by Belvin, Love
“Impatient, kitten?” I asked rhetorically.
She knew not to speak unless permitted to. Instead the small of her back arched and bowed. That ripped a silent chuckle from my chest. In moments like this I knew I was meant to be her master—in the bedroom sense, as we all know Who the ultimate Master is—and she’s my submissive. We may not play in the traditional manner, taking our conduct outside of our private, shared time, but we’d certainly developed the power exchange synchronization. In here, Alexis relinquished her control to me, and I didn’t disappoint, neither would I. The front of my pants tented with my excitement as I secured her wrists.
I mounted the bed behind her and pressed my clothed cock in the seam of her cheeks. Alexis spread her hips wider to accept me. I swiped my teeth with my tongue as I covered her naked back, extending myself to position my mouth to the side of her face. Alexis’ eyelids squeezed together and she bit that bottom lip.
I spoke directly into her ear. “Now, kitten, I’ve begun the process of forgiving you for your many breaches, but that doesn’t absolve you from the issuance of appropriate punishment. Do you understand me? You may speak.”
“Yes, si-sir.” She writhed beneath me.
“Very well.” I sat up on my knees, unable to ignore the rippling in my own vocals. I was so affected. “I am not going to use any implements and will dole them out quicker, so you need to hang on. Okay?”
She swung her bountiful hips in the air, nodded her head with enthusiasm simultaneously. The sound of my palm hitting her right mound rivaled Raheem’s note.
“If I didn’t want you to speak I would have gagged you, kitten!” I bellowed.
Alexis squealed as she pulled against the chain. Her hips narrowed for seconds long before opening again in keen need.
“Yesssss,” she whispered with a tremble. “siiir!”
I swallowed hard and thought to remove my pants. They were now holding my erection hostage painfully. I didn’t delay once I returned. I smacked her left cheek with swift force. Alexis grunted, expressing what I knew was painful. My next blow was to the back of her meaty thigh. I felt the tingle in my hand from that one. She pulled back from the wrist restraints and shrieked a stifled cry. I didn’t use full force when spanking Alexis. I took my time learning her tolerance and developed measured blows. My intent has never been to hurt her. The purpose has been to stimulate her.
And stimulated she clearly was based on the way she arched her back after the third strike to her left thigh. She moaned felinely. Unabashed. My heart beat violently in my chest, excitement shot through me watching Alexis’ response to me. The fourth and fifth lashes came in quick succession.
“My God, you’re dripping,” I groaned while swiping her pussy with my fingers.
Her moans grew uncontrolled and her hips reared into me, begging for her release. No longer able to delay, I took myself in my hands and traced her weeping lips, coating my engorged dick. Alexis yelped when I breached her opening. I rammed until I was at her back wall. Holding her tight at the small of her back, I took a moment to gain myself. Alexis was less patient as she began grinding on me, although minimally. When I loosened my grip, she quickly took the liberty to thrust more.
“Ah!” croaked from her lips and her cheeks smacked into my pelvis.
“Christ, Alexis!” ripped from my lungs as I took her at the hips, lifting her from the mattress. “You didn’t ask permission to come!”
I drove into her hard and with wild abandon until her cries turned into whimpers and I knew her orgasm had met its nadir. I was out of breath from the gusto and passion of it all. Her uncontrolled response to me thrilled me to no end; otherwise, I’d be dismayed by her inability to follow my rule regarding her release. With reduced speed I continued my thrusts into her. I didn’t know how long I’d be able to hold out. It had been a few days. Since our return from Kamigu, outside when I withheld sex to punish her, the only time Alexis and I didn’t indulge daily was when she was on her period. I was not averse to taking her in that condition, but had not because I’d already piled enough on her plate with my proclivities.
My hips began to take off in speed, my groin lightening with pleasure. I tightened my grip on Alexis, preparing to blast off. She started rocking out of sync with my thrust then she mewled.
Abruptly I pulled out of her only to hear her whimper, this time on a sigh.
“What is it, kitten,” I asked out of panicking concern, though it was delivered angrily.
