She picked up the pewter frame she’d gotten for her wedding. Evan’s wide grin beamed back at her and she knew without a doubt that he would want her to put closure on her past.
Lucy’s heart literally ached as she finally let the tears flow. She’d loved Evan with her whole heart. She would always love him, but she was going to have to let him go if she wanted her life back.
And Lucy was afraid she’d let the happiest part of her present life walk out the door.
Chapter Fifteen
“This isn’t a sight I thought I’d see.”
Noah sat on the stool next to Sam as Gray handed over two bottles of a local brew.
“I didn’t plan on being here tonight,” Noah confessed. “Emma is at a sleepover, though, so I don’t have much else to do.”
That was a total lie. He’d planned on staying in Lucy’s bed all night. He’d planned on getting to know her more, opening up and explaining how much his feelings had grown. She’d shown him how it was to move on, to help others through grief. Lucy was fabulous with Emma, she was giving to him, and she was so damn sexy he ached knowing he’d never have her again.
Noah had been gone for an hour and he was already wondering if he’d made a colossal mistake. Should he have stayed and talked this out? Maybe, but knowing she didn’t want him in her bed, rather than some guest bed, was hurtful. He wasn’t a guest, damn it. Or maybe he was, but he thought they were so much more.
“Problems with Lucy?” Sam asked, still staring at his bottle.
“We’re just friends.”
A friend he could still taste on his lips. A friend who had worked her way into his heart, into his daughter’s heart.
“Is that so?” Gray asked with a cocky side grin. “She just walked in with Tara and Kate.”
Noah jerked his head over his shoulder, and Gray’s laughter mocked him. Lucy was nowhere in sight, and neither were her friends.
“That’s what I thought,” Gray said, leaning over and resting his forearms on the bar. “So what’s the deal?”
Noah turned back on his stool and reached for his beer. He took a hearty drink, welcoming the wheat flavor and the spices on the back end.
“We attempted more, but that didn’t work out,” he admitted. “That’s all.”
“That’s all.” Sam let out a low laugh. “Nothing with women is ever that simple. Even after a year apart, Tara and I still aren’t simple and, according to the courts, we should be because it’s over.”
Noah had honestly never seen a man so devastated. “Well, Lucy and I have only known each other a short time. We just had a whirlwind...relationship. Now it’s over.”
“Relationship,” Gray repeated. “Whatever you call it, you look like hell.”
Noah picked up his bottle and did a mock salute. “Ironically, I feel like hell.”
The two men tapped their beer bottles to his, then took a swallow. Before any of them could say anything, Gray got called away to a group of females at the other end of the bar. To Noah, they seemed flirty, and he already knew Gray had just enough charm to appease the group of giggling girls. From the looks of them, he surmised they were celebrating a twenty-first birthday.
Noah turned his attention back to Sam. “How long were you married?”
“Not long.” Sam started to peel the label from the bottle. “A couple of years. We married right before Marley was born, which was a mistake. Marrying because of a baby is never the solution.”
Noah wouldn’t know. He’d fallen in love, married, then had a baby. But he would never knock someone else’s life choices. Whatever worked for them.
“Not to pry, but have you told her how you feel?”
Sam laughed. “She’s aware. We got married too soon, weren’t really in love...at least that’s what she says. I was—I am—in love with her.”
Noah’s heart clenched. He couldn’t deny that he was feeling something rather strong for Lucy, too. Love? Hell, he wasn’t sure, but what he felt was so much more than just friendship.
What should he do about it?
Did he wait on her? Did he wait around and see if she was truly ready? At what point did he move on himself?
Who the hell was he kidding? He didn’t want to move on. He’d lost his wife and he’d never thought he’d crawl out from that dark hole. Then he’d met Lucy and there’d been light in his life again. The light was still there, still shining, but he was still alone.
“Fight for her.”
Noah thought he heard Sam wrong. His voice was barely audible over the bass-heavy music pervading the bar.
“If you want Lucy, fight for her,” Sam stated. “She’s amazing. I don’t know your whole story, but... Hell, who am I to give advice on relationships?”
Noah took another pull of his beer. “I lost my wife and our ranch about eight months ago. I have a four-year-old daughter. She’s pretty taken with Lucy. Those two are... They’re so alike and get along like they’re long-lost friends. Lucy is so good with her.”
“Having kids makes things so much more complicated,” Sam stated. “They can also make things so clear, too.”
“I can’t imagine how you deal with an ex and a child.” Noah finished off his beer and set the bottle on the bar. “If you want Tara back, why don’t you just make her see why?”
Sam continued to toy with the label. “We’re pretty complicated. I was offered a job in Nashville. Thinking about taking it and leaving Stonerock.”
Noah leaned his elbows on the bar. “Does Tara know?”
“Not yet. Haven’t decided what I’m doing. Marley is the major factor. I don’t want to make things difficult for her, but staying here isn’t good for me, either.”
“I had to leave Texas, so I get where you’re coming from.” Noah caught Gray’s attention and motioned him over for another beer. “You have to do what’s best to keep moving forward.”
