by Tefft, Cyndi
“I don’t know how long I stayed there. Time is not the same there as it is on earth, you remember? Since you cast the sun and the moon, it can be any time of day for as long as you want. So one day can feel like a thousand years or just an instant.” I nodded, remembering that magical place. “So I don’t know how long it was, but it certainly felt more like a thousand years that I stayed here in this cabin, raging like a lunatic and weeping like a child.” He gave me a half-smile and I pulled him tightly to me, kissing his temple and stroking his hair.
“And then the most wonderful and horrible thing happened. An angel of the Lord appeared before me, blazing bright like white fire, filling me with the greatest sense of peace and joy that I’ve ever known. He said, ‘Greetings, Aiden Alexander MacKenzie MacRae. God is pleased with you and has opened the way of heaven to you. Come with me.’ But at that very moment, I heard your voice in my head, screaming. You said, ‘Aiden, where are you? Oh please, Aiden, don’t leave me!’”
“You could hear me?” I stared at him in shock.
“Aye, I heard you, every thought that you sent me. And every word was like a drop of water to a man dying of thirst. It kept me alive and I ached to hear your sweet voice again, but hearing your pain, your agony, and being powerless to help you… It was the worst torture I could possibly imagine.”
“I’m sorry, I didn’t think you could hear me. I only did it because it made me feel closer to you, to hold on. I never meant to hurt you.”
“Ah love, don’t be sorry.” He brushed a curl off my cheek and smiled softly at me. “You don’t know what it meant to me, to hear your voice, to know you were thinking of me. I only wish you could have heard me, too. But I know you didn’t because of the thoughts you sent me. If only you could’ve heard how much I love you, and how I missed you, too.” He stroked my hair and kissed me again, his lips soft and warm against mine.
“So you didn’t go to heaven, then, because of me?” My chest was leaden with guilt but he smiled at me, understanding clear in his eyes.
“Oui, c’est vrai, ma chèrie. But you should not feel bad. I made it worse, no doubt, by casting memories of our time together. I listened to your sweet voice in my head while I watched us make love on the sand… your beautiful body… No, I couldn’t leave you. Not even for heaven.”
As he spoke, he ran his hand over my neck to my breast. My nipple stood stiff in the cool night air, pressed against my nightgown. His thumb circled it and a shiver passed down my spine, my flesh recalling the wonder of his touch. His mouth sought mine and I lost myself in his kiss, his hands roaming over my body like they were memorizing every curve once again.
When we broke away, he frowned down at me. “You’re skinnier than I remember. You’ve not been eating well.”
I barked a joyless laugh. “Yeah, grief will do that to you.”
My words hung in the air between us like the smoke. Part of me wanted to take it back because I could see that it stung him, but part of me needed him to know that I’d been in just as much pain.
I’m sorry, love. I know that I promised you I’d never leave.
My blood froze as his words formed in my head and I gaped at him, my mind struggling to figure out why I could hear his thoughts again. I held his face in my hands, trembling with emotion, and sent the message back.
You never did leave me, Aiden. You were always with me.
He crushed me against his chest and we both cried, overcome with relief at our reunion and grieving for the pain that the other had endured during our separation. “But how?” I asked. “I still don’t understand. How can you be here now?”
To my surprise, his face split into a huge grin. “Oh lassie, I prayed and prayed. Oh, how I prayed to be with you again, but I didn’t know how it could be, since I didn’t want you to have to die again to be with me. But God is a marvelous and merciful wonder, I tell you the truth. I heard your cry there at the end and I knew you were in danger. I was worried out of my mind and I called out to God in agony to please spare you, even though I knew it meant we couldn’t be together.
“Instantly, the angel reappeared before me, his peace and beauty washing over me like a river. He said, ‘God has heard your prayers and has granted you new life. Go to her, Aiden. You are free.’ And there I was, in the center of the room filled with smoke, with your limp body at my feet. I was worried at first, for you weren’t breathing, but when you turned to look at me and called my name… I thought my heart would burst in my very chest.” He shook his head in awe, his face beaming with joy.
“Thank you, God.” My heart rejoiced as I breathed the prayer and Aiden squeezed my hand.
“Amen!” His voice was loud in the stillness of the dark night, but I didn’t care. I wanted to shout it from the mountaintops, I was so elated with the sheer wonder of it all. I hugged him close and laughed, the grief and pain of the last six months dissipating like the smoke in the air around us. Finally whole once again, I wanted to stay in that moment forever.
He kissed me then, his lips reacquainting themselves with mine and his hands wound in my hair, his fingertips circling my temples and massaging my scalp. His mouth moved to my ear and jaw and the tingling sensation I remembered from his touch echoed all throughout my flesh.
