“Get out! Just get out and don’t ever come back!” I scream through the pain. My heart hurts too much that I’m surprised I’m still able to speak.
Hearing a door opening up, Ryan appears from his room and as soon as he sees me and Brandon, he hurries straight over, with Alyssa following right behind him.
“What the hell is this?” Alyssa asks, her eyes widening when she sees the state I’m in. Wrapping her arm around me, I watch as Ryan goes to stand beside Brandon, with a look of confusion spreading into his eyes and over his face.
“Dude, you’re back?” Ryan asks, his eyes still glancing between the two of us. “The cops won’t stay away bro. What the fuck did you do?”
Opening the door wide, I step towards him and grab his arm, pulling him towards it so he’ll just leave, “I said get out!”
“I left for us, I left because they threatened me, Alexis. I had no fucking choice!” Brandon’s voice has raised as he pleads with me, clutching my face in his hands as he tries to keep me from looking away from him.
I close my eyes and will for the pain to stop. For everything to stop. I just want the life I had before back, where nothing was complicated.
“Brandon?” Neil questions, still wearing the same clothes as he was last night, so it’s evident he’s only just arriving home. “What’s going on?” keeping his eyes held on Brandon, he doesn’t look my way, not even once.
“I need Alexis to understand why I left, why I came back and—“
“Whoa, wait a second,” his eyes dart over to me for a moment, before he averts his attention strictly back to Brandon. “By the looks of things, you both need to calm the fuck down.” Neil says, placing his arm around Brandon’s shoulders as he leads him over to his room. “Come and explain what the hell has been going on, bro.”
Brandon glances over his shoulder, his gaze fixed firmly on me as Neil leads him over to his room. He looks so frustrated, so upset. He looks so hurt.
“If you don’t believe me, Alexis, I may as well give up the fight and let them throw away the key. You’re the only person I need, the only person I want. If I lose you, I lose everything that has been keeping me going each and every day through all of this,” Brandon’s voice is laced with sadness as he says the words, and I can see the pain in his eyes, the desperation.
Before I have a chance to think of anything to say back to him, he turns away and disappears through into Neil’s room.
Maybe Neil’s right. We need to rationalize things. If things weren’t adding up before, they most certainly aren’t making any sense now.
10.
Explanation
“Here,” Alyssa says, handing me a cup of coffee as she comes to sit beside me on my bed. Nodding and accepting the drink from her, I sit up, feeling more tired than I ever have before.
“Alex? Can I come in?” It’s Ryan. “Alex, Brandon just left.”
Letting out a deep breath, I stand and walk over to open the door, my eyes feeling sore and my head pounding from everything that has been happening, “He’s gone?”
Shrugging his shoulders, he throws me a sympathetic smile as he steps through to join me and Alyssa, “I know it’s a lot to take in Alex, but well, I believe him. I believe every goddamn word he just told both me and Neil.”
In a way, I want to be able to believe him too, but that would mean having to admit that my mom’s life was taken in pretty much the same way as Holly’s. The fact that her death was caused intentionally, rather than caused by a tragic accident.
If it’s true then I want to find out who did this to her. Who did this to my father. Who did this to me.
“He asked me to give you this,” Ryan tells me, holding up a piece of paper. Taking it from him, I see it’s a cell phone number, and not the same one as he had before.
“Do you really think that he’s being set up again, Rye?” I ask, my voice shaky as I wonder why anyone would be so callous as to destroy someone’s life like this.
“Without a shadow of a doubt, Alex,” he answers me, holding his hand out for Alyssa to come over and join him. “You really need to hear him out.”
Smiling sadly over at the both of them as they make their way over to the door, hand in hand, I glance back down to the piece of paper that I’m holding in my shaking hands.
Grabbing my cell phone, I dial his number, not entirely sure what I will even say to him.
