by Carol Lynne
A large, tan, mountain lion ambled slowly up the stairs and right for Mica. He tensed, not sure how aware Jarek was while in his cougar skin. Jarek lowered his head and butted it playfully against Mica’s hand.
Mica looked at Daniel. “What does he want?”
Daniel giggled. “Ummm, I think he wants you to pet him.”
“Is that natural?”
“Perfectly,” Daniel said with a nod.
Mica opened his hand and rested it on top of Jarek’s head. The fur was surprisingly soft under his fingers. Jarek moved his head so Mica was scratching him behind the ears. Mica realized how much he was enjoying himself. The simple action of giving the big cat pleasure brought him pleasure as well. It made him remember the way Jarek had touched his arm when they were driving up the mountain. Did Jarek feel the same kind of pleasure as he was experiencing at the moment?
“Jarek, honey, why don’t you go get dressed and the two of you can join us for supper.”
“Dressed? I thought your clothes shifted with you?” Mica asked.
“They do, if you’re wearing them in the first place. I’m sure Jarek was still naked when he shifted,” Daniel informed him.
Mica wasn’t the only one uneasy about Daniel’s admission. Both Hakan and Ryker stiffened. “The two of you were naked together?”
“It’s not the first time. You forget we spent many hours naked and trapped in cages side by side,” Daniel reminded his men.
“Not the same,” Hakan spat.
“You’re right it wasn’t. I never really got a good look at Jarek in the cage, but I sure did in the healing spring. And damn!”
Hakan and Ryker tackled Daniel at the same time, smashing his much smaller body between them. “You’re ours,” both Guardians said in unison.
Daniel giggled and glanced at Mica. “I don’t know why they’re making such a big deal. They knew when I took Jarek to the spring we’d have to disrobe.”
“Didn’t think about it at the time,” Hakan growled.
Mica gave Jarek one last scratch behind the ear. “You’d better go shift and dress.”
Jarek’s tongue laved Mica’s hand before slinking from the porch and disappearing into the trees. Mica stared at his hand. He’d learned enough about animals to know what Jarek had just done was sort of a kiss. It was the second one he’d received from the small shifter if the one on the cheek in the truck was included.
A cougar broke out of the trees and straight for the porch, surprising Mica. “I thought Daniel told you to shift.”
Daniel stood and walked to the top of the steps. “It’s not Jarek, it’s Maquay.”
Mica’s skin prickled. He’d only met the self-proclaimed cougar Alpha on a few occasions and didn’t care for him. He jumped out of his chair and went to stand beside Daniel in case he was needed.
At the foot of the steps, Maquay shifted. “Excuse the intrusion, Daniel, but I’ve been told one of my charges is here.”
Daniel nodded. “Yes. Jarek’s here. He’ll be staying for dinner.”
Maquay dipped his head slightly. “With your permission, I’d like to take him back with me. We have some rules we need to go over before he’s allowed to settle in.”
Mica could tell the cougar shifter had offended Daniel by the stiffening of the coyote shifter’s spine.
“Jarek is allowed to settle in however he sees fit. If he wants to stay for dinner, that’s his choice, not yours.” Daniel punctuated his statement by traveling down two steps until he was eye to eye with Maquay.
Maquay dismissed Jarek with a flick of his hand and regarded Hakan and Ryker. “Does this coyote shifter also rule over the cougars?”
Ryker stood and moved forward. “Daniel was chosen to bridge the shifters of earth and sky. You will show him the same respect you show me or Hakan.”
Maquay’s eyes narrowed. “Very well. Have Jarek come by my house after his dinner.”
Mica could tell by the growl in Maquay’s voice that the shifter was beyond angry. He hoped the cougar Alpha didn’t take it out on Jarek. If Maquay even attempted such an act, he’d have Mica to deal with.
* * * *
Jarek stood with his hands clasped behind his back. His new Alpha hadn’t asked him to sit, so he stood just inside the door as Maquay paced the small living room, running down a list of rules.
