by Roger Bray
Within an hour they were eating the quickly made burgers and some pita chips and dip washed down with a few more beers. They spent the first evening of Alex’s freedom standing around the kitchen talking about everything, except Hazel.
Two days passed before Ron Balfour finally rang and told Alice that the last of the reporters had left and Alex could finally go to his own house without running the cordon of reporters. Ron’s call came just at the right moment. After two days, feeling as though he was hiding, Alex was ready to go home and was planning for Alice or Steve to drop him down the road where he could sneak back into his house without the reporters sitting on the road seeing him. Even if they did see him, he thought, he was an innocent man. The courts had released him, and he had nothing to hide, anyway. If he gave them the five minutes sound bite they wanted, they would go away, wouldn’t they?
Alice wasn’t so sure and tried to talk him out of it. Steve had an opinion, but kept it to himself rather than get in between a brother and sister argument. Alex seemed to be winning and was pretty determined to go home, where he belonged, he said.
The argument had reached the point where neither of them was listening to the other when Alice’s cell phone rang, and she answered it a little angrily but thinking that the interruption couldn’t have come at a better moment. She looked relieved when she hung up and passed on Ron’s news that the cruisers and reporters had finally given up and left.
“Great,” Alex said and went into the bedroom to get his few belongings together while Steve reached out and brushed his fingers on Alice’s arm. He gave her a little smile and winked his eye, silently happy that the decision had been reached without the need for any further argument.
It was late afternoon when they reached Alex’s house and he quickly let them in through the front door using the key that Alice had given him.
The house was silent and as he expected it to be. Somehow though it felt empty, emptier than he had expected. Like a display home, it gave all the feeling of a house but not a home. At least a display home gave off a feeling of potential. His house felt like a soulless shell. A façade of a home that felt like you could push over a wall to reveal a movie set and the scene that had been set up to fool you. There was none of the sense of being lived in and Alex placed his bag deliberately in the center of the kitchen worktop, as if he didn’t want to disturb the feeling of emptiness.
Alice had kept the utilities connected, and he turned on the light and walked to the sink where he flicked the facet, watching while the water ran. He flicked his fingers through the stream until the instant water heater kicked and it turned from cold to regulated hot. Going to the adjoining garage door he opened it and turned the light on revealing the big cluttered garage as he had left it. Except that it wasn’t, the investigators and the forensic teams had gone through it piece by piece to ensure that Hazels body hadn’t been hidden away somewhere among the clutter of boxes and old furniture. Checking every item for evidence and finding none.
Looking around, he decided that this would be his first job, to keep himself busy if nothing else. Clear out the garage so at last he and Hazel could park their cars inside. The thought pulled him up short and with a last look, he switched off the light and closed the door.
Turning, he gave Alice a small, sad smile before slowly walking to her and putting his arms around her and hugging her. Alice knew what he was thinking. Soulless though the house might be, every part of it was a reminder of Hazel and Alex would never be able to get away from that until he sold up and left but she knew he wouldn’t do that either. This was his and Hazel’s house, to move would be to betray that and what they had before. Alex felt he had done that enough. He would stay and keep her memory alive even if it ripped his heart apart to do it.
He broke away from Alice and nodded his thanks to Steve who had come back into the house after getting the bags of groceries he had bought earlier. Not much, but enough that he wouldn’t have to go out for a couple of days unless he wanted to.
“Do you need a hand packing away?” Alice asked.
Alex shook his head.
“No, that’s fine. I’ll be fine.”
“I think I should stay overnight, in case.”
“In case what? That I do something stupid. If I was going to do anything I would have done it a couple of years ago in OSP. Thanks, but I need some time. I’ll be fine. I need to …” he struggled for a word. “Readjust.”
“OK, all right,” Alice said, unconvinced that she should leave but Alex gave her a little smile and Steve took her hand and gently led her to the front door.
“Anything at all, ring me. We can be here in a few minutes.”
He nodded, “Sure.”
“Promise?”
He laughed, “I promise, sure! Cross my heart and hope to …” he mocked, “get the hell out, sister. I’ll be fine. Thanks.”
Steve managed to get Alice out of the door and with a final smile and a nod, Alex closed it behind them.
The bravado left him as he stood staring at the back of the door. The memory of the last time he stood like this came back to him; the night Hazel left for the last time. Sighing at the sudden memory rush he turned purposefully and went into the kitchen. Unpacking the groceries only took a few minutes and when he was finished, he reached into one of the drawers and found the bottle opener.
“Thanks, Steve,” he thought, as he screwed the bottle opener into the cork on one of the bottles of Cabernet that Steve had thought to provide with the groceries. The cork resisted but came out with a satisfying pop as he gave the handle of the opener a little twist.
He left the bottle standing on the bench top as he picked up his small bag of possessions and walked through the house to the master bedroom with two walk-in wardrobes, one for each of them and its own bathroom with double sinks and a big shower.
