by C. J. Miller
Sarah inclined her head. “Soon?”
“My advisors are arranging my marriage.” The words were accompanied by heavy disappointment. As much as he had accepted his fate and the fact that this was the life he had been given, a soul-deep part of him struggled against it.
Sarah stiffened and swung her feet to the floor, away from him. “You’re engaged?”
He rushed to explain and to clear up any misunderstanding. Americans had different notions of what was appropriate for engaged and married couples. “I have not met the woman who’s been chosen for me.” As such, it was difficult for him to muster any warmth for her.
Sarah blinked at him. “You slept with me and we were just kissing.” The words tumbled from her mouth and he heard the shock and confusion in them.
He could see this diving to a bad place quickly. “What you and I have together has nothing to do with my engagement.”
Sarah stood. “I don’t understand. You slept with me.”
Repeating herself was a sure sign she was upset. Saafir would have told her he was planning to marry another woman, but it hadn’t seemed relevant when they’d met. During the night they had spent together, Sarah was the only woman in his life, the only woman who mattered. His engagement, while a topic of discussion and political folly in Qamsar, felt distant and removed from his life. It was a duty and one he would honor, but not something he embraced. “I should have mentioned it, though I didn’t think it was important.”
Sarah glared at him. A full-on, pissed-off glare. “You didn’t think it was important. Will you tell her about me?”
He wouldn’t give his future wife a list of the women from his past. “Why would I? My history has nothing to do with her. Just like she has nothing to do with you.”
* * *
It was as if someone had taken a baseball bat to her chest. Sarah let out the air and for a moment her chest hurt worse than her arm did.
Of course Saafir would have a country of single women interested in him. Probably several thousand if she included other countries. She hadn’t thought about it until now, but it was shocking to think he’d be single. The decision to sleep with him had been based on emotion and lust without regard for the future. Now that impulsive decision was coming back to bite her.
For so long, Sarah had been thinking and overthinking, and she had embraced doing something she’d wanted to do solely for that reason. She should leave now and cut personal ties with Saafir before anyone else got hurt. Putting herself in the shoes of his fiancée, Sarah felt terrible.
A sharp rap on the door and then it opened. Frederick hurried in. “Excuse me, your excellency.”
Saafir appeared mildly annoyed by the interruption, but gestured for Frederick to speak.
“I received a call from the capital. Rabah Wasam’s organized a march of fifty thousand people on the capital and is demanding that you be deposed. There’s a petition and social media is buzzing about it.”
Frederick was already reaching for the remote control. “It’s not on the major news networks since it’s, as yet, a bloodless protest, but we’ll need a response.”
“A response to the same baseless demand we’ve listened to for months?” Saafir jammed a hand through his hair.
“This is the first time the Conservatives have organized a protest this large. They are putting themselves front and center,” Frederick said. “We need a response.”
What did that mean for Saafir and the trade agreement? Would he abandon negotiations to go home and handle the protest?
Saafir turned to Sarah. “I’m sorry, Sarah. We’ll have to reschedule dinner and finish this conversation later. I will ask Adham to escort you to your room.”
He pulled her against him in a quick hug and Sarah could feel the muscles bunched and tensed in his back. Though it wasn’t the end to the evening she’d hoped for, it was an excuse to leave. On the heels of his emotional bomb about his fiancée, Sarah was glad for the space, though frustrated to leave the conversation unfinished.
She had told Saafir she wasn’t interested in problems. As the leader of a nation, his life was filled with them. She should feel happy to leave, but her heart was too heavy to let her believe she could walk away carefree. “Goodbye, Saafir.”
She turned to leave and Saafir grabbed her hand, pulling her to him. “Don’t say it with so much finality. This is not over.”
Wasn’t it? What were they doing if Saafir had a fiancée waiting for him at home? Sarah didn’t have the words to convey the mix of emotions she was feeling. She pulled away without another word. What more could she say on the matter?
Adham met her at the door and walked her down the hall, toward the elevators.
“Does the emir know about your father?” Adham asked.
Sarah stopped and glared at Adham, not liking that he’d dug around about her. Few people knew about her father. He’d wanted to keep it that way. “I don’t discuss my father. As far as I’m concerned, I don’t have one and that is none of your business.”
“It’s my job to protect the emir. That means protecting him physically from harm, but also from complications.”
“Are you saying I’m a complication?” Sarah asked, not masking the anger in her voice. She took Adham’s questions to be openly hostile and she responded as such.
“I’m saying you come with complications and if you stick around, yes, you will be. The emir has money and connections. He doesn’t need someone dragging him down because they’re needy. What will keep your father from coming around if he thinks he can get something from the emir?”
Sarah pressed her lips together over the rant that sprung to mind. When she spoke, she kept the frost in her voice. “Like I said, Saafir and I are friends. I guess you think digging around my past for dirt gives you leverage, or maybe you’re trying to scare me away. I’m not interested in hurting Saafir or using him or taking his money. That’s never been my intention. I don’t have an angle. And if my father decided for the first time to acknowledge that I am his daughter, I hardly think that gives him any influence over Saafir. I don’t even have any influence over Saafir.” Adham must know about the emir’s fiancée. He must know that Sarah played a temporary role in his life.
