Raising the scalpel again, now glistening with her brother’s blood, she lifted her other hand in supplication to the Goddess she would now never serve and never see. She’d never find out if being a Nexus could be a good thing. Never find her true family. Never love Iain again.
With a cry torn from the deepest part of her soul, a cry filled with a grief she could not hide from, Eloise swiped the blade across her wrist.
The metal bit deep, the pain as bright and crimson as the blood that pumped from the severed artery. Swapping the scalpel to her other hand, she repeated the action across the other wrist. The knife slipped in her blood-coated fingers before it did much more than make a scratch. Swearing, she wrapped the knife in the sheet and tried again. It bit deep, slicing through tendon. Her hand flopped, as the burning flare of white-hot pain trembled up her arm. Horror rose at what she’d done, but she bit it back, clamping her mouth against the bile that rose to choke her. Blood ran in a stream from her wrists across her hands, pumping out of her in a warm gush. The room swayed and she grabbed onto the edge of the bed. Slippery with blood, her one useful hand slid from the rails. She clutched at the sheets, desperate not to fall. She couldn’t fall. If she did, she was afraid she’d never get back up.
Desperate, she locked her shaking knees, forced herself upright, to stand steady against the roar of encroaching blackness rushing at her from all sides.
She let go of the linen and held her hands, palm down, hovering a few inches above Cain’s chest where she’d carved the rune.
Blood spurted from her wrists onto Cain’s chest, running across his skin and down his sides in macabre rivulets. Nausea rose with the black, but she pushed both aside. She had to finish it. She couldn’t stop now.
Closing her eyes, she called on her power. It came flooding into her at her call, wrapping around her, weaving into her nerves, tingling across her skin. Light flared behind her eyes and she sucked in a breath at the wonder of it. She’d never seen it like this; never felt it like this. Never imagined it could be this great, even after what the Goddess had told her. She’d doubted, even when Cain told her his plan to use her power, to add it to his for Morrigan’s use. Now she didn’t doubt. She knew what she planned was right.
They couldn’t be allowed to have her power.
She opened her eyes and focused on the rune beneath her hands, calling its shape and meaning into her mind, filling it with the light. Beneath her hands, the rune began to glow and hum. Despite the thickness of her blood coursing across her palms, she could feel the buzz of power, the rise of heat from the rune as the power within it was activated by her blood sacrifice. A blood sacrifice that would lead to her death. She had made sure of it. Nobody would come. Nobody would save her. She would die and her power would die with her.
Filled with her own power, she then called on the power of the moon, the power of Oestra. Magic shimmered around her, through her, filling her with an energy she’d never felt before. The ley lines in the earth sang to her and she pulled on those too. She buzzed with the power of the moon and the earth and the Goddess and the tides. It rushed through her, so great, it was almost a burn. It was more power than she’d ever held before—more power than she knew could exist in one person. But it was hers and it felt right.
Trembling, she murmured the words she wished she’d never learned and sealed her fate.
‘Return to flesh, use my blood
Separation ends with the red flood
Take my body, steal my breath
I offer myself in trade, to eternal death
Three by three by three by three
My blood is now yours, so mote it be.’
Heat flared from her hands, diving into the rune. A whoosh of blood-orange light encompassed her, expanding out. Her vision wavered and swirled, liquid and viscous, full of all the colours of the spectrum, before settling into a violet blue where shadows whispered and the air vibrated with the deafening melody of life all around. She looked up, her mouth falling open and the blood-orange light shot up from her and through the ceiling. Somehow she could see it travel through the rock and soil above her head, up through the roots and greenery of the forest and into the open sky. It shot up to the moon, colouring it in blood.
A beacon.
Aimed at Cain. Drawing him back from the ether where her blood, twin blood, would allow him to re-establish the severed connection with his body. It was why she was the only one who could heal him. Her blood could bring him home.
***
‘Why won’t this damn thing go faster,’ Shelley said, smashing her hand against the elevator button.
