But what if Flora didn’t say anything to Alice? Only he and Flora knew what had happened and Flora wouldn’t want word to get around. It was more likely that she’d remain quiet. But could he live with that?
Alice and Jed were in the parlour finishing supper when Jack returned. They heard him fumbling with the door key and then letting himself in. Moments later he was standing by the door of the parlour. It was clear from his dishevelled state and his slurred speech that he’d been drinking.
“I think that, I think that I must go back – go back to London tomorrow. Got some things to do, you know. I’ll go to the ba– ba– bank first and make sure the money’s in. Then I’ll write to you, Jed, about the business. Well, better be going to bed now. Goodnight all.”
Jed had avoided looking at Jack but he turned now as Jack made to leave the room.
“So you’re still going to invest then, Jack. Nothin’s changed has it?”
“No, Jed, nothing’s changed.”
“You need a coffee, Jack, before you go to bed,” said Alice, getting up from her seat and moving to the range.
“Just water, if you don’t mind. Just a glass of water, please.”
Alice poured a large glass of water for Jack and he made his way out of the parlour.
“Jack don’t seem right tonight,” Alice said to Jed as soon as they were alone. “I wonder if something’s happened to him.”
“He’s alright. Just had a bit too much to drink, that’s all. And the investment’s alright, you heard him say so. That’s the most important thing, the business.”
Alice sat by the range thinking after Jed had retired to bed. Was Jack about to walk out of her life? Where would that leave her then? Again, events were moving so fast that she felt out of control. She couldn’t let Jack go before she had a chance to challenge him properly.
Jed, as usual, was out early the next morning, keen to make a good impression with the town council as he had been told to expect news about the redevelopment of the Maltings Barn soon. It was gone eight when Jack presented himself for breakfast in the parlour. Alice cooked him a full breakfast and took comfort in the activity which avoided the need for conversation. Then she washed dishes in silence whilst Jack ate his breakfast.
“That was very good,” said Jack placing his knife and fork together on a now empty plate.
“So what’s this all about?” said Alice, turning finally to face him. “A week ago you were telling me how much I meant to you and if you remember we made love in your bedroom. Had you forgotten?”
“How could I possibly have forgotten, Alice?”
“So when you came back here I thought it was to continue in some way. I know I was angry yesterday but you’ve got to see it’s not easy. I’ve got to sort out in my mind how I feel about Jed and where he fits into this. But now you’re going again and I don’t understand how you feel or what you want. You’ve bought your way into our lives with this business investment. I’m not complaining about that. It’s very generous and it could be the making of Jed. But just tell me, Jack, what’s going on between us, surely you owe me that?”
Jack shifted uncomfortably and stared hard at the table before looking up again at Alice.
“Alice, I can’t tell you how much you mean to me and how much I want to be with you. But what you said yesterday about ‘buying’ you made me think. You are married to Jed and I should have thought about that before we made love. I have a problem, Alice, I’m sometimes blinded to reason. I rush into things recklessly. It’s since the war. Things happened to me then which I think damaged my mind. Sometimes I hurt people when I don’t mean to and I don’t want to hurt you and Jed.”
Suddenly Alice was crying – tears streaming down her face. Jack got up from the table and held her tightly in his arms.
“I’m just so confused,” sobbed Alice. “I know why I married Jed and it was for the wrong reasons. But there was no other way. Then you come along and suddenly I see that there is another way, another way to feel about someone and another way to love someone. Now you’re going. Is that it? Do I go back to pretending with Jed for the rest of my life – just living a lie?”
Jack returned to London by train that afternoon. Alice walked with him to the station. They kissed goodbye on the platform and Alice watched the train steam slowly around the bend in the line and out of her life. As she walked back to Hope Cottage she felt heavy with sadness.
In the two weeks that followed, Alice tried to adjust herself to the pretence of married life. Jed required two things from her, food and support. Food was easy. A cooked breakfast, a packed lunch and then a full meat and veg dinner when he came home in the evening. Supporting Jed and listening to his many worries was a more daunting task. What to some people might be an opportunity was to Jed a worry or a problem. Alice would try hard to help him see the positive side of some business or social concern but Jed was not comfortable being happy. He got much more pleasure from seeing himself as a victim.
Even in the bedroom Alice had tried to overcome her inhibitions, hoping that once she restarted sexual relations with Jed, she would find the idea less daunting and slip into an easy routine. On the first occasion, Jed had passed into a deep sleep. On the second occasion, they had both drunk too much cider with their evening meal and agreed to postpone their love making.
Following Jack’s departure, he and Jed exchanged a number of letters regarding the business and, as Jed was barely literate, Alice did much of the letter writing and was consequently very involved in the way the business was developing. A cause for great excitement was that Carters had now been formally invited to tender for the refurbishment of the Maltings Barn. Two other companies were also being asked to tender but neither of these were based in Frampton and the town council were keen to have local craftsmen if possible. However, it had been made clear to Jed that he would have to submit a competitive tender and prove that he was capable of doing the work.