“And last but not least, you should refrain from interaction with shifters outside our species.”
“What?” Jarek butted in. “Why can’t I talk to the friends I’ve already made?”
“Because cougars and coyotes are not friends in nature.”
“But we’re not in nature. This is Refuge…”
“Silence.” Maquay rushed forward, wrapping a hand around Jarek’s neck. “You will not question me, unless you believe you are strong enough to fight for my position.”
Jarek swallowed. He had no desire to become Alpha, but he didn’t want to live the life Maquay was laying out for him.
“If you attempt to go to your friends on the hill, you will be sorry. Accidents happen even at Refuge. Am I understood?” Maquay asked.
Jarek nodded, lowering his head. His dreams had been foolish. How many years had he yearned of living a non-solitary life? Now it seemed he was allowed friends, as long as they were of his species. “Can I go?”
“You will be housed in the dorm with the rest of the cat shifters. Bly will show you to your room.”
A handsome man with long blond hair stepped forward and opened the door. Jarek turned and walked out of the Alpha’s house. He followed Bly across the field toward the large building he would have to stay in until his home was built.
“Don’t let the rules get to you.”
Jarek glanced at the tall man walking beside him. “I don’t understand them. Why did Maquay come to Refuge if he doesn’t want to live with the other shifter species?”
Bly said nothing for several moments. “His pain and anger fills him to the point of madness at times. It’s impossible for Maquay to openly be with the one he truly loves.
“I’m sorry, but he needs to get over it.”
“Easy for you to say, you’ve never had to hide the one you loved.”
“You’re right. I’ve never loved at all. Have you?”
Bly made a sound in his throat and picked up his pace. “I’m not allowed to talk about it.”
Jarek felt a world of hurt in the shifter’s voice. He didn’t ask any more questions, afraid of making Bly feel worse. He continued to follow the cougar shifter to the third floor of the hotel-turned-dorm.
Bly handed Jarek the key after unlocking the door. “You’ll have the room to yourself for now, but that may change if more shifters arrive.”
“Oh, I won’t be here long. Ryker has promised to build me a house.”
It appeared Bly wanted to say something, but he shook his head. “I’ll take you shopping at the supply barn after breakfast to get you more clothes.”
With a deep breath, Jarek turned the handle and opened the door. His first impression was the same as his second, depressing. The room had been stripped of any decoration. There was a small bed, desk and chair. This is it? His heart plummeted as he entered the room.
Jarek ran a hand over the heavy wool blanket on the bed. It wasn’t quite what he’d been hoping for in his first human home, but at least he had a real bed. He turned and sat down. He was surprised it didn’t have as much give as he’d have thought, but figured, like everything else, his dreams had romanticized living as a human.
He stood and walked toward the large window. At least he’d be able to see outside. From his position on the third floor, Jarek felt he was once again on his mountain. He rested his forehead against the glass, suddenly homesick.
Movement below caught his attention. Jarek was surprised to see Mica step out of the shadows to stare up at him. Jarek held up his hand in acknowledgement and smiled. The words his Alpha spoke came back to him. He dropped both his hand and his smile. It didn’t matter how muc
h he wanted the stone man, Jarek knew it was forbidden.
He continued to look down at Mica for several moments before turning away. He undressed quickly and switched off the light before crawling under the covers. Jarek sighed as he rolled to his side. For as many years as he could remember, he’d jerked off before falling to sleep, but the coldness to his new home left him without an ounce of motivation.
Maybe things would be better once he got to know some of the other cougar shifters.
Chapter Two
Mica knocked on the door and waited. He knew he was overstepping his position by showing up at The Guardians’ home unannounced, but he was worried. He tapped his fingers against his thigh, his nerves threatening to overwhelm him.
Six separate times in the previous month, he’d had to see Dr. Whitehall in emergency sessions in addition to his regularly scheduled appointments.
The front door opened and Daniel smiled up at him. “Mica. To what do I owe the pleasure of your unexpected visit?”
“I’m sorry. I know I’m supposed to call first, but I need to talk to you.”
