“I don’t think I know how to play.”
“I’ll show you.” Game on.
* * *
I walked into the office at half past seven the next morning, feeling like the very air around me had changed. It smelled sweeter. The birds were chirping good morning to me all the way into the building. The azure dawn of a great day in Cantelli land enveloped me in giant wings as I had left my GMC, heralding new strides in happiness. The aches and pains of yesteryear were barely noticeable. Even meeting with Lois would not wreck this new Karma of enlightenment.
Surprisingly, Shelly was there at her desk already. “Good morning, Ms. Fontenot.”
She glowered at me, trying to pierce my happy high. “I heard you were entertaining at the beach house on Sunday, playing host to movie stars. I thought we were friends. You could have invited me along. Was Karen afraid I’d look better in a bikini?”
The main reason was I didn’t want Lois’s Igor with me. The moment Lo found out Shelly made any invite list with me, she would be wired for audio and video. Not happenin’. I tried some light hearted banter. “I will host a bikini contest next Sunday, Shell. You’ll need to have a string to compete. That’s what Karen wore.”
Shelly gasped, and then giggled. “You’re right. I don’t own a string bikini. I bet I’d look good in one.”
“I bet you would, but if your kids ever saw you in it, they would torture you about it for months.”
Shelly leaned back in her chair, shaking her head. “Oh yeah. They would hound me without letup. Okay… no bikini contests. How about-”
“Cantelli!”
I jerked a thumb at Lois’s office. “I hear my eight o’clock getting restless. Get to work, Moneypenny.”
“Yes, James,” Shelly bowed slightly in deference to my very good James Bond voice.
I walked into Lois’s office with my usual deference to the mean girl. I can confront the harpy better than anyone, including her husband Frank, but I pick my spots. It’s insanity to beard the lioness in her den. I sat across from her with a big smile.
“Good morning, Lo.”
“Never mind the good morning crap. Get on with it, or I’ll be serving toasted Cantelli for breakfast. Impress me.”
I straightened in my seat. I didn’t like the look on Lois’s face. It may be my sojourn with sister Karen had put her jaw out of joint. Too bad. My guess would be she howled at the moon until the wee hours of the morning because the thought of info out of her grasp ruined her sleepy time “We had a nice day of it right on the beach, Lo. We were joined suddenly by Cheech Garibaldi and two of his thugs.”
Lois nearly knocked her computer on the floor hunching forward at her desk. “Jesus, Mary, and Joseph, I’m impressed.”
I went on in intricate detail describing what took place after they appeared. Lo did not move a muscle until I finished. “So, what do you think, partner? Case by case with the Garibaldi crime family?”
“Damn, Rick, I have to start treating you better. I thought we were winging our way into the golden years of death before these past few months. I hate it that your old skank may have triggered it, but the juices are flowing now, cupcake. I figured we’d go on taking a few pictures and providing fodder for divorce lawyers over a few more years. Now, we’re working out a few times a week, hosting an old time movie set night at our own restaurant, killing bad guys like in the old days, schmoozing with movie stars, and getting hired by east coast crime families for legit enterprises. You’ve hit the mother lode of geezer excitement, brother.”
“Hey, you’re keeping my head in the game, Lo. We’re on a hell of a roller coaster ride, and the ups and downs are a little rough. Like you say though, we were phoning it in before Stacy. I like Temple. She’s the whole package. If anyone in today’s Hollywood idiots will come out on the other end with a good life, my money’s on her.”
Lois nodded in agreement. “I hope she didn’t go home today and get to thinking too much on the Garibaldi visit. I love the idea of her and Karen doing a duet with a new ‘Sam’. When I told Frank about it, he nearly came unglued. He thinks we should make over the restaurant even more with the Casablanca theme.”
Wow, it takes a lot to get Frank’s juices flowing. I like it. “I’m glad Frank’s getting into our restaurant endeavor. He’s the best thing that ever happened to you, harpy.”
Lois smiled. “Yeah, he is. Okay, back to business. Yes on the case by case with the Garibaldi deal. Don’t think I’m forgetting how much it means to you not needing eyes in the back of your head looking for hit-men. You’re golden with me for the day, Rick. I’m giving you my sister. God bless you both. Now, let’s talk about your new hire, T-bone. I have a case you’d like, and it would be a first class intro for our newest employee on a ride along.”
