The Baby Bargain

by Jennifer Apodaca

  She put her hand on his arm. “Why don’t you sleep, Adam?”

  He had a big mouth. What was it about Megan that reached through his defenses? “All the travel in the military has messed up my sleep patterns.”

  She was silent, rubbing her thumb back and forth on his wrist. “You wanted to travel, wanted to be a hero. Did it turn out the way you thought?”

  Caught by surprise, he leaned his head back and thought about it. “I wanted to make more of a difference, but no matter what my team achieved, it was never enough. If we eliminated one threat, six more took its place.” And good men died horrible deaths.

  He stared up at the ceiling, feeling the desolation and loneliness wash over him. No, it hadn’t turned out the way he wanted. Brady was still dead, and his parents had died without forgiving him.

  “What do you want now?”

  He looked down at her. “In my life? To build the most successful security agency possible. My men will never lack tools or resources to get the job done.” He had money and talent; he just needed the right connections.

  “But right now?” He put his hand beneath her chin and told her the truth. “I want to see if you taste as good as I remember.”

  He leaned in to kiss her.

  Chapter Four

  As Adam lowered his head toward her, Megan felt her stomach tighten and her body heat. His hand caressed her jaw and shivers danced over her skin. She inhaled his rich musk and clean soap scent just as he brushed his lips over hers. He trailed his hand up her throat and cupped her cheek, his thumb stroking her skin as his lips brushed her mouth.

  Adam. The ashes of her love for him stirred deep in her chest, making her gasp.

  He groaned and took his hand from her face to scoop her legs off the floor and lay her across his lap.

  He lifted his head, his golden eyes burning with fever. “More, Meg. Let me taste you.”

  His thighs were hard beneath her bottom, his strong arms supporting her, but what touched her was the sheer need in his eyes. She knew it was lust, but she still found herself reaching up to take his face in her hands and pulling his mouth to hers. This time the kiss exploded. Adam caught her hair, tilted her head, and explored her mouth. He tasted of coffee and pure male heat. Her nipples peaked and her body grew hot, needy.

  Sliding her tongue along his, she wanted more. It had been too long and her body cried out for his touch.

  He gave her no respite, pushing her, consuming her. He drew his hand over her face, down her throat. The pleasure burned a path of hot desire, making her arch as a low moan slid from her.

  Adam broke the kiss, his gaze locked onto hers. “Do that again. Make that sound for me.” He slid his hand down to cup her breast, using his thumb to tease her nipple through her tank.

  Fire shot straight to her core. This was how it had always been with him, and the memories of their shared pleasure heated her imagination as his touch blazed across her skin. She wanted to feel him pressed against her. She wanted to experience again the incredible sensations only he could make her feel. She wanted to lose control with him. Just the two of them…

  The two of them.

  Cold reality seeped in. What was she doing? It wasn’t just the two of them—she had a son to think about. A son she loved more than her own life. Cole was everything to her. She could no longer afford to be reckless or wild. She was a mother. To Adam’s child, the son he didn’t even know about.

  Grabbing Adam’s wrist, she pushed his hand from her, scrambled off his lap, and stood.

  “Meg, what’s wrong?” He let her go, but his voice betrayed his confusion as he rose to his feet.

  Without looking at him, she donned her sweatshirt and zipped it up. She needed all the armor she could get. She turned and nearly yelped to find him standing only six inches from her. Dang, he moved like a ghost. He towered over her five foot seven by more than half a foot and weighed at least fifty pounds more. He made her feel small, and when she was in his arms, protected. Seeing Adam this way—it cut her with guilt. Cole was his son. Had she been wrong to keep their child a secret?

  But even as she wondered if she’d been fair to Adam, she had to remind herself that Cole was her main concern. She couldn’t risk her son’s tender heart with a man who might not treasure it. Besides, Adam had already proven that he was a man who had a habit of walking away.

  “I’m too old and have too many responsibilities to be your sex buddy, Adam.”

