Until, apparently, now.
Or maybe it was just him. Campbell was an attractive man—that she had noticed right off. It had angered her the moment she’d seen him, because demons always seemed to double as male models. Sure, she’d beaten a few faces only a mother could love, but unattractive demons seemed to be the exception rather than the rule.
Campbell wasn’t just sexy—he was out of this world, so much so that he looked unreal.
She wanted him, and that terrified her.
And she was still staring at his cock.
Varina started and shook her head, moving the rest of the way away from him. The air stung with cold, and the places where her skin had been against his tingled.
Would it be so bad, giving in? Waking him up and telling him she’d changed her mind?
She sighed again as she eased herself to the ground.
No. That was a bad idea for numerous reasons, not the least of which was that she still hadn’t received confirmation he was clean. Though she was inclined to believe him based on what she’d observed through getting to know him, the need for confirmation provided a handy excuse she wasn’t quite ready to forgo.
Beyond that, though, was the knowledge that it would be different if they had sex again. Different from before, when they’d come together in a fury. In a clothes-tearing frenzy. Where they had forgotten where they were, where they hadn’t even known each other’s names.
Now she knew more than his name. And she liked it. She liked him, and that terrified her.
Varina wasn’t ready to confront this yet. Not first thing in the morning, and not with him mostly naked. Moreover, she had no way of knowing what he thought about last night—if he’d only climbed into bed to humor her, if he’d expected sex and resented the fact that he hadn’t gotten any, or if he’d act differently now that they had literally slept in each other’s arms.
The best answer at the moment seemed to be breakfast.
Varina managed to make it downstairs and get eggs in the frying pan without disturbing him. Mount Zion was known for its telltale whines and creaks, some of which were loud enough to rouse Rip Van Winkle. However, it wasn’t until she added bacon to the mix that she felt a pair of eyes on her.
She looked to the kitchen doorway, where Campbell stood. He was still shirtless, but had thankfully decided to don a pair of jeans before joining the waking world. When their eyes connected, something flashed across his face. She thought. It might have been her imagination. Or wishful thinking.
“Eggs and bacon all right?” she asked, shifting her attention back to the task at hand.
“When are eggs and bacon not all right?”
She still felt his gaze on her, but didn’t turn to acknowledge it. She wasn’t sure where to begin, and until she had that figured out, it seemed best to pretend nothing had changed. Because, in reality, nothing had.
And everything had.
Varina flipped the bacon. The familiar crackle filled the air, accompanied by scents universally identifiable. She busied herself a few minutes, but by the time she had moved onto plating, she knew she wouldn’t be able to ignore last night. Ignoring things was not her forte, never had been. With everyone she’d met, she’d been nothing but straightforward. There was no reason to stop that now.
Campbell had poured them each a glass of orange juice and set utensils on the island. There wasn’t a convenient dining area anywhere in the house.
Varina handed him his plate. “Salt’s in the cabinet over the microwave.”
His brow furrowed.
“For the eggs.” Then, because she couldn’t help herself, she blurted, “Thank you for last night.”
“You’re thanking me with salt?”
“No. Well, you can have salt if you want salt, but I was…” She swallowed. “Thank you for staying with me after what happened.”
Campbell studied her a long moment before nodding, though he didn’t bother to hide his confusion. “You’re welcome.” After setting his plate aside, he moved toward the cabinet she’d indicated and grabbed the salt.
And that was it.
He didn’t say anything else. About any of it.
Which disappointed her and frustrated her at the same time—mostly because she couldn’t understand what in the world she had to be disappointed about. It wasn’t as though he’d given her a kidney—he’d crashed in her room instead of the one she’d put him in. And yes, she had noticed that the screams hadn’t followed him from his room to hers, but that didn’t mean anything. It certainly didn’t mean they had to have a long conversation about their impromptu sleepover.
That might be what normal people did, but she’d never been normal people.
She wasn’t about to start now.
Campbell was used to being an ass. He just wasn’t used to feeling bad about it.
Today, he was being an ass. At least he could tell that was what he was giving off. He couldn’t seem to help himself. Being near Varina after waking up with her scent all over him had fucked with his head. He already knew he liked her more than he should. More than he had a right to, and his mind seemed constantly split. There was what he was supposed to be doing here and what he was actually doing, and those two things kept getting confused.
He’d slept better last night than any night since Rome. Possibly any night ever, and he knew it was because of her. The second he’d closed his eyes, her warmth had washed over him, flooding him, calming him. The demons that tried to pull him back to the Colosseum had seemingly taken her presence as enough of a threat to leave him alone. He’d awakened calm and refreshed—two things he’d almost forgotten were possible.
He didn’t know what to do about it—about her. Because at the end of the day, he was still the asshole who was here to do a job. He was the asshole who was lying to her. Pretending to be something he wasn’t just so he had an excuse to get close.
Goddammit, why did that bother him so much?
Campbell didn’t know, and today he found it impossible to ignore. Therefore he did his best to ignore her. After breakfast, Varina made her way back to the third floor to resume her treasure hunt through her father’s things. It was the perfect opportunity to get some air.