“Mmmm…” I purred and closed my eyes, reeling in the sensation of his hot breath on my neck. He stopped and hooked a finger through my necklace, pulling it forward so that the charm and the ring rested in his palm. He stared at it for a moment, surprised, but then he smiled.
“Ah, I’d forgotten that you told me about the ring. When I heard your voice in my head, I couldn’t believe it was true, but sure enough, it was gone from my sporran. I’m so glad you had it.” His eyes sparkled as he unhooked the necklace and removed the ring from the chain. “But it doesn’t belong on your neck, my bride.”
I held out my hand and he slipped the ring on my finger, closing his hand around my own and holding it to his chest just as he’d done the first time.
“I think it’s probably safe to go inside again. I don’t want you to catch a chill.” He kissed me lightly and tucked a strand of hair behind my ear. He lifted me off his lap and stood up, then gathered me in his arms and carried me across the threshold.
Chapter 36
A thin film of smoke lingered in the air, but the cross breeze had ventilated the cabin so that only a lightly acrid scent remained, clinging to the furniture and draperies. He set me on my feet at the base of the skinny stairwell and I pulled him up the stairs behind me, my heart hammering in my chest. A sudden wave of nervousness swept through me at the thought of being intimate with him again.
While we were apart, I’d spent a great deal of time reminiscing about the times that we’d made love, the longing for him so intense I thought it would break me. But the details had become somewhat blurry over the remainder of the school year and my memories were more like snapshots frozen in my mind. I could only clearly remember a specific look here and expression there, along with the beautiful lines of his muscled body.
Yet there was nothing blurry or frozen about him now as he stood before me next to the bed, his face glowing with the moonlight. He was very much alive and his chest was firm and warm under my hands. My stomach clenched as I envisioned his naked body against mine and I coughed to cover up my irrational anxiety. He glanced to the side, taking in my blankets and pillow on the twin sized bed under the eave, and raised one eyebrow as he stooped to remove his boots.
“I couldn’t sleep on our bed without you,” I explained, my voice barely more than a whisper.
“Ah, ma chérie…” He put one arm around my waist and pulled me close. “You’re trembling. Are you cold? Or… maybe scairt?”
I shouldn’t have been surprised at his observation since he could read me like an open book, but I was. I dropped my eyes to the floor and nodded slightly, feeling like an idiot. He lifted my chin with one finger until I was forced to meet his gaze.
“I understand, Lindsey. Truly, I do. Bu
t you’ve naught to fear from me. I would wait a thousand years for you, more if I had to. We don’t have to do anything tonight if you’re not ready. I am content just to be with you.”
My lip quivered and he put both arms around me, holding me close to his chest. “No more tears, love. I think we’ve both shed more than our fair share and there isn’t any need for it now. Come, let us just get some rest, aye?” But his compassion emboldened me and I shook my head, squaring my shoulders and taking a deep breath.
Do it now, before you lose your nerve. I told myself, straightening up as I stepped back from him, my face set.
“No,” I whispered and pulled my nightgown up over my head in one swift motion, dropping it to the floor at my feet. A breeze was blowing through the room from the open window and I stood before him in only my panties, shivering with the chill and nerves, the silver charm on my necklace dangling between my breasts. I’d never felt more vulnerable and exposed in my life, but I trusted him implicitly and for some reason, I desperately needed him to know it.
His gaze swept over my body, his face wordlessly asking if I was sure. He took a step toward me and reached out, cupping my breast with one hand. His natural body heat was like a brand on my ice-cold skin and I twitched involuntarily when he touched me.
“Gracious, you’re freezing.” He stopped, concerned, but I took his hand and placed it over my heart, which was thumping like a bass drum. Conflicting emotions played across his face.
“What do I do about you, lass? You stand before me here in the moonlight, your skin the palest ivory, shaking with cold and fear.” I started to protest and he silenced me. “I can see it in your eyes. Don’t lie to me.” He gathered his thoughts for a moment and continued, his warm hands wandering over my skin.
“And part of me wants to gather you in my arms like a wee child, to protect you and keep you safe and warm. At the same time, your body is so beautiful that I want to make fierce love to you until you cry out underneath me. Honest to God, Lindsey, I want to own you, to possess you, to make my claim on you so there’s never any question that you belong to me and me alone.” His eyes burned with a primitive lust and his jaw clenched as he grabbed my hips firmly with his hands.