Throwing his bag into his wardrobe, he stepped into Hazel’s. He had promised himself that he wasn’t going to do it, but like a cliché, he reached out and took hold of one of her dresses. He pulled the material to him and breathed deeply. It was all Hazel for that moment. He hadn’t done this when she had left him, maybe because he trusted that she would be back. Now though he had nothing to hang on to except a collection of her clothes, her scent, and big gaping hole where she should be.
He let the sleeve drop and took a deep breath while he looked around. Turning his back on the wardrobe he turned off the light and closed the door behind him. The last thing he did before he left the bedroom was to turn down the bed then he headed back toward the kitchen and the Cabernet, which probably hadn’t stood long enough but he couldn’t be bothered waiting any more.
It was getting dark, and the house was too light. Alice had turned on most of the lights when they had walked in and Alex turned them all off except for one in the hall and the drop lights over the worktop in the kitchen.
Sitting on one of the stools against the breakfast bar he was drinking the wine from one of large glasses Hazel had liked. She had bought the set from a little shop in Eureka when they were down there on holiday and they had spent a happy week sitting on the veranda of their beach front cabin trying the local wine in the big glasses.
Declaring them one of her best buys ever, she had been so upset when she had broken one. The set, now only five, were sitting in the cupboard over the stove top and although he usually preferred a smaller version, he was using these in silent memory of Hazel. He had drained the glass and thinking of filling it when he heard an insistent scratching noise. Walking into the dining room, he pulled the drapes open and was startled for a minute at the sight of the big Maine Coon, Moth, at full stretch pawing the window glass.
He couldn’t help but smile as he opened the door and the big cat gave him a look as it entered the room. He closed the door and closed the drapes and followed the cat back into the kitchen.
Moth looked at him accusingly that he was the only one here. He had loved sitting next to Hazel while she worked on her laptop, one paw re
sting on her arm or stretched out with his big head pressed against her outer thigh.
“Hey, big fella. How have you been?” Alex asked.
Disappointment over, he came back to Alex. He head-butted Alex’s legs while purring loudly before looking up at him with his big, yellowy-green eyes.
Alex was close to the wall, and he leaned against it and allowed his back to slide down the wall and his feet to slide out in front of him until he was sitting on the floor with his legs together in front of him.
Moth stepped onto his legs and then laid full stretch almost along the whole length of Alex’s legs. He stretched out his big polydactyl front paws until both were resting on Alex’s stomach. His purring increased as he looked straight at Alex, almost as if he was saying, “Dude where have you been, I have missed you.”
Alex leaned forward and buried his face in the thick silver and black fur of the cat. Moth didn’t mind, and the purring continued as Alex started to cry for the first time since that cold night three and a half years earlier.
*****
It was a little after nine o’clock when Alex woke. He had always been an early riser and if he slept past seven, felt that half the day was wasted. The prison routine hadn’t been that hard for him in the predawn because of that but this morning, he was late. But he didn’t feel the sense of wasted time, a pounding head and for a moment he wished that he hadn’t drunk the full bottle of Cabernet. He had finally got off the floor and refilled his glass and had taken it and the bottle into the lounge room with Moth following on behind. When he sat in the lounge, the cat jumped up with him and curled up at his side while he slowly sipped on the wine and stared across the room.
He thought that maybe he should turn the television on, watch a movie. Anything to create noise and give him a sense of normalcy. In the end, he was happy to sit and stare into the dark. Not thinking of anything, he resisted dwelling on any subject and if the thought of Hazel came to him, he dismissed it. Not to be callous but for self-preservation. Alex knew that he would always think of Hazel, but doing it when drinking was probably not a great idea.
It didn’t work. Everything he thought about would quickly lead him back to her. He tried to think of him and Alice working on a new app, but it always came back to Hazel standing in their work room while they explained what they were trying to get it to do and her input into the process. Even idly scratching Moth behind the ears, something the cat loved, made him remember Hazel clasping the big fella to her chest while she waltzed around the kitchen to his laughter and the cat’s bemused and slightly worried look.
Hazel was in everything he thought of. Thinking of her had kept him going through prison, even when the thoughts turned to not knowing what had happened to her. He knew that this was inevitable. There would be many nights to come when he would sit here like this, with or without Moth but the Cabernet or a bourbon would likely become a fixture for a while.
He finished the bottle without guilt and then realized that he had been sitting there for the better part of two hours. It had been getting late, and he had wandered into the bedroom, quickly stripped off and got in to bed. The wine did what he hoped, and he was asleep in a few minutes. No thoughts to stop him sleeping and no dreams to jerk him awake. He didn’t even notice when Moth, affronted at having been left behind, jumped onto the bed and curled up next to him.
The big cat was still there, sitting upright next to him with a questioning and slightly pained look on his face.
Alex sat on the edge on the bed and let the dull headache settle a little before he pulled on the clothes he had let drop to the floor.
Moth jumped off the bed and walked to the open door. He had a quick yawn on the way and stretched out his long front legs and dug his claws into the carpet. Alex started to breathe deeply to keep the acidic residue of the wine down before he could follow.