“Alexis,” his voice is a hoarse whisper as he answer, “I’m so—“
“Where can I meet you?” I ask, my voice flat as I cut him off from speaking. “I want, I need for you to tell me everything, no holding anything back, not if you want me to be able to trust you.”
***
He never gave me a place on the phone, he just told me to be ready and waiting outside the campus grounds, and to be sure that there were no cops in sight.
Well, I’m here and waiting, but I’m not so sure if I’m ready for this.
After standing on the sidewalk for around ten minutes, a black SUV, the black SUV, pulls up at the side of the road, stopping right in front of me.
Glancing around the area one final time, I walk over to the passenger side and open the door, seeing a pair of dark brown eyes looking right at me as I climb inside.
“Seatbelt,” he demands, before pulling away and heading towards the I-5. “Maybe I should formally introduce myself. I’m Zach, Brandon’s cousin.”
“Cousin?” I ask, feeling confused, but then I guess it makes more sense. It seems as though he has been working with Brandon, rather than against him, and they do look similar. Very similar.
Hitting the pedal as we make it onto the main highway and head out of the city, he smiles, but keeps his eyes firmly glued on the road ahead. I notice him glancing through all of the mirrors every couple of minutes, but I don’t think it’s just for the simple reason that he needs them to be able to be a good driver. He’s making sure that we’re not being followed.
“Cousin,” he repeats, not saying another word as the music cuts out and his cell phone begins to ring. Taking the call, I hear his words, but not the person on the other end of the line. Earpiece. He’s wearing an earpiece, of course he is.
“Around ten minutes or so … Sure… Yes, she’s wearing her belt,” he snickers, throwing me a smile and rolling his eyes over in my direction. It’s obviously Brandon who he’s speaking with. The way he just reacted makes it a little more comfortable to be in his company. He seems less intense than when I’ve seen him on all the other occasions.
Once he ends the call, I notice his smile as he turns towards a narrow trail to our right, “Where exactly are we going?” I ask, looking out of the window and only being able to see that we’re heading towards water.
“Some place you and Brandon can be alone together, with no worries of cops showing up or people bothering you,” he answers, his voice softer than when he was speaking on the phone. “He’s been one hell of a fucked up mess ever since you followed me the other night, actually, he’s been messed up ever since he called me the day he left you.”
My eyes land over on him because of the words he’s just spoken, making my stomach twist and a feeling of nausea begin to sweep through me. He’s been a mess? Well, that makes the both of us.
“Was it you who slipped that note into my pocket last night?” I turn to ask, knowing that it’s most probably a stupid question to be asking him. Of course he did, who else could it have possibly been?
He begins to tap his fingers on the steering wheel, his jaw clenched, and I notice his breathing becoming increasingly heavy, “Yes, although I thought it may have been a little more difficult to do so,” he answers, his voice curt. “Maybe I should thank your friend for his distraction method, you didn’t appear to notice, after all.”
Shit … Neil. Zach was there when Neil kissed me.
“Have you told Brandon? About what happened I mean?” I feel sick just wondering how he’d react, knowing that his best friend and his girlfriend, if I am still his girlf
riend that is, did something together that was more important to him than sex. “Neil kissed me, not the other way around, I tried to fight him off of me.”
“Oh, I know,” he nods, his voice relaxing some as the car begins to slow down. “That’s why I haven’t mentioned any of it to Brandon. I’d say he’s been hurt far too many times in his life to have to go through it even once more, wouldn’t you agree?”
“Neil’s going through a few things, he was drunk … It was a complete misunderstanding,” I tell him, because that’s all that it was. A misunderstanding, and although I would never think about acting the way he did, people handle their hurt in different ways.
Zach doesn’t answer me, he just keeps his eyes focused ahead of him as he continues to drive me to my unknown destination.
Gazing back out of the window, the car begins to slow down again, until finally stopping in front of a small wooden cabin. I’m meeting with him here?
Zach climbs out and I watch as he walks around to open my door, but I don’t climb out right away. Standing at the top of the steps on the porch, I see Brandon. His head is hanging low, with his shoulders slumped even lower.
