“Of course,” he said with a nod. “I cannot blame you, then.”
They listened to Miss Filbee flatten a high note before Gabriel sat down upon the empty seat next to her.
“Still, I should have liked to hear you perform.”
Charlotte shook her head. “I do not think you would have.”
“Why is that?”
She focused upon Miss Filbee, who frowned in her direction. “I am afraid I do not have Miss Filbee’s talent for the pianoforte.”
“Forgive me if I do not believe you.”
“Oh, no, it is true,” she said, nodding earnestly. “My parents encouraged me with lessons as a child, but I fear they did not keep. I know only one song, and even that, I do not play well.”
“Would you be willing to play for me at Greyston Hall?” Gabriel asked her. “No wolves would be present, excepting myself, of course.”
Charlotte smiled. “And when you discover I am as dreadful as I have proclaimed?”
“Well, at least you will have warned me.”
She glanced up to see a handsome smile gracing his lips before a movement across the room caught her eye, and she saw Mr. Cropp brazenly wink at her.
Charlotte looked away with a grimace, and she leaned back in her chair so Gabriel’s large stature might hide her from the creeping man’s view for the rest of the performances.
However, as conversations occurred once more around the room, she noticed Mr. Cropp heading in her direction, and dread filled her.
“Miss Rosebury,” he said upon reaching them, his light-colored eyebrows high upon his forehead, “I cannot express to you how very disappointed I was to have not heard you perform this evening, as I am certain you play divinely.”
Charlotte did her best to force a cordial smile upon her face, but when Miss Filbee joined them, threading her hands through Mr. Cropp’s and Gabriel’s arms, she nearly rolled her eyes.
“Here you both are,” Miss Filbee said, her round eyes looking at the gentlemen. “Tell me, did you enjoy my performances? I have been told I have the loveliest singing voice in all of Yorkshire.”
“I highly enjoyed it, Miss Filbee,” Mr. Cropp said.
Charlotte glanced to Gabriel whose brows had lowered over his widened, disbelieving eyes, and she stifled her laughter before Miss Filbee looked at her.
“Why do you smile, Miss Rosebury?” she asked with narrowed eyes.
Charlotte hesitated. “I was merely recalling your performance. You have quite the talent, Miss Filbee.”
The young woman sighed. “Yes, well, I suppose you must think everybody plays well. My cousin has told me you visit from a small town, so I daresay, you do not hear natural talent very often in your society.”
Before Charlotte could hear another word, she walked away from the group to join another, remaining away from the contention of the others until they finally departed.
The moment she entered the Worthington’s carriage, relief filled her, though she remained silent for most of their journey home and subsequent walks to their rooms.
Mrs. Worthington, on the other hand, chattered on about the fine food they had eaten and how long she had spoken with Mr. Lacey about his upcoming sermon, until she had turned down the hallway leading to her bedroom and bade goodnight over her shoulder, disappearing around the corner.
“Shall we continue?” Gabriel asked Charlotte, and the two of them walked in silence until she looked up to see a frown upon his brow.
“Is something on your mind, Mr. Worthington?” she asked.
“Indeed, I wanted to apologize for this evening. Had I not mentioned…” he broke off with a sigh. “No one should be treated as you were, Miss Rosebury, and I am sorry I did not come to your defense.”
Surprised at his sudden apology, Charlotte stopped walking and waited until Gabriel did the same before staring up at him.
“You are in no way to blame, Mr. Worthington,” she said. “And you did come to my defense, multiple times, as I recall.”
Gabriel averted his gaze. “I should have done something further to end their words.”
“Please, do not trouble yourself,” Charlotte said. “I assure you, this was not the first time, nor certainly the last, that I will be teased for my fear of horses.”
They stood in silence before Gabriel, still frowning, motioned ahead of them.
“May I see you to your room?” he asked.
“Of course.”
They continued on for a few moments in silence before Gabriel said, “If you do not mind my asking…”
“Yes?” she urged.
“I was merely wondering if you could tell me as to why you do fear horses.”
Gabriel regretted his questioning the moment Charlotte’s eyes widened with alarm, and he shook his head.
“Forgive me,” he said. “I should not have asked you such a question.”
“No,” she said, “it is all right. My fear was born many years ago, and I have since attempted to disregard it, but I suppose I have not done so very well.”
They reached her bedroom door, and they paused outside of it.
“I do not mean to pry.”
“I know,” Charlotte responded with a smile, and he listened closely when her gaze dropped to the floor, her expression sobering as her tale began.
“As I have mentioned before,” she said, “my father taught me how to ride when I was very young, taking Julia and me out into the fields until we became quite proficient.
“When I was nine, however, my father’s brother visited Brightwood with his wife and their only child, my elder cousin, Helena. One day, Helena and I decided to ride together without a chaperone, though our fathers had forbidden it. We had convinced a young boy in the stables to ready the horses before we rode off alone across the fields.
“In the beginning, our ride passed by without incident, and we were proud of our accomplishment. However, a shot soon rang out in the distance, a poacher on Brightwood’s grounds, and I screamed with surprise at the noise.
