“I wonder what time Tom is starting the BBQ?” Cooper asks, trying to get away from the women.
“I think Meghan needed him for something. They should be down soon.” I grab Cooper’s beer, pulling a sip from it. He laughs while he wraps his arms around my waist, making me fall back onto him. Just then Tom comes out with the biggest smirk ever.
“Hey, Parker, how long was that?” He stands back proudly.
“Ummm, a minute and a half, my friend,” I say to him with a huge smile on my face.
He glares over at me. “Minute and a half my ass. You are looking at a good five minutes.”
He is smiling like he just won the Stanley Cup. “Okay, big guy, why don’t you grill us up some food? Those boys played their ass off and need some sustenance,” Cooper calls out over my head. The boys hear this, yelling out how hungry they are.
“Momma, Momma, come swimming with me.” Allison is now standing next to our chair, dripping all over the place.
“Okay, love, let’s go swimming.” I get off Cooper, making my way to the pool, and strip off my sundress. Once my dress is placed on a chair, Allison turns around to see Sam and Michael.
“Look at me and my mommy. We match.”
Sam stutters, “Umm, yes, you both look beautiful.”
“They are both beautiful indeed,” I hear from my left, and I’m shocked because there stands James. Without Tiffany.
“Daddy, you came to Matthew’s party. Matthew, Dad’s here.”
At this point everyone stops talking. It’s like the parting of the sea or something.
Three things happen all at once. Matthew looks over with a wave and continues talking to his friends.
Meghan comes outside, looking freshly fucked, I might add, almost spilling our drinks, and Cooper is standing right behind me now with one hand on my hip.
“James, good to see you. Babe, let’s go swim, yeah?”
I’m in a daze. Why is he here? He never ever comes to these things. Actually, him coming to one before was like pulling teeth. He usually came up with excuses to never come to anything.
“Parker,” Cooper says, snapping me back to reality. “It’s fine.”
“What is he doing here?” I whisper. “He was never here, now he’s here all the time.”
“It’s all good, he’s here for Matthew. Let him have this.”
I scoff at him, rolling my eyes.
Meghan finally sits down on the side of the pool, putting her feet in the water, holding out a drink for me. “I think you need a double, but I didn’t know before I came outside.”
“I think I need a triple, not just a double,” I say, swallowing down half of my martini in one gulp.
“Babe, we have plans later, yeah? So go easy.”
“Oh, plans, is that what we are calling it?” Meghan asks, sipping her own martini. “I just had plans upstairs. Five minutes long. Tom was proving a point because your woman called him a two-minute man.”
Cooper just shakes his head, not even trying to get her brand of crazy. He simply accepts it.
“I see your plans made a mess of your hair, by the way. Looks like it was pulled and yanked.” I throw at her.
“Oh, that’s because it was. My plan was very aggressive this time. There was even a smack.”
That is the line that makes Cooper choke on his sip of beer.
“I can’t do this.” He leans down, making sure to kiss me before stepping out of the pool.
“Oh wait, don’t leave yet, Cooper. I was just going to tell you about my plans later tonight. I plan on making lots of plans.”
I splash water at her face, but she doesn’t even notice because she is now belly rolling laughing, making me see that everything is going to be okay.
When I finally make my way out of the pool, way before Allison is ready, I spot James sitting next to my bag. “It’s nice of you to come for Matthew,” I say, trying to not make a big deal out of it. “It was a big day for him. I know he is going to enjoy you coming out for him.” I wrap myself up in the towel before sitting by his side on another wicker chair.
“We had it good, didn’t we?” James looks over at me, smiling.
“Yes, we did, but if I’m honest, I don’t think we would have survived the forever.” I don’t know why I’m saying this.
“What do you mean?” he asks, his eyebrows pulling together.
“I mean, we loved each other, but we were not in love with each other anymore. I think it was all just routine. Us staying together was the right thing to do, but it wasn’t because we needed to, it was because we just didn’t know how to walk away.”
