They look to each other again, shrug their shoulders and then move in for a group hug. I’m fairly sure that they will have known the basics anyway and all they’re doing is what they need to do, check I’m still in one piece. “Thanks,” I whisper, “I love you all and I need you to help me find... well, me.”
“Sounds like an intriguing project, but not as intriguing as the man mountain thing,” chuckles Neely.
“Exactly, let’s do this,” agrees Dolly.
“Oh boy,” is all Flo can contribute.
Moving through the house we delve into cupboards, closets and drawers until I feel utterly exhausted because we’ve made epic progress. I’ve purposely left my mom and dad’s bedroom and his office for another day, in real terms I’ve been braver than I ever expected to be so far and I’m proud of myself. I’ve chosen to see this as a cathartic new beginning rather than something sad and tragic.
“So, will the new Lottie still visit old Charlotte places... like Purps? I’m thinking hair blown out wide, long legs out and cheeky dancing until we drop,” says Neely grinning.
“I think she can manage that, although I’d prefer it if it was just as a girls night.”
“I can do just girls, Jonas can have a night with his girls,” declares Dolly.
“How about we all get ready at yours Lottie and then head on out together, like old times?” I love that idea and tell them I’ll see them at mine later.
A few hours later, after I’ve popped the cork on a bottle of white wine and had a relaxing soak in the tub, I find myself stood in front of my extensive wardrobe. I know the clothes I would normally select, but tonight they feel inadequate, my whole body is buzzing with the desire to choose something different. I feel compelled to select something that will bring the new Lottie out and into the world.
Decision made, free myself of my enforced reputation and make the mother of all statements.
I slide my clothes along the rail until I get to the outfits that lurk in the extreme ends of my closet, those ones I’ve purchased, but never worn. The purchases you make when the devil is on your shoulder taunting you and you re-think them, once your inner angel chucks a massive strop because the devil inside has led you so far astray. “That’s the one,” I mumble, knowing the minute I lay my eyes on it. It’s barely there, it exposes more skin than it covers and it was something I wouldn’t have been allowed to wear as respectable Charlotte Groves and fake girlfriend of Oliver Hart.
My doorbell sounds, signalling the arrival of my sisters who are armed with an array of clothes bags, make up, hair styling items and importantly, more wine. “Let’s do this,” I smile and after putting on some classic dance tunes, we begin our night’s preparations, just like we would have done all those years ago.
My girls and I climb into Tommy’s cab and I feel risqué. My outfit will cause a stir and my nervousness reminds me that I am excited about it. My dress is strapless and drops to a dangerous V shape between my breasts; it’s tight and clingy and has a fitted skirt that just covers my butt cheeks. The entire dress is made of soft, touchable black leather and has a silver studded rock ‘n’ roll style belt around the middle. I’m having to wear the smallest thong I own, I wasn’t going to bother, but I’m pretty sure my ass and cooch will be close to exposed when I sit down. The dress doesn’t need many accessories, but I’ve gone full on with a large black choker and wrist cuff. The slim purse I’ve chosen is silver and it matches my platform Jimmy Choo’s perfectly, they look almost holographic when the disco lights hit them. My skin is smooth and oiled and my hair is scraped back into a severe, small pony tail. I don’t need anything to detract from the massive effect the dress is already having and with a hint of simple make up and plump red glossed lips, I look like I’m on the prowl. Which is exactly what I should have been doing all these years, instead of pining for someone who was never going to be mine and pretending to be his girlfriend. A very respectable, country club, charity fund raising girlfriend.
As we enter Purps it feels like my sisters are protecting me on all sides, they’re working a formation that gives me a maximum last minute entrance. The sort of entrance and exposure new Lottie deserves on her first night out.
We pass a few groups of people and as expected, I get the double takes and second glances my ego desires and desperately needs to see this through.
I feel sexy and alive at last.
