Because You're Mine

by K. Langston

  “Fuck no! Are you high? Nobody could ever get sick of looking at Channing’s fine ass hump that floor during his hip hop routine. And that Alex Pettyfer…sweet mother of God…I would drink his bathwater with a sparkly pink straw.” I was certain that if given the opportunity, she would do just that.

  “Ok, fine. I do like that hip hop scene.” I admitted as she joined me again on the sofa.

  Unable to resolve my Barrett crisis, I settled for a long night of hot gorgeous men and lots and lots of wine.

  ***

  The words on the screen were beginning to blur and run together. Tabitha and I had stayed up way too late last night watching half naked men shake their asses, and drinking copious amount of alcohol.

  Hangover was an understatement.

  “Madison,” Barrett’s deep voice jolted my tired mind awake. “I need to see you for a moment, please.” he said before he turned to walk toward his office.

  Barrett was already seated on the other side of his shiny black desk when I entered. Adjusting his tie, he pulled himself forward. “Shut the door, please.” My heart stammered in my chest as I shut the heavy door. I turned to face him. “Sit.”

  “Did I do something wrong?” Smoothing the front of my skirt, I took a seat in front of him.

  He lifted an envelope, sifting it through his thick fingers. “No. You didn’t do anything wrong. Actually, you do everything right.” Barrett’s face softened, allowing me to relax a bit. I swallowed hard, waiting for him to speak. “You did a great job on the Kingston trial.” Barrett laid a McMillan & Shaw envelope in front of me. My name was scrolled perfectly across the front, in his handwriting no less.

  “What’s this?”

  “Open it.”

  Sliding my finger beneath the seal, I peeked inside. It was a check. After I counted the third zero, I was short of breath. “What’s this for?”

  He leaned forward, clasping his hands. “A taste of what you’ll get when you become an associate.”

  I studied his face. His expression was sincere, proud even. And if I hadn’t been sleeping with him for the last few months, I would be happy to accept the check in my hands. I’d worked my ass off for it, spent weeks researching and preparing, side by side with him. But while the majority of the time was spent working, the remaining time was spent...

  “I can’t accept this.”

  “Excuse me?”

  “I’ll never know if I…I’ll never know if I really earned it or not.” Shame burned my face.

  With a sigh, Barrett reclined back in his chair again. His forefinger slid back and forth across the smooth skin between his nose and his mouth. He only executed that move when he was pissed. “Well I’m not sure what the hell that is supposed to mean,” He pointed to the envelope in in my hand, “But that is for all of your hard work here. Nothing more.” Before I could respond, Barrett’s phone pierced the air. Narrowing his dark eyes, he ripped the phone from its cradle. “I told you no interruptions,” he barked down the line, eyes still locked with mine. “Damn it. Fine. Put him through.”

  Barrett covered the mouth of the receiver, holding my stare. “Take the damn money, Madison. You’ve earned it.” He swiveled his big leather chair around, facing the floor to ceiling view of the harbor. “This better be good old man.”

  Leaving the envelope on the chair, I walked with heavy feet back to my desk. Shame, guilt, and disappointment overshadowed any sense of pride I’d once had.

  Who had I become?

  CHAPTER three

  Mistakes are always forgivable,

  if one has the courage to admit them.

  - Bruce Lee

  Balancing my purse on one knee, I dug for my keys. I’d finally retrieved them from the dark depths of my bottomless bag when I sensed someone behind me. Before I could turn around he was pressed against my back. The faint smell of his cologne was my first clue that Barrett must have followed me home.

  What the hell?

  His lips caressed the shell of my ear. “You’re a very stubborn woman, you know that.” Twisting me in place, he pinned me against the door. There was no time to protest before his hungry mouth found mine. Greedy hands pulled my top from my skirt, racing across the pebbled skin beneath. My inner slut yelled…

  Yes.

  Yes.

  Yes.

  But my conscious screamed…

  NO.

  This had to end. If I had any plans for a future at M & S, I could not continue fucking my boss. I shoved at his shoulders, breaking our kiss.