The refurbishment of the Maltings aroused great excitement and controversy in the town. It had been planned before the war to provide a large venue for townsfolk for meetings, concerts and even amateur dramatics. During the war it had been put on hold but was now being rolled out again as the flagship project of the ruling party on the council. Whoever won the contract to refurbish the Maltings would acquire additional prestige and status because it was a cherished municipal project.
Jack sent Jed advice on putting together a tender document and on creating a business plan which the town council had asked to see. Alice spent many hours with Jed in the evenings, laboriously creating the tender document by hand.
In the third week after Jack’s departure, Alice first noted some changes to her body. Her breasts seemed a little sore, especially around the nipples and she began feeling slightly sick around lunchtime. Initially, she put this down to an infection brought on by late nights, but as the symptoms persisted and she began to feel some tightness around her stomach, a chilling concern began to grow within her. She knew too well that these were the physical signs of pregnancy yet it was over eight weeks since she had last made love with Jed and even then she wasn’t sure they had got it right. The last time she had slept with anyone was with Jack on the day after Dan’s death. It was unplanned and spontaneous. She hadn’t thought about becoming pregnant because her few love making sessions with Jed had shown no evidence of her conceiving. She had half begun to believe that she might be infertile. The thought now that she might be pregnant from her one afternoon of passion with Jack was too awful to contemplate. Alice could hardly imagine the consequences. It would certainly mean the end of her marriage with Jed and amidst the ensuing recriminations, Jack would probably withdraw his investment and Jed’s business would fail. Alternatively, Jack might deny being the father and Alice might end up alone with the baby. Alice had no alternative but to make an appointment to see the doctor.
Dr. Murray ran his hands over her stomach and listened with his stethoscope. His elderly nurse stood guard to one side, ma
king the occasional note when Dr. Murray mumbled incoherently under his breath.
“Well, Mrs. Carter,” he said at last. “You and Mr. Carter are to be congratulated. You are expecting a baby and you are about five weeks pregnant. The baby will be due in early May next year.”
Alice said nothing. She lay on the couch with her dress pulled up above her exposed stomach. Her mind felt numb.
“You can get up now,” she heard him saying. “Nurse, can you help Mrs. Carter get her clothes on, please?”
Alice sat in the parlour of Hope Cottage trying to focus on what she should do but instead her mind kept racing out of control and playing different doomsday scenarios. Supposing both Jed and Jack rejected her? She’d be alone with an unborn baby and have to rely on charity. She’d be carted off to an asylum and probably never see the light of day again. Supposing she tried to get rid of the baby? She’d heard of people doing that but it involved big risks and you needed money. Could she claim the baby was really Jed’s? He would know that they hadn’t made love for over eight weeks but perhaps she could pretend and then at the end of her term claim that she was overdue. It was a risky strategy. Farming people knew the reproduction process well and Jed might soon smell a rat.
Should she tell Jack? If she did, how would he react? He could deny any knowledge, refuse to accept that they’d made love and leave her a laughing stock. Or maybe this would be the thing that brought them together. In an ideal world she saw herself with Jack, bringing up the baby far from Frampton – a new life.
But could she do that to Jed – take everything from him? He was longing for a baby but she had constantly put him off. Now to tell him that she was going to give birth but that he wasn’t the father could destroy him. There was one obvious course of action – she must tell Jack. He was the father and he had a right, in fact, a duty to know. If she wrote to him now she could still catch the afternoon post and the letter would reach him the following day.
My dearest Jack,
I have some alarming news for you. Dr. Murray has told me that I’m expecting a baby and that I’m five weeks pregnant. As I told you confidentially, Jed and I have not made love for over two months so it seems, Jack, that you are the father from that afternoon when we made love. I expect that you will be as surprised as I am.
Trouble is, Jack, I don’t know what to do. If I tell Jed he’ll be furious and he might even throw me out. He’ll also have it in for you and that could wreck the business partnership.
What shall I do, Jack? I need your advice. Please help me.
With much love, Alice
She walked to the post office that afternoon to make sure the letter caught the last post from Frampton. That evening and the following day passed in a daze. Jed asked her on a couple of occasions if she was feeling alright and Alice protested that everything was fine. Jed was so preoccupied with putting together his tender for the Maltings Barn that he let the matter drop without any further probing.
On the third day, the postman called after Jed had left for work. Alice sifted through the half dozen buff envelopes that contained mainly invoices from suppliers until she reached the small brown envelope extravagantly addressed in Jack’s handwriting. She ripped open the envelope and unfolded the letter.
My Darling Alice,
I hardly know how to begin. That our one afternoon of passion should lead to a new life seems hardly possible. Have no doubt, my darling, that I will stand by you. There will be many obstacles to overcome but I want to be with you and our baby forever.
We have known each other for only a short while but in that time I have fallen in love with you. You have seen some of my shortcomings and I have no doubt you will see more as you come to know me better. I am no angel but I do love you and will not let you down.
You will receive this letter tomorrow morning, Thursday, and I will be up in the afternoon. Tell Jed that it’s to do with the tender, I’ve some important information to show him. I’ll be up about two thirty and we can hopefully have some time alone together to discuss this matter.