Neely and Dolly’s outfits are always on the edge of naughty, having men at home means they’re keeping it real. Flo looks like a school mistress let loose and is totally unaware of her allure. The four of us have been hot property since high school. “Drinks,” I shout over the music, with a wink towards the bar man and a nod in the direction of the tequila bottles, I feel in the mood for shots and it’s the kind of fun I want tonight.
After an hour, I feel brave enough to let the dress and it’s enticing powers loose on the dance floor. What starts as a group activity becomes a freeing, single minded experience. With my arms in the air and some amazing tunes to lose control to, I make the most of my rebirth. It’s not long before some random guys appear, circling like vultures to try their luck and because none of them meet the man mountain criteria, I bat them back to the sidelines just as quickly, with ease.
Until I feel a man approach from behind and plaster his body to my back, oh my, he’s huge and his hands feel like they could span my whole waist. Grabbing my hips, he forces me to follow his rhythm and I comply as directed and let loose, enjoying the bump and grind he’s affording me. “Lottie...”
Shit. I know that voice. How did I not recognize him?
My nerves come back to life and I work through the familiarity I missed, his scent, his gravelly voice and his frame. All the things I’m familiar with studying from a far. I try and leave because I’ve made my position on our future clear, we don’t have one. “I don’t think so. You’re going to listen to me.”
“Not fucking happening,” I snap and stride off, making my way to the nearest edge of the dance floor. I know he’s stalking me and for once, I’m prepared to fight this one out, publically, if I have to.
“Up the fucking stairs, now Lottie,” he barks in my ear from behind. “I’m going to say my piece and then you can do what the fuck you like.”
I consider walking off, but I know this is the only way to move forward. Hear him out and then walk away.
I can do that.
I strut and sway my ass in front of him as I climb the stairs, wonder if he can see the thin line of my barely there underwear peeping out as I get closer to the top.
Once inside the office, I throw my purse on the empty desk and move to stand in front of the one way glass that looks down over the thronging mass of people dancing. Dolly is being a tease and enticing Jonas from afar, the smile of his face indicates just how much he’d like to drag her home and show her just how much of a tease she really is. Neely is already in the arms of Chris, her desire is evident so I doubt they’ll be here much longer and Flo is sitting having what appears to be a cultured conversation and drink with Sonny.
Without turning around, I begin, “Say your piece and then let me carry on with my night Oli.”
“Why won’t you let me explain?”
“There is nothing to explain. You’ve fucked around with my life and feelings one too many times and I’m done with that shit. Letting you apologize won’t change that for me, it will only ease your guilt and make you feel better.”
“I don’t think you hearing me out will change how I’m feeling. I know words can’t make things better.”
“Exactly, so move the fuck on Oli,” I grab my purse and turn to look at him, before heading for the door.
“I can’t do that either, I need...”
“You need to carry on with your life and stop acting like this is a real relationship break up. It isn’t and you should be rejoicing. Guys would kill for this shit to be as easy as it should be for you. See you around.”
“Don’t Lottie, I need you to f
ucking listen to me. Ignoring me is just making me angrier.”
“And I thought you liked rough and angry, well fuck, I can’t even get that right. You didn’t want nice country club Charlotte and you don’t want the new leather Lottie either. Good job I don’t actually give a shit.”
In a move so quick I nearly miss it, he flies at me. “Don’t tell me what I want. I always thought you were too good for me. Too... straight. I didn’t want to do things to you, with you, that aren’t meant for girls like you.”
My heart is beating so loudly I swear it’s trying to thump its way out of my chest. I didn’t expect him to say that. He didn’t mean that. He can’t.
“Finally got your attention haven’t I? I can’t change what I’ve done and how I’ve treated you, but I can explain. If you’ll fucking let me?”
I don’t want explanations, explanations lead to complications. I don’t need anything to mess with my head, I just want this over. “Nice girl or bad girl, I tried before and you turned me down, remember? You stopped me and that was all the explanation I needed.”