“This is about Cooper, isn’t it?”
I shake my head. “I don’t know if it is or if it isn’t, but what I do know is that with him it’s different. I don’t have to be scared he is going to get pissed off about something, because he’s just accepting to things.”
“What if I said I made a mistake?” he asks, looking straight in my eyes.
“I’d say that if you had asked me four months ago, I would have said that I don’t know what I would have said, but we are here now. So did you make a mistake? Fuck yeah, you did. You broke my heart, you ruined my life at the time. You made me doubt myself. You made me doubt everything that we created,” I say, taking in a deep breath. “But it also made me see that if you really wanted me you would have fought for me. You would have told me shit was going bad. It doesn’t happen overnight.”
“You’re right. I wasn’t happy, but you, you were the best thing to happen to me. Those kids are the reason for me to wake up every morning. I just lost my way.” He leans forward to hold my hands.
“You did lose your way, but I found my way. I’m happy, so very happy. I have my life, I have the kids, and now I have Cooper. I have to say I wasn’t expecting it, I wasn’t waiting for it, but it showed up and knocked me on my ass.”
“I think I’m just going to tell Matthew goodbye and catch up another time.” He gets up. “I’m hoping we could talk more.” He kisses my forehead. “I miss you, I miss us.”
And just like that he is gone, saying goodbye to everyone before stopping to kiss Matthew and Allison.
“Babe,” Cooper calls, sitting where James had been a moment earlier.
“I’m happy.” I look at him, smiling, hoping he gets what I’m saying.
“Good to know. I’m happy, too.” He tugs my hands till I’m sitting in his lap, wrapping my arms around his neck, kissing him through my smile. “We are both happy.”
Chapter Eighteen
We pull up to the house way after everyone’s bedtime. Allison was asleep even before we pulled out of Meghan’s driveway. It’s been a long time I’ve felt this content.
I look over at Cooper, who looks far away in his thoughts.
He’s been like that all evening.
Once we get home, he quickly takes Allison out of her seat. Luckily, she changed into her pajamas before we left Meghan’s.
“I got her, babe, get the bags.”
Matthew is continuing his ‘celebrating’ by staying over at his friend’s house. Usually I would say no, but like Cooper said, it’s like he just won the cup.
“Okay.”
By the time I get inside and sort through all the wet things, I sense him before I feel him wrap his hands around my waist.
“Babe, come outside with me.” Something in his voice makes my heart pound. My hands are getting clammy just walking outside with him.
We get to the hammock, and he sits down on it, making it like a swing. His feet are on the ground in front, and the back of the hammock against his back halfway. “Sit on me,” he demands.
“I can’t. I’m going to throw you over.” I stand here in front of him. He rubs his hands up and down the back of my legs, kissing my stomach. I’m still wearing my sundress from this afternoon.
“I won’t make you fall, I promise.”
I comb my fingers through his hair, looking down into his blue eyes. They’re like the key to
his soul, always bright. Tonight they look clouded, like a storm is brewing.
“Okay,” I whisper and straddle his lap. I’m surprised we don’t topple over, but Cooper has his feet planted on the ground, so we aren’t going anywhere.
“Baby.” I look at him. “You’re scaring me.” I’m sure he can hear my heart beating in my chest.
“I’ve never felt like this.” he whispers, “I’ve had women, many women, but none were like you.” He kisses my chest right above my breast.
“Okay.” I twirl his hair through my fingers.
“When I looked over at you today and saw you sitting with James, my breath caught in my throat.”
“Honey.” I pull his hair so he looks up at me. “James and I, we are the past. Way, way in the past.”
“You made a life with him, you made a home with him, you have kids with him.” His voice trembles.