“Permission to speak,” she squealed.
“Speak!”
“I want to turn around and watch you…” her voice faltered.
My mind raced a few seconds before I sighed, wiping my forehead. Alexis could never verbalize that she wanted to see my expression as I came in her. She got off on that for some reason. I didn’t understand it, but used it to my advantage in seducing her. I reached over and freed her from the restraints. She quickly flipped onto her back throwing her legs in the air. My dick bobbed at the visual of Alexis’ greediness. Her eyes rolled back in anticipation as she held the back of her thighs with her hands.
I plunged into her, filling her to the hilt before I pulled out completely and worked my way in with ginger thrusts. My body tensed as my shoulders held her thighs down and back. I felt Alexis clamp me like a vice. Her orgasm inspired my spry thrusts. I was so wrapped in lust from hearing my balls slap into her flesh I couldn’t scold her about her second violation tonight. I was instantly hurled into my own release. Goose bumps coated my skin and my heart felt about to explode as my balls drew up and I shot forcefully into her.
“Oh!” Alexis screamed as though it was her release.
I could hear that faintly over the clamorous bellowing in my head. When the fog receded I felt tugging on my chin and warmth on my back. I was able to open my lids but marginally and saw Alexis rub the side of her face against my beard, alternating cheeks as she breathed wildly like a puppy. Her small arms pinned me to her chest and thighs clamped my waist. I froze over her, in plank position.
Something was off.
This was wrong.
Alexis’ greediness had reached a level of desperate supplication. That revelation evoked an unusual panic in me as my cock lay heavily inside of her, throbbing.
What is this?
She sensed my unease and froze herself. I beseeched with my eyes what I could not with my mouth; I couldn’t find my voice.
Her eyes went wild and she licked her lips as she contemplated. Her arms and legs released me. I pulled out of her and felt a chill course my spine at the action of leaving her heated and snug cove. I lay next to her, my face to the ceiling. Alexis rested next to me in the same position. Above our breathing only Raheem could be heard for countless minutes as I attempted to decipher what had just taken place.
“Ezra,” she called out, uncertainty played at her chords.
My eyes ranged over to her. I was so heightened, disoriented I couldn’t rebuke her for yet another infraction: how she should address me.
She licked her lips fortifying herself. Then her eyes shifted to meet mine.
“Can we go catch a movie?”
“Movie?” I grunted, confused.
Alexis’ eyes returned to the ceiling as she nodded. “Every fall I go to the movies alone. I haven’t gone yet.” She swallowed. “I wanna see Before I Wake with Kate Bosworth.”
That request left me bewildered. The movies? To watch it? I didn’t even know she enjoyed Hollywood films. I couldn’t imagine her having the time before she graduated school.
“I can’t recall my last trip to a silver screen theater.”
“What other theater do you visit?” Her eyes were on me again.
“Broadway…and off.” I murmured contemplatively in the air. “I haven’t done that all year.”
“I’d like to attend one with you one day,” she requested so softly I didn’t recognize her voice.
Alexis’ demeanor had transformed to something demure, bashful, dainty, and ye
t forthcoming. Something happened. There was a shifting between us and I was left to wonder if it was something new or a change that had been in the process and I somehow missed it. I didn’t pretend to understand it at all.
“Su-sure.” I agreed, a ball lodged in my throat.
I felt her head swing over to face me.
“Thank you,” she murmured before facing the ceiling.
As we lay there under some awful spell, I felt her shaky fingers crawl over mine until they clasped. Hesitantly, I gave a slight squeeze.
The following Saturday, after completing my morning ninjutsu class where my body endured a therapeutic beating, Alexis and I attended the movie. It was not a shared-gratifying experience, but I was content to have met another need of hers. In fact, after a five-hour session in the sandbox the day after, she convinced me to attend another matinée with her the following Saturday. It was intrusive of my sermon preparation time, but another attempt at making her feel some elusive connection to me she’d expressed grievances of.