So he left—left the house, took Dante’s Oldsmobile a respectable ways up the road before steering it into a patch of woods thick enough to evade notice. Not that Campbell expected Varina to come after him, but he felt it smarter to potentially damage his in-law’s car than face the wrath of the strongest woman he knew.
Once the car was safely concealed, he considered his options. There weren’t that many. He didn’t want solitude, as that would leave him alone with his increasingly confusing thoughts. In the end, he decided Portland was the safest territory.
Campbell closed his eyes and felt the world rotate around him. When he opened them, the Louisiana live oaks and oppressive humidity had been exchanged for cool air and an overcast sky.
And Gula’s glaring face.
“What the hell are you doing here?”
Campbell shrugged and stuck his hands in his pockets.
“I mean it,” Gula said. “It’s broad daylight and this is a public sidewalk. Think before you pop.”
“Worst slogan ever.”
Gula blinked at him. “Are you drunk?”
He snickered at that. If only.
That thought might as well have been shouted for the way Gula’s stare intensified. His brother took a step forward, his mouth tugged into a worried frown. “Seriously, Cam, what the hell?”
Campbell shrugged, doing his best to look nonchalant. “I just needed a break, okay?”
“So you came here.”
“Seemed as good a place as any.”
The suspicion in Gula’s eyes deepened. “Is your assignment over?”
“No.”
“Didn’t think so. That’d be some kind of new record.” Gula arched an eyebrow. “How’s it going with your special lady friend? She roast your nuts off yet?”
&nb
sp; “No. I’ve managed to go these last couple days without her finding out.” He hesitated, then added, “I don’t feel good about it, though. This has… Everything feels off.”
That was perhaps the most he’d ever opened up. A fact that was, judging by Gula’s expression, not lost on his brother. Campbell inhaled and shifted, a funny warm feeling ballooning in his chest.
“Wow,” Gula said.
“Yeah.”
“You like this girl.”
“It’s… I dunno.”
“No, you have actual feelings.”
Campbell flinched. “Are you playing matchmaker now?”
“I don’t think I need to. I’ve never seen you like this.”
“I’m not like anything.”
“Oh, I think you are. And there’s no harm in that. It’s in the water. Figure it’s just a matter of time before you, me, and Ace get serious about a woman.”
At that, the burning discomfort throbbing beneath his skin subsided. Campbell let out a breath. “Hopefully not the same one.” He tried for a grin, but then his thoughts turned to Varina. The heaviness pulsed, then exploded.
If either Gula or Ace so much as sniffed her hair, he’d rip out their lungs.
“Yep.”
Campbell looked up. “What?”
“You have that look.”
“What look?”
“The same look Ira gets whenever anyone with a dick is within twenty feet of Cassie.”
He rolled his eyes. “Don’t fucking compare me to Ira, man. I’m not rabid.”
Gula brought his hands up. “It’s a fair observation. And hey…having actual feelings isn’t the end of the world.” He paused. “And we’d know, ’cause we’ve been there.”
Campbell snickered, but didn’t reply. He’d already shared more than he’d intended, and no matter what might have changed for him these last couple days, he doubted he would ever be the sort of guy to open up about his feelings. That shit was more up Gula’s alley.
Then again, he didn’t know himself anymore. There was the man Campbell had been before Lilith and the one he was now. The Campbell of Before had been a private guy. Relationships were brief and not discussed. Feelings were to be internalized and handled quickly. Weakness, real or perceived, was to be concealed at all costs. At no point could anyone know what went on in his head, no matter how mundane the thoughts. Letting a person that close meant being vulnerable, and Campbell didn’t do vulnerable.
But with Varina…
With Varina, none of his old rules seemed to matter. And that had him terrified.
Gula tilted his head. “You really went off there. It must be serious.”
He didn’t respond, couldn’t. Just swallowed and looked away.
His brother took his silence as answer enough, and must have pitied him, for he changed the subject. “She know you’ve gone?”
“No. I kinda just took off.”
Gula laughed. “I could be wrong, but I’ve heard women don’t like that very much.”
“She’ll understand. She’s…” Campbell looked back at him, struggling to find the right words. “I just needed to get away for a while. Clear my head. I can’t go to my bar anymore because it…” Because he’d fucked Varina in the bathroom and he was pretty sure he’d be treating himself to an embarrassing public hard-on if he dropped in. “Because of what happened last time. And I don’t wanna go home right now.”
At that, Gula’s expression softened. “Yeah. I understand.”
“I knew you would.”
“But this… I’m in no position to hand out advice on a woman you actually care about.”
“Did I ask?”
“I’m just saying… I don’t know what that’s like, myself.” Gula waved a hand. “The whole…feelings thing. Relationships and all that jazz. I honestly hadn’t thought much about things like that until Ava resigned. Then Luxi, Invi, and Ira all found love and… Well, I dunno. It gets a guy thinking, is all.”
Again, Campbell didn’t reply. Instead he thought of Varina. Her quiet strength. Her courage. How he had practically felt his skin cells straining toward her the night before as she’d settled in beside him. How her scent calmed the screaming in his head. How she chased the nightmares away.
