by Rica Grayson
But I cared about what they thought still, my mom’s words fresh again in my mind.
I curled up on the couch. I made myself into this. I was successful.
I left them a long time ago.
But what I felt about them never left me.
There was a knock on my door. I didn’t answer it. I closed my eyes, drained. I didn’t have the energy or the inclination to.
And when I heard another knock, I felt something in me snap.
I jumped up. I walked to the door, opening it halfway.
There he stood, strong and reliable, and it was such a contrast to how I felt that it made me feel worse.
“Took a call, came back and you were gone. You okay?” The concern was there in his gaze, in the subtle shift of his body when he saw my face. As if he would kill to make sure I wasn’t hurt.
“I’m fine,” I said, but I knew my voice sounded hollow.
He stayed right where he was, and leveled me a gaze. “You don’t sound fine.”
I was not in the mood for this. My temper flared.
“I’ve already worn your stupid dress. I win. Yay me. You get to be my slave for one month.”
He didn’t take the bait.
Something flashed in his eyes briefly, and he murmured, “I was wrong about you that night, wasn't I?”
He’d meant the night of the festival. I didn’t answer. I didn't want to do this right now.
Wordlessly, he pushed me back gently. In shock, I didn’t get a chance to protest or stop him. Then he pushed the door open and came in.
Why was he here?
He looked around and he whistled. “Made a home for yourself here.”
He walked in casually and looked around.
He looked perfectly comfortable at my place, and it only served to annoy me.
“What do you want, Luke?” I wasn’t up to the usual back-and-forth. I just wanted to be left alone.
“You don’t have a TV,” he said, like I’d told him that there weren’t going to be any presents for Christmas.
“I think you should leave.”
He plopped down to the couch and made an approving noise. I used it to fuel my anger.
"Are you listening?" I shrieked.
"I hear you."
But he wasn’t listening. Argh.
“Luke—”
“I hear you, sweetheart, but I’m not leaving until you get that off your chest.”
I stopped. “What?”
“You have anger burning there.” He pointed to where my heart was. “It’s burning so fucking bright it’s blinding. Get it out. Talk to me. Yell at me. Don’t let it fester.”
“I—” I didn’t know where to start. “She called me,” I found myself saying.
“Who?” he asked mildly.
“My mom. She wants money.” The words started to pour out. I couldn’t keep the rising panic I felt inside me. I’d been taken back to that time again, the first time the hit landed on my cheek, when I stumbled and dropped down. I’d been confused at first, unable to comprehend what had just happened. Then I slowly got back up, and he did it again.
Why? Why did I still feel that first sting?
I felt my nails bite the inside of my palm. “She wants more. Again.”
Suddenly, I was in his arms. And the comfort made me feel such relief, I couldn’t find it in me to protest.
“Easy. Breathe, sweetheart,” he whispered against me. His hand stroked my back. It felt so soothing. I felt like I could just stay there for a while.
I’d pull away. Eventually.
I didn’t realize it was hard to breathe until I took another breath, and this time, it was easier.
“Thank you, I whispered.
I tried to get up half-heartedly, but his arms kept me in place.
Safe. Warm.
I sighed. His hands ran circles around my back. I think I just melted. Bam. Puddle.
My skin tingled, and I felt a shiver run through me.
“Cold?” His voice was gruff.
“No, just fine,” I murmured.
We stayed like that, until my breathing evened out, and my eyelids became heavy.
I was hugging a teddy bear. A large, squishy one.
I yawned, squeezing it tighter.
Wait a minute. This teddy bear was firm.
I opened my eyes quickly and saw where my hand was, which was perilously close to Luke’s ass.
I nearly fell off the bed.
His head was propped over a folded arm, and he looked sleepy but amused.
“Done fondling me, sweetheart?”
Oh my God.
Heat crept through my cheeks.
Like an idiot, I blabbered, “You—this—what—?”
“Wanna slow down so I can understand the question?” he said, a lazy grin on his face.
I made no sense this early in the morning, and more so because there was a large male body on my bed. I slept on a queen-sized one, but it may as well have been a single, with the way he occupied the space.
How on earth did he end up on my bed?
Then I remembered last night. I’d just ugly-cried in his arms, telling him about my messed-up parents. And I squeezed him as I woke.
I buried my head back in my pillow, groaning.
“I was trying to remove your arms so I could leave, but you wouldn’t let go. So I stayed.”
I scrambled back as far away as I could on my bed. I narrowed my gaze and huffed, “I’m sure you could’ve removed them if you tried.”
He ignored question, slowly getting up and stretching his neck. I found my eyes trailing those muscles. “Sleep well?” he asked.
“Uh-huh.”
There was a pause, then he got up. “Want to go out later?”
“Sure,” I mumbled.
Wait, what was the question?
I slapped a hand on my forehead. “No. What?”
“It’s a deal then,” came his non-answer.
“What did you say?” I nudged his shoulder.
“Thinking maybe dinner,” he mused.
Oh, hell no. “No,” I said simply.
