by Emma Shortt
He eyed himself in the mirror, pushing the bad thoughts away, rubbed along his jaw, and frowned. A shave was so needed and soon. The stubble he’d sported for the last few days was not looking good. Jackson would probably be covered in marks for the next couple of days. He grinned slightly and rubbed the stubble again. Why did that make him feel good? That he’d marked her with his loving. Maybe because she had so many scars. Not in obvious places. But they were there all the same. On her back and her chest, one running down her thigh, another snaking is way around her left arm.
Stretching, Luke pushed open the shower door. He’d planned to save his shower for later, but he was sweaty and knew he smelled musky. The cold water would do him good. Almost ready him, in a way, for the conversation he knew was going to come. The moment Jackson told him whatever it was she’d been up to. Whatever had made her late.
And he was fairly fucking certain he knew what it was now. Her reaction had told him plenty. Jackson was going to tell him that she was helping to defend the community…and what could he say to that? He could hardly forbid her. Despite whatever thrummed between them, Jackson would not stand for being told what to do. She was far too independent for that, and though he sort of thought she’d listen to him and hear his concerns, she’d still do whatever felt right to her. But then where the hell did Sebastian fit into it all? The doctor was up to something. Luke was certain of it, but for the life of him he couldn’t work out how it involved Jackson. And a small part, just a little bit, really, wondered if he was going to have to tell Sebastian exactly what the lay of the land was. That Jackson was his and to stay the hell away.
Luke stepped into the shower stall and turned the water on, scowling as his thoughts ran and whirred and pushed inside him for prominence. A minute earlier and he would have missed it, but a minute could often make all kinds of a difference and just as the spray hit the shower floor he heard an odd sound from the bedroom. His scowl deepened because clearly Jackson was not asleep and he wanted her to be. She needed it. If she’d just do eight hours, he’d be a happy man. But what was that? What was she doing? It sounded like…he paused and carefully stepped back out of the stall, tilting his head back to look into the bedroom. Yes, just as he’d thought.
Jackson sat on the bed, legs crossed, feet tucked under her. Her pack was open on the bed, she wore nothing but her skin and had Mandy’s wooden hilt draped across her thighs, the blade against the mattress. She held an ellipse shaped stone in her right hand. Up and down it went, swish, swish, swish.
She must have crept out of bed to get the machete and he wanted to rally at her for that—but how could he? How could he possibly even think to? Her face was set into a look of pure concentration, her hands finding the rhythm so easily. Swish, swish, swish.
She was sharpening the blade. Readying her weapon for use, and he realized then that his thoughts had probably been on the mark. Bang on.
For a few minutes he stood there, half in the bathroom and half out, watching the play of her hands and the stone moving back and forth, back and forth. Conflicting feelings, conflicting thoughts all running through him. When he could stand it no longer he spoke.
“Jack?”
She looked up but her hands did not cease her motion. Swish, swish, swish. “Yeah?”
“You were going to tell me,” he said slowly. “Tell me what you were doing today. Why you were late back here. What you found to do.”
Jackson shifted, though the stone continued to move, and shot him a look he couldn’t quite decipher. “You don’t want to shower first?”
Luke’s gut did a kind of flip-flop and he swallowed. “No.”
“But you’re wasting the water.”
And water was not to be wasted. It was one of the main rules of the camp. In this heat, it was a precious commodity. “Here’s the deal then,” he said. “You tell me exactly what you were doing today. Then, because I’m probably not going to like it, I’ll go shower and think it over and then we can talk. Deal?”
“Why do you assume it’ll be something you won’t like?” she asked. Swish, swish, swish.
“Because of that.” He pointed to Mandy, and even he could hear the catch in his voice. “Because you’re sharpening her for something and it no doubt involves them.”
“I found a job,” she said, nodding slowly. “Something useful, Luke.”
“A job?”
