by Peter Mayle
It seemed to her a pity to waste a freshly made pot of tea, and so she decided that a visit to Max’s bedroom was called for. But it was the same there. All she saw was another empty room, another bed that hadn’t been slept in. As she returned to the landing, considering her next step-would it be indelicate to try the American girl’s room? No, of course not-she heard the sound of a car pulling up outside the house. She went down the stairs as quickly as the tray would allow, and was barely back in the kitchen when Max came through the door-tousled, unshaven, carrying a baguette and a bag of croissants, his face shining with happiness.
“What a morning!” he said, and, much to Madame Passepartout’s surprise, kissed her soundly on both cheeks. “How are you today, dear madame? I’ve just been down to the village-beautiful, beautiful day. Have you recovered from all your dancing?” He put the bread and croissants on the table, and saw the tray of tea for two. “What’s this? Room service?”
“It was for Monsieur Charles, but he was not in his room.”
“No! Really? Maybe he got lost on the way home.”
“But his car is outside.” Madame Passepartout assumed her most innocent expression. “Where could he be?”
“Your guess is as good as mine, madame.” In fact, he said to himself, your guess is probably exactly the same as mine. “Did you by any chance try the young lady’s room?”
“Of course not. The very idea!” An eloquent sniff at the very idea, and a swift change of subject. “And you, Monsieur Max. How was the evening for you? If I may say so, you show considerable promise at the paso doble.”
“Ah, but I was in the arms of an expert.” And, remembering the other arms he had been in until half an hour ago, he had the grace to blush.
Madame Passepartout was by now more or less satisfied with her investigations; she could report back to her friends not one but two empty bedrooms. She started to prepare coffee, and as the glorious smell of freshly ground beans filled the kitchen, she passed on to Max her personal souvenirs and impressions of the evening. There had been an incident-perhaps Monsieur Max had not noticed-when Gaston the meat supplier, whom everyone agreed was prodigiously drunk, had attempted to fondle Maître Auzet’s derrière, only to have his face slapped with such force that one could see the imprint of her hand on his cheek. The Americans had ended the evening on a wave of wine and popularity, having donated their baseball caps to the members of the accordion band by way of applause. The baker’s daughter-well, the less said about the baker’s daughter and that young Gypsy the better. And the mayor had at last plucked up the courage to dance with the widow Gonnet. Altogether, a most satisfying fête.
Max was only half-listening, his thoughts still with Fanny, when Charlie-also tousled, also beaming-shuffled into the kitchen clad only in a pair of boxer shorts striped in the salmon and cucumber colors of the Garrick Club. “Ah, there you are,” he said to Max. “Looked for you everywhere last night.”
“Unavoidably detained, Charlie. You know how it is. Have a bun.”
The two friends sat at the table with their coffee and croissants, grinning at one another like men who had won the national lottery-but, being English, not about to exchange any intimate details. It wasn’t necessary; their expressions said everything. Eventually Madame Passepartout threatened them with the vacuum cleaner and expelled them from the kitchen.
“God, it’s good to feel the sun on your back,” said Charlie. They were finishing their coffee in the courtyard, the pigeons strutting back and forth with the self-important air of politicians at a party convention, the sound of the fountain cool and refreshing in the warm morning air. Charlie nodded at the bassin. “Got any fish in there?”
Max looked at the dark, impenetrable green surface and shook his head. “For all I know, there could be half a dozen sharks, but the water’s so mucky you’d never see them. I’m going to drain it in the autumn and give it a clean; maybe put some carp in, and a few water lilies.”
There was a thoughtful look in Charlie’s eye. “So you’ve made up your mind. You’re going to stay on.”
“I’m going to give it a try, yes.”
Charlie clapped him on the back. “Good for you. I’d do the same myself. Now, what’s the plan for today? I thought I might take Christie down to the village for a spot of lunch.”
Max looked out across the vines, for once deserted. Roussel must have overdone the paso dobles last night and danced himself into a state of exhaustion. “Do you think you could call your friend Billy?” he said. “See if you can get any joy on that wine?”