Keeping in mind her expressed desire of wanting to ‘know me’—a ridiculous aspiration considering she shared a bed with me every night and my most valued and exclusive pastime—one Saturday when I completed my Sunday sermon early, I invited Alexis and Ms. Remah with me to a local farm a few miles away from my home. Alexis spoke of her one autumn activity; I had one myself: apple picking. I’d make my way out to the farm in early October to pick apples, pumpkins, gourds, and other fall favorites. I’d spend hours wandering the mazes and fields, taking my time selecting produce. I’d leave with baskets and boxes full, far more than a single man needed. I never used any of the pickings. I’d put aside a handful for my housekeeper and drop off the rest to a group home, about three quarters of a mile up the road from my home.
It was a tonic for me, and a seasonal treat for them. Alexis and Ms. Remah seemed to enjoy the trip this year. I didn’t get lost in the activity as I usually did, partly because I was not alone, unable to go into the recesses of my mind. And mostly because I couldn’t keep from ogling the blatant curve in Alexis’ leggings, spreading at the start of her narrow back and expanding at her rear cheeks as she walked the orchards, picking apples. When they were done, I dropped them off at the house, both atwitter and chatty about their first time being at a private farm and picking their own produce. Just before I announced my departure for a meeting in the city, I caught the blaring lust, aligning my kitten’s eyes. When I made her aware of my need to leave, she was crushed, those eyes now long and doused in pain. I couldn’t allow Alexis to bait me with lofty expectations of a traditional romance. On my ride into New York, I felt confident about my abrupt departure. It turned out to be a needed lesson in balancing her anticipation.
During the second week of October, we celebrated my mother’s birthday at DiFillippo’s. Alexis had been fidgety all day. Cooperative, but cagey and distant, and throughout the entire event. That morning, she took an implausible amount of time preparing. Fully dressed and concerned as to why she wasn’t in our bedroom getting ready, I walked into the kitchen to find her hushing a private conversation between her and Ms. Remah the second she sensed my presence. Ms. Remah hissed with her tongue at Alexis, who abruptly left the room. That baffled me, but I thought quickly to drop it. The only woman I’d ever lived for any spell of time with was my mother, and I now had two. There was no way I could pretend to understand their bizarre behavior all the time.
When we arrived, she greeted my mother who, just as always, invited my wife into a fervent embrace. Alexis obliged, but gripped my mother tightly and for a span of time that expressed a fondness I wasn’t aware she had for her. My mother inhaled it, enthralled by rare reciprocity from Alexis, but I was left baffled once again. Ms. Remah attended the dinner with us, and I could tell she, too, perceived Alexis’ behavior as repellent and elusive. However, Ms. Remah remained glued to her side, staving off small talk and attempts others made at trying to engage her. That was a bit humorous considering her cantankerous persona. It also revealed Ms. Remah’s knowledge of what was going on with Alexis.
I asked her twice if she was okay, and at one point, I demanded the root cause of her foul mood. It irritated me to no end, mostly because I was clueless from where it derived and therefore couldn’t assuage it. Alexis maintained there was no problem, unconvincingly. Toward the end of the event, she slipped off alone and returned with red eyes. We left shortly after. By the time we arrived home, I was fed up. Once Ms. Remah was safe in her quarters and the alarm was set at the main house, I ordered Alexis to the sandbox. It was well after one in the morning; I didn’t care. I’d been charged up since deciding to address her peculiar withdrawal.
After twelve lashes and three orgasms, I was able to extract from my beloved that our mothers shared the same birthday. That struck me. Alexis had been mourning her mother while celebrating mine. Discovering that private battle lashed internally at me, monstrously. I was her husband…a licensed mental health therapist, who could effortlessly have helped her with grieving exercises had she at least shared her state of mourning with me.
I was just about to untie her from the St. Andrew’s cross, where her limbs held her trembling cacao frame face forward, and dismiss her, when she begged me through harsh sobs to take her. Something had shifted irrevocably inside of Alexis. It was both pleasant and dangerous for me. After long moments of deliberation as I studied the raised magenta stripes that marred her bountiful hips, every cell in my body screamed for caution regarding my next move. I acquiesced, incredibly lost in this new needy feature of her personality that I had yet to identify.