  He took a step back. “What?”

  “We can’t keep doing this. And I thought you said no kissing.”

  “Well, I changed my mind.” he shrugged one shoulder, taking a step forward.

  I held my hand to his chest. “Barrett, I think we should stop. I don’t want this to interfere with my job. And if this continues, I’m afraid it will.”

  “We’re two responsible adults, Madison. I think we can handle sex without letting it get complicated.” he chuckled.

  “Don’t you think we should stop before…before feelings get involved?”

  He studied me for a moment. His lips pressed into a hard line. “You’re right.”

  “I just think it’s for the best.” I added.

  His arm circled my waist, pulling me closer. “I agree. You’re an incredible woman, Madison, and I know without a doubt that you’ll make one hell of a lawyer.” He tilted his head. “Please know that this has no bearing whatsoever on your job performance.” Barrett pulled me tighter; his stern voice left no room for argument.

  “I’m sorry.” I offered to his chest.

  He pulled my chin up to look into my eyes, “Never be sorry Madison. I’m sure as hell not.” Releasing me, he pulled the envelope from the inside of his coat. “Now, I don’t want to hear anything leave that mouth of yours except, thank you.”

  I took the envelope. “Thank you,” He kissed my cheek, then turned and walked away.

  My head was spinning when I fell against my shut apartment door, but I felt a little better. Laying the envelope on the counter, I decided I needed a long, hot soak while I attempted to process the shit storm. Before I could make it to the bathroom, my phone started ringing from my purse. My mother’s sweet face lit the screen.

  “Hey mama,” I answered, happy to hear from her and thankful for the distraction.

  “Maddie, honey you need to come home!”

  The panic in her voice caused my knees to buckle. I sat down on the couch. “What…what is it?” My chest squeezed tight with fear.

  “It’s…it’s your father. He…he had a heart attack this morning.” she broke down.

  What?

  “Is he…” I swallowed hard. “Is he ok?”

  “He’s in surgery now. The doctor says he has a lot of blockage.” she cried into the phone.

  “I’ll be there as soon as I can.” I knew my mother was freaking out, so I was trying to stay calm, but I just wanted to break down too. My parents meant the world to me. I couldn’t bear the thought of losing either one of them.

  Once my mother told me what hospital they were at, I booked a flight. I threw what I could in a carry-on, and hauled ass to the airport. I had an hour to spare before my flight, so I took that time to call Barrett and explain what had happened. He told me to take as much time as I needed, and to let him know when I landed safely. Then I called Tabitha to fill her in as well.

  A mountain of weight pressed down heavy on my chest. My previous problems seemed trivial compared to what I was now facing. Unable to suppress my emotions any longer, I allowed the ugly tears to fall until they called my flight to board.

  ***

  I arrived at Memphis International just after midnight. Once I rented a car, I shot Barrett and Tabitha a quick text letting them know that I had landed safely, and then I called my mother. She informed me that my father had made it out of surgery and the doctors said all went well. He was in ICU and would remain there for the next several days. I fel
t a little of that weight ease up, but the fear was still there.

  My father had only been in ICU for a couple of hours when I arrived, so they would only allow my mother to see him. The doctor told us that the next twenty-four hours were critical. He would need to be monitored closely throughout the night, so visitors were limited.

  Sitting with my mother in the waiting room, we cried into each other’s arms. “I was so scared, Maddie. I don’t know what I would do if I lost him.” She dabbed her eyes with a tissue, and then wiped her runny nose.

  “How could he have a heart attack? He’s so young.” I sniffled.

  “Dr. Woods put him on blood pressure medicine last year, and told him he needed to exercise more and change his diet. But you know how he is. He’s so damn hard headed. I don’t think he’s been taking his medicine like he’s supposed to. I feel so guilty. I should’ve made sure he was takin’ his medicine.”

  “Mama, you shouldn’t have to baby sit a grown man.”