So much for the afterglow of shared goodness. “I’m listening.”
“You know Nick Pitini. We’ve been using him as an informant for decades, so I won’t bore you with why this or that. He has someone trying to lean on him and I don’t like it. A new bunch of thugs have moved into his area, and are beginning to bleed all the small business owners. It’s the usual. If the owner refuses to cough up a percentage every week for protection, small fires, broken glass, and customer intimidation follow. They’re pros. No one wants to talk to the PD. Nick met with me in secret, outlining the way they’re operating. He’s paying right now, but he’s pissed. He wants to get out his shotgun and blast the crap out of them when they walk in the next time. You and I know he’ll be in prison, and the scam will continue. Want a piece?”
Oh hell yeah. Nick Pitini is the salt of the earth. His pawn shop has been around for decades. He keeps his eyes open and his mouth shut. When he gets a guy pawning suspicious merchandise that looks like trouble, he sends the HD pictures his state of the art security system takes. Yes, our state of the art security system. “I’m in. You’re right. I’ll find out if T-bone is ready to take on something like this. I’ll go create an introductory file for my confidential informant cover, and send it over to Bill. He hates this crap as bad as we do.”
“You have to be careful, Rick. The city is going to exile us to Alaska if you kill anybody else. I know this shit’s not your fault, but you know as well as I do that if you had treated the Garibaldi mob to a sandy death, the state would have locked you up and thrown away the key.”
I saw the slight upturn at Lois’s mouth. “You want in on the firefight.”
“Damn straight.”
“It still won’t do me any good, but like you said, we have to play these geezer windfalls out. I’ll take T-bone and begin the preliminaries this morning, introducing him to the area, and all the ramifications of going against professional protection peddlers.”
“Are you going to try a quick smack down entry into the game if you see a target?”
“Yep. I’m only going that route if T-bone knows the risks though. He’s like a hand grenade. I have to be careful where I pull the pin. We’ll work on his anger management issues. He did a stint in the army in Iraq, so I know he’s capable with firearms. He told me the night we spent in jail together he was in combat.”
“Did you believe him?”
Lo knows there’s a difference between combat and war stories. “He’s seen action. Some of his story was meant to impress me, but he has the look. The tough part is keeping him from doing something on the job that will land him in jail or saddle us with a lawsuit. I’ve been keeping Cleaver busy lately.”
“It’s about time that old ambulance chaser earned his retainer,” Lois replied. “I like your plan. Let me know how Bill likes it.”
“I will.”
“So you and Karen are getting serious, huh?”
Uh oh. “We’re getting along. I doubt she has anything of a serious nature in mind for me, but with your blessing, I’m sure she’ll give me a call more often. Can I tell her you won’t bill her anymore?”
Lo grinned. “I’ll give her a twenty percent discount.”
“Ge
e, that’s sweet of you. You really got her yesterday.”
The cackle returned. “I knew it. I’m beginning to get more comfortable with you wedded to my sister. She’s still young enough to have a kid. I wouldn’t mind being Aunt Lo to a little Cantelli. I’d be able to get her or him trained right before you two dodo’s ruin the kid.”
There’s a revelation – Lo marrying me off to her sister. “That would never work and you know it. We’re not only from different worlds, Karen and I are from different dimensions. She’s from Planet Hollywood, and I’m from the Twilight Zone. That’s nice that your biological clock works for your sister though.”
“You could do worse. She’s always busy, and she already has money. It would be a formal arrangement. Karen has your kid. Then you two stay out of each other’s way for the rest of your lives, meeting only for the kid’s sporting events, and whenever she wants to boink you.”
I laughed. “I never knew what a romantic you were, Lo. As I said, Karen is not serious about me. She’s been trying to help Jadie seduce me as an entertainment exercise.”
“Karen will do what I tell her to do. She’s my bitch. Karen will be the legal one, and you can pop out another kid with Jadie on the sly.”
We both hooted over that comment. “I better get going. I’ll bring in a copy of the file I give Bill before I leave.”