Daniel waved away Mica’s apology and led him inside. The weather was turning colder, and sitting on the porch was no longer an option. “Have a seat.”
Mica settled his large frame on the deep sofa. “I’m worried about Jarek.”
“Jarek? Why, what’s happened.”
“I don’t know, but he’s different than he was when he first came. I catch him crying sometimes, and I’ve seen him sleeping outside in his shifted form.”
Daniel’s expression turned serious. “Have you been keeping an eye out for him like I asked?”
Mica nodded. “As much as I can.” He felt his chest tighten. “I’ve seen him with the others, and I think you were right to be worried. They don’t seem to like him much.”
He felt his eyes sting and fisted his hands. Damn. His emotions were all over the place lately. No matter how hard he tried, the sadness threatened to overwhelm him most days. “One time, I heard some of the shifters teasing him. I could tell he was really upset, but when I tried to step in to stop it, he got angry and ran away.”
Daniel shook his head. “I’m glad you came to me. The thought of Jarek being unhappy breaks my heart. He was so excited to come here.”
“Maybe things will get better once he moves out of that awful place he’s living in and into his new house.”
“He told me he’d changed his mind about the house. He said he was happy in the dorm.”
Mica knew that wasn’t true. He didn’t know why he’d changed his mind about the house, unless he wasn’t planning on staying long enough to see it finished. “Do you think he’ll run away?”
“What?”
Mica shrugged. “Maybe he’s changed his mind and has decided he likes living in his cougar skin better. If that’s the case, I wouldn’t put it past him to move up to the mountains.”
Daniel stood and began pacing the room. “None of this makes sense. It’s like we’re talking about a different person than the one I spent time with.” Daniel stopped and put his hands on his hips. “If you see him, can you ask him to come here for dinner? I don’t know that it’ll do any good, but we have to try something.”
Mica stood. “I’ll tell him.”
“I’m going to invite Jon, and I’d appreciate it if you’d come as well.”
“Me?”
“Yes.”
As much as the prospect thrilled him, Mica was afraid. Jarek had acted like he no longer wanted him around. What would Jarek say if he knew Mica had also been invited? “I’ll tell him.”
“Good.” Daniel reached up and put a hand on Mica’s arm. “No matter what is going on with Jarek, I want you to know he likes you.”
Mica had thought maybe he had to, but now he knew differently. He covered Daniel’s hand with his own. “Thanks, but either he’s changed his mind, or he’s discovered I’m not good enough because I can’t even get him to talk to me anymore.”
Daniel shook his head. “No. He hasn’t changed his mind. You don’t just up and change what’s in your heart, and believe me, I saw his feelings clearly. He really does like you. Whatever it is that’s troubling him, must be responsible for the changes in him.”
“I hope you’re right,” Mica mumbled. That was as far as he’d let himself go in declaring his own interest in the cougar shifter.
“So go find him, and I’ll call Dr. Whitehall, Hakan and Ryker.”
“Okay.” Mica felt better as he left the house and climbed into the security truck he’d been assigned.
The drive down the hill was much easier than the one up. He couldn’t wipe the smile from his face at the thought of the handsome shifter liking him. Over the past few weeks, he’d convinced himself he’d read Jarek wrong in the beginning.
It just didn’t make sense how fast the man’s attitude towards Refuge had changed. One minute they were laughing and eating dinner with Daniel, Hakan and Ryker, and the next morning…nothing.
Although it wasn’t his place, he’d thought of talking to Daniel about Maquay. Since the afternoon on Daniel’s porch, he’d noticed the Alpha shifter watching him with malice in his gaze. It was also after his meeting with Maquay that Jarek started to change.
The news about Jarek no longer wanting a house was the final straw. Jarek had talked about nothing else. No way would he prefer the cougar floor in the dorm to his own place. Mica had seen what Maquay had done to the once attractive rooms. They were no more than prison cells since the Alpha’s makeover.