“And yet, the truth remains that the very breath in my lungs is because of you, mon coeur. And I know very well that I wouldn’t be here now if it weren’t for your love.” His eyes locked onto mine, his voice steady and strong in the still room. “So as much as I want to make you my own, I'm the one who’s bound to you. I belong to you, Lindsey MacRae, body, mind and soul. I am yours, if you’ll have me.” My heart pounded against my ribs so hard I could hardly breathe. I closed my eyes and spoke to him in my mind.
Make love to me, Aiden.
He swept me up easily in his strong arms and placed me gently on the bed. He undressed quickly and covered my body with his own. The warmth of his skin spread through me like a wildfire as he kissed me.
It’s Aiden, here with me, at last. I told myself, hardly able to believe such a miracle had occurred, and the excitement grew in my chest, igniting the passion within me. I stroked his body and kissed him madly, abandoning any trepidation in my joy at being with him again. The movement of our bodies was not fluid and graceful, but filled with desperation and desire, pain and loss, need and lust. We consumed one another until the chasm that had separated us was forgotten and we could lie in each other’s arms, completely exhausted and finally fulfilled.
Chapter 37
In the morning, I stirred and blinked sleepily, but then smiled, seeing Aiden lying on his back asleep next to me. I’d never awakened to find him sleeping, and his peaceful face completely mesmerized me. His eyelashes were darker at the roots and blond at the tips, his nose straight and strong, his lips slightly parted as he slept. I watched the rhythmic rise and fall of his chest and could not keep from grinning. I was sticky and sore, and I smelled like a chimney, but I’d never been happier in my life. I started to hum a tune without even realizing it, and he woke up, smiling dreamily as he turned to me.
“Madainn mhath, mo leannan. That means ‘Good morning, my lover’ in Gaelic.”
I grinned at him and traced his bottom lip with my finger. “How do you say, ‘You were amazing last night’ in Gaelic?” He laughed heartily and provided the incredibly long and difficult translation for me, to which I just shrugged and replied, “Peut être, je devrais rester avec le français.”
He chuckled and smoothed my hair. “Oui, d’accord. Maybe it would be best to learn one new language at a time. I’m happy to teach you both, though if you’d like. We have plenty of time now.” I traced the line of muscle in his bicep to his forearm and he chuckled to himself, a private smile flickering on his face. I raised an eyebrow in question, wondering what he was thinking.
“I just realized that I’ve need of the privy and I haven’t felt that sensation in… well, three hundred years.”
I took him downstairs to the bathroom and explained the workings of the toilet. He was fascinated by the ‘marvelous contraption,’ which made me giggle. We took a shower together after he’d relieved himself and took turns washing one another. Aiden’s gaze lingered on the scars on my arm and on the side of my breast and I explained that they were from the car accident.
“One of my broken ribs pierced a lung when the car crushed me. The lung collapsed so that I couldn’t really breathe and the doctors put a tube in right there,” I pointed to my side, “to save my life. The one on my arm is from the broken glass of the window, I think.”
“I’m sorry, love,” he said as he traced the scars with his finger.
“Don’t be. I wouldn’t have you if I didn’t have those. You were definitely worth it.” I kissed him briefly and turned off the water, then dried off with a towel and handed one to him. I put on my bathrobe and headed into the kitchen to start breakfast while he went upstairs to get dressed.
I was cheerfully dicing potatoes while the butter melted in the cast iron skillet when he came downstairs. Alison Krauss was singing “Now That I’ve Found You” on the stereo and I joined in when I felt his arms around my waist. Turning in his embrace, I smiled up at him, hardly able to believe he was here with me again. We swayed back and forth to the music in the little kitchen.
“Taties and eggs sound okay for breakfast?” I asked and he broke into a grin.
“Aye, my love. I can’t think of anything else I’d like more,” he said, then brought his lips to mine.
About the author
Cyndi Tefft lives with her family in the Pacific Northwest where the weather is overcast and rainy, much like the Highlands of Scotland. So she was right at home when she got the chance to visit Eilean Donan Castle in May 2010. A self-proclaimed Scot freak, she loved every bit about the trip to Scotland: the people, the kilts, the accents, the fish & chips, the haggis… well okay, not the haggis.
Connect with the author online at
http://www.cynditefft.com
Don't miss the exciting sequel to BETWEEN, coming soon!
HELL TRANSPORTER
Aiden MacRae has been given new life after being stuck transporting souls to heaven for the last three hundred years. He doesn't know the culture, the times or the slang, but there is one thing he does know: he didn't come forward alone.
The master of hell has other plans for the Scottish Highlander and has sent a transporter of his own to get the deed done. Will Lindsey be able to save him or get caught in the crossfire?