Sam let out a laugh. “I just hang here to talk with Gray. I’m not really some sappy drunk who’s lost all hope.”
“Didn’t think you were.”
“Others do,” he replied. “Not that I care. Gray is a good friend and I figure if I can hang here and give him my business, it’s a win-win.”
Gray slid another beer across to Noah. “You ladies done sharing life stories?”
“For now,” Noah told him.
“You want to know how to get to Lucy?” Gray asked. “She’s a simple person, really. Nobody has actually tried to do things for her. She’s always putting herself out there for everyone else.”
Noah nodded. That was the crux of the entire situation. She wanted to be the one person for everyone else, but couldn’t let one person be everything for her.
“I’ve already figured that out,” Noah replied. “Trying to get that woman to see that is like beating my head against the wall.”
Gray rested his palms on the bar top. “Don’t give up on her.”
Noah didn’t say anything. What could he say? He wasn’t the one who had given up. He’d just gotten to the point where he truly wanted to try a relationship and expose his most vulnerable side and Lucy hadn’t removed that steel barrier she’d had in place for the past two years.
At this point all he could do was move on with the life he’d started here with Emma. Seeing Lucy at work would hurt. Hearing her voice over the radio would be crushing. But he couldn’t make her see that they could heal each other. She had to find that resolution herself.
* * *
“We have a report of an armed robbery in progress at Stonerock Bank.”
He’d been right. Hearing Lucy’s voice over his radio was gut-wrenching. Noah had given her a brief hello when he’d come into work; that had been the extent of their conversation. For the past week they’d been cordial, just like coworkers should be. But now they
weren’t even acting like coworkers. They had back-tracked to that awkward stage, almost like strangers.
They weren’t strangers, though. They had been lovers. They knew each other’s secrets, their fears.
Noah had to admit it. The woman had him tied up in knots. But right now, with her voice over his radio, he had a robbery to focus on.
“One report from a teller says there’s only one man, but she says he’s armed,” Lucy went on. “She was in the bathroom when she heard him come in and demand money, so she hasn’t seen a weapon. She’s locked herself in and her phone is still on. I can hear the suspect, but I can’t make out what he’s saying.”
Adrenaline pumping, Noah put on his lights and siren. If a perp was wielding a gun or any weapon, there were people in danger. Noah only hoped the perp wasn’t under the influence of something, because guns and drugs made for a dangerous combo. He’d only dealt with a handful of armed robberies in Texas, but thankfully they’d all ended peacefully.
Noah pulled into the lot at the same time McCoy pulled in. This was the early bank that opened at seven to get businesses started for the day. Noah’s shift only had an hour left, but he already knew this situation would take longer than sixty minutes.
“I’m on the scene,” McCoy checked in through the radio.
“I’m here, too,” Noah added. “The blinds are still closed.”
“The teller said she thinks he forced his way in with one of the workers,” Lucy informed them. “The lobby isn’t open yet.”
That would make sense. Get in when all of the nightly bank bags were waiting for the morning deposits.
Noah surveyed the parking lot, looking for an accomplice or a getaway car. The sun was barely on the horizon, but he didn’t see any unusual cars. Just a couple parked in the employee section. Still, he scanned the street. The rest of the nearby businesses were still closed, for which he was grateful. If this robber ran out with a gun, at least the streets were still bare.
Movement in the window caught Noah’s eye. “The suspect just shifted the blinds,” he said in his radio. “He is holding a gun.”
“I’ve got more units en route,” Lucy informed him. “Be careful.”
She’d never said those words before and Noah knew full well she was talking directly to him. He also knew McCoy and all the other units had heard her, but she’d let him know she cared. There might be hope.
Noah didn’t reply. He needed to stay in this moment and make sure all those inside got out unharmed.
While McCoy called the bank hoping to get an answer, Noah kept watch on the side of the building. From this angle he could see the back and front entrances and he’d know if either of the doors opened. No movement made him nervous. That meant the gunman was still in the bank. Hopefully the suspect wouldn’t catch the teller in the bathroom. They needed her eyes on the inside. She was their only lifeline between him and Lucy.
The back door eased slightly open and Noah remained behind the open door of his patrol car. His gun in hand and resting on the top of the door, he kept his eyes focused on the back. He could see McCoy get into position from the side, as well. Another unit pulled up by McCoy, instantly getting ready.
Noah knew Lucy was on the other end of that radio, but the line was completely silent. Right now, time seemed to stand still as he waited to see who had opened that door.
“Movement in the back,” McCoy stated into the radio.
The door opened farther at the same time that Captain St. John pulled in beside Noah. There were several officers on the scene, but right now they were still at the mercy of the suspect.
“I’ve lost contact with the teller,” Lucy stated.
Noah prayed whoever was on the other side of that door was a hostage trying to escape. Just as the thought crossed his mind, he saw an arm snake around the door, then he heard shots fired...and his world went black.
Chapter Sixteen
Lucy stared at the screens ahead of her and held her breath as she listened to the radio. Gunshots were fired at the scene. Her heart stopped as she waited on the officers to check in.
