by Jason Ayres
“You’re right, it won’t be that version,” said Kent. “At no point are we going to meet up in the past both remembering all of this. When you get there, you will meet my blissfully unaware seventeen-year-old self who will know nothing about any of this. That gives you a significant advantage over me, and everyone else, come to that.”
“It’s not like you didn’t have that advantage when you went back, though, was it?” asked Kay. “And knowing how I felt about you…how I still feel about you, it wouldn’t have been difficult for you to take advantage of me. Not that I would have minded, obviously.”
“I hardly think I was taking advantage of you,” said Kent. “From what I recall it was you coming on to me.”
“So something did happen then?” exclaimed Kay, enthusiastically.
“Look, you’ve wheedled enough information out of me already,” said Kent. “We probably shouldn’t even be having this conversation – it might contravene the angel’s rules, not that he’s particularly forthcoming on that front. All I’m willing to say at this stage is that I went back there to fix things so that I would be your ball date, rather than Glen. What happened after that I want to keep to myself, at least until you return. Just follow your feelings, enjoy the moment and let things happen naturally.”
“That’s good enough for me,” she said. “By the way, how did you get rid of Glen?”
“Let’s just say he was indisposed and leave it at that,” replied Kent. “Don’t worry: I didn’t bump him off or anything.”
“I’ll need to get rid of him as well,” said Kay. “Any suggestions?”
“I’m sure you’ll think of something,” replied Kent. “He’s not as clever as he thinks he is, and you’ve got all that life experience that he won’t have back then.”
“You’re right, he was all brawn and no brains,” said Kay. “I’ll get him out of the picture, no problem.”
“Right, that’s all I’m telling you – for now, at least,” said Kent. “We’ll compare notes when you come back.”
“Thank you,” replied Kay, gratefully. “Will you be in here again tomorrow night? I’m meeting the angel again in the morning, and that’s when I’m planning to make the trip.”
“I wasn’t planning on coming down here tomorrow,” replied Kent. “Debs doesn’t like me going out on Sunday nights. But I am keen to hear how you got on, so I shall try and find a reason to pop down for a bit. And now we really should be getting back to the bar before Andy tells the whole pub we are having an affair.”
He drained the last of his pint and got up from the chair, eager to replenish his glass.
“I’ve often imagined what it would be like if we were,” said Kay, instantly regretting it when she saw the irritated look that crossed Kent’s face.
“Look, Kay, we need to get one thing clear. Whatever might happen in the trip you are about to take to the past, it’s not going to change anything here. I’m happy to be your friend, especially now we’ve discovered what we have in common, but you must stop thinking we might get together in the future.”
“I know,” she said. “I’m sorry. I just keep thinking about how different our lives might have been if it hadn’t been for Glen wrecking our chance all those years ago.”
“Look, just go to the day of the ball and enjoy whatever happens. That’s all you can do. Seize the moment.”
Kay agreed and the two of them returned to the bar. They had nothing to worry about where Andy was concerned. He was still perched on his stool, now boring a couple of young women who were waiting to get served with his usual fabricated tales about his non-existent rockstar past.
Kay didn’t linger in the pub for once, wanting to get a decent night’s sleep. She also didn’t feel like getting out of her skull to drown her sorrows, as for once she didn’t have any. Instead of needing to blot out the misery of her seemingly futile existence, there was suddenly plenty to feel enthusiastic about. She was going on a series of adventures through her own past and life seemed full of possibilities again.
She still felt sad that her crush on Kent seemed destined to remain unrequited, but she had to be realistic and do the right thing. She had vowed she wouldn’t mess around with married men: his wife didn’t deserve it, and neither did his kids. It was time to accept that they had no future together.
But she had a chance to get this particular monkey off her back in the past. He had more or less given her the green light to go ahead and make the most of the opportunity, and she planned to wring every drop of enjoyment from it that she could.
She was relieved on returning to the chip shop to see there was no sign of the dreaded McVie. She was still hungry so she got herself a bag of chips. She fancied some fish, too, but didn’t have enough money for cod. A fresh batch of fish cakes had just been put out, so she ordered one of those instead, before going up to her room to think about the day ahead.
After she had eaten her supper she got into bed and wrapped the duvet around herself. It was still desperately cold in the room.
She flicked on the TV to see if there was anything interesting on, but there was only Match of the Day on BBC1. She wasn’t interested in football, so flicked across to BBC2 which was showing a rerun of an old panel game. She watched that for a while but it wasn’t long before she fell asleep, the TV still playing in the background.
In the morning, she woke refreshed, and even more excited than she had been the night before. She practically bounded out of bed, so keen was she to get started. It was nearly nine o’clock and when she headed into the bathroom, the angel was already waiting for her in the mirror.
“Morning!” said Kay, full of the joys of spring despite the fact that her feet were like blocks of ice and the mirror had steamed up as soon as she breathed on it. “And what a fantastic one it’s going to be.”
The angel’s face was a little blurred through the mist, but she could still make out that it had a disapproving look.