Adam took her hand, held it in both of his. ‘Stop it, Kitten.’
She shot him a look, but didn’t pull away. ‘We have to hurry.’
‘I know, but smashing the button won’t make the elevator go any faster.’
She glared at the door. The spirits were swirling around her, their silently screaming faces misting out of the darkness one after the other in a never-ending kaleidoscope. Thank God she couldn’t hear the noise they were making. Somehow the banshee scream had silenced them. But the silent screams were creepy, and she wished the banshee scream had banished sight of them as well as sound.
She craved to be alone.
After this was done, she would make sure of it. Except…
She glanced sideways at the powerful Were standing so staunchly by her side. His kiss was still hot on her lips. Her skin still tingled from his touch. She’d thought her heart was practically a dried husk of nothingness after having been torn apart too many times. Her ex-fiancé cheating on her had been the last straw. Since then, her heart functioned on the bare minimum she needed to stay alive and maintain her friendships with Skye and Bron, and nothing more. She didn’t even have anything left to give her family or old coven—had long ago separated herself from everything they were, everything they’d wanted her to be.
But this annoying Were at her side had brought a spark to life in that nearly dead heart, and his kiss had made that spark flare into a small flame that exhilarated and frightened all in one go. She wanted to smother it, to never allow it to grow.
His thumb swept over the back of her hand, and she whimpered as the flame flared. She had to do something about it before things got out of hand, but she didn’t have time. Not now. Not with all this going on.
Fuck! Death was around the corner. She could practically taste it. So how could she even be thinking about what she wanted to do with Adam? It was insane. And yet her mind pressed her for an answer, almost as if she needed to make a choice. But what choice? What was the answer? And why was it so important she make that choice now?
‘You all right, Kitten?’
Adam’s hand swept down her arm, leaving goose bumps in its wake. ‘I just need this goddamned elevator to go faster.’ The elevator jarred to a halt and the doors slid open. ‘Finally!’
Before them, a long corridor stretched out, lit at intervals by lights that gave off a blue glow. Down the end of the corridor was a large steel door with a glass window in it. Two Were stood at the door, banging on it, yelling.
Shelley took off down the hall before the others could say a word, Adam hot on her heels. The two Were turned to face them, looking past Shelley to Marcus.
‘Alistair. Jane. What’s going on?’
‘We came down here as soon as you contacted us, but we can’t get in,’ Alistair said.
‘And Iain is lying on the floor, not responding.’
Shelley pushed past them and peered through the door. She could see Iain lying on the floor, not moving. The curtain around the bed was billowing so she got glimpses of Eloise standing next to the bed, head tipped back, pale face lit by a horrible orange light that seemed to radiate from her to shoot up through the ceiling.
‘Cain’s killed him,’ Jane said.
‘Or Eloise did,’ Alistair added.
‘No. She wouldn’t do that,’ Shelley said, gaze pinned on the two figures in the room. ‘She loves
him.’
‘How do you know that?’ Marcus asked.
‘She’s his mate,’ Adam answered.
‘Fucking hell.’ Marcus nudged her aside to have a look through the window. ‘How the hell did that happen? He’s a Lone Wolf.’
‘We don’t know, but it has. The need began to pull on the pack bond in earnest a few days ago, but it strengthened tonight. There’s no ignoring it or thinking it’s anything else.’
Shelley turned and glared at them. ‘Why does that even matter right now? We have to get in there.’ Desperation clawed at her. ‘We have to stop her. She can’t die. We need her. We all need her.’
‘What do you mean?’
‘Shelley saw it,’ Adam answered when she didn’t. ‘If she dies, there will be war. Not just between us and Morrigan’s coven, but the humans will get involved. It will destroy us all.’
‘She truly is the Nexus,’ Cordy whispered.
Shelley wish they’d all shut up and concentrate on a way in. ‘Yes! And she’s sacrificing herself so Cain and Morrigan can’t use her power. She has to use blood magic, but then she’s going to let the blood continue to flow until she’s dead.’ She rubbed her head. ‘The spirits have been trying to tell me all afternoon, but I couldn’t hear them. I didn’t want to hear them. She’s not doing this just to save her coven friends. Or her brother. She’s doing it to save us.’