Nearly two hours passed before Charlie reappeared, this time with Christie, both of them glowing, fresh from the shower and looking a little sheepish. They found Max finishing a phone call. “I’ve booked a table for you,” he said. “Well, for us, actually. Fanny doesn’t speak any English. I thought you might need a bit of help with the menu.”
“Oh, I’m sure we could”-Charlie was cut short by Christie’s elbow in his ribs, but recovered himself admirably-“that would be great. Do you know, I was down in Cannes once-this was years ago, before my French had improved-and I ordered the only thing I thought I recognized on the menu, something called an omelette norvégienne. And I asked for some French fries to go with it. The buggers gave it to me, too. They never told me it was a pudding.”
Jean-Marie Fitzgerald added up the figures for a second time, taking a moment to enjoy them before closing the small, now rather worn notebook in which he had recorded details of his wine sales over the past several years; details that were best kept well away from official eyes. He swiveled round in his chair and, from the bookshelves behind his desk, selected a cracked, leather-bound volume of Molière’s L’Avare, its pages hollowed out in the middle to provide a convenient but discreet hiding place for the notebook.
It was all most satisfactory. The euros had accumulated in the account in Luxembourg to the point where Fitzgerald was a wealthy man. Another year or two like this one, and he would be sitting on a cushion of money for the rest of his life, with more than enough for a pied-à-terre on Park Avenue and a house and a boat in the sunny, delightfully tax-free Bahamas. The sooner the better, he thought. He was tired of Bordeaux and its incessant preoccupation with wine-although, as he had to admit, wine had served him well. Wine, and the more gullible side of human nature.
He could see only one problem that might interfere with his otherwise well-ordered and prosperous future: the Englishman, who had showed a little too much interest in the vines for Fitzgerald’s liking. This year’s vintage would be safe; tests and investigations would delay an oenologue’s report until well after the vendange. But after that? If only the Englishman could be persuaded to sell.
Fitzgerald made a note to talk to Nathalie. As he well knew, she could be extremely persuasive.
When Christie, Charlie, and Max reached the village, they saw very little trace of the previous evening’s festivities. The strings of colored lights were still there, hanging like tropical fruit among the leaves of the plane trees, but the trestle tables, the benches, and the stage were all gone, dismantled and loaded up overnight on the truck that would take them to the next fête. A sprinkling of tourists lounged on the café terrace, and from inside came the slap of cards that punctuated the never-ending game played by four ancient gentlemen at a table in the back. The square was empty except for one or two hurrying figures, clutching bread and late for lunch. Normality had returned to Saint-Pons.
It would have taken a keen observer to notice any difference in the way Fanny treated Max from any other well-liked client. She might have nuzzled his cheek for a second or two longer than usual when they were exchanging kisses, and her thigh was touching his shoulder while she was standing by the table taking their order. The same keen observer might also have detected an extra twitch to her hips as she walked away. But on the whole she was, as Charlie remarked, a model of discretion, and a girl you could very definitely take home to meet your mother. “Now then,” he said, taking a cr
eased envelope from his pocket and smoothing it on the table, “this mystery wine.” He held his empty glass out to Max to be filled as he looked down at his notes. “Billy had a job getting the details, but he knows his stuff. I’m sure he’s got his facts straight, even if they’re a bit hard to believe.
“First of all, we can’t afford it. It’s not at all widely known, except to hard-core connoisseurs with what Billy calls ample funds. It’s part of a fairly recent phenomenon in the business-garage wines, Max, remember?-tiny vineyards with very limited production. Well, they’ve taken off like mad in the past few years, and they’re fetching prices that would make your eyes water; just the thing for wine snobs with more loot than sense.” He paused to sip his wine and look at Max. “Actually, it’s exactly what I was talking about when we had dinner in London. Pity Uncle Henry didn’t leave you a bit of land in Bordeaux.