“Yes, well, before we get started, we need to get something clear.”
“What’s that?” asked Kay.
“Confidentiality,” replied the angel. “When I gave you this opportunity, I hadn’t expected you to go straight down to the pub and start blabbing about it to all and sundry.”
“It was hardly all and sundry,” protested Kay. “I only told one person and as it turns out, he knows all about you already.”
“I know,” said the angel. “But I would prefer it if you didn’t tell anyone else about any of this. I offer these trips only to a very few selected individuals in the strictest confidence. If everyone started going around telling people about it, where would we be? There would be busloads of time travel tourists, ghost hunters and all sorts of other weirdos turning up here. I’d be bracketed with the Loch Ness Monster and Bigfoot. Everyone would be trying to get a glimpse of me.”
“I can’t believe you are worried about something like that, what with all the powers you claim to have,” replied Kay. “What are they going to do, throw a net over the mirror? Anyway, you never said anything about not telling anyone.”
“No, I didn’t. Perhaps I should have done,” said the angel. “I think it’s about time I started issuing a list of terms and conditions to people before I let them loose in the past. Something to make sure they are crystal-clear on the rules before we start.”
“Maybe you should,” said Kay. “So you don’t have to tick me off again, is there anything else I should or shouldn’t be doing before we carry on?”
“Just don’t tell anyone else,” said the angel. “And we will see how we get on.”
“Fair enough,” replied Kay. “So can we get started now?” she added impatiently.
“We can,” said the angel. “This is the bit where I normally ask people where they want to go, but there won’t be any prizes for guessing in this case. Would it be the day of the ball, by any chance? It’s all you’ve been thinking about for the past day.”
“Got it in one,” replied Kay.
�
�This should be interesting,” said the angel. “Often I say when people go back that this will be version 2.0 of the day, but in this case it’s going to be version 3.0. But then you already figured that out, judging by your conversation with Kent last night.”
“You know it’s quite rude to eavesdrop on private conversations,” said Kay, feeling slightly uncomfortable at the thought of the angel monitoring her every move.
“Sorry, it’s just that I find this whole process so fascinating, I don’t like to miss a single thing that happens,” replied the angel. “Don’t worry about it. Just go back and enjoy your day.”
“And can I talk to Richard about it afterwards?” she asked.
“Well, I can’t see in this instance it will matter much,” said the angel. “But like I said before, no one else.”
“I’m hardly likely to,” said Kay. “I don’t want to get carted off to the loony bin. Forget coachloads of time travel tourists and the Loch Ness Monster. I’m more likely to end up in a mental institution if I go around telling people I’m a time traveller who talks to an angel in a mirror.”
“But you people watch enough movies and films with similarly preposterous premises,” said the angel.
“But that’s just fantasy,” replied Kay. “People watching know it’s only a fantasy. If you ask me, the characters in these films are far too accepting of the situation when someone claims to be a time traveller. In real life, if anyone went around claiming to be a time traveller, 99% of people would think they were insane. And the 1% who did believe them would probably be insane themselves. The only reason I believe in it now is because I’ve seen it with my own eyes. Now can we please have less talk and more action? I’ve got a ball to go to!”
“Your wish is my command,” replied the angel, clicking her fingers in the mirror to bring the conversation to an end.
The next thing she knew, Kay was waking up in her teenage bedroom.
Chapter Nine
July 1994
The sun was pouring through the window and the room was warm. She had travelled back once again to a day in the summer. It was a hot July morning and just like before she felt the energy of youth coursing through her veins.
She sat up and looked around, images of her teenage life all around her. Her duvet cover was bright red and covered in white hearts. The walls were adorned with posters of the indie bands that she had loved in her youth: Saint Etienne, Blur and The Charlatans.
The poster of Saint Etienne’s Foxbase Alpha album cover triggered some happy memories. They had been the first band she had ever gone to see, a gig at the Equinox Club in Leicester Square in 1993. It had been an amazing night, travelling down with three girl friends on the train from Oxford. It was one of the most fondly remembered nights of her youth and one she would certainly consider revisiting. She had been at that age when fresh and new experiences were happening all the time.
It was the first and only time she had got to see Saint Etienne live. Years later she found out the band were doing a special 25th anniversary tour celebrating the release of Foxbase Alpha. She had really wanted to go, but it hadn’t happened. She hadn’t kept in touch with those two friends. They were long lost in the past.
When she had tentatively mentioned going to one of the reunion concerts to Alan, he dismissed the suggestion as ridiculous. She was far too old to be running around going to gigs, he had said.
That had been pretty much the sort of response she got to most suggestions throughout their relationship. Even when they were younger, he wasn’t interested in going anywhere or doing anything remotely exciting.
One year, when her daughter was still a toddler, she had had the chance to go to Glastonbury, but he had put a stop to that, too. He said it was inappropriate for her to go off to a pop festival like that when she had the responsibility of looking after a child, and besides, his golf society were away on one of their trips that weekend. That was the sort of selfish bastard he was.