Adham’s eyes were black with emotion and she wasn’t sure how to read him. She didn’t sense a physical threat from him, but she sensed he would go to great lengths to protect Saafir from danger, and Adham considered her a danger.
Finally he spoke. “I don’t want the captain hurt. He is a good man and he’s coping with a lot. He has women throw themselves at him everywhere we go. Women who think it would be fun to be a princess. I was surprised the emir took you to his hotel room. It was a one-off for him. That tells me I can’t dismiss you and if you’re sticking around, I need to know who I’m dealing with.”
Sarah heard something in Adham’s words. A warmth for the man he called captain. Only that kept her from saying something unladylike and storming away. “Don’t worry about me sticking around. I know he’s planning to marry someone else. When he leaves America, I’ll say goodbye and it will be the last you’ll hear from me.”
Chapter 5
“Please convey to Alaina and her family my most sincere apologies and host their visit,” Saafir said to his brother Mikhail over the phone. He felt like he’d been apologizing to most of the women in his life tonight.
Saafir had planned to fly home at the end of the week, but with the delays in the trade agreement committee meetings, his plans had changed and he had to postpone his return. He wouldn’t arrive in time for the dinner to meet Alaina and her family.
“What do you want me to tell her?” Mikhail asked, sounding unsure.
Mikhail had been unusually reserved since abdicating his position as emir. It was as if the incident had smoothed the hard edges of Mikhail’s personality. Saa
fir wasn’t sure he liked the change in his older brother. He wanted the fire in his brother again. Ideally, that fire would burn in support of Qamsar and for progress and positive change, but anything except the quiet, subservient brother was an improvement.
“Tell her the truth. I am sure she has seen the news reports about why I’m in America. I will meet her and her family as soon as possible,” Saafir said. He wasn’t being entirely forthcoming about his reasons for staying in America. Part of his reason was the trade summit. The other part was Sarah. If he returned to Qamsar and met Alaina, his life would change. He would be engaged and need to close the door on his relationship with Sarah. He wasn’t ready to do that.
He could have delegated responsibilities to Frederick for the trade agreement meetings and stayed in touch over email and by phone, but in person was better. In person made it easier to read body language and tone and watch the reactions of the people around him. They had enough language problems and cultural differences without adding the physical distance of thousands of miles.
“Would you like me to cancel the evening?” Mikhail asked.
It wasn’t like his brother to ask questions. Mikhail liked giving directions and was politically savvy enough to maneuver without needing step-by-step instructions. Hosting Alaina’s family at the royal family’s country home, even if Saafir couldn’t be in attendance, was more polite than canceling. Given the purpose of his engagement to Alaina, he didn’t want to offend her father.
“What do you think is better?” Saafir asked. He wanted Mikhail to make a decision and to take control of something—anything. Maybe it would boot him out of the misery he’d been wallowing in.
Mikhail let out his breath. “I will invite Mother to dinner, as well. Alaina’s family will see we are serious about the match and that we are not insulting Alaina or her family.”
Saafir agreed with his brother’s plan. “Great idea.” Also, it would give Alaina a taste of what life might be like as the emir’s wife: interruptions, rescheduling and priority changes. If she chose not to travel with him, they might not have the opportunity to see each other often.
“We’ve been worried about you,” Mikhail said.
An uncharacteristic display of concern from his brother. “I’ve got things under control.” His PR team was doing damage control on Wasam’s protest and keeping the media abreast of the trade agreement’s progress.
“You can see how easy it is to lose track of problems and how rapidly complications arise,” Mikhail said.
Saafir heard something in his voice, as if he were seeking empathy. He and his brother had never directly addressed what had happened to Mikhail. “I never thought it was an easy job. Now, I know it’s very difficult.”
“I’ll handle Alaina and her family,” Mikhail said, sounding more confident.
“Let me know how it goes,” Saafir said. “I need to go. I have a meeting.” His call waiting was beeping, his phone was vibrating with new texts and his email account was filling with incoming messages. Everyone wanted to speak with him about the government’s reaction to Rabah Wasam’s protest and his campaign to smear Saafir and his family. Though Saafir’s staff was fielding most of the requests, he was facing a late night.
The position of emir wasn’t glamorous. He hadn’t been blessed with the wisdom to solve the country’s problems with ease as his father had seemed to. He needed someone to act as a sounding board, someone without an agenda and without biases.
Sarah. The person he needed now was Sarah. She was easy to talk to and speaking to her had a calming and clarifying effect on his thoughts.
But Sarah was out of reach. Her expression when he’d told her about his engagement had been a hundred knives to his chest. She didn’t understand the culture and she didn’t want to get involved. What could he say to change her mind? They had no future together and he couldn’t offer her anything except in the present.
Saafir cursed his luck. He had to keep his distance from the woman he wanted to speak with the most.