  His face went dark. “I never called you that.”

  She couldn’t do this again. Both times he’d left her, it had hurt right to her soul. But she no longer harbored schoolgirl fantasies of romance. She was a realist, and maybe it was better to get it all out on the table. “What is it you want from me?”

  He rubbed his hand over the shadow of his beard. “I’ve never forgotten. No matter where I went, what I was doing, you were there in my mind.” Dropping his hand, he looked her in the eye. “I want us to be friends.”

  Megan heard her heartbeat in her ears. “With benefits?”

  “I’d be lying if I said I didn’t want that.” Intensity burned in his eyes. “You felt it tonight—we’re still attracted to each other. But I want to be friends, with or without sex.”

  In other words, he was confident he could seduce her. And why wouldn’t he think that? She’d fallen into bed with him easily enough after his parents’ funeral. But she was different now. She had to be, for Cole’s sake.

  Ellie stirred on the bed. Eager for the distraction, Megan crouched and began examining her. The wound was already looking a little better. This was what she was good at—taking care of animals. She felt grounded and whole as a veterinarian, and as Cole’s mother.

  Adam’s shadow fell over her, but he stayed silent while she carefully checked Ellie’s vitals. Pleased with the dog’s progress, she said, “The worst has passed. I’m going to keep her with me for a day, administer the antibiotics, and a little sedation to keep her quiet if she needs it.” She stroked the Lab’s head and Ellie opened her eyes. The dog licked her hand, then closed her eyes and went back to sleep.

  Megan let herself feel relief and happiness at having helped the stray. Growing up feeling alone and unloved by her father, she had always gotten unconditional love from her pets. Their selfless devotion had helped patch the hole in her heart. Now her passion was giving back to the animals that needed her.

  Finally, she rose and faced Adam. “I’ll call you when you can pick her up.”

  He jerked his gaze from the dog to her. “I cared about you in college. Too damned much. My feelings for you threatened my goals. You wanted a home and family, and I wanted a career in the military. I had to break up with you.”

  She worked to keep her emotions under control. “And three years ago?”

  “I was committed to the Marines. I couldn’t stay. It just seemed better to keep it simple.”

  Simple?

  He must have seen the incredulous look on her face. “Doing what I did, serving where I served, I didn’t want any strings that would complicate things. Simple.”

  Megan wasn’t sure if she wanted to laugh or cry. Simple? It might have been for him. But three years ago, her life had been anything but simple. The panic of realizing she was pregnant. The decisions. Not knowing how to find Adam—he hadn’t left her any way of contacting him…

  Simple.

  It wasn’t that simple for her. “And now, Adam?”

  “I’m being honest with you,” he said softly, reaching out to touch her arm. “I’m only here a few weeks, and after that, I’ll be back in L.A. Spend time with me, Meg.”

  Tingles ran through her body as she realized she was actually considering his offer.

  Spend time together, and they would end up in bed. A brief affair with no attachments. She rarely dated, and when she did, no one made her feel the way Adam had. Megan was ravaged by desire and a longing so deep it felt like her heart was bleeding. She’d thought she had healed. Gotten over him. She wanted t
o say no just to protect herself from more pain.

  But she needed to do this, needed to see him, talk to him, find out if he had any room in his heart for a son. And she had to do it fast, before he heard about Cole in town.

  This was the best way. At least this time, she would know it was temporary. But she had conditions. She wasn’t going to go on real dates and run into people who would tell him she had a child.

  She forced her gaze to his face. “Okay. Let’s spend some time together while we can.”

  …

  Adam had been so desperate for her to agree that he’d been holding his breath. It was a relief to know she was nervous too. He could feel the tension in her arm where he held it above her elbow. “Excellent. Dinner tonight?”

  She shook her head. “We’re not doing that. No dates, no going out.”

  He narrowed his eyes. “Why not? Is it that guy Cole? Trying to keep this secret to prevent him from finding out?”

  “No.”