“What are you going to do about Shelly?”
“Not a thing. Why? Are you pimping me out for her too?”
Lo shrugged. “She’s got it bad for you. Ever since we caught you banging Jadie in your sleep, I think Shelly’s been panting for you.”
I gave her a wave off on the way out. “She’ll have to get me in her sleep.”
Chapter 18: Protection Racket
T-bone and I peered at my laptop computer screen with interest. Three guys entered Nick Pitini’s pawn shop. We watched them on our camera feeds go directly to the enclosed cage where the owner worked. Nick had been running Pitini’s Pawn for over two decades. He was a favorite client of ours. He bought our best security package, and upgraded whenever we advised it. We had Steve check on him at least once a week. This was the first time he’s been in real trouble. It was time for Madigan & Cantelli to earn our money.
“So we’re going to bust these clowns, huh?”
“We’re going to make a statement.” I explained all the unintended consequences such a statement can cause. “Keep your nightstick handy. We don’t use spray inside unless absolutely necessary. We have them on video. I plan to know them better by the end of the day than anyone knows them. You ready?”
“Hell yeah! It’ll be just like you say, Rick. We’ll introduce ourselves, and make sure they know we mean business. Let’s do this before they start tearing your friend’s shop apart.”
I like T-bone. I’m hoping this all works out well. We got out and entered the pawn shop. The three thugs were still yelling at Nick, with hand gestures and all. The operation may be owned by a pro, but these three were strictly cheap labor. I led the way. The largest one intercepted me. He was around six and a half feet tall, beard stubble, and black hair tied in a ponytail… lots of black hair.
“We’re closed. Come back tomorrow.”
I zapped him. He hit the floor vibrating like a live big tuna on the grill. I ain’t messing around with these idiots. I’m already pissed off they made Nick’s life miserable. The second one starts at me, and T-bone drops him with one beauty of a left hook, forgetting all about my coaching urging spray and stun-guns instead of breakable hands. I move onto the third thug, a ratty assed, pock marked, clown with shaved head, tats and piercings.
“Here’s the deal, Ace. I want to know who is sending second rate morons like you and these two out playing the protection racket. Answer me, and I don’t deep fry you. Hesitate, and I zap your balls until they glow in the dark.”
“No!” Pock-face jams back against Nick’s cage with his hands in surrendering, placating form. “Teddy Alvarez… he’s working the racket.”
“Turn around, hands behind your back.” I plastic tied him while taking out my iPhone and FaceTiming Lo. I made sure she got sent nice photos of all three. “Can you take care of alerting Bill, Lo? Get back to me with how he wants to go about this. It’s Teddy Alvarez’s game.”
“Shit! That’s not good, Rick. Let’s retire, and get Nick to go with us.”
I laughed until even T-bone was laughing with me, and he had no clue what I was laughing about. “It was a blessed adventure in geezer land this morning, but suddenly it’s retirement time now, huh?”
Lo cackled while giving me her mea culpa hand signal. “Sorry, Rick. Teddy Alvarez would kill his own mamma if she crossed him. I’ve already forwarded your pictures. Restrain them and find out if Nick wants to go to the mattresses with this.”
“Will do.”
“Your hand okay T-bone?”
T-bone flexed his deadly left without pain. “Yeah, Rick. No problem. What was so funny?”
“Just Lois making a joke out of our procedure in this case. Teddy Alvarez is a problem. He’s not some street thug. He hires them.” I made a waiting gesture at T-bone. I plastic tied our other participants, beginning to struggle into consciousness. I then pulled T-bone off to the side, indicating Nick should stay where he was. “Teddy is a bad dude, Bone. He’s the type of asshole that reaches out with his minions to kill everything you love when you cross him. This is a perfect test case for what you’re comfortable with. This is a shitty business, my friend… and dangerous. I can shift you to our installs only crew, and the pay is still good.”
T-bone looks a little taken aback by my bluntness. “Well damn, Rick…what do you do?”
“Wind up in jail cells overnight with guys I’ve taken into custody.”
T-bone laughed for more than a few seconds. “Good answer. What else?”