Swish, swish, swish. “Yep,” she said. “Go and have your shower and then I’ll tell you. Because, it seems that fantasies really do come true, and Mandy and I are needed after all.”
…
Jackson frowned as the pounding of the low-powered shower spray almost, though not quite, covered the sound of Luke’s mutterings. He was angry with her. She thought he would be—the whole protectiveness thing rearing its head again—and because part of her understood the reason for it, she also wondered if she should have been a little bit more diplomatic. But diplomacy had never been her strong point and she sure as hell wasn’t used to explaining her actions to anyone. She just seemed to blurt things out these days and before Luke there’d been no one to care. Tye certainly hadn’t. But Luke is different.
She sighed. Yes, Luke was different, but then everything was different, and right now Sebastian’s offer was the only thing making sense to her. It was exactly what she had dreamed off. What getting south was all about, and even now, after all the things Sebastian had shown her, she could barely believe it was real.
“Luke will get it,” she told herself.
Luke always got her. Even though she knew she was a bit off he’d never once made her feel odd about it. She frowned and finished rubbing Mandy’s tip. The man showering just a few yards away played on her mind. She felt so damn guilty about making him worry about her. It was a mean thing to do, and though it was mainly Sebastian’s crappy fault, she couldn’t blame him completely. She’d wanted to find out everything about Two-h-ee and all the others that had come before it, and what it all meant.
Jackson bent down until she was eye level with her blade and squinted at the tip. She could see a knick on the top and wondered whose skull bone had caused it. There was no way to tell. She’d killed so many. Hundreds and hundreds… She made to smooth the dent out but pulled back just in time. Mandy was wicked sharp now and the blade would break her skin. Still, all in all, she was standing up to the demands Jackson had put her through. There were many more years left in the old gal yet.
The sound of running water ceased and Jackson placed Mandy on the small bed table next to her, the silvery blade glinting in the light. A harbinger of death to any zombie who dared cross her path. An odd image of herself, sitting, gray-haired, shaky hands, polishing the blade, filled her mind and she half smiled. It was a ridiculous idea. She’d probably be dead by then.
“Time to spill, sweetheart.”
Luke stood in the doorway, jeans hanging low on his hips. His chest was sprinkled with water and she couldn’t help but give a little sigh. His hair was mussed and he hadn’t shaved yet. She hoped he didn’t. The rough stubble so worked.
“Of course.”
He sat himself down on the edge of the bed and held his hand out to her. Jackson didn’t hesitate before scooting across, placing her hand within his. His skin was cool to the touch and she paused for just a moment to allow her gaze to drift up his chest, down his arms, and then back up again. Like most people left in the world, Luke was very toned. They had to be. It was all about being able to use a weapon or run like an athlete. If you couldn’t do either of those, you were as good as dead. She too was toned and looking down at herself now it occurred to Jackson that she would have had a runner’s body back in the old days. All sinewy muscles and perfect abs. She’d have had to work herself to death in the gym to even come close but she suspected that the abundance of food back then would have defeated her perfect body plans. It would not be a lie to say she’d once had a lot to love.
“What have they got you doing, Jack?” Luke asked, pulling her thoug
hts from her old shape.
“They haven’t got me doing anything.”
“Okay,” he said. “I phrased that wrong. Let’s start again. What are you doing? This job you mentioned—what is it?”
He was uncomfortable. She could tell and it made her uncomfortable. She wanted Luke to be happy. Happy with her decisions. Happy with her. It was such a weird feeling, so hard for her to get her head around. For so long, Jackson had counted on and thought of no one but herself, but now Luke was part of those thoughts and she had to consider him when she made a decision. They were together, and that meant something.
“First off, let me just say,” Jackson began, “that I did not complain when you told me you were going to work in the garage. I was happy for you.”
Luke squeezed her hand and frowned. “Now I’m worried, because you wouldn’t be qualifying your answer beforehand if it was something I was going to like.”