  Relief eased through his tight muscles. Megan wasn’t a liar. That was one of the things he’d always liked about her. If she said it wasn’t another guy, then the field was clear for them to see each other for a few weeks.

  She took a breath. “But this isn’t a relationship. I’m not going down that road again. We’ll keep it private.”

  He didn’t like the way that sounded, almost as if she were ashamed. “We’re old friends catching up. What’s wrong with that? I’d like to take you to dinner.” He wanted this time to be different from the last time he was here.

  She stepped back, putting distance between them. “No dinners out. I can’t tonight, anyway.”

  He opened his mouth, but she cut him off.

  “I’ll pick up dinner and bring it to your parents’ house tomorrow night around eight or eight-thirty.”

  He’d had enough. Adam hadn’t stayed alive, kept most of his team alive, by being dense. Megan was hiding something. If not a man, then what? He closed the distance between them. “What’s really going on, Meg?”

  She backed up until she bumped the exam table. “I told you, I’m not doing the dating thing. You’re leaving in a few weeks. I don’t want to make this public.”

  Adam placed both his hands on the cold metal table, caging her in. “And I’ve been honest about that. So what are you hiding?”

  She dropped her gaze to his chest. “Nothing.”

  Definitely lying, and in his experience that was unusual for Meg. It made his guts churn to realize that she didn’t think she could tell him…whatever it was. Why didn’t she want to be seen with him? She’d looked him in the eyes when she’d denied being involved with another man, so he believed her about that.

  Then what?

  She stiffened her spine. “Stop analyzing me. You said you wanted to see me, then you’ll see me on my terms.”

  She was right. It was time to retreat. He’d find out tomorrow night what the problem was. Taking his hands from the table, he skimmed his palms up her arms. “You win, except I’ll get dinner for us. We’ll eat, have some wine, and talk.”

  “Fine,” she said softly.

  “And if you are willing, touch,” he added, skating his fingers over her shoulders to the bare skin of her throat. He wanted her, ached for her. Something was wrong, and he was going to get it out of her. Hell, she’d been there for him three years ago. If something was wrong in her life now, he could help her. But first he needed to win back her trust. A strategy was forming in his mind. Running his thumbs along her jaw, he said, “No sex.”

  “What?” She frowned at him. “I mean I never said… I thought you wanted….”

  “I know, I’m just getting it off the table. I want you, believe me. I’m hard for you right now.” He pressed his hips against her, letting her feel his arousal. “But all these years I stayed away so I wouldn’t hurt you again. I’m determined to prove to you, and maybe to myself, that although I can’t give you the life you always wanted, I can give you real friendship that doesn’t have to only be about sex.”

  But it would include finding out what was troubling her. He couldn’t recall Megan ever keeping a secret from him. He didn’t like it one bit.

  Chapter Five

  Megan pried the plastic dinosaur from her sleeping son’s hand. She tucked the beloved stuffed Newfie pup under his arm and pulled up the covers. Every day she saw more boy and less baby in his face.

  More of Adam.

  Her heart twisted and she sighed. Leaning down, she kissed him one last time, then she snapped off his light. Light from the hallway spilled in, outlining Max stretched out on the floor, his head resting on his paws, his big brown eyes watching her. Crouching down, she petted the dog, taking the time to scratch his favorite spot by his right ear. “You’re going to get on the bed the second I walk out, aren’t you?”

  He yawned.

  Megan laughed softly. Max was well trained, a great guard dog, and a beloved playmate to Cole. In the last month, since Cole had moved from his crib to his big boy bed, Max had taken to sleeping on the bed at Cole’s feet.

  When she left the room, she kept the door ajar so Max could come and go as he pleased. Sometimes he hung out with her while she transcribed notes, worked on cases, wrote up reports, and studied lab results. Then he would return to Cole’s room when she went to bed.

  But tonight she was going out.

  In the family room, she dropped onto the couch and slipped on her shoes. Her mom looked up from her laptop. “Been a long time since you’ve been on a date.”