‘But Cain’s still a danger to us even if he doesn’t get her power.’
‘Only if he gets back to Morrigan. She knew, by doing this, she was taking their big advantage away. We have to get in there, now, because she’s wrong. If she dies, things will be so much worse.’ She kneaded her knuckles against her chest, trying to massage out the pain that was pulsing there. ‘We have to stop her. We have to get in there, now!’
Marcus reached for the keypad, but Alistair said, ‘I’ve already tried that. She’s fried the circuits or something.’
Jane said. ‘Smoke came out of it when I opened the panel.’
‘Fuck.’ He rubbed his hand over his face. ‘Right. Then let’s find a way in.’ He bent down in front of the fried panel and began to pull off the faceplate to expose the wires below.
Cordy turned to the others and gave them instructions to go back up to the surface and get the acetylene torches. ‘We might have to cut through the door.’
‘Right,’ they said and were gone.
Shelley turned back to the door and banged on the glass. ‘Iain!’ she called out. ‘Iain, wake up.’
The curtains around the bed billowed again, showing Eloise, her bloody hands on Cain’s bare chest, her head thrown back, white eyes staring up at the ceiling as words whispered from her lips. Shelley didn’t need to hear those words to know they were full of power. Even out here in the hall, she could feel the force of that power skitter up her arms, raising her hairs and electrifying her nerves.
‘Eloise! Stop. Pull back. We’ll find another way. You don’t have to do this. Eloise!’
‘It’s not working,’ Adam said, his head next to hers as he peered through the glass. Maybe if we try a different tack.’ His gaze fell to Iain. Shelley grasped his meaning and tried again. ‘Eloise. You have to let us in. Iain’s hurt. You need to let us get to him. He may die if you don’t let us in.’
The power skittering along her nerves jerked. Eloise’s head flopped forward, then she turned to stare at the door with eyes that were no longer pure white. ‘Iain,’ she mouthed. She moved, as if to lift her hand from her brother’s chest.
‘No! I forbid you to stop now.’ A voice screamed through the tunnels, making Cordy and Shelley flinch and the Were swear and cover their ears. Eloise jerked, her hand slapping back into place on Cain’s chest. Her head tilted back to stare at the ceiling, so far it seemed improbable that anything human could bend like that without snapping their neck. She began to shake. Something dark swirled at her feet, crawling up her leg. She screamed. The agony in the sound made those in the hall flinch again.
Shelley felt wetness on her cheeks—tears. Adam tried to pull her away from the door, but she turned on him, shoving at his chest. ‘No! We have to get in there. We have to get in there now.’
He didn’t argue, just turned to Marcus and said, ‘Let’s smash this door.’
Marcus nodded and stood, giving up on the electrics. ‘Cordy. Join me.’
‘Are you sure?’
He nodded. ‘Shelley said we have to get in now. I need your strength to do this.’
‘What are you doing?’ Shelley asked.
‘Something rarely tried,’ Marcus said, expression grimmer than usual. Catching Cordy in a rough clasp, he kissed his mate passionately and swiftly, then stood back. ‘Now.’ Cordy put her hands on either side of his head, closed her eyes and whispered some words Shelley didn’t catch. There was a rush, as if the air had been sucked out of the hall and then power thumped into her, making her stumble back into Adam.
Marcus twitched and seemed to grow larger. His muscles rippled in his arms, his T-shirt stretched to bursting, his eyes snapping with blue lightning in their depths as he growled.
‘Can you do that to me?’ Adam asked.
‘I’ve just brought the strength of his wolf fully to the fore. It’s dangerous, and will only last for a little while and will make you incredibly weak and vulnerable after.’
‘I don’t care. Shelley said we have to get in there.’
Cordy nodded, her face pale. ‘Okay.’
Shelley stopped her from raising her hands. ‘Have you got energy for this?’