She needed to forget about Alan for the moment. There would be plenty of time to think up a way for him to get his come-uppance later on. Today was all about her and Kent.
The clock told her it was nearly 8.30am. She wandered across the room to her Sanyo stereo system. It was black ash, and had four layers to it. There was a turntable on the top, with a radio on the second layer. The third deck was a CD player and finally a twin cassette deck. She pressed eject on the CD to see what popped out – unsurprisingly, it was Foxbase Alpha. Resisting the temptation to listen, instead she flicked on the radio, keen to immerse herself in the day at hand.
She was greeted by the familiar voice of Steve Wright presenting the breakfast show on Radio 1, along with his posse. It cut to the news which she listened to with interest. The lead story was about O.J. Simpson being tried for murder. She had forgotten all about that, but it had been huge at the time.
The weather forecast said it was going to be hot and sunny with a maximum temperature of 29 °C. She didn’t need the radio to tell her that, she could see it was a glorious day just from looking out of the window. In her memories, the ball had taken place on a lovely warm summer’s evening. Clearly those memories hadn’t lied.
She couldn’t have asked for better weather. What a tonic after struggling through the cold, dark December days of 2018.
It was time to think more about the day ahead. What were her objectives and how was she going to accomplish them? What did she want to get out of this day?
She was pretty clear what her objectives were. It was how she was going to go about it that was less clear. She needed to bin Glen off and ensure Kent took her to the ball instead. That was the first part, but she wanted more. Kent had told her to seize the moment and that was exactly what she intended to do.
This had been the night she had lost her virginity. She had every intention of seeing that part of history fulfilled, albeit with a different partner. She had to accept that Kent didn’t want her in 2018, so this was going to be her one and only chance to sleep with him. It was vital she didn’t waste it.
She did not want to waste the rest of the day either. The ball might not be until the evening, but she certainly wasn’t going to sit around the house waiting until it was time to go out. She wanted to see as much of Kent as she could, so she needed to get out there and make things happen.
So, she was pretty clear on what she needed to do, but what about the application? How was she going to get rid of Glen? She had enjoyed Kent’s tale of how he had spiked him with laxatives. It would have been fun to humiliate him with some similarly diabolical scheme, but time was of the essence. She didn’t have time to hatch some elaborate plot. She needed to get the job done quickly and effectively.
All she had to do was tell Glen straight that she wasn’t going to the ball with him. It was her prerogative after all. And she wouldn’t pull any punches while she was doing it. Glen may have been an arrogant son of a bitch even back then, but he would be no match for Kay with all her years of experience behind her, not to mention the benefit of her hindsight.
She would go and let him know in no uncertain terms what she thought of him. That would be satisfaction enough. As soon as she had done that, she would be straight round to Kent to give him the good news that he did have a date for the ball after all.
She needed to get herself ready. She looked through her wardrobe, delighted to find some long-forgotten favourite clothes that she would never have squeezed her forty-three-year-old frame into. She also found a Catwoman costume hanging there. Of course, she recalled. The theme of the ball had been superheroes.
She picked out a skimpy, pale lemon dress, the perfect item for this gorgeous summer’s day. It looked impossibly small but she knew at this age it would fit her.
She dressed quickly, eager to get on with the matter in hand. Going downstairs in search of breakfast, she discovered that the house was empty. Her mum and dad were both out at work. She was initially disappointed, as she very much wanted to see them both again, but consoled her
self with the thought that she was sure to see them in the evening.
She hadn’t come back to this day purely to relive the ball. Part of her multitasking agenda involved seeing her parents again, which was just as important as seeing Kent, because by 2018 both of them were dead.
Keen to keep her strength up for the day ahead, she prepared herself a decent breakfast of Weetabix and toast, washed down with coffee and orange juice. As she ate alone in the kitchen where she had eaten almost all her meals for the first nineteen years of her life, she sat and thought about her parents.
Kay had been an only child, born to them when they were both over forty. After years of trying and failing to conceive, her mother’s pregnancy had come as a complete surprise when it finally happened. By her teenage years they were already in their late-fifties. Both of them drank an awful lot of alcohol, a trait it seemed Kay had inherited as she grew older. In the end, the drink had killed them both.
Despite being an only child, she had inherited nothing. If she had, she wouldn’t be in the mess she was in now. Sadly, her parents had never owned their own home. When they had married in 1963 they had got a council house, as millions of others had in those days. Her dad was a manual worker on the railways and her mother stayed at home. They had never been short of money and had a comfortable living but they had no assets.
Her father had talked about buying the house during the right-to-buy bonanza of the late-1980s, but by then it was too late. Even at the knock-down prices the houses were being offered at, they couldn’t get a mortgage. Not only was he considered to be too old, he had also been forced to retire early through ill health.
She didn’t blame her parents for any of this. They had loved her and nurtured her, and that was worth more than any inheritance. But how she wished they were still around in 2018 to give her some sanctuary in the desperate times she had found herself. The day she had left home to live with Alan, her father had promised that there would always be a place for her as long as they were alive.