  “Not a date, Mom. Just seeing an old friend.”

  “In skinny jeans and high heels?”

  Should she change? She’d already changed three times. Besides, this wasn’t a date. It was more like…an interview. She was interviewing Adam to be the father of their son. She repressed a sigh, focused her attention on her mom. “How’s the speech coming?”

  Her mom had her shoulder-length strawberry blond hair loose, and she wore yoga pants and a T-shirt. She looked about forty, not the middle ground of fifty.

  “The speech is fine. It’s what I want to say. But you know, I’m a retired nurse, not a politician.”

  Megan leaned forward, her own worries dimming beneath the glow of her pride. “You’ll be a great mayor, Mom.” She meant every word. Catherine had gotten her degree and her nursing job after Megan’s father walked out on them. She’d also made him pay child support. Her mom had worked hard, and in every spare moment, she’d been there for her daughter. When Megan had found herself pregnant, heartbroken, and terrified, Catherine had been her rock. Now, her mom was remarried to a nice man, Hayden. She had retired early to go after her own dream—serving as mayor of Raven’s Cove.

  “I think I’ll be a good mayor,” Catherine said. “But I’m plain spoken. Not everyone responds to that.” She tapped her fingers on the side of her laptop.

  “Your patients did. They appreciated your honesty.”

  “That was different. They were sick and scared in the hospital. People in that situation usually do better with a little gentle honesty and a lot of listening and support. But these people are country club folk.”

  “So is Hayden,” Megan pointed out. “And he loves you.”

  “Yeah, he does. Okay, this is silly. I’ll do my best, but if I don’t get elected, then I’ll just focus on other things. My life is pretty full.”

  There was her practical mother. “For the record, I think you’ll win.” Megan stood, scooped up her purse, and kissed her mom. “Thanks for watching Cole.”

  Catherine smiled. “Happy to watch him, and it’s easy when you put him to bed.”

  Megan always put him to bed when she wasn’t working late. As she headed for the door, she said, “I won’t be later than eleven.”

  “Megan.”

  Pausing, she looked back.

  “Do you know what you’re doing? It’s not like you to keep secrets, like who you’re seeing tonight.”

  She didn’t want to have this conversat
ion. The only thing she and her mom had ever really fought about had been her decision not to find Adam somehow to tell him about Cole. But she wasn’t going to lie, either. “As soon as I figure it out, I’ll tell you.”

  “Respecting your privacy here. Remember that come Mother’s Day.”

  Megan laughed. “Or at least until I get home tonight, right?”

  “That’s why you’re a doctor, sweetheart. You’re so smart.”

  As she walked to the car, she wasn’t at all sure it was smart to get involved with Adam Waters. But at least this time she didn’t have any false expectations, so her heart was safe. He wouldn’t catch her by surprise.

  Megan looked around the backyard in surprise. Lanterns hung from the patio cover, and mouthwatering scents filled the air from the covered warming trays. The table in the center of the patio had a white tablecloth, flowers, and two place settings. She took it all in.

  Then she turned to Adam and…he looked better than the food smelled. His brown hair was brushed back with just enough wave to soften the hard lines of his face. He had on a black pullover opened at the throat with sleeves pushed up. Molded jeans. Even in her heels, Megan had to look up to meet his eyes.

  “Wine?” He picked up a bottle and poured some red into two long-stemmed glasses. “Come, sit down.”

  She walked to the table and took the glass he held out. “Adam, what is all this? I mean…those are catering trays.” This close, she caught the scent of him, rich with an edge of spice, and all male.

  “You wouldn’t let me take you to dinner, so I had dinner brought to us.” He pulled out her chair. Once she was settled, he said, “I’ll be right back.”

  Less than a minute later, he returned with two chilled baby spinach salads. “We also have tri tip, rosemary-flavored baby carrots and potatoes, and for dessert, chocolate-dipped strawberries.”

  The salad was crisp with a light dressing. Delicious. “I didn’t think I was very hungry, but this is wonderful.”