“I love you,” he whispered as he brushed his lips against hers. “More than you will ever know.”
She buried her fingers in his hair and drew him close again, their tongues mingling as their bodies did, doing the dance of two. It was the best way she could return his sentiment, the best way she could show him just how deep her own feelings ran.
And when they both reached that moment of climax, their bodies wrapped tight against one another, their cries mingling in the air around them, she had only one thought on her mind.
Please, God, this would be the perfect moment to create a life!
It was all she could ask for, all that was left to make her world perfect.
Chapter 16
Chicago, Illinois
Astoria Hotel
Ryder woke later than he had in a very long time. And he felt rested, something else that was highly unusual. For a moment, he didn’t know where he was. But then Kelly sighed in her sleep, wiggling her butt against his hip, and it all came rushing back to him.
He slipped out of bed, careful not to disturb her. Papers and pictures were all over the floor; the case file Jared had brought them. He began picking it up, his eyes scanning the words on this page and that.
Justifiable shooting . . . suspect’s decision . . . unavoidable . . . potential life or death situation . . . followed training protocols . . .
He’d never seen this file, but he knew what was in it. The same district attorney who’d given it to Jared had offered to give it to Ryder. But he hadn’t felt it would change anything. Yet, hearing Jared say the things he had last night had done what seeing this file would never have done. It helped him see the bigger picture from a different perspective.
It wasn’t like those words had relieved him of the guilt that would probably follow him around for the rest of his life. But it had made him understand that it was a bad situation, and they both made choices that they probably shouldn’t have. He’d gone over it in his head millions of times over the past two years and examined ways in which he could have handled the whole thing differently. He could have tried to disarm Jordan without pulling his gun. He could have given Jordan more time to heed his warning. He could have gone back to his car and called for backup. There were so many things he could have done differently. Granted, not all of those options would have given him the same chance at survival, but all of them would have avoided the bullet that altered Jordan’s life irreparably.
But, after listening to Jared, he realized that Jordan also had choices. He didn’t have to join that gang; he didn’t have to accept the drugs they’d given to him. He didn’t have to carry a gun, and he definitely didn’t have to pull it on Ryder. And he didn’t have to ignore Ryder’s orders to put the gun down.
It wasn’t all Jordan’s fault what had happened. But it wasn’t all Ryder’s, either. They’d both made bad choices, and they both had to live with their decisions.
Ryder felt better knowing that Jordan’s mother and brothers were doing well. He’d been sending them $2,000 a month, aware that it wasn’t enough to pay all of Jordan’s expenses, but enough to keep them afloat as far as food, rent, and utilities went. And when he had a little more, he sent that, too. Mastiff paid well, and he’d been able to send them plenty these last months without feeling it. In fact, he’d been sending his mother money, too. He didn’t need much.
It would feel odd not sending those checks anymore.
“Leave that stuff and come back to bed,” Kelly said.
Ryder turned, a smile he couldn’t hide spreading wide across his face as he took in the length of her naked body, exposed as she shifted and caused the sheet to fall from her. He set the file down in the chair and climbed onto the bed, straddling her as he dropped kisses all over her face. She laughed, pushing him away.
“I’ve missed you.”
She tilted her head slightly. “Well, that makes one of us.”
He laughed, smacking her hip as he rolled onto his back beside her. “What would you think if we started a nonprofit for kids living in East Atlanta? Maybe sponsor a new community center, give those kids a place to go after school that’s not the streets.”
“I think it’s a brilliant idea.”
He rolled onto his side and pushed a hair out of her face. “We could use the money I’ve been sending to Jordan’s mother.”
She nodded. “Or we could just use the money I made on my first book series. It’s like five million or something.”
“Or something?” His eyebrows rose high. “You made that much?”
She shrugged. “People seem to like them.”
“Of course they do. You’re a brilliant writer.”
“I don’t know about that. But there’s plenty of money coming in. You could quit your job and never work again.”
“There’s an idea.” He thought about it for a minute, tapping his finger against his lips. “A kept man. I think I could handle that.”
She laughed, slapping his arm. “You’d go crazy after a week at home with nothing to do.”
“I could run the nonprofit.”
“Yes. But that would require moving back to Atlanta.”
He shrugged. “I was never all that fond of Springfield, anyway.”
She rolled into him and dropped a kiss on his shoulder. “Everyone will be so happy to see you back.”
“Not everyone.”
“Those who aren’t will come around fairly quickly. You’ll see.”
He kissed the top of her head. “Can I ask you something?”
“Anything.”
“What was going on between you and Dane Hood?”
Kelly groaned. She pulled back, sitting up so that her beautiful breasts were right in his line of vision. It was hard to concentrate on what she was saying, but he did his best to focus.
“He was a nice guy who took an immediate interest in me. But it never went further than that.”
“He thinks it did. He called me yesterday, demanding to talk to you because you weren’t answering your phone.”
“Did he really?”
“Yeah.”
She shook her head, her eyes drifting toward the door. “I told him before we left for Chicago that I didn’t think I was all that interested in a relationship. But he insisted I think about it while I was gone, said that he’d give me as much time as I needed.”