She almost laughed. Luke was so on to her. “Well, you thought that anyway. But no, I’m just trying to explain it to you. No, not explain. I don’t need to explain myself. I meant try and make you understand.”
“Shoot then.”
“Have you met Sebastian yet?”
He scowled. “Briefly.”
“You know he’s the doctor?” she asked, deciding to ignore the scowl.
“I do.”
“Well, after you left for work this morning I went out. I was planning to have a look around, scope out the place, like I said. Anywhos I didn’t get far. I ran into Sebastian straightaway. He grabbed me some breakfast and then he asked me for some help.”
The scowl remained. “What kind of help, Jack?”
“He’s not a normal doctor, Luke.”
“That he’s not. The guy’s got some weird vibe going on.”
Jackson tilted her head. Had Luke already heard what Sebastian was up to? She hadn’t even considered that, but he’d been out and about all day, so why the hell not. “What’s that supposed to mean?”
Luke shrugged and tickled his fingers along her palm. She shivered. “Nothing. Just that he’s a bit odd.”
And that he was. Jackson had met some weird people in her life, more so since the end of the world—in the early months at least. But there was no doubt that Sebastian took the crown.
“Well yeah,” she agreed. “He is, but then so am I. Hell we’re all a bit odd these days, apart from you, of course. You’re the most normal person I’ve met.”
“Hardly. So come on then, spill.”
How to start? She wished Luke had been there when she’d encountered Sebastian. That it had all been explained to them together. “He’s doing things,” she began. “Amazing things.”
“What sort of things?”
“With the zombies.”
Luke paused in his palm strokage and sucked in a deep breath. “And…”
She paused too before she spoke again. Wondering exactly what Luke was going to think. How best to frame it? Because it would be so much easier if Luke could actually see it, rather than hear it, and then maybe he’d get what Sebastian was doing and why she now had to do what she’d agreed to do.
“It’s complicated and I think you’re going to be shocked.”
“You constantly shock me, Jack.”
“Yes…” And then she frowned, because it suddenly occurred to her that there wasn’t any reason Luke shouldn’t see it. Sebastian was planning to head back out tomorrow morning, but there was absolutely nothing to stop her and Luke from going now. They weren’t prisoners in the camp. They were free to come and go when they chose, and she remembered the route perfectly. “You know,” she said after a moment. “It is better for you to see it. That’ll explain everything in a way I’m not going to be able to. Come on, get dressed, and grab your weapons.”
“Are you serious?”
Jackson tugged his hand, jumped from the bed, and grabbed her jeans. “Aren’t I always?”
“We don’t need weapons in camp, though. It’s safe here, Jack. I mean, yeah, okay admittedly, I’ve been carrying my gun, but there’s no need for the ax.”
She pulled her jeans on, shivering a little from the rough denim on her sore skin. Knowing too that Luke was not going to like her next words. Not one bit.
“Yeah, but we’re not gonna be in camp.”
He sighed and shot her a scowl. “Please tell me you didn’t.”
Jackson picked up her wrinkled vest and pulled it overhead, playing for time more than anything.
“Didn’t what?”
“Go back outside without me.”
She bent down to find her boots. One was on its side under the blond-wood table.
“Of course, I did,” she said without apology. “That’s where the zombies are. Now get dressed and I’ll show you exactly what Sebastian is up to. Believe me Luke, once you’ve seen this, nothing will be the same. Then you’ll understand.”
Chapter Thirty-two
Why the hell they called it a shack, Luke didn’t know. It was far from that. In fact, the building was a little bit too big for his tastes and he pulled their car up slowly. On the plus side, it wasn’t a built-up area, and he couldn’t see any zombies, so he had to take the points where he could. He eased off the gas, applied the hand brake, and grabbed his ax. His gun was digging into his back and the sweat wasn’t helping any. For a moment he imagined the cool air of the north, but then he remembered the zombies and he imagined it no more.
“Security check?” he asked and Jackson beamed at him.