I shrug. “I have no family, a few close friends, and nothing else, Bone. I take on thugs like Teddy because no one else can. Nick’s worked this pawn shop into a neighborhood force. He’s legit, and he does everything he can to make things better. He’s a brother in arms to me, and I’ll be dead before I let him down.”
T-bone pumped his fist. “Yeah! That’s what I’m talkin’ about. I’ll tell Carlene and my Mom about the risks. I want in, Rick.”
“I won’t sugar coat this for you, Bone. You only know how committed you are when your loved ones get threatened. My loved ones mean a lot to me, but they’re second hand. I admit I don’t get close with anyone as a rule. Alvarez is bad news. We insert ourselves in his protection game, and we’re at risk, along with friends and family.”
“I haven’t done one damn useful thing since getting out of the service. I want this. Does Steve work this end of the business?”
“Only Lo and I take this type heavy action on. Steve has a wife who hates everything we do. He’s come home with his face rearranged a few times from doing things like ignoring the Cantelli rule: no fist fighting. Hey, what do you know, you and Steve have something in common.”
T-bone chuckled and shrugged. “Point taken. How do you and Lois go after a guy like Alvarez?”
“Since you’re interested, I’ll show you. Let’s finish this first step, and see how Nick’s doing.”
We return to our three squirming dolts. Nick is smiling. He enjoyed the show immensely.
“God, Rick, that was so good! That was a hell of a left, young man,” Nick tells T-bone. Nick’s about five feet eight in his socks, wiry, and grizzled looking. He has a few years on me, and keeps his remaining hair buzz cut into white stubble. “What’s our next move?”
“Lois needs to know if you want to go to the mattresses on this.”
Nick lets out a snorting laugh at Lois’s ‘Godfather’ reference. “Hell yeah, I do, and I know Teddy Alvarez. I have three choices, cut and run, let him bleed me into forking over the business to him, or face him down. The third one gives me a chance to keep something I’ve worked like a dog building. That’s the way I’m going. I’l
l testify or do anything you need. I’ll talk to the other owners around here too, but they’re scared shitless, and that’s before I tell them whose leaning on them.”
“We’ll add a couple touches to your system here and at your house then, Nick. Hang on.” I FaceTime Lo.
“Speak, old one.”
Oh, she’s a riot. T-bone sees and hears the greeting with appreciation. “Nick and Bone are in all the way. How’d you make out with Bill.”
“He’s excited. Your intro file got him thinking this operation might be doable. The pictures made his day. Those three are imported from LA. It seems Teddy rotates out of town muscle so no one ever sees the same guys. Staley says the game has been working all too well for him. He’s waiting to hear about Nick’s willingness to testify. I told him about Garibaldi too. That shocked the hell out him. He asked me if it wouldn’t have been a better idea to put a couple weeks between pissing off crime families.”
Bill has a point. “Is he available?”
“Just waiting to hear if he should come over there.”
“We’re ready. I’ll give the thugs the message to take with them for when Alvarez posts bail. I’ll go through Nick’s video feeds from the office, update the confidential informant file, and then download all the pertinent info on a flash drive for Bill. I’ll drop everything off with him later. The week is sure starting out with a bang. Like Bill said, it sure didn’t take me long to find a replacement crime boss who’ll want me dead.”
“I’ll be in touch.”
I went over and propped my three would be gumbas against the counter wall. I put a business card into each man’s pocket. “Nick’s Pawn Shop is already under the protection of Madigan & Cantelli Security, guys. We don’t need any help, and we don’t take on partners. Let Teddy know it’s not personal, it’s just business.”
“He’s going to cut you into little pieces, Cantelli,” Pock-face told me.
“That wouldn’t be wise. See, once my contact, Captain Bill Staley, from the San Diego police department gets here, I will be filling him in on everything. If anything happens to me or mine, he will be coming to collect Teddy. I have a new friend, Cheech Garibaldi. He’s going legit, and wants me to look into his enterprises on the west coast when he needs something checked out. Cheech is going straight. Maybe it’s time for Teddy to do the same thing.”
Rick Cantelli, P.I. (Rick Cantelli, P.I. Detectives Book 1) Page 24