“I guess he changed his mind.”
She sighed. “I should call him and tell him more straightforward.” She focused on Ryder, this ghost of a smile touching her lips. “He kissed me, but it just wasn’t the same, you know. I think I knew at that moment that I couldn’t be with anyone but you.”
“You could. But I’m glad you decided not to.”
Ryder sat up and drew her into his arms, his kiss lingering on her lips. She moved into him, kissing him with all the passion and determination she had in her slight body. She pushed him back against the pillows and straddled him, taking him into her before he could even catch his breath. He loved her take charge attitude, her clear understanding of what she wanted and what she liked. And he loved feeling her body wrapped around his, watching the pleasure dance in her eyes, feeling the quiver of her muscles when that pleasure reached its ultimate height.
He loved her.
They showered together a short time later and headed out for another reading. She held his hand as they walked through the lobby and winked at him as she read that same passage she’d been reading since this little tour began. He knew what it was about, could hear his own words coming out of the mouth of her character. And he could see now what it had done to her to hear him speak those words. He swore to himself he’d never be that weak again. He’d never walk away from her just because it seemed like the right thing to do. It would never be the right thing.
He stood at the back of the room and watched her, prouder than he’d ever been in his life. Then came time for the autographs. He stood behind her, again watching for anyone who might grab at her wrist or do something even more dangerous. His
fear for her safety had waned a little since Jared’s conversation with them last night, but there was still the reality that her friend had been murdered after going on a date in Kelly’s name. He’d keep an eye out, but now that they’d ruled out any attachment to the events of two years ago, he couldn’t imagine anyone else coming after her. It all had to be a coincidence.
He’d seen the case file on Tracy Logan’s murder. Someone had beaten her in close quarters. That suggested a frustrated lover or someone she knew. Not an attack by someone misled as to her identity.
He was grateful that Tracy’s death had brought Kelly back into his life, but he was pretty sure her fears were no longer sustainable. It was a tragedy, but an unrelated one.
Still, he watched over her. He had no intention of leaving her on her own, not now, not ever. She was his wife, and he was going to keep her safe, even from dangers that never really existed.
“Done,” she said, exhaustion in her voice as she stood from the table, the last of her fans walking out the front door of the bookstore.
“Good. Let’s get out of here, go find a nice dinner somewhere.”
She smiled. “That sounds wonderful.”
They walked hand in hand out the back of the store to the alley where the SUV waited. Ryder opened Kelly’s door and stole a kiss as she moved around him to get inside. They stood there for a long moment, their lips lingering.
“Look at this,” a voice behind Ryder called out. “I should have known.”
Kelly stiffened in his arms as she recognized the voice as belonging to Dane Hood. She looked up at him, this expression that said, I told you so, on her face. She moved around him, but he rested his hand on her hip, keeping her close.
“Dane, I tried to tell you before we left Springfield.”
“You said you weren’t ready for a relationship. You didn’t say you were falling for your damn bodyguard!”
“He’s my husband.”
Dane’s eyebrows rose, but he didn’t seem surprised by this revelation. “He left you two years ago after he shot some kid and caused him to suffer brain damage. Bad move, brother.”
Ryder shrugged as he turned to face Dane, too. “We all make mistakes.”
“I’ve never shot a kid I pulled over for failing to signal.” Dane smiled a bright smile that seemed a little crazy to Ryder, setting off warning bells in his head. “But I’ve beat a few women to death.”
Kelly stiffened. “What does that mean?”
“I don’t like being brushed aside, is what that means. I don’t fall easily, and I don’t like my affections being ignored.” He lifted his hand in a casual shrug. “I’m a good guy. I could make someone a really good husband. I don’t know why you wouldn’t want me.”
“I’m sure you’ll make someone very happy, Dane. Just not me.”
His smile disappeared, but so did the humanity in his eyes. He suddenly had this dead look about him, like everything that made him human had just evaporated. Ryder knew that look. He’d seen it on the faces of Taliban followers who had bombs strapped to their chests.
Ryder pulled Kelly behind him as he stepped forward just slightly, his other hand going for the gun he kept strapped under his jacket.
“I want you, Kelly,” Dane said. “I’ve read all your books, and I think you and I are a lot alike. Your main characters, especially the men, are just like me. I’m the man you want. I know I am. I can give you the life your characters want from their men because I am the embodiment of those men!”
Kelly shook her head. “No, Dane. Those men are based on Ryder, not you.”
It was the wrong thing for her to say. Dane’s expression tightened, and it was obvious he wasn’t going to take no for an answer. Ryder pushed Kelly back, shoving her into the front seat of the SUV behind the open door where they’d been standing. She began to slide over, jumping into the driver’s seat even as Dane pulled his gun. He fired as Ryder raised his gun, getting off two quick shots as he climbed into the passenger seat. Kelly gunned the engine, the forward motion forcing the door closed as they plowed out of that alley.
“Where do we go?” Kelly demanded.
“The hotel.”