“I had all that, I made a home with him. I had kids with him. He threw that away. He tossed it aside.” I’m trying to calm my nerves. I’m scared that this is it. This will be the last time that I hold him. “Cooper.” He looks up at me, and I snap, my heart snaps. “No, you don’t get to decide this, you don’t get to toss me aside because you think you know what I want or need.” My heart is literally hurting. It’s aching. I blink away the tears that are forming in my eyes, continuing what I have to say. “If you don’t want me, just say it, but don’t you dare try to cop out of this giving yourself a clear conscience.” I drop my hands to my sides, looking into his eyes. I lean forward, kissing his eyes. “I’ve had many years with a man who not only looked through me, he passed by me, not stopping to look at me. But you, you see me.”—I kiss his cheeks—“I’ve had many years not smiling. Now I smile so much my cheeks hurt. I smile for no reason at all. I smile at you and because of you”—I kiss his lips—“I’ve had many years of little kisses, but none of them made my heart flutter like yours, none of them left me breathless because of them, none of them I longed for.” I can’t stop the one tear that has rolled down my face. “I want you, I want this”—I point from him to me with my hand—“I want this more than I care to admit”—I put my forehead on his, our eyes watching each other—“I want you to want me,” I whisper the last part, my heart hoping that he does pick me, that he picks us.
“I want you,” he says softly. “I want all of you. I want your mornings. I want your afternoons. I want your nights. I want your tomorrows, baby. I want it all. I was so scared you would want what you had and not want what we have.”
I don’t say anything anymore. I just lean in, kissing his bottom lip, hoping he opens up for me, and he does. He opens so our tongues touch each other, and I know I’m home.
I want to get under his skin, and it still wouldn’t be close enough. I fumble with his shirt, trying to rip it off his body. When my hands touch his chest, I make little traces of imaginary infinity signs all down his chest, hoping he feels it. He pulls down the tube part of my dress, bringing my bikini top with it. My nipples peak with the cold air on them. Cooper’s thumbs circle around my nipples, then he places his finger in the middle of my chest, making an infinity sign, all while looking into my eyes.
My need for him is all-consuming. He squeezes my breast, rubbing down to my ass. When both his hands cup my ass, he just palms it, pushing me more to him.
“Honey.” I’m stopped by his tongue invading my mouth. I’m invaded by his scent. His hand makes its way under my dress, moving my bikini bottoms to the side.
He enters me easily with two fingers, making me gasp. “Always ready for me, always.” With my head tossed back, he kisses down my neck with his tongue all the way to my nipple.
He takes it into his mouth, sucking deeply, sending shock waves down to my core. “Honey, please.” I look down at him. “Be with me.”
He withdraws his fingers from me, then opens his shorts, freeing himself.
“Be with me, baby.” I lift myself till I’m positioned over him where I slowly slide all the way down, one inch at a time. I feel him stretching me open while he invades me.
I look into his eyes, hoping he sees what I feel. I move up and down again, all the while looking at him. He’s beautiful. He’s everything I’ve ever dreamed of, and he’s mine.
He picks me up by my hips, bringing me to the top of his dick before bringing me down again.
“Honey.”
He lifts his feet off the ground, making us swing back and forth, putting him deeper into me. It’s like we are on a swing, so I push back, making him go back, him pushing forward, both of us wanting to go deeper and deeper. I’m close, so close. I know he is too because I feel fuller.
“Honey, I want you with me.”
“Babe, I’m there.” He grabs both my shoulders, thrusting down on him when I come apart. I squeeze him, taking him with me. He is groaning out his release, all the while we look into each other’s eyes. His blue eyes are clearer than before, more at peace, more calm. He kisses me deeply while still in me, the aftershocks of my orgasm still squeezing him.
“Stay with me tonight?” I ask him.
“What about Allison?” he asks, knowing that I never want to cross that line.
“It’s okay. We can set an alarm, wake up together. Say yes, please.”
“As long as I’m with you, it’s yes, it’s always yes.”
“Let’s go shower. We can even talk about the fact we didn’t use a condom.”