“I’m sure everything is all right,” Carla said as she patted Lucy’s shoulder.
Lucy and the other dispatcher had worked this end of a robbery before, but Lucy had never felt more fear and helplessness than she did now. Her shift ended an hour ago. She could leave and turn it over to the day shift, but she couldn’t leave. Carla wasn’t leaving her, either.
Lucy gripped her hands in her lap. She willed the phone to ring from the teller; she prayed she’d hear Noah’s voice over the radio. She wanted this entire situation to come to an end with Noah safe. The nerves swirling around in her stomach were so much more than she could bear.
She couldn’t go through this again. She couldn’t lose a man she cared about. Lucy bit on her bottom lip, willing the burn in her throat and eyes to subside. Now more than ever she needed to hold it together.
An image of Emma flashed through Lucy’s mind. There was no way fate would be that cruel to steal both parents from her life.
“Officer down.”
The report over the radio had Lucy gripping the mic on the desk. “Repeat,” she demanded, desperately hoping she’d heard wrong.
“Officer Spencer is down. The suspect is down, too. We’ll need two squads on the scene,” Captain St. John confirmed. “All hostages are okay. We’ve secured the area, but will let the EMTs through.”
“What’s the status on Spencer?” Carla asked, reaching across the desk to hold Lucy’s hand.
She was too stunned, almost sick to her stomach, to think, much less to speak.
“He’s coming around,” McCoy chimed in. “He hit his head. He needs to be checked out.”
Hit his head? Lucy didn’t know whether to be furious at how they’d scared her or relieved that he hadn’t been shot.
“EMTs should be arriving on the scene in three minutes,” Carla told them.
At least one of them was able to still do their job. Lucy wasn’t sure she would’ve been able to do this on her own.
Time seemed to speed up a little more now that they knew what was going on and the situation had been resolved. Once the EMTs reached the scene and triaged the injured, Lucy got a report from the captain. The suspect was getting checked out after getting grazed on the arm with a bullet. He’d be accompanied to the hospital by two officers. More important, Noah would be fine, though he too was being transported to the hospital to get checked out.
He apparently had fired the shot that struck the suspect. When the suspect had fired back, Noah had ducked and lost his balance, hitting his head on the curb behind him.
Relief flooded her, yet she still had an overwhelming desire to see him for herself. She wanted to go to the hospital and be with him, then offer him a ride home. But she didn’t know if he even wanted to see her. Earlier, before all this went down, she’d told him to be careful, but he hadn’t replied. Not that it would’ve been professional, but she’d hoped he would’ve said something.
In the end, Lucy went home. She was too wound up to sleep, she had no schoolwork to do at the moment, and the meetings were already planned out for the next three weeks.
Which left her alone with her thoughts. Not a good place to be. She stripped from the clothes she’d worn to work and pulled on a pair of yoga pants and a sweatshirt. She’d end up at the barns tending to the horses in a bit. Since she’d gotten in late her stomach was growling, so she needed to grab a bite first.
As she sat on the bed and pulled on her socks, she glanced to the photo on her night table. There was nothing wrong with keeping pictures, and there was nothing wrong with having them on display. But Lucy completely saw where Noah was coming from. She understood his frustrations.
But Lucy had come to her own understanding earlier. She’d been right not to
let Noah deeper into her world. When she’d been on the other end of that robbery, she had been close to a panic attack. She’d only known fear like that one other time. She couldn’t go through that every day of her life. How was that any way to live?
Noah had been right to leave last week. He’d been right to walk away before they grew even closer with the bond they’d started. The sooner she could get out of working with him, the better off she’d be. Lucy needed to break free from Noah. She needed to not have that fear of loving someone all the while knowing he was risking his life every single day.
Leaving the picture where it was, Lucy headed to the kitchen where her muck boots were waiting by the back door. Surely once she cared for the horses she’d be tired enough to fall into a mind-numbing sleep. She needed to do something to work off her energy and carry her away from her thoughts.
But every single thought circled back to Noah. Once upon a time her mind only held Evan. He was still there, but Noah occupied the space in the forefront now. That was how Lucy knew she’d moved on. Unfortunately, she’d moved on with yet another man who took risks.
Lucy stepped into the barn, the sunshine beaming in through the open ends. As she stepped up to pet Gunner, she couldn’t help but smile at the thought of Emma painting her horse back in Texas.
The sound of a vehicle pulling up her driveway had Lucy stepping to the entrance to the stables. That black truck she’d become so familiar with pulled in like it had so many times before.
To see him perfectly fine as he stepped from his truck, still wearing his uniform, did so much to her. He was here, as if just a few hours ago his life hadn’t been in danger. Noah may be able to live like that, but she simply couldn’t.
Lucy stayed in the doorway, afraid if she got too close she’d crumble and go against the one rule she should’ve stuck to all along. The small white bandage stood out against the tanned skin of his face, looking like the perfect visual reminder that a man with a risky job was not for her. No matter how much her heart told her otherwise.
The Cowboy's Second-Chance Family Page 14