  “I know. But I’m his wife. It’s my job to take care of him. I just hope this opens his eyes. If Holden hadn’t of found him, Maddie,” Her body shook as she broke down again.

  Pain stabbed at my chest and I found it hard to swallow. “Uh, who’s Holden?” I asked, rubbing my hand up and down her back as she cried into my shoulder.

  She pulled away, wiping her nose again.

  “He’s the one that found him. He saved his life.”

  She informed me as if I should know this already. “Well, I’ll be sure to thank him then.”

  She nodded with a small smile. “I have to pee. And I need some coffee. You need anything, sweetie?” My mother cupped my face, kissing me softly on my hairline. I found comfort and solace in her touch. I found everything I needed right there.

  I smiled into her hands. “I’m good.”

  “I’ll be right back.” she whispered, patting my cheek.

  “Ok.” Tears stung the corners of my eyes.

  My problems in Boston compounded with this terrifying situation were beginning to take its toll. Mentally and physically spent, I laid my head down on the chair next to me and begged for sleep to claim me. Thankfully, that didn’t take too long.

  Around five o’clock, a nurse informed my mother that my father was awake, but could only have visitors for fifteen minutes at a time. My father being less than coherent due to the pain meds they had him on, I opted to go home and get some sleep before returning later that evening.

  My repeated requests for my mother to join me were quickly rejected. I should’ve known better. The only way she would leave that hospital was with my father. I arranged for the rental car to be picked up, and then armed with a list of what to bring back, I drove my mother’s car home.

  A thirty minute drive south of Memphis would take you to a quiet little Mississippi town tucked away in the middle of nowhere. We lived about ten miles outside of my hometown of Hernando. I hated the reasons that brought me here, but it felt so good to be home. Forgotten were the reasons I’d always wanted to leave this sleepy little town when I turned down the gravel drive. I quickly rolled down the windows, allowing fresh air mixed with a hint of honeysuckle to flood my nose with memories.

  Once I put the car in park, Drake met me at the door. “Hey sweet boy,” I knelt down and let him lick my face while I scratched behind his ears. “You missed me, huh?” After a few more licks, I made my way toward the front of the house.

  The white two story house with its shiny copper roof and black shutters looked like something you would see in Southern Living magazine. Abundant ferns dripped from the roof of the wrap around porch, and I could see my mother’s latest novel laying on the cushioned swing. Dropping my purse and bag in the foyer, I drug my feet into the living room. Falling face first into the couch, I released a heavy breath.

  Absolutely nothing had changed. It had been almost a year since the last time I’d been home, and everything was exactly the same. I breathed it all in, the familiar smell blessing me with an overwhelming sense of peace and calm. A newfound comfort that I’d never felt before had warmth settling deep inside my chest.

  Nearly losing someone you love could do a lot to one’s perspective.

  Stretching out contentedly, I pulled my great grandmother’s cream afghan from the back of the couch to cover myself. Snuggling beneath the soft blanket, I fisted my hands beneath my chin.

  Home.

  CHAPTER four

  Home is where the heart is.

  -Pliny the Elder

  Just as it had a million times before, the loud Coo! of the coo coo clock jolted me awake.

  Stupid clock.

  I sure as hell didn’t miss that damn thing. At five o’clock in the morning and five o’clock in the evening, without fail, that asshole belted…

  Coo Coo!

  As a child, I loved it, but as I grew older I secretly plotted ways to destroy it.

  Rubbing the sleep from my eyes, I stretched against the couch. I felt slightly refreshed, but I was still exhausted. Grabbing my bag from the foyer, I ran upstairs to take a quick shower. Once I retrieved the list of items for my mother, I made myself a grilled cheese.

  Standing at the kitchen sink rinsing my plate, I caught movement outside the window.

  Someone was leaning under the hood of my old jeep parked on the side of the house. I’d told my father to get rid of that old thing several times over the years, but he never would. Maybe he’d changed his mind. I had to admit, I would be very sad if he got rid of it now.

  Without another moment’s hesitation, I marched myself outside. The screen door closed with a loud thwack behind me as I closed the distance between the house and my jeep.

