has been listed among the Top 20 Great British Adventurers by The Telegraph. She was named a 2011 Adventurer of the Year by National Geographic; and in 2012, she became a Yale World Fellow.
Website: www.rozsavage.com
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