With all my love, Jack
Alice clutched the letter to her breast and cried hot tears of relief. At least she wasn’t going to be abandoned. Jack would soon be with her and together they would work out something. It was now eleven thirty and she needed to let Jed know that Jack was arriving that afternoon. She had to make it sound convincing.
As Alice entered the Maltings Barn, she was drawn to the site of Jed’s work by the sound of heavy hammering. She looked up into the beams that soared high above the ground and saw Jed sitting astride the main centre beam hammering a new section into place.
“Jed, Jed,” she called out, “come down a moment, I got some news to tell you.”
“Can’t come down, Alice, I’d have to work my way along the beam to the ladder at the far end. Can’t you just shout the news up to me?”
It didn’t seem the sort of news to shout from floor to rafter but Alice was left with little choice.
“It’s Jack,” she bellowed. “He’ll be here this afternoon.”
“This afternoon? But he’s only just gone.”
“I know that, but he needs to see you about the tender. He’s got something important to tell you.”
“Well, I won’t be back till after six, you’ll have to entertain him till then.”
Alice was taken aback by his choice of words, but assumed they meant nothing.
“Alright, Jed, I expect he’ll have things to do. We can talk over supper tonight. Did you hear me, Jed?” But the hammering had already resumed.
As Jack drove the Austin along empty country lanes on his way to Frampton, he churned over in his mind the implications of Alice’s news. He realised how stupid he had been to make love to Alice without considering she might get pregnant. But there was no point in dwelling on that now. Although he’d never thought about it, the idea of having a baby had some appeal. He would leave this world having left a new life behind. The child might grow up to be a great success and make up in some way for his own troubled life. But on the down side he had less than three years to live. How could he be a real father to a child knowing that he’d never be there as that child grew up? There was also the question of Jed. Surely a man couldn’t be expected to stay with a wife who was bearing another man’s child?
Alice heard the sound of Jack’s car picking its way through the potholes as she sat nervously waiting. He was early. Alice watched from the front room window as Jack climbed from the car. She was always pleasantly surprised by his appearance. He was broad shouldered and his torso tapered to a trim waist. His body was long in relation to his legs and that gave him a powerful appearance. Although largely dark haired, wisps of grey were beginning to populate his temples, signalling that his youth was now well behind him.
Alice was by the door when he knocked and she opened it immediately. He stepped straight into the hall and clasped her tightly to his body, seeking her lips with his and kissing her hard and long on the mouth.
“Don’t worry, Alice, I’m here now. We’ll sort it all out.”
“I’m so glad you came quickly. You’ve no idea what this means to me. Let’s take your bag upstairs and then we can talk.”
She led him up the stairs into his bedroom. The flowers that she had placed in the room as an act of ‘guile’ were still there though their heads were drooping.
“I’m afraid I haven’t had a chance to change the bed since you were last here, you know, what with all that’s been happening.”
“Never you mind about that, Alice.” And with that he dropped his case to the floor and took hold of her again, drawing her body into his.”
“You know, there’s one advantage of this situation, you can’t get pregnant twice.”
They made love passionately and without inhibition. He was a skilled lover and Alice allowed him to take her on a sensuous voyage of carnal discovery which left her breathless and weak. This time he was gentle and considerate except when he reached the climax o
f his love making when again he seemed to be lost briefly in some other place. Afterwards they lay together on the bed naked and breathless. To be naked with Jack seemed natural. Now he ran his hand slowly over her body, kissing her gently and telling her how much he loved her. Lying together, they could look out across the adjacent countryside bathed in the soft light of another summer’s day. Alice felt curiously at peace.
“We need to talk, my darling,” said Jack softly, breaking an easy silence. “We’re made to be together and we’re going to have a baby. We could simply go, set up home somewhere else. I’ve got the money.”
“What would happen to Jed if we did that?”
“Well, it’s hard but he would have to deal with it. It’s happened before to other people.”
“I didn’t set out to hurt Jed. You do believe me, don’t you?”
“What you did was understandable. How did you know that this unpredictable stranger would come knocking on your door one hot bank holiday and fall madly in love with you?”
She pulled him towards her and kissed him hard on the lips then playfully bit at his earlobes. Suddenly she let out a gasp.
“Jack, what’s all this on your back?” she asked, leaning around him to get a better look. The last time they had made love in a semi darkened room and Alice had failed to see the purple scars and red weals that cut savagely into his skin. “My God! What’s happened to you?”
Jack sighed and reluctantly recounted his story. He told her about the spying behind enemy lines, about being discovered by the Germans and about being savagely beaten. He didn’t tell her about Yvette and Simone. He had resolved to try to lay this spectre to rest in his mind.
Alice was clutching a fist to her mouth as Jack recounted his story.
“How did you survive, Jack, why didn’t they kill you?”
“Oh, they would have done, but word got back to our HQ and they were terrified that we’d give too much away, so they mounted a rescue mission. Twenty specially trained soldiers came in to get the four of us out. In the end, two of my unit were killed in the rescue and five of the lads who’d come to get us out were killed too. But life was cheap, Alice. Thousands dying every day in the trenches, so what were a few more lives?”
The Guest Who Stayed Page 17