Alex followed the cat to the dining room door and opened it to let him out. The Maine Coon mewed his thanks and scampered across the patio and into the garden while Alex closed the door behind him. He went into the kitchen and turned on the coffee machine, checking the level of water and filling up the bean hopper from a bag of whole beans that Steve had included in the groceries.
As the machine warmed up, Alex checked the fridge and decided that bacon and eggs were exactly what he needed and a few minutes later he was glad that he had as he dipped a piece of bread in the fried egg yolk and bit into it.
He was finishing as there was a knock on the door. At first, he thought it would be Alice, but she had a key and was always welcome to come in anytime. Maybe she was feeling that he needed space and was giving him the option of ignoring her. Opening the door he was still expecting Alice and Steve instead; it was Ron Balfour standing on the porch with a big smile.
“Hey, man. Good to see you.”
“Ron. Hi, how are you?”
“Good, man, good. Look Audrey sent me over. We saw lights on here last night, she was going to come over then, invite you to dinner and such. I told her to leave it alone; that you probably needed some time. That was fine she excepted that but she wouldn’t shut up this morning. She doesn’t like to think of you mopping around when you have friends to help if you need it.”
“I appreciate it, Ron. Tell Audrey I’m fine. It’s a bit weird, being back with everything that’s happened. I needed a moment.”
“Sure, I know, but if you need anything. Do you have groceries in, did you eat last night?”
Alex smiled and thought of the wine. “I’m fine, Alice and Steve got me some stuff in, enough for a few days. Did you want to come in, coffee?”
Ron looked as though he would accept but Alex was happy when he declined.
“Love to but I’d better not, Aud will be wondering what’s going on and I’d better get back and tell her that you’re OK. Let’s get together, maybe on the weekend if you’re up for it? Barbecue or something. Our place or here if you prefer? Let me know.”
“Sure, Ron, thanks, and thank Audrey for me as well. It’s nice to know there are people that care.
“We do, man, we do.”
He turned and walked down the path toward the road leaving Alex standing on the step.
Chapter Four
Steve and Alice stood in her dining room looking at piles of paperwork on the table. All the leftovers from the trials and appeals and in the center, the much smaller pile of statements and reports that had finally got Alex released.
“I guess we can junk all of this now.”
“Let’s keep one copy of everything and all the notes but, yeah let’s get rid of the rest. At least you get your dining table back.”
They spent the next hour sorting through the paperwork. Shredding what they didn’t need. The small pile they were keeping they put into a box that had previously held reams of paper.
The results from their own investigation, Steve put to one side and Alice stacked the three boxes they were keeping on the floor.
“What are we doing with this?” she nodded toward the small pile.
Steve scratched the stubble on his chin. “I want to keep working on it.”
“But Alex is out,” she started before she realized what he meant. “Find out what happened to Hazel you mean?”
“Don’t you want to know. Wouldn’t Alex like to know where she went that night? And I’m sure her mom needs closure.”
“The cops looked and couldn’t find her. What makes you think that we can?”
“The cops also decided that Alex was guilty and look how well that worked out.”
“Yeah, but there’s nothing left of that night. There was no evidence then and I guess that there’s none now either.”
“Hard evidence from the scene probably not. But look how much Phil was able to get from her car and that was after the government’s forensic team had been over it. We know a hell of a lot more now than we did before we started this.”
“True,” she wasn’t convinced. “But haven’t we exhausted that. I mean what else is
there?”
“Someone took Hazel, and that someone knows what happened to her. I think that it may be someone local and maybe Alex being released will shake things up a bit.”
“How?”
“Whoever did this thought they were in the clear. Alex was found guilty and locked up for Hazel’s murder, so the real murderer felt safe. When he heard that Alex was to be released with the charges vacated, he may have started to worry a bit. He isn’t to know that the DA will probably not reopen the case. That in fact the DA probably wants the whole thing to go away and stop messing up his impressive reputation for guilty verdicts.”
“So, he might panic.”
“He might make a mistake. Any evidence might already be gone, or it might not be. In which case, he might decide to get rid of it before it becomes a problem.”
“Even if he did, we don’t know who he is, so we don’t know where to start looking, anyway.”
“No, we don’t. You’re quite right. Worse case would be that Hazel was taken on that night. There are enough big properties, camp sites, or hiking trails only a short drive from Eugene. She could have been taken anywhere in any direction. Why would she be taken to start with? Rape and murder maybe as simple as that. Let’s say that’s what happened, and our mystery man took her somewhere. He raped and murdered her and got rid of the body and the bags that she had with her.”
“Nicholas said two. A suitcase and a vanity case.”
“And that doesn’t make sense either.”
“What doesn’t?”
“The bags. I’m kidnapping a woman off the street with the intention of, let’s stick with raping her. I might know her, so there’s no way I can let her go after it happens, so I would probably know that it will end in murder. I’m not going to buy her flowers and drop her home, am I?”