“Our horses shuffled to and fro, my own rearing on its hind legs before I fell upon my back. As I attempted to regain my breathing, I heard my cousin’s intermittent screams behind me, so I struggled to my knees in time to witness both of our horses tearing across the field side-by-side in the direction of Brightwood.
“But I could not find her until after her screaming had stopped, and I looked down to the horses’ legs.”
Gabriel’s brows pulled closer together as Charlotte continued the horrific tale.
“Helena,” she said, “she was lifeless as she was pulled facedown underneath both horses’ hooves, her foot caught and twisted within the stirrup.
“I remember scrambling to my feet, stumbling and sliding as I attempted to catch up to the horses, screaming their names, Helena’s, over and over again in a desperate attempt to stop them, but nothing helped.”
As the tears rolled down Charlotte’s cheeks, Gabriel fought the urge to wipe them away, at last understanding the cause of her fears.
“By the time I reached Brightwood,” she said, “I could hear the screams of my aunt and the sobs of my uncle. Members of the household circled around them as a few footmen pulled the skittish horses away from the commotion.
“Mother and Father stood near the gathered crowd with tears streaming down their faces, embracing one another before they spotted me gasping for breath as I ran toward them.
“Father rushed up to me, wrapping me in his arms and shielding my eyes from Helena’s body as they looked over me, asking me if I was all right and what had happened.
“I barely managed to speak through my cries, for sorrow had overcome me, as well as the guilt I would allow into my heart to gnaw away at me for years to come.
“They assured me I was not to be blamed, but what was I, a girl of nine years, to think when I was foolish enough to ride without a chaperone and not strong enough to control the horses and save my cousin’s life? I knew it was my fault, for I had screamed, I ha
d spooked the horses, and I hated myself because of it.”
She paused, and Gabriel wished he could ease the pain he saw so clearly in her eyes.
“How did you overcome your guilt?” he asked, his voice soft.
“Love,” she said after a pause. “Love helped me more than time, forgiveness, even regret. Love from my Aunt and Uncle who have never once put the fault of their only child’s death upon me. Love from Julia even when bitterness controlled my heart, her enthusiasm for life never faltering. And love from my parents.”
Gabriel watched as her eyes took on a faraway look.
“I had become quite depressed, allowed myself to wallow in my despair and dwell on what had occurred, blaming myself. However, I will always remember the day my mother spoke to me, telling me that I had a choice. I could allow the terrible incident to affect the rest of my life, or I could choose to rise above and become a better person. She asked me what I would wish for Helena to do, had our lives been switched, and I knew then, I was living my life in the wrong way.
“So I changed. It was not easy, for even now I still dwell on what has occurred, but rather than berating myself, I choose to live my life more positively than before. I smiled, even when I did not feel like it, and I realized that I could make others happy by being happy myself.
“Ever since then, I have tried to live a wonderful life in memory of my cousin. For I know, had I been the one to die, I would have wanted her to do the same.”
Charlotte looked up at Gabriel, and her heart flipped when she noticed his intense gaze already upon her.
“Thank you, Miss Rosebury,” he said. “I am certain it is not easy to speak of such a horrific occurrence, but I appreciate your willingness to do so. I am impressed with what you have done already with the horses here. I would not blame you should you wish to remain away, but I wonder, would you be willing to join me in the stables tomorrow morning?”
Charlotte smiled, feeling oddly confident after having shared her story with the gentleman, and she nodded.
“I would like to very much,” she said before glancing away. “Thank you, Mr. Worthington, for your kindness, now and earlier at the dinner party. I would not have enjoyed myself without your companionship.”
“Are you certain you are all right after how you were treated?” he asked.
“Indeed. I have almost forgotten their words entirely.”
“I have not,” he said, his brow furrowing. “Their actions…I found it difficult to remain a gentleman on more than one occasion this evening.”
“And I, a lady,” Charlotte responded. “They were excessive with their remarks.”
“Yes, but their actions merely reveal the jealousy they both possess.”
Charlotte laughed wryly. “Oh, yes, I am certain Miss Bosville is quite envious, indeed, of a woman with too much passion for William Shakespeare and too great a fear of horses to be considered an accomplished female.”
Gabriel simply stared at her, the candlelight nearby flickering its reflection within his light blue eyes.
“You cannot possibly believe them to be jealous of me,” she continued, “can you, Mr. Worthington?”
“Indeed, I can,” he said, “and I do.”
“However could you defend such an idea?”
“If only you could see what I do,” Gabriel said softly before he took a step toward her, “then you might understand how envious they are of your agreeable nature, your intelligence, wit, and charm. Your confidence appearing even in the face of criticism.”
Charlotte’s breathing was forgotten completely when Gabriel reached forth his hand to brush the back of his fingers against her cheek.
“And I, for one,” he said with a soft voice, “enjoy your rose-colored complexion…”
His fingers moved slowly until they gently touched her lips.
“For your blush merely adds to your beauty.”
When his eyes moved to hers, Charlotte saw the instant change occur, the cold returning to his heart, and Gabriel took a step back.