He raised a brow. “You go back on your word?”
I hate him. I hate him. Grrrr.
“No,” I managed to say reluctantly.
He kissed my forehead, and the sweetness of the unexpected gesture surprised me. “Eight sound good?”
“No,” I said again.
His lips quirked up. “You keep saying that word.”
“Because you’re not listening to me!”
Argh. I was going crazy.
“Heard you fine the first time.”
He stood up. Then he winked at me. Winked!
I opened my mouth, but nothing came out.
“I’ll see you,” he said, walking out the door. “By the way,” he said, poking his head back in. “Nice hair.”
I zoned out, somehow feeling a bit light-headed today.
I made a smoothie and sat down on Eva’s couch.
She was talking to me about a new movie that was coming out. Something about the end of the world in a spaceship. Or maybe I imagined the spaceship.
I remembered making a sound of agreement and then dozing off. Then I was jerked awake again when the couch sank just next to me.
“What is wrong with you?” Eva asked with a frown, putting a hand over my forehead.
My heart was beating faster, and my stomach felt like it decided to have an afterparty with unlimited drinks. I’ve been feeling it the past few weeks, but somehow, today, it was stronger.
And then I was thinking of Luke’s biceps. Clearly, I was delusional.
“Caught some bug maybe,” I grumbled, annoyed with myself. “This time of the year too.”
“Stay here!” she said frantically.
“Not going anywhere,” I mumbled, eyes closed.
I heard the blender turn on, and nearly ten minutes later, she passed me a mango smoothie.
Best. Best best friend. Ever.
I pr
essed the glass against my cheek, trying to clear my head and hoping it would help calm me down.
I knocked on Luke’s door and waited. My heart continued to beat rapidly.
He opened the door, the ends of his hair wet, and a towel in one hand, but at least he had clothes on.
“Hi. I’m sorry, I can’t go out later,” I told him. “I’m sick.”
“You okay?” he asked, and the concern in it made me smile.
“Yeah. Think maybe I’m just tired. I’ll try to sleep it off.”
He told me to just get some rest, and that he’d wait until I felt better.
I realized I’d been looking forward to it when I felt disappointment.
And when I went back after doing the laundry, I found a pot of lavender sitting in front of my door. It couldn’t be any sweeter than if he gave me a hundred-dollar bouquet.
Heard this helps calm you down. Rest well.
- Luke
Chapter Ten
Maybe Friends
“What is that?”
It was nine in the morning a week later, and I just gave Wes his banner. I was jogging upstairs when I found Luke carting in a huge roll of what looked like a large, ridiculously thick carpet that he was trying to fit through his door. It was a little too tall for the doorway and slapped on the wall, making him back up a little. He lowered it a little to a slant.
He glanced back at me and grimaced. “It’s a gift from my aunt.”
“Need help?” I offered.
“It’s fine,” he called out as he got it all the way inside. “Didn’t realize how tall it was.”
I peeked inside to take a closer look. “She gave you a carpet?”
Would that thing even fit inside?
He came back out seconds later, both hands in his pockets, sighing. “She insisted that I take it. She’s a stubborn woman,” he said. Then his eyes met mine, and added, “Like someone I know.”
I rolled my eyes.
“How are you feeling?”
His concern warmed me. “Better, I think. Thanks.”
My phone started ringing in my pocket. I pulled it out, wondering if it was Wes calling again.
It was Kate.
“Hey,” I greeted cheerily.
“Sierra, Sherr’s… she—she got shot.”
I walked in the hospital in a daze fifteen minutes later.
I don’t even remember how I got there.
Luke came with me, something which I was grateful for.
I was just talking to her on the phone last night. It didn’t seem real.
I hugged Eva and Kate when I arrived, still in shock.
“Hale’s—” Eva hiccuped “—coming soon.”
I nodded, somehow unable to speak.
Chase’s shoulders were tense as he sat waiting. I put a hand on his back.
“You okay?” I managed to ask, my voice shaky.
“No.”
The single word was pained. My heart squeezed like a fist, watching him fall apart.
I sat down next to him, Eva and Kate on the other side. Luke sat down on the seat next me.
Then he put his hand over mine. I really needed it. I squeezed his hand back. He stroked the inside of my palm.
Ba-bam, ba-bam, ba-bam.
The pounding in my chest was back again.
More than his attempts to sweet-talk me, the simple comfort he offered me was cracking me wide open.
I felt something cold press on my arm a while later. The shock of the sudden contact made me gasp. I slapped the hand that did it, and glared at Luke.
He chuckled. “Drink?”
Ba-bam, ba-bam, ba-bam.
Chocolate milk. A weakness of mine. Well, all sweet things were a weakness of mine. How did he know just when to push and when to hold back?
My brows furrowed, and I announced, “You’re going to give me blood pressure.”
He looked perplexed. “It’s only chocolate milk.”
He dangled the drink in front of me, teasing.
I couldn’t help but crack a small smile and closed a hand over it. “Thanks.”