“I’m clean. I had my last physical before coming out here. Are you on birth control?”
I look at him. “I’m on an IUD, even though I haven’t been with anyone since James. I’m clean also.”
“So we do this without condoms from here on out. You okay with that?”
I laugh at him. “A little too late to ask that now, with you all in me.”
“Glad we got that settled.”
He gets up with me still attached to him, then locks the door, creeping all the way to my room where he shuts the door and showers with me.
Chapter Nineteen
“What the fuck is that?” I look up from my desk to see a furious Cooper all sweaty from his workout. He is talking about the huge bouquet of roses sitting on my desk. I know where his thoughts are going, but he is very, very wrong.
“Hello, Cooper,” I say sarcastically. “What has got your panties all in a twist today?”
He makes his way over to my desk, squeezing the shit out of the water bottle in his right hand. When he gets to the desk, he looks for a card in the middle of the arrangement. When he finally snatches it, he opens and reads it, then I see his face turn white. Before he says anything, I beat him to it.
“Feel better now that you know they are from my dad?” I say, looking at him with a full smile on my face.
“It’s your birthday?” he whispers, still looking at the card.
“It is. My dad always sends me flowers. I think he does it because he knows how much I fucking loathe them.” I sit back in my chair, gasping when his eyes finally meet mine. They’re cloudy blue, like he’s going through a war. I’m just not sure if he’s going through it with me in mind or something else.
“Parker, what the fuck?” he hisses at me.
I am at a loss for words. I don’t really understand what is going on. He must see the confusion on my face because in a matter of seconds he tells me exactly why he’s upset. Okay, upset is a soft word, he’s fucking pissed.
“Parker, did we not wake up together this morning? Did I not fuck you this morning in the kitchen before you had your coffee? Did you not scream out my name? Did you not think it would be something you share with me that today is your fucking birthday?”
I always read about the vein in the forehead pulsing out, but I’ve never really had a chance to see it. Except now, that is.
“Are you really mad because I didn’t tell you it was my birthday? Surely this is not happening right now,” I say in surprise.
“No, you’re wrong. I’m not mad, I’m fucking pissed. How could you n
ot tell me that today is your birthday? Did it not occur to you that maybe I would want to do something special for you? Did it not occur to you that maybe I should have known?”
“I didn’t want to make a big deal about it,” I mumble. I really wanted to forget about today altogether. Yes, birthdays should rock, but when you’re older than the guy you’re dating you don’t really like to focus on it. I mean, he’s thirty. Fucking thirty. I’m five years older than him. That is big. Maybe not too many, but to me it’s fucking huge.
“Why?”
I can feel his stare on me. I know he sees right through me. I’m a really confident person. I’m happy in my skin. I love myself, but when you think about all the young twenty something women throwing themselves at him, who would keep track of their birthday?
“I just don’t want to think about it.”
“What did you do last year?” He’s fishing. I know this, he knows this.
“Um, we had a huge party at Meghan and Tom’s.” I look down at my hands, pretending to pick a piece of invisible lint off my leg.
“The year before that?”
“We had family day at the rink. Rented some inflatables, BBQ in the parking lot. Kids skating on the ice.”
“So what’s the secret with this year? Why isn’t there anything planned?”
“I didn’t want anything. I wanted to just forget it.”
“Bullshit. Babe, you’re going to give me a reason or I’ll just have to think of something.”
“I didn’t want anything, okay?” My voice gets louder. “I don’t really want to celebrate this year. So I told everyone that we are to do nothing.”
“Change of plans. Dinner tonight. I’ll call Tom and Meghan then pack a bag. We are going away on Thursday.”
I open my mouth to say something, anything, but I’m cut off.
“And if you think you’re going to give me any shit, I’ll smack your ass so hard, you won’t sit for a week, we clear?” He has now rounded my desk, leaning back on it, pulling me into his arms, tilting my head up before kissing my nose.
Something So Right Page 11