My heart feels as though it’s stopped beating when I see him bring his gaze slowly over on the car. I notice his chest expanding a couple of times, through taking deep breaths, before slowly making his way over to us.
“Thanks, man,” his voice is low. He knocks knuckles with Zach, before Zach helps me out and onto the stony pathway. “I’ll call you.”
“Nice to officially meet you, Alex,” Zach tells me, and throws a wink in my direction, before climbing back into the SUV and starting the engine.
“You came,” Brandon says, with uncertainty within his voice, “I was really scared you wouldn’t.” he lifts his head up, and that’s when I see the redness around his eyes. He’s been crying. Seeing him like this makes me hurt more. I hate seeing him like this. I hate it.
Without saying another word, he takes my hand in his and leads me towards the cabin steps, turning around once and giving me a small, sad smile before we walk inside.
“I almost didn’t, but I need to know the truth … I need to know the truth about you, about me … about my mom,” I begin to say, watching as he turns to face me, with a look of understanding spreading over his features. “Brandon, I need to know—”
“Anything, I’ll tell you anything you want and need,” he answers, nodding and stepping closer, so we’re only a foot away from each other.
“Was any of it real?” I watch as his face drops at my question. “You and me. Did you feel anything for me at all, or did you only need me to help you out with clearing your name?”
The grave look crossing into his eyes, and the way his lips are beginning to quiver, isn’t making me hopeful that I’ll get the answer I so desperately want and need to hear.
“You’re doubting my feelings for you?” he asks, looking mystified. “Alexis, how could you ever think anything else? I’m in love with you. I’m so fucking in love with you that when I left that day, I felt like I’d died inside, worse, worse than that—“
“I don’t know, maybe because you tore away my necklace, the same way you ripped out my heart?” I snipe, instantly regretting what I just said when I see his eyes appearing glazed again. “If you love me as much as you say you do, then why did you leave me?”
He closes his eyes and does that same thing I was so used to seeing him do before. He runs a hand through his hair, shakes his head and drops his gaze, “It wasn’t by choice, beautiful.”
Turning away from me, he heads towards what I assume to be the kitchen and so I follow him, determined to get the answers I’ve been craving for, for so long, “Then why?”
“Wine?”
“Yes, wine … Brandon, stop avoiding this!” The frustration is evident in both my voice and tone as I step in front of him, taking the bottle from his hands and placing it down on the countertop behind him. “Please?”
“I didn’t, I mean, I couldn’t be the one responsible for your life too, Alexis, I couldn’t,” he says, sounding completely defeated, clenching his eyes shut and lowering his head once again. “That day, do you remember when I left your place to go and grab my things? Well, when I got back to my dorm, there was a note on my bed … It said … It said that I needed to leave if I didn’t want you taken away from me. Taken away from me in the exact same way that Holly was.”
I feel like I’ve been sucker-punched really hard in the chest at hearing his words, “What?” I blurt out uncontrollably, with my mouth beginning to dry up.
“I guess I got too close to finding out who did it, who took Holly and … and then I got a text message, Alexis. It was of a photograph, a photograph of you. They knew who you were and they said if I didn’t leave my cell, the file I had on the case, my keys, my ID, if I didn’t leave everything behind and go within the hour, they would take you away from me,” his hands are shaking and I can see the tears forming in his eyes.
“So that’s why you left,” I mumble, lifting my hand and using my thumb to wipe the tear that just landed on his right cheek away. “Zach, Harry, shit I’m so confused …”
Inhaling a deep breath, Brandon nods and places his hands on my waist. Looking up and gazing into his eyes, I can tell that he’s being truthful with me, “Let me get you that wine,” he insists, before turning around and grabbing the bottle from the side and then reaching into one of the cabinets on the other side of the kitchen, taking two glasses out from the top shelf.