‘Just enough.’
‘Are you sure?’
‘It’s the only way. The others are going to take too long to get back with the torch and you don’t know the spell.’
‘What can I do?’
‘Try to get through to Iain. We need him to wake up. I’m afraid he’s the only one who’ll be able to stop this.’
‘I’ve never tried to contact other members of the pack before through the bond.’
‘But you know how?’
Shelley nodded, lips pressed together. She’d never wanted this, never wanted to create more ties—had been happy to pretend connection by burying herself in studying the diaries and learning more so she could simply find a way to stop the hell. But there was no choice. She had to do this. Right now.
Turning back to the door, she stared through the window at Iain, aware of the moment Cordy touched Adam with her power. She felt the kick of it through him, the pained groan as his body was forced to do something that wasn’t in its nature to do. Without thinking, she sent power through the bond that linked her to Skye and Jason and from them into Adam. He settled a little. A soothing stroke on her senses through the bond. Then she turned her attention to Iain. Closing her eyes, she pictured him where he lay on the floor.
‘Iain.’ She reached down the bond to the spark that was him. ‘Iain, wake up. We need you now. Wake up.’ Nothing. She didn’t give up. Couldn’t. ‘Iain, Eloise is killing herself. You have to wake up. She’s your mate. You have to do this. For her.’
She was aware of being gently moved aside, but didn’t pull her attention from the spark that was Iain. She was certain it had grown brighter. Certain he was listening. She kept trying as Marcus began to kick the door with all his Alpha force, Adam adding his strength to the Alpha’s.
The screech of metal filled the air.
‘Think of what’s important to you, Iain. Think of Eloise. Think of how all this began.’
Chapter 25
A buzzing filled Iain’s head, joining the hammering ache in his skull. The pain was bad enough, but the buzzing—what the fuck was that? He tried swatting at whatever it was but couldn’t lift his arm. Then the buzzing coalesced into words. Words that didn’t make sense.
‘Think of Eloise. Think of how it all began.’
Eloise? How it all began? For him, it had begun when he’d opened bloodshot eyes and seen the brave slip of a woman, beaten and bloody, stand up to her brother and Morri
gan and fight for River. For Gareth. For him. For a people she’d been taught to hate. In his pain-glazed eyes, she hadn’t seemed insignificant or useless. He couldn’t understand why they were talking to her like she was nothing, treating her like garbage. Fury had risen inside him and he’d wanted to lash out at them for daring to touch the angel in their midst.
He should have known then. Should have seen what was so clear to him now.
She was his mate. And there was no stepping back from that. There never had been. He’d been a fool to think his pack status meant anything in the face of that. His dreams had been trying to tell him that for months now. Because she wasn’t just his mate. No. It wasn’t as simple as that. She was his throughout time. His soulmate. They were meant to be together. Had always been together. He remembered now. This had happened before. He had been a Lone Wolf then too—it seemed that was an indelible part of his essence. But if he was meant to be alone, then why give him someone to be with?
‘To challenge us. To make us more.’ The voice of his past came to him. Malcolm’s voice. It was a part of him, but not him. He’d struggled against the reality of that presence for so long, determined not to be swayed by it, not to be taken over. But he hadn’t understood. Malcolm was only an echo of the past. He had no form or substance on his present. Neither did Bridgette Colliere have anything to do with who Eloise was in the present. They were both luminous and brilliant, passionate and unswerving in their beliefs, but Eloise was also humble, yet fierce in her determination to protect others. She’d been brought up to see herself as plain and unforgettable and unimportant, and had only just realised that wasn’t true. She was coming to see in herself what he saw—a beautiful, strong woman who had written herself indelibly on his memory and in his heart. His soul. She was just coming to realise how important she was—everything hinged on the decisions she’d make because she was the Nexus. That’s what the Goddess had called her. You couldn’t be more essential than that. She was one of the most powerful people he’d ever met and yet she was so humble with it. Such a pure heart. She would always set him straight.
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