I looked around, and noticed how visibly tense Chase still was as he waited. No one dared approach him. His head was bent down, and he didn’t say a word.
Kate looked tired as she paced along the hallway. Her eyes met mine, and her lips trembled as she said, “She only just got back here. She can’t be leaving us again.”
My eyes were suddenly wet before I could help it.
“I know. I know.” I stood up and hugged her, hoping that everything would be okay.
After she calmed down, we waited some more.
Luke stayed with me the whole time. His presence was a comfort, steady and reassuring, like a balm to my soul I didn’t know I needed.
I slowly came to wake when I heard someone speaking in low tones somewhere nearby. Then I realized my head was resting somewhere, and that somewhere felt suspiciously like someone’s shoulder.
I opened my eyes immediately, because I had a feeling I knew who it was.
Luke was beside me, breathing slow and deep.
I always knew he looked attractive, but this close, he was drop-dead gorgeous. His lashes slowly flickered open.
Oh shit.
I sat up straight, trying to regain composure. He put an arm over my shoulder and pulled me back to him.
“You need to rest,” he said, voice gruff.
I was supposed to relax like this? “But—”
I suppressed a groan when his hand began to massage my shoulder, pushing at just the right spots.
“Relax.”
“Okay,” I replied, relenting.
And then I found it was harder to keep my eyes open.
“We just need a few more, and it should be set.”
After I’d woken up from my nap, Eva and I decided to get Sherry basket prepared with chocolate, cookies for when she woke up. I refused to think of the other possibility.
I glanced behind me and saw Luke tapping on something on his phone.
Eva cleared her throat.
I turned back to her and found her grinning at me.
“He stayed with you,” she nodded towards him, her eyes going soft. “Told you he cares.”
He wasn’t so bad. Maybe we could even be friends.
“Be right back,” I told her.
I approached him, a little cautious. I needed to ask him a favor, and I didn’t know if he’d mind.
He was playing a game on his phone—he was shifting some blocks. He looked up when I sat down beside him.
“Luke,” I began.
How should I say this? Reluctantly, I choked out, “I need help.”
He didn’t say anything about my grudging acknowledgement. He only raised a brow and leaned back on the seat. “What’s up?”
That was all he said.
Like he didn’t mind at all.
“I need to get Sherry something. But me and Eva are picking a couple of things for her. Might take a while.”
“What do you need?” he asked me.
Straight up. No giving me shit about it. No other questions or excuses.
I appreciated that. A lot.
More than I expected.
“Okay,” Luke’s voice said, sounding a little further away from the speaker.
He flipped the camera on so I got a view of the cards and he scanned it across the narrow display section. “There are a bunch of cards here, which one do you want?”
Birthday section, anniversary…
This was the second store we’d tried. He didn’t even sound the least bit annoyed when I hadn’t found the perfect one in the last store.
I went to a quiet corner in Goodies’ Donuts as I talked to Luke, with Eva chatting up the person at the counter.
“No, not that one. No, no, no,” I said after observing each one, realizing with a sinking feeling I might not find the perfect one.
A lot of them were okay.
But I didn’t just want okay.
&nbs
p; I nearly missed it the first time he scanned over.
Then I spotted it. It was all sparkly, but the main thing was the small animal in front.
“There!” I said excitedly.
The camera movement stopped. “Which one?”
“Panda!”
The camera went back and forth until it settled on just the one.
He chuckled. “This one?”
When he opened it, music started playing, and a piece of cardboard popped up, spinning.
A laugh escaped me, and I put a hand over my mouth. “Oh my God. It’s perfect!”
“Crazy,” I thought I heard him mumble.
I heard Eva call my name. I caught up to her. She was carrying a small pack of donuts as she her words tumbled out in a rush, “Wes called. Sherry’s awake.”
I drove as fast as I could without breaking any traffic laws.
Barely.
“I love you,” Sherry declared when we walked in. Eva was holding up the Goody basket.
Eva’s laugh tinkled across the room.
“Did you get it?” I asked Luke.
And when he handed me the card, something passed between us the moment our fingers brushed. Like a little zap. I felt it all the way to my toes. I pulled my hand back quickly.
Sherry looked at us curiously.
Thinking back to the past few weeks and how it went from him stealing my pizza to falling asleep with him on the couch, I shrugged.
He’s weird, I mouthed to her.
She watched, thrilled when the Panda cardboard figure popped up and started dancing, accompanied by some music.
When Chase arrived, the room quieted to a hush.
I met Eva’s and Wes’ eyes. I bit the inside of my cheek while the two were both grinning. I turned back to Luke and took his hand, pulling it with me as we all left to give them some privacy.
After we left the room, Luke glanced down at his watch.
It struck me that I was probably keeping him from leaving. Maybe he felt he had to be here out of a sense of responsibility.
“Sorry.” Of course he had things to do. I didn’t even consider them. “Did you need to go somewhere? It’s okay if you have to go. Don’t feel obliged to stay.”
His brows knit. “I don’t. Sweetheart, you had a rough day—don’t worry about me. But wait here, I’ll be right back.”