“For fuck’s sake, your parents had just died. I may be a complete bastard with most people just to get what I want, but I like to think I have some standards. I’m trying to have some standards.”
“OK, thanks for the explanation. Can I leave now? Feel better?”
“I know I don’t deserve your friendship, but I still want it.”
“Friendship,” I laugh with an unbelievable shake of my head, “We’re back to friendship.” I was right not to over think his words. Bad girl or good girl, what he means is, just not this girl. “Whatever, if it means you’ll leave me alone. I’ll pretend to be your friend,” and this time I do make it to the door.
“Shit Lottie, why can I never get the right words out where you’re concerned. Wait.”
“Not necessary, catch you later friend.”
Chapter Fourteen
*****
Oli
What is the matter with me? Why can’t I seem to get this shit right with her?
I watched her strut that fine ass body back to her friends and carry on with her night like I was insignificant.
The old Charlotte is becoming less and less like someone I recognize, but this new girl, all shiny and trussed up in leather is someone I’m finding intriguing, alluring and a big fucking turn on.
Making my way back to the guys, I see that Jonas has relinquished his grip on Dolly so she can shake some serious booty on the dance floor with the other crazy females. “You trying my tricks now Oli?” He says laughing in my direction.
“Not exactly, I didn’t kiss anyone in that office and come to think of it, no one told me I was going to be a dad either.” Jonas doesn’t find this funny, not at all. Take that motherfucker, two can play at this game.
“Ah, don’t get mean Jo,” interjects Chris, “Looks like he’s just crashed and burned, again.”
“Fuck you,” I snap back.
“Sonny,” shouts Chris, “You can forget me paying up, I reckon you had insider information when we made that bet.”
“Hey, not fucking true,” Sonny replies.
I raise my eyebrows at him, “What the hell have you been up to?”
“Nothing, the others are placing bets on who hooks up with one of that lot next and I put my money on you,” he tells me.
Jonas and Chris burst out laughing, they may have had their drama but the real emotion on their faces is love and contentment. A spark of jealousy sears through me.
“Mind you, that guy should be on the ticket, I’d put my money on him winning right now,” Sonny comments, staring across the dance floor.
My eyes follow his line of sight and the searing jealously I felt a moment ago is warring with rage. Lottie is on the dance floor with that prick from the spa. “What the fuck is he doing here?”
“I’m guessing he’s coming to land what he let slip off his hook last time,” confirms an irritating Sonny. Like me, he recognizes the hungry predator in Rick along with the possessive man clawing to be released from within me.
“This ends now,” I slam my nearly full bottle of bud on the bar and begin to work through the throng of dancers, edging closer to them. It’s obvious that Lottie is loving the attention and he’s more than happy to continue with the rhythmic foreplay he’s started. Lottie has her tongue so far down his throat it’s making me horny just imagining her doing that to me, but without the leather outfit on.
Maybe just the shoes. Yeah, I’d make her keep those on.
“How many times am I going to interrupt you pushing your moves on Lottie, before you get the message?” I snarl at him.
I see Lottie’s body lock, my words have been enough to pull her out of the trance she’s in. “Ignore him Lottie,” he says in her ear.
“You fucking ignore me and this shit is getting really ugly, really quickly,” I warn her. In her haze she recognizes my mood and more importantly, my words. I feel shit for playing with her head, but I’m counting on her upbringing and manners kicking in, she won’t want a scene. As predicted, she starts to disengage from Rick and mentally take in her surroundings, remembering where she is and who she is. “Lottie, I think you’ve had enough to drink tonight, let me take you home. You want to continue down this well worn path with him, then do it when you’re thinking clearer,” I reason.
“Not again,” the ass hat pleads with her.
“Um, OK, maybe he’s right. I’m probably not in the best shape right now. Can we pick this up again, another time and definitely another place?”