Tilting his head over to the side, summoning me join him, I make my way over and walk through a double doorway into the large living space, “This place is nice,” I say, turning back to see that he’s watching me. “Whose place is this?”
“Holly’s mom and dad own it and said I could use it for as long as I needed,” his voice is quiet as he takes a seat on one of the dining chairs. “They’ve always known the truth. They have never once questioned me about any of this.”
“I … I saw the flowers you left on her stone the other day, they were beautiful,” I say, taking a seat opposite to him and watch as he pours us both a glass of red wine.
“Flowers? I haven’t been to Holly’s stone since before I left … the first time I left, I mean,” he says, a look of confusion spreading over his features at what I said. “It was probably her mom, dad, or sister who put them there.”
Smiling as I take the wine from him, I think back to the note that was placed on her headstone with them. It didn’t seem to be something one of her relatives would write, more her lover, that’s why I had assumed they were from him.
“What’s wrong?” he asks, his brow creasing when he must have seen my look of surprise and face fall. “What did I say?”
“No … no, nothing,” I assure him, taking another sip of wine, a much larger one this time. “So, Zach?”
Leaning his elbows on the table, he keeps his gaze on me as he goes to answer another one of my questions, “Zach is my cousin. He lives out of state but after all this happened, I asked him to come and stay here for a while, so he could keep a watch over you. Make sure that you were safe,” he begins, “when he saw you were going out of town, I panicked. We didn’t know how long you were going for, or why, or anything, so I asked him to follow you there.”
“Right, so if it wasn’t you, and it wasn’t Zach, then who the hell broke into my father’s home?”
His complexion turns pale, and his eyes dart around the room, breaking the contact we had, “This … this is what we’re still trying to figure out.”
I notice he’s still not willing to look at me, and so I assume this is where my mother fits into all of this. “You think it was the one who was threatening you, with me, don’t you? What? They were after something? Evidence that could have framed them if anyone had have gotten a hold of it?”
Only nodding his answer, without so much as another word, he picks up his wine and practically throws it down his neck. Reaching for the bottle, he offers m
e a refill, before filling his glass right back up to the brim.
“They must have figured there was something there that they needed, I don’t know, I really have no idea,” he eventually answers, “I did as they asked and I left, I was willing to accept I would never clear my name of everything, so I have no fucking idea why this is happening. All I wanted was to stop all of this, so I could come back … so I could come back to you.”
“They planted your ID in the house so the cops would come after you. They want to see you go back inside.” It’s finally beginning to make sense, well, most of it is. “But why?”
Sighing, he slumps himself against the back of his chair, looking completely drained, “I really have no fucking idea, beautiful.”
Brandon’s cell phone sounds, and I watch him as he stands and walks slowly through to the kitchen to grab it.
He didn’t leave because he wanted to, he left because he had to, in order to protect me.
The guy that I thought was guilty of everything that’s been happening lately, is in fact Brandon’s cousin, and is completely on his side. He’s not against him at all.
The cops found Brandon’s ID card at my father’s home, but it wasn’t him who broke in there, because he was told to leave everything behind before he left.
“Zach,” he says while entering the room and holding his cell up to me. “He’s on his way over here now to collect you and take you home.”
Walking passed me, and through the sliding doors which lead onto the terrace, he looks miserable. I stand, follow him out there, and see him gazing out over the lake, which looks to be about a mile or so away. “We’re not going to have our forever just yet, are we?” I ask, my voice laced with sadness as tears begin filling my eyes.
“You still want a forever with me?” he asks, his voice tight as he turns to face me. He puts his arm out for me to go and join him by the small fencing.
Stepping forward and into his reach, he places his arm around me and pulls me into him. Resting my head against his chest, I can hear his heartbeat thundering and his hands softly stroking up and down my back, “Yes, I want our forever,” I tell him, making the most of the time I have left with him, until I have to go back to the campus, alone.
Misplaced Trust (Misjudged) Page 9