“So…do you?” Gula asked a second later.
“Do I what?”
”Think you love this girl?”
For a moment, Campbell forgot how to breathe. He wasn’t sure he knew what love was beyond what he felt for his siblings. The thought of willingly extending the circle of people he cared about terrified him. Love gave people power, and power wasn’t something Campbell wanted to hand over. He’d seen what it could do—seen how willingly his brother and sisters had provided Lilith the ability to end the world, simply by holding hostage the one they loved.
Campbell wouldn’t have offered the world to protect his siblings. He’d mourn for them, but he’d recognized the world was more valuable.
If Lilith had held Varina as the bargaining chip…
The falling sensation returned.
Gula clapped Campbell on the shoulder and gave him a conciliatory shake, then began humming “Another One Bites The Dust”.
Campbell made a face and shook off his brother’s hand. “Fuck you.”
He just smirked and added a dance to the humming.
“You look ridiculous.”
Gula shrugged and continued dancing, his moves becoming more outrageous, until Campbell had no choice but to laugh. And that felt good. He hadn’t laughed in a long time.
Finally, after Gula had exhausted his repository of dance moves and cycled through the chorus at least a half a dozen times, he swayed to a stop and favored Campbell with a serious look. “I know this has to be wigging you out, but…if you think you found someone, be open to it. You deserve happiness.”
The warmth returned, invasive and uncomfortable. No matter what might be changing for him, Campbell doubted he’d ever be able to speak freely when it came to things he felt.
Instead, he deflected. “You’re a regular Dr. Phil, you know that?”
“Flattery will get you nowhere.”
Campbell rubbed at the back of his neck. “I better head back,” he said. “Varina’ll have noticed I took off by now and—”
Gula started humming again.
“Bite me.”
But in spite of himself, and to his great surprise, Campbell found that talking with his brother had given him things to think about. Things that were frightening, but altogether different from the dark that kept trying to pull him under. By the time he arrived back at the Oldsmobile, the weight in his gut was lighter.
No matter that labeling his feelings for Varina seemed presumptuous—he knew that whatever it was couldn’t be ignored. He might not be ready to make the leap Gula had suggested, but he accepted there was something beyond his need to touch Varina. Beyond the way his body reacted to her proximity. Something that rebelled at the lies he’d told her, and the ones yet to come.
Campbell was so occupied with the unknowns in his world that he didn’t notice the package seated next to him until he had pulled the vehicle back to Mount Zion.
The collection box, accompanied with a yellow sticky note which read, Handle with care. You know what happens if this goes sideways. – Pixley.
Campbell drew in a deep breath, then released it. Like all the others he’d seen, the collection box was on the small side. He thought it’d be bigger for some reason. More important, considering its purpose. Not a run-of-the-mill collection box, but one capable of holding a Hell Demon.
Now all he had to do was wait until he knew Legion was near. Damn, if he’d had this sooner, he could have captured the fucker during its parlor trick with the mirror. The assignment would be over.
But so would his time with Varina, and he wasn’t ready for that.
Campbell tucked the box under his arm and kicked the car door open. When he looked toward the house, though, he stilled.
The box
wasn’t the only thing he’d neglected to notice.
“Didn’t we kick you outta here yesterday?” he called before he could stop himself.
Lina had been practically racing for the porch, like she hoped to get there before she could be interrupted. For a blink, he thought she’d ignore him, but she didn’t. Instead, she drew to a stop and straightened with the grace of a performer assuming a character. When she turned to look at him, that terrible, faux smile was stretched across her face.
“Why hello,” she said. “Forgive me, I do not recall your name.”
Campbell set toward her with hard, angry strides. “I think Varina made it pretty clear she doesn’t want you here.”
The saccharine smile stretched wider, a somewhat crazed look flaring at the corners of the woman’s eyes. “This is my home, dear. No matter what Varina has told you. This is the home where my son was born. Where my husband and I built our lives, and then healed after Varina joined the devil.”
His heart thumped hard, anger permeating his insides. “I always forget how much Southerners enjoy rewriting history.”
Lina’s smile slipped a notch. “Watch yourself, boy. If you’re not careful, Varina will drag you in and get you killed. Nothing but trouble follows that girl. The devil’s servants always find her. Always.”
Campbell flashed her an unpleasant grin. “I’ll take my chances.”
The pretense dropped completely, and Lina’s face twisted into an ugly scowl. “Listen,” she spat. “That girl broke her father’s heart over and over again. After he got sick, he went a little mad trying to find her, pushing me and his real child out of his life. I lost the last few months with my husband because of that little bitch. I will not lose my house.”
“Too bad it’s not your house.”
“She has no right to be in there, looking through his things.”
“Seems the law feels differently.” Campbell pointed to the sleek BMW parked a delicate distance from Varina’s pickup. “I’ll give you one more chance, and then you’re gonna see how not nice a guy I am.”
Deliverance from Sin: A Demonic Paranormal Romance (Sinners & Saints Book 5) Page 16