Mica drove to the supply barn where Jarek had been given a job unpacking boxes for the store. He parked in the small lot next to one of the community trucks. Unlike the vehicles available for anyone to use, Mica took the keys out of the security truck and stuck them in his pocket.
He entered the barn through the side door, hoping to avoid as many people as possible. Although it was getting better, many of the shifters still treated Mica and his guards like they were freaks, always staring. In his present mood, Mica knew it was best to maintain a low profile.
Jarek wasn’t hard to find, he seemed to be the only one working. Mica glanced at his watch. He hadn’t realized it was lunchtime. He wondered why Jarek wasn’t eating. “Hey.”
With a stack of toilet paper in his arms, Jarek glanced over his shoulder. “Hi.” He loaded the stack onto a cart before turning to fully face Mica. “What’re you doing here?”
Mica took several steps forward. He noticed the dark smudges under Jarek’s eyes. “Daniel asked me to invite you up to his house for dinner later.”
A spark lit in Jarek’s amber eyes before quickly disappearing. “Oh. Uh, I can’t. Will you tell him?”
Mica knew from Jarek’s body language it was hurting him to turn down the invitation. So why was he? “Sorry. Unless you can give me a good reason to give Daniel, you can do your own dirty work. He misses you.” Mica’s gaze dropped to the floor. “We all do.”
“I miss you guys, too,” Jarek whispered. “But I just can’t.”
“Can’t or won’t.”
Jarek’s gaze quickly scanned their surroundings. “Can’t. Now, if you’ll excuse me.”
Mica watched Jarek’s back as the shifter pushed the cart toward the front of the building. Can’t? That implied someone wouldn’t let him. “Maquay,” Mica spat out.
* * * *
Although the dorm was almost three miles from the supply barn, Jarek chose to walk home instead of riding with the other shifters. He flipped the collar of his coat up against the chill and cut through the woods.
He’d learned the hard way what could happen if you walked along the road. He was an easy target for the passing shifters. Not that any of them had tried to run him down, but they seemed to enjoy shouting hurtful things at him. The previous week, he’d even been hit in the head by a half-full beer can as a group had driven by.
He hated his new life. With every passing day, he hated it more and more. There were times he wished he’d have d
ied at the hands of The Hunters. At least then, the other shifters would have thought of him as a hero. Instead, Maquay had made his feelings toward Jarek known to the rest of the cougar shifters. He’d made the mistake of being seen with Mica the third day he’d lived at Refuge. Since then, he’d been treated like shit by the shifters, and since they were the only ones, he was allowed to socialize with, it made for a lonely existence.
He rubbed his side where Maquay had branded him with the letter T, for traitor. Although his shifting abilities had gone a long way in healing the burn, Maquay had sprinkled the tortured skin with gold dust from the mountains of his ancestors. Like all shifters, cougars had a weakness, and theirs was the gold the prospectors wanted access to.
According to his Alpha, he’d receive another for every time he was spotted socializing with another species. After five brands, he’d be killed. The more he thought about it, the less he cared.
Out of his peripheral vision, he spotted a small brown coyote running toward him. Jarek stopped and squeezed his eyes shut. As deep in the trees as they were, it was unlikely Maquay or one of his men would catch Jarek talking to Daniel. Jarek just had to make sure Daniel didn’t touch him. The last thing he needed was to come away from the meeting smelling like coyote.
He waited for Daniel to shift before greeting his old friend. “Hi.”
“Hey.” Daniel held out his arms, but Jarek stepped back. “What’s going on, Jarek?”
Jarek shook his head. “I’ve just come from work. I’m filthy.”
Daniel’s head tilted to the side. “You know that doesn’t matter to me. Now tell me the real reason.”
Instead of answering Daniel’s question, Jarek switched gears. “I’m sorry I can’t come to dinner. I have other plans.”
“Really? What? Because I hope they include eating. It looks like you’ve lost a lot of weight since you got here.”
Jarek shrugged. “What can I say? I’m used to spending the majority of my days sleeping. Now I’ve got a job. I was bound to lose weight with all the extra calories I’m burning.”