She pressed the accelerator, speeding through the streets, passing cars at a dangerous rate. Ryder reached over and touched her hand.
“Slow down. If we get pulled over, it’ll make things even more complicated, okay?”
She glanced at him, her expression calming at first, but then tightening when she saw the blood on his fingers where his hand was pressed to his shoulder.
“He shot you?”
“It’s just a graze. It’ll be fine.”
“But Ryder—”
“Drive, Kelly. The sooner we get behind a locked door in a hotel filled with security guards, the better.”
She nodded, slowing down, but driving steady and rushing through every yellow light. They arrived at the hotel ten minutes later, the tension between them giving Ryder a headache. He shoved his gun back into the holster, and his hand in his pocket so as not to be too obvious about his wounded arm. They made it to the elevator without anyone attempting to stop them and into their room without seeing anyone suspicious. Ryder tore off his jacket and groaned with pain as he lifted off his shirt, ducking into the bathroom to look at the damage. Kelly was behind him, her eyes wide with fright.
“It’s okay,” he reassured her, squeezing the sides of the wound together. “Just a graze, like I told you.” He hoped she didn’t hear the relief in his voice and realize how concerned he’d been before seeing it in the mirror. There was a lot of blood, but it was beginning to slow.
She found a washrag and wet it in the sink, pressing it to the wound. He hissed but stood still and let her administer first aid to him. She made a bandage out of a torn edge of his shirt, both of them ignoring the fact that there was a gift shop downstairs that likely carried bandages. When she was done, it ached like a son-of-a-bitch, but the bleeding had stopped, and the wound was protected. He pulled on a clean shirt and pulled his cell phone, reporting into Mastiff.
“What now?” she asked when he got off the phone.
“They’re sending backup. They’ll get us out of here and contact the authorities.”
“He’s crazy, isn’t he?”
Ryder tilted his head. “Looks like it.”
“How could I let that into our lives?”
“No, Kelly, don’t start down that road. This isn’t your fault. It’s no one’s fault but Dane Hood’s.”
“Did he kill Tracy?”
He didn’t have to answer. She could see the truth on his face.
She turned away and began to pace, agitated by this information. “Is it because of my books? Is that how he knows about me? But why would he target me? Why would he want anything to do with me?”
“He’s crazy, babe. He might have focused on anyone who fit his insane criteria.”
“Maybe.”
“Not maybe. You can’t predict what will set someone like him off. And you can’t blame yourself.”
She shook her head. He grabbed her and pulled her around into his arms. “It’s going to be okay. We’re going to go back to Springfield, packing our stuff, and going home to Atlanta. Okay? We just have to hold on for a few hours, that’s all.”
She nodded. “I know. I just—”
“I won’t let anything happen to you.”
“Yeah?” She looked up at him, brushed his cheek with her fingers. “And who’s going to protect you?”
“How about this? How about we protect each other.”
She smiled, and he loved the sight of it. He kissed her gently, then drew her out onto the balcony. He put his gun into her hand and asked, “Do you remember when we went to the firing range with your dad?”
“I do.”
“You remember how to shoot a gun?”
She laughed a little. “My father is a police lieutenant and my husband a patrol cop. I know how to fire a gun.”
“Show me.”
She glanced back at him, but then she aimed the gun and fired easily at a bird flying out over the park spread out below them. She thought she heard someone yell as she watched the bird fall to the ground. A crowd of people gathered at the spot where it hit the ground and looked up. Ryder chuckled, drawing her back into the room.
“Perfect.”
“Did you have any doubt?”
“Nope.”
He kissed her again before slipping into his room. He returned with another gun and a box of ammunition. He handed her one and kept the other for himself, reloading before sliding it back into his holster.
“Now we’re as prepared as we could ever be.”
“But we won’t need to be, right?”
“I don’t think so. Our backup should be here within the hour, and they’ll escort us to a private jet for the trip home. And they’ll tip off the cops, and, hopefully, they’ll find him casing either the hotel or your next appearance venue.”
“Will they arrest him?”
“Yes.” Ryder touched his shoulder. “Discharging a firearm in a public place is pretty serious. And you can testify that he was harassing you. It should be a slam dunk.”
“Good.”
He drew her into his arms again. “It’ll be okay.”
But even as he spoke the words, the door to the suite shattered into millions of pieces, forcing them down on their knees.
Chapter 17
Chicago, Illinois
Astoria Hotel
Ryder pushed Kelly behind the couch as he got up and disappeared from her sight. She was shaking, her fingers refusing to close around the gun. She tried to peek around the corner, but she couldn’t see anything. Her heart was pounding painfully in her chest, and she was suddenly overcome with the certainty that she was about to lose her husband after finally getting him back.
“Stop, Dane!”
She stood up and held her hands up where he could see them. Dane Hood was standing just inside the room among the debris of the door, a shot gun the size of one of those mythical elephant guns her father once told her about in his hands. Ryder was crouched against the wall just out of sight of the entryway, waiting to ambush Dane. He waved at her to get back down, but she ignored him, focusing on the crazy man with the big gun.
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