“Forgive me,” he said, and he turned around and disappeared down the hallway, leaving Charlotte to wonder if the gentleman would ever have enough courage to stop running away.
Chapter Fourteen
Gabriel approached the stables the next morning with a heavy heart, for, after his eyes had scanned the grounds before him, Charlotte was nowhere to be seen.
Why should she have joined you? he thought. You deserve no such consideration after your behavior last night.
His head hung low as he entered the stables, and he rounded the corner, intending to rid himself of his thoughts with a ride, when he looked up to see Charlotte herself standing before him, and his feet stopped in their tracks.
“You came,” he said, surprise evident in his tone.
Charlotte jumped, pulling her hand away from Horatio’s forelock as she faced Gabriel.
“Mr. Worthington,” she said with a smile, “I did not hear you come in.”
Gabriel did not respond, only moved slowly toward her.
“Was I not supposed to be here?” she asked. “I thought, well, it is just that, last night, you said—”
“No, no, of course,” he said. “You were right in coming. I am only happy to see you.”
Charlotte smiled, and Gabriel struggled to keep from stroking the dimples upon her cheeks, focusing instead upon the horse standing nearby as he attempted to smother his feelings.
Feelings, he thought with disbelief, feelings for Miss Rosebury?
He looked to Charlotte’s smiling face again, but he could no longer deny that he did have feelings for her, and strong ones that could not simply be set aside.
“Are you all right, Mr. Worthington?” Charlotte asked, her smile faltering under Gabriel’s intense gaze.
“Indeed,” he said before lifting the latch on Horatio’s door. “Are you ready?”
“Yes,” she said, somewhat anxious. “What will you have me do today?”
“I thought we might go out into the paddock to lead Horatio around for a moment or two.”
“All right.”
She eyed the width of Gabriel’s shoulders as he attached a spare lead onto the horse’s halter before turning around and offering the lead to her.
“Oh, no, I do not think I can,” she said, blinking away the vision of Gabriel’s handsome stature.
He merely nodded before they walked down the aisle of horses’ stalls, soon reaching the paddock at the far end of the stables.
“Would you, perhaps, like to walk on the other side of him?” Gabriel asked as they entered the enclosed area.
“I prefer a barrier to be between us, thank you.”
“Of course,” Gabriel said, “but might I suggest something in an effort to help?”
After Charlotte nodded, Gabriel continued. “If you are able to, recall your childhood, how you behaved long before the accident. Were you frightened of horses then?”
“No, of course not.”
“Because you were confident around them?”
“Indeed.”
“Then,” Gabriel continued, “you must regain your confidence.”
Charlotte sighed. “You are correct, Mr. Worthington, but it is not so simple to reclaim confidence in something I have feared for so long.”
“I understand, however…” he trailed off, his eyes focusing upon her before he continued, “ ‘a faint heart dies a thousand times before his death, but the valiant taste of death but once.’ ”
Charlotte could not help the smile spreading across her lips. “Do you quote Shakespeare to me, Mr. Worthington?” she asked.
“Indeed, I do.”
“Very impressive, sir,” she said before raising her brows in a teasing manner. “However, I fear you have misquoted him. I do believe he says ‘coward’ rather than ‘faint heart’.”
“Ah, now that was intentional,” Gabriel said, “for I thought it unkind to call you a coward.”
They shared a smile before his expression
grew serious.
“And after hearing your story last night,” he said, “I would be wrong to call you anything less than fearless.”
Unexpected tears filled Charlotte’s eyes, and she averted her gaze so Gabriel might not see her emotion. “Very well, Mr. Worthington. You have managed to convince me.”
She reached for the lead with trembling fingers before Gabriel handed over control of the horse, moving to her other side so she stood in the middle.
“Allow him to feel your courage,” he said, “as he will rely upon you to keep him safe.”
Charlotte closed her eyes, calmed her breathing, and allowed Gabriel’s words to echo throughout her mind before taking a step forward, and to her great surprise and delight, Horatio moved next to her.
“You see?” Gabriel said as Charlotte looked up at him with an excited smile. “You have already found your confidence. Watch how he follows your leadership.”
Charlotte looked to see the horse’s lowered head nearly level with her own, his gate slow and steady next to her, and she could not help but think of how natural it felt for her to be leading a horse once more, as she had done so often as a child.
“Would you like to ride him?”
Charlotte stopped, and Horatio followed her lead.
“I fear I am not wearing the proper clothing for riding,” she said.
“We shall stay within the paddock with only myself leading.”
“I do not know,” she said, but as she saw the strength and understanding within Gabriel’s eyes, she found herself nodding.
Before she knew it, Horatio was fitted into a sidesaddle and reins, and Gabriel stood before her, bending low with his fingers laced to form a makeshift footstool.
“Do you recall how to mount?” he asked.
“Yes.”
“Horatio is tied to the fence,” Gabriel said, “and I am right here. I will not leave your side.”
Charlotte nodded, biting her lip before placing a foot into Gabriel’s hands, and effortlessly, he hoisted her up until she sat softly upon the saddle, her nerves increasing when she felt the horse shift beneath her.
To Warm A Wintered Heart (Regency Romance) Page 15