“Anyway, the wine from this particular vineyard is selling for serious money: thirty or forty thousand dollars a case-that’s wholesale, if you can get any. And you’d be lucky to get any because the production is never more than a few hundred cases each year. Almost all of it goes to Asia, a dribble to the States, a dribble to Germany, but none to France. Don’t ask me why. And they’re keeping it very close to the chest. Tasting is strictly by invitation only, and you have to deal with the sole representative. Let’s see now”-Charlie turned over the envelope and squinted at the scribbles on the back-“yes, here we are. I suppose it’s a bloke, but you never can tell with French names. Someone called Jean-Marie Fitzgerald.”
Max, in mid-swallow, almost choked. “Who?”
“But we met that guy.” Christie leaned across to check the name on the envelope. “How many Jean-Marie Fitzgeralds can there be in Bordeaux?”
Charlie looked from one puzzled face to the other. Max described Fitzgerald’s visit to the vineyard, and that made three puzzled faces around the table. “If it is the same guy,” said Christie, “what was he doing down here pretending to be…”
“… an oenologue recommended by Nathalie Auzet,” said Max. “Who we know is up to something.”
They had been neglecting their first course, and ate in thoughtful silence until the last scrap of jambon cru and the last sweet scoop of Cavaillon melon was finished. “I’m just thinking out loud,” said Max, “but suppose Roussel’s wine-our wine-that Nathalie Auzet pays for in cash and arranges to have shipped out by truck every year-suppose that’s going to Fitzgerald.” He was distracted by Fanny’s breast brushing his ear as she bent forward to take away his plate. Coming back to earth, he went on: “And suppose he bottles it, sticks on a fancy label, and jacks up the price.”
Charlie consulted his envelope. “I got the right name, didn’t I? Le Coin Perdu-that’s what was on the label you saw.”
Max nodded, leaning back in his chair. “What a scam. But if you could pull it off you’d make a fortune. The best Luberon wines fetch twenty or twenty-five dollars a bottle. Give the same wine a Bordeaux label, keep it exclusive, make up a convincing bit of history, and the sky’s the limit.”
Christie shook her head. “People would know. They can’t be that dumb.”
“Don’t bet on it,” said Charlie. “You’d be amazed. This is the wine business, remember? The emperor’s new clothes in a bottle.” He nodded his thanks as Fanny put a plate of moules farcies, fragrant with butter, parsley, and garlic, in front of him. “Look, say you put the word out very discreetly to one or two of the top buyers and let them in on the secret of this fabulously exclusive wine-well, their clients aren’t likely to argue. The emperor’s new clothes in a bottle,” he said again as he speared a mussel, clearly pleased with the description. “And you’ve got human nature working for you, don’t you see? Pick your man, appeal to his ego, flatter him rigid, tell him how much you admire his taste and his extraordinary palate. Then tell him that this is an unknown treasure-there’s an old chestnut that’s worked a couple of times in the property business, I can tell you-and you’d like him to be one of the lucky few to discover it. These people love to be the first to spot a great wine. And, most important”-Charlie jabbed the air with his fork in emphasis-“you tell them to share the secret only with a few trusted clients. Publicity would spoil everything. Come to think of it, that’s probably why they don’t sell it in France. The frogs would ask awkward questions.” He raised his eyebrows at the other two. “Well? It could work, couldn’t it?”
It seemed wildly improbable. Although, as Christie said, it seemed more than wildly improbable-inconceivable, even-that a man would spend half a million dollars on a single bottle of wine. And yet it had happened. This was news to Charlie, and he jumped on it. “There you are,” he said. “Exactly what I’ve been saying. Common sense goes out of the window all the time in the wine business.”
“Suppose you’re right about this,” Christie said. “How do you prove it?”
Suggestions and countersuggestions went back and forth over the mussels and then the cheese. Max ruled out calling in the police, which would ruin Roussel as well as the others. A confrontation with Nathalie Auzet was raised again, and discarded for the same reason: she would simply deny everything, and for lack of proof she would get away with it. The more they talked, the more it became clear that they should concentrate on Jean-Marie Fitzgerald.