* * *
Sarah wrestled with her feelings for Saafir. Not seeing him for the last two days hadn’t made her forget and had put into focus an emotion she’d hoped would never rear its head: longing. Sarah missed him. Saafir was out of her league and unreachable in many ways. A king of his nation, an international leader and a critical figure in the trade agreement... His time was at a premium, his resources extensive and his life was mapped out for him. People were counting on him to make good decisions and lead his country into a better future.
Why was she even considering seeing him again? The only place where they stood on common ground was in the bedroom. The chemistry between them was so right. Those gloriously hot kisses, those fiery touches and the tender way he whispered to her in the dark created a combination she found irresistible. Saafir made her feel like a desirable woman, a description she hadn’t used for herself in a long time.
Why had she found those qualities in a man she couldn’t have a future with? Saafir was the first man she had dated post-divorce and that had disaster stamped all over it. She wouldn’t label their relationship as a rebound, but she was certainly dragging around enough baggage to weigh them both down.
Was she destined to be irrevocably attracted to men who were wrong for her? She needed to find a put-together, uncomplicated, boring man and fall in love with him. Except somehow those safe guys didn’t light her fire. Those guys didn’t make her feel the heat and burn of desire.
Saafir was engaged to another woman and knowing it hurt more than it should. Getting closer to Saafir would end badly. If she found out anything about the trade agreement, she’d told Owen she would report it, and she didn’t want to be in that position. When Saafir left the United States, Sarah would again be alone, and unlike before she’d met him, this time, what she was missing would be plainly in focus: companionship, passion and excitement.
But her reason for staying away was simpler than Saafir’s engagement or her promise to Owen. She was staying away from Saafir because she was afraid. Not everything was meant to last forever, but she couldn’t be in another relationship that ended in a burning wreck.
Mentally replaying the time she’d spent with Saafir ignited a spark of longing in her body. Lust muddled her thinking and suddenly, she had to see him. She wasn’t a slave to her emotions, but pretending she could stay away from him when she knew he was in the same city was futile and would end with her in his arms. She couldn’t help herself.
Saafir was in the middle of a national crisis, but even emirs needed a break. Perhaps she could convince Saafir to step away for a few minutes.
Sarah hadn’t spoken to him since she’d rushed out of his hotel room. Making up her mind, Sarah freshened up in the hotel bathroom and decided she would drop in on the emir and see if he missed her as much as she was missing him.
* * *
Saafir took another sip of tea and stared out the window of his hotel room. It had been close to forty-eight hours since Rabah Wasam had led a protest at the Capitol building, demanding that Saafir step down.
For the first time since becoming emir, Saafir questioned if it was wise to proceed with the trade agreement with America. He wanted progress for Qamsar. He wanted the people of his nation to sell their goods on the international marketplace and have opportunities to grow their businesses. He wanted the money from oil sales to improve the country’s schools, roads, prisons and libraries. He wanted public services available to those who needed them. Those things required money and resources Qamsar didn’t have at present.
While he and his siblings had not faced a single day of poverty in their lives, he knew what life in Qamsar was like for the lowest economic groups. As a youngster, he had once lied to his parents about his plans and ventured alone into the nearest city. What he’d found there had shocked and angered him.
He had seen childr
en in dirty clothing playing unsupervised on the streets instead of attending school, mothers begging for coins and food, and older people moving slowly in the heat of the day, trying to find shade as they panhandled. The houses in that part of the city were run-down and small and crushed together, windows and doors closed and shades drawn to hinder the heat. Depression and desperation hung over everything and everyone.
Saafir had wanted to observe for as long as he could, but two policemen on patrol had spotted and recognized him. He had been returned to the compound and his father had pressed upon him how dangerous it was for him to leave the safety of their home without the proper security escort.
Progress and changes had been made in Qamsar since then. Those tiny villages had been torn down and more modern apartment buildings constructed in their place. Jobs in factories, fisheries and textiles were more common than herding goats or working the near-barren fields for food. His father had made plans to exploit the oil fields to advance the country’s wealth, but he had died before he had seen them to completion.
The task of driving the country forward had fallen to Mikhail and now to Saafir.
Renewed by the memory of his father’s vision, Saafir felt the moment of doubt pass, and recommitted to his duties. He couldn’t back off from the trade agreement. Too much was at stake. Saafir didn’t want his countrymen hurt by destructive acts of protestors, but he wouldn’t cave to the demands of Rabah Wasam, whose motives were driven by revenge. Halting the trade agreement would make the statement that the royal family was breakable when pressed hard enough. In its current fragile state, they couldn’t afford to show weakness.
Saafir swirled his tea. It had long ago gone cold. His body ached. A doctor had assessed him earlier in the day as a follow-up to the shooting and said he needed more rest. Finding rest was difficult. At night, when he lay in bed, sleep eluded him. He had the welfare of an entire nation sitting on his shoulders. It was difficult to know the right actions to take and it was getting harder and harder to see around corners. The last good night of sleep he’d had was spent with Sarah.