Shit, she’s giving in way too easily and I’m fucked if I know how to deal with this, now I’ve actually got what I want, or rather what my jealous inner monster wants.
“You win Hart, home it is,” she snaps and walks in the direction of the bar where our friends are.
The guys are trying to hide their laughter. They know I’ve got my shit messed up over this, but the girls, they’re giving her advice via some female telepathy. If I had to, I’d wager that it was cut his dick off and post it to his mom, express delivery. Before I can nail down any finer details, she’s off again in the direction of the door.
“Run along now dude,” Sonny cajoles, causing a loud outburst of hilarity from Jonas and Chris.
Fuck.
I’ll be the butt of all the jokes if I stay and am going to be in for an ear bashing if I go.
Fucking wonderful.
How the hell she is moving so fast in those ridiculously high heeled shoes is beyond me, but I get my ass moving in her direction pretty quickly.
Lottie is waiting impatiently next to my Escalade and I make my way to the passenger side to help her climb in.
No way, no fucking way.
She’s got on the tiniest string panties I’ve seen in a long time and when my brain computes Leather plus shoes plus G string, the only answer I can come up with is enormous fucking hard on.
We get on the road and there’s no mistaking her mood, she’s fuming. The toe tapping and crossed arms are a really obvious give away.
“I didn’t think you knew Rick that well,” I begin.
“I’d know him a hell of a lot better if you didn’t keep showing up at the wrong time,” she grumbles back.
“Maybe he’s not right for you.”
Lottie bursts out laughing and falls forward in her seat. “Jesus, I wanted to hook up and fuck the guy, not run off to Vegas and get married.”
“Do you think that’s a wise move?”
“What’s good for you, may be good for me too.”
I grip the steering wheel so hard I’m sure I could snap it in two. “Don’t go there,” I whisper at her with anger lacing my tone.
“Don’t go where? This Lottie is a free Lottie, she lives for some fun and adventure. She lives for what’s left of her life and her family. I don’t need to apologize or hide what I want in my life.”
“Meaningless hook ups are not what they are cracked up to be.”
“Well I w
ouldn’t fucking know would I? I’ve spent years covering your ass.” There is fire in her voice and the confirmation that I’ve kept her from living her life.
“All I’m saying is, you’re worth more than some quick fuck.”
“Well right now, I can’t even seem to get that,” she exhales in despair, throwing her arms in the air.
“Based on your flirting and leather fuck me dress, I’m finding that really hard to believe.”
“Oh, so now I’m too much of a whore for your taste as well. I cannot fucking win,” she shouts across the car at me.
This is stupid. I refuse to have this fight whilst I’m driving and I can’t look at her. I need to see her eyes and expressions if I want any chance at understanding this Lottie. She’s like a fucking stranger. I swerve the truck down into a dusty dark driveway on the edge of town and screech to a halt. “I didn’t get you out of there to have a fight. I just didn't want you to do anything you might regret.”
“Jesus fucking Christ!” she rages, and before I can stop her she’s out of the truck wandering off into the night.
“Lottie, come back.”
“Fuck you Oliver Hart,” I hear in return.
Now she’s making me really mad. She’s always been a challenging girl, but it’s like she’s deliberately trying to piss me off. I run after her and grab her shoulder to stop her progress and turn her around.
Smack.
“Jesus what’s the matter with you?” I shout at her. Lottie goes to swing the other hand, the one I didn’t manage to catch and I grab that too. “Behave or I’ll make you.”
Lottie’s eye flash and her breathing becomes shallow. This is the last thing I wanted, if she cries, I’m screwed.
With no warning at all, she leans forward and forces her mouth against mine. My body reacts without having to think twice, as I know it’s desperate to. My dick is hard instantly and craving the type of hunger rolling off Lottie’s body. My brain tries to fight my dick with logic, but I’m a red blooded male and horny as fuck, there is no way I’m turning her down again.
Fated Love (The Soul Sisters Series Book 3) Page 11