They were sitting with their coffee, watching the village come slowly back to life after lunch, when Max turned to Christie. “Who’s the richest man in the world?”
“I don’t know. Bill Gates?”
“George Soros?” said Charlie. “A Rockefeller, a du Pont, a Rothschild-no, wait a minute, what about the Sultan of Tengah? He’s worth a bob or two.”
All Max knew about the Sultan of Tengah was that he was oil-rich-enormously, outrageously rich. He had vast real estate holdings in cities all around the world, he had forests in Canada, herds of bison in Wyoming, gold fields and diamond mines in Africa, gas holdings in Russia. The palace where he spent most of his time was rumored to have four hundred rooms, each furnished with magnificent antiques. But apart from those few fragments of information, well known though they were, he was a mystery-rarely seen in public, never photographed, a reclusive Croesus.
“Perfect,” said Max. “He’d be perfect. Charlie, you couldn’t have come here at a better time. Here’s what we’ll do.”
Nineteen
“I can’t do it with you two making faces at me,” said Charlie. “I need to be alone. This is going to be an artistic performance. You’re sure he speaks English? I’m not altogether confident in French.”
“Trust me,” said Christie. “He speaks English.” She and Max shut the door behind them, leaving Charlie to himself in the cavernous, shabby sitting room. He arranged his notes and a pencil on the low table in front of his chair, and ran his thumb across the business card that Max had given him: simple and classic, the name of Jean-Marie Fitzgerald engraved in copperplate script. Charlie took a deep breath and picked up his phone.
“Oui?” The girl’s voice-brusque and slightly ill-tempered-prompted Charlie to put on the plummy, upper-class drawl he normally reserved for his plummy, upper-class clients.
“Good afternoon.” Charlie let the words hang in the air for a moment to let the girl adjust to a foreign language. “I’d like a word with your Mr. Fitzgerald, if he’s available.” He spoke with exaggerated slowness and clarity.
But the girl’s English was fluent, with the hint of an American accent. “May I ask who’s calling?”
“Willis. Charles Willis. In fact, I’m calling on behalf of my client.”
“And your client’s name?”
“I’m afraid I’m not at liberty to divulge that-except, of course, to Mr. Fitzgerald.”
Charlie was put on hold, and he was treated to a couple of minutes of recorded chamber music while he reread his notes. Then: “Mr. Willis? Jean-Marie Fitzgerald. What can I do for you?” Christie had been right, Charlie thought. The man spoke English with barely the trace of an accent.
“I hope you’ll forgive me, Mr. Fitzgerald, but before we go any further, I must ask you to keep this conversation and any subsequent dealings strictly to yourself.” Charlie waited for the murmured reassurance, then continued. “I act as the personal wine consultant and buyer for a very eminent client, a great connoisseur, a man for whom wine is one of the major pleasures of life. He is also a man of quite remarkable modesty and discretion, which is why I had to ask for your reassurance. But to get down to business: not long ago, word reached my client of your wine, Le Coin Perdu. He has instructed me to investigate, to taste, perhaps to buy. And so, not entirely by chance, I find myself in France.”
Charlie could almost feel the curiosity coming down the line. “Well, Mr. Willis,” said Fitzgerald, “I should tell you that discretion is as important to me as it is to you. We never speak of our clients; our dealings are completely confidential. You need have no concerns, I assure you. And so I don’t think you would be committing any breach of trust if you were to tell me his name. I must confess I’m intrigued.”
Here we go, thought Charlie. He dropped his voice to a level just above a whisper. “My client is the Sultan of Tengah.”
There was a moment of silence while Fitzgerald tried to remember the estimate he had read somewhere of the Sultan of Tengah’s wealth: a hundred billion? Two hundred? More than enough, anyway. “Ah yes,” he said. “Of course. Like the rest of the world, I have heard of him.” Fitzgerald had been doodling on a notepad, and jotted down the figure of $75,000 per case. “May I ask where he lives?”
“He spends most of his time in Tengah. He owns the country, as you probably know, and finds it more agreeable to stay at home. Travel bores him.”