“Exactly what I said when we came here. Sebastian doesn’t have a fucking clue about security. But I think he was right about one thing. I don’t reckon they’d be able to get in here. It’s all locked up pretty tight.”
“What’s it for?” he asked. “You’ve been extremely tight-lipped.”
She shook her head. “Nuh-uh, like I said, you gotta see.”
He sighed. “If it’s locked up tight, how are we going to get in?”
Jackson lifted her hips and pulled a small key from her jean pocket.
“Sebastian gave me this. Seems like I’ll need it in the future.”
Luke took a deep breath and shook his head. “Jesus, the more I think about it the more I have a feeling I don’t want to know.”
She smiled and planted a quick kiss on his check. His skin tingled all around the spot.
“Let’s do a perimeter check and then we can get started.”
They saw nothing out of the ordinary as they walked around the building, apart from the fact that it was all perfectly quiet—which in itself was a little unusual. No groans or grunts or howls or signs of anything not quite alive. Luke took everything in as he walked, almost enjoying the somnolent air of the area. The birds chirping in the trees, the smell of fresh grass, not to mention the company.
Despite his anger and his worry, and hell, his nerves, it was almost a relief to be back out with Jackson. Even though he couldn’t quite believe that she’d proved Pete right already. How long had she lasted, a few fucking hours? His mind grabbed at the thought and batted it back and forth but he pushed it away. It might not mean anything in the long term. Pete could well be wrong. And besides, it had not escaped his notice that Jackson clearly thought that she needed to be doing this, and it pleased him in a strange sort of way to see her happy—well, as happy as Jackson seemed to get. And then there was the fact that whatever she was doing with Sebastian didn’t sound like it had to do with protecting the community, so maybe he’d just have to suck it up and take the good with the bad. Yes, she’d be out of the camp getting her slay on, but at least it would be here in this quiet field…
“Feels like old times,” Jackson said, dragging his thoughts back to her.
“Old times being yesterday?”
She laughed and twirled Mandy in her hand. “Seems like ages ago. Maybe my mind’s making it sort of distant so I’m not traumatized.”
Luke shook his head slowly at her tone. “You? Traumatized?”
“Ye
p.”
“Jack,” he began. “There’s no doubt you’re that, but you’ll never admit it, so it doesn’t even count. Yesterday we barely survived and yet here you are out again in the thick of it.”
Despite his own internal reassurances he wanted to say more. He wanted to tell her what Pete had said but he didn’t even know how to start. She’d be angry. Worse, she’d brush off his concerns, and when it came right down to it he didn’t know which idea he hated more: that she might pull away from him or that she’d be indifferent.
She waved a hand around. “We’re fine here, and I’m going to ignore that comment. You’ll see why in a minute.”
“Right.”
She stood in the shadow of a large tree and he couldn’t help but sigh inwardly. She looked so damn pretty. Her hair was spiking up wildly around her face. Her beautiful face. And she looked more rested than he’d ever seen. Yeah, okay, her hand was clamped around Mandy and she had “the look” in her eye, but she was grinning at him. Plus there was the fact that at least now he didn’t have to spend his time worrying about what she was up to or what she might be plotting. Here out in the open was like their default mechanism. They’d spent so long on the road together it felt oddly normal and in that brief moment he had a little flash of what being in the camp might be like for Jackson.
Not normal at all. And she probably didn’t even realize.
“Come on,” she said.
They made their way back around the building and Jackson opened up the small front door, ushered him, and turned to lock it behind her. “To keep them out when we’re in here,” she said before pocketing the key. “Though they’ve never actually come here before, according to Sebastian. Maybe they know what this place is.”
Luke was not shocked by what he saw. The size maybe, but not the actuality. Of course, it made sense. Hadn’t he thought the doctor was some sort of kook? But as Jackson tugged him forward and began to point out various things on the shelves Luke realized exactly what was going on. Realized and felt his heart sink all the way down to his shoes. Kook didn’t even begin to cover it.