  When he twisted his head at the sound of the slamming door, my determined boots skidded to an abrupt halt, causing loose gravel to crunch heavily beneath my feet. Paralyzing blue eyes held me in place, stunning me with their raw beauty. I had no idea what to compare them to, but they were unlike any color I’d ever seen before. Far more beautiful than any sky or ocean.

  Whoa.

  It was sticky hot outside today. The humidity in the air had beads of sweat tickling my upper lip, but there was no denying the chill bumps that pebbled across my skin as those striking blue eyes roamed my body. Standing to face me properly, his tan arms flexed impressively as he wiped his filthy hands with a grease rag.

  The sight of a man doing that should absolutely not be a turn on.

  But God help me…it was.

  Well-worn jeans rested low on his lean hips, forcing my lips to part on a sigh. I was drinking in as much of him as I could.

  So why was I still so damn thirsty?

  His dirty ball cap was pulled down low on his brow, but not low enough to conceal those gorgeous blues. They were big and bright, and they shined back at me like a beacon in a storm. I licked my parched lips in appreciation at the beautiful man standing before me. His perfect lips turned up at the corners, and I knew it right then.

  I was in deep shit.

  That smile could definitely be defined as a panty dropper. I’d never had an urge such as this. I felt so drawn to this stranger, and for reasons I could not even begin to comprehend, I wanted to reach out and touch him. My hands flexed at my sides. I wanted to do a hell of a lot more than just touch him. Thankfully, my mind finally sent warning signals to the rest of my body. I was standing there, gawking at him, like a lust crazed fool. “Who the hell are you?” I demanded, irritation scratching the surface of my desire.

  “You must be Maddie.” he stated with a lazy smile.

  Oh God, that smile was incredible.

  His deep voice dripping with sex was laced thick with a strong southern accent.

  “And you are?” I fixed my hands on my hips, narrowing my eyes. I would not smile back at him-damn it.

  “I’m Holden,” My irritation quickly deflated and realization took its place. His hand reached for mine

  “You saved my father’s life.” Before I could take his offered hand, he pulled
it away, nodding towards the jeep.

  “Nah, I just called 911. The paramedics saved his life.” He wiped at his hands again.

  Damn, I wish he’d stop doing that.

  All I could think about were those hands on me. “Well, thank you. My father means the world to me, and I can’t imagine what would’ve happened if…” The knot in my throat stunted my bubbling emotions.

  Holden cleared his throat, shoving that useles rag into his back pocket. “I think you’re good to go here. I topped ‘er off with a few quarts of oil, aired up the tires and replaced all the spark plugs. She should get you ‘round with no problems at all.” he said proudly, slamming the hood of the jeep.

  Standing only an arm’s length away, the scent of his cologne slammed into my nose like a Mack truck. How could someone look that dirty smell so good?

  “I’ll be by tomorrow to check on things. Nice to meet cha, Maddie.” That remarkable smile when he said my name caused a tingle to race across my skin and my breath to stall.

  “Check on things?” I shoved out, following him to the shiny black Ford sitting in the driveway.

  “Mrs. Waters said they wouldn’t be home from the hospital for few days. They asked me to look in on the place. Finish up in the fields.” Opening the door to his pickup, he turned to face me through the rolled down window.

  “That won’t be necessary,” I huffed. “I know how to drive a tractor, and I’ve baled those fields hundreds of times with daddy.” He chuckled and those damn blue eyes of his sparkled with amusement.

  Did he doubt me?

  Aw, hell naw.

  I found my own cocky smile. “I take it you’ve never met a woman that could handle heavy equipment?” I asked, raising one eyebrow.

  He stepped away from the door, a playful grin hanging back on his relaxed face. “Oh, I’ve met a few. Just none quite like you.”

  Blood pounded my ears while furious heat raced through my veins. My face only inches from his; I pressed my finger right into the center of his firm chest. The tiny contact was like a current sending sparkling heat to pool hot between my legs.