Other than the ludicrous movie-gorging events, Alexis had begun to settle into her role at RSfALC’s Christ Cares with full steam ahead. Within just two weeks, she secured three public funding sources for the following fiscal year that pledged grants, pending we commit to appropriating and depleting several of our current earmarked budgets. In the world of public service where grant funding is concerned, apparently you must use all endowments or lose future backing. Alexis had warned us of this the week she reviewed our programming portfolio. She illustrated to Precious and me, how as a religious organization with a not-for-profit social service wing, we had been endowed several grants in the past by the city and other state and federal fund sources that were never used as proposed. They were sitting in various accounts and a small amount had been diverted elsewhere. That small pocket of unaccounted-for money would take a lengthy process to reinstate a satisfactory relationship and be considered eligible for refunding.
In one short month, Alexis’ appointment to Christ Cares had proved to be beyond invaluable. She jump-started several initiatives to extend our services to the community and began the process of appropriately depleting abandoned former grant monies. She also improved on the current programs we had in place. Her staff admired her—some disproportionately for my liking, those were of the heterosexual male species, as they still didn’t know of our marital relations—and reasonably so. Precious would only be a matter to Alexis when she had to present to the board with Precious next to her. Alexis made it very clear she didn’t want to submit the Christ Cares program’s progress to Precious for her to relay them: she preferred doing it herself. There was no mistaking why, once she got over her nervous jitters during the first meeting Alexis attended and had begun flowing articulately and with such full-on knowledge, that by the time she left the room, I had the most painful erection underneath the table.
I, on the other hand, had begun an unforgiveable traveling tour. Within two weeks, the following three months of my life had been scheduled, filling up each day on the calendar. When Thaddeus presented me with the tentative schedule, I tossed it back to him demanding I be given at least two nights a week at home. I had a wife; one who was still acclimating to my household, and most critical of all, partial to self-pleasuring. I’d worked a great deal to have Alexis non-reliant on masturbation and could not regress in that breakthrough. My elevation to senior pastor had required
me to make rounds to our sister churches as well as C.O.O.L.J.C. organizational events. RSfALC was one of the largest churches in the organization, the political implications and obligations ran deep. Not only that, but I’d begun receiving requests to preach at churches outside of C.O.O.L.J.C. that I’d been able to delay until after my nuptials. I had to fulfill those appointments as well.
God’s timing is empirical. It was of great design to have Alexis aboard Christ Cares when she began. She planted her feet right away and became absorbed in building the department, often working late hours. Ms. Remah being at the house enhanced my peace of mind. My wife wasn’t alone or lonely as I traveled days at a time. We were eager to physically relieve each other upon every one of my returns. Our delicately balanced world was shifting. The transition tarried in my deepest prayers. It was one of the many huge risks I underwent, pulling Alexis into my elaborate, onerous, and industrious life. I understood the lifestyle I’d been called to at birth, and had anticipated it. Alexis had gotten so wrapped up—and so swiftly—into work, she barely recognized the potentially jeopardizing event taking place.
Thanksgiving arrived and Alexis stayed up virtually all night the eve of the holiday to prepare dinner with Ms. Remah. I was disgruntled, preferring her in my bed or making use of the hours in the sandbox, however I didn’t express this, understanding it would only reveal my greed of my kitten’s luscious body. It was enough that I’d been secretly on edge about having Rasul in my home for the holiday. To my credit, I fully grasped the concept of when you marry your spouse, you’re marrying their family—I’d had her non-blood relative living on my property as a result. However, my tolerance for Rasul had not ripened. He had still presented as the selfish, directionless leach he’d been to Alexis all of her adult years. I’d overheard her admonish him about not having found work after being released five months ago, therefore breaching their agreement regarding her apartment. I still kept my feelings regarding him to myself, believing that to be the best course of action.
