When Shep touched her elbow, she felt a shaft of heat rush through her. “I might have to spend most of the night in the barn. In the morning, we can talk.”
Raina nodded, her throat suddenly tight. All she wanted to do was blurt out the words and see Shep’s reaction. Yet, on the other hand, she wanted to keep the secret to herself, just in case telling Shep would change her life in a way she didn’t want. She wasn’t sure what to expect from him. Just how well did she know him?
Ryder’s point exactly.
“We can talk when the crisis is over.”
“Sometimes there seems to be one after another.”
Releasing her arm, he ran his hand over Manuel’s hair. She wondered what kind of dad Shep would be with a daughter. Protective, that was for sure. Probably doting, too. But he already had three children. Would he want another? And if he did, then what? How would she handle having him in her child’s life? In her life? Attraction was one thing. Parenting was another.
“The boys had showers before supper. You can skip Manuel’s bath tonight, if you’d like.”
“I don’t mind. We’ll make a playtime of it.”
“I’ve been putting cotton in his ears in case he splashes. I have those little earplugs, too. They’re on top of the chest in his room.”
“I won’t forget,” she said, amused that he’d think she would.
“No, I guess not,” he responded with some chagrin. “I’m just trying to think of anything that could crop up.”
She raised her eyebrows. “I’m thirty-seven, Shep, and my coping skills are pretty good. Even if your boys throw me a curve, I’ll try not to strike out.”
He laughed at her sports imagery. “Okay, I get the picture.” His gaze lingered on hers for a few more seconds, and that made her tummy shimmy—and not from evening sickness.
“I can show you to the guest bedroom upstairs—”
“We’ll show her,” Roy piped up. “It’s next to ours,” he explained to Raina.
Shep gave Roy a pat on the back. “Thanks. I know you and Joey will make Dr. Gibson feel right at home.”
Showing Raina just how prepared he was, Shep pulled a card from his pocket. “That has my cell phone number on it. I’ll have it with me. If you need anything, just call.”
Again she nodded.
After a last, long look at her and Manuel, he said, “I’ll see you in the morning, boys,” turned and jogged down the steps, not stopping his fast pace until he reached the barn. There he tossed another look over his shoulder at her and disappeared inside.
During the rest of the evening, Raina played mom. She had to admit, giving Manuel a bath while Joey and Roy brushed their teeth and put on their pj’s felt natural. After settling Manuel in his crib, she sat on the boys’ twin bed, Joey and Roy on either side of her, and read them their favorite story. The words rolled off her tongue as if she’d read it before, but she hadn’t. They laughed and asked her to read their favorite pages over.
As Joey leaned forward to point to a picture, a medal on a chain swung from around his neck. Raina asked, “That’s St. Christopher, isn’t it?”
Joey’s fingers closed around the medal. “Yeah, it is. My dad who died gave it to me. He said it would always keep me safe.”
“I have one, too,” Roy remarked, as if he didn’t want to be left out. “Mine’s in a box in my drawer. I was afraid I’d lose it. So my dad…” He hesitated. “My dad in the barn said that’s best for now.”
“I think your medals are wonderful remembrances,” she said softly.
Obviously wanting to change the subject, Joey asked, “Can we get a drink of water?”
The brothers tried to stall their bedtimes, but finally they settled in, tired from a weekend full of activities with Shep. Joey had seemed quieter than Roy, but then he always was. She wondered about the stomachaches, if he was still having them, but didn’t bring them up.
Before she’d given Manuel his bath, she’d deposited her backpack in the guest bedroom and hung her outfit for office hours the next day in the empty guest-room closet. Apparently Shep didn’t have overnight visitors often.
After taking her own shower, slipping into feminine pink plaid boxers and a T-shirt, she lay on top of the covers with a magazine she’d brought along, thinking she’d read for a little while, just in case the boys didn’t go right to sleep. However, she must have been as tired as they were, because she drifted off.
The next thing she knew, she felt a hand on her shoulder—a large, warm hand. Thinking she was dreaming, she leaned her cheek against the fingers, remembering Shep’s sensual touches by the stream.
“Raina?”
His voice was husky, deep, louder than a dream.
Instantly, she came awake and found Shep leaning over her.
Chapter Six
The light from the hall cut a swath into the guest bedroom, putting Shep in silhouette as he gazed down at Raina.
The same look had been in his eyes before they’d made love. No, not made love. They didn’t know each other well enough for that. Still, she couldn’t have had sex with him if she hadn’t felt a deep connection. Did he feel that connection, too? Or had it only been pleasure he’d been after—a relief from his life with his boys.
He dragged a wooden chair from alongside the bed and sat facing her. “It’s around midnight. I wanted to make sure everything was okay up here.”
“How’s the horse?”
“Buttermilk is coming along. Ed came back to help out. He’s walking him while I make us some coffee.”
Shep was looking at her pink T-shirt, appraising her plaid boxer shorts. She’d left the window open and hadn’t bothered to cover with the sheet. Now she felt a little uncomfortable, especially without a bra. “The boys are fine. I read them a story while Manuel fell asleep.”
“How many glasses of water did they ask for?”
“Three, but they only got two.”
He chuckled. “If I don’t set a boundary, they’ll test me until I draw one.”
“Manuel’s the sweetest baby, and since I was here last, he’s picked up more words and syllables. The surgery worked—I don’t think he’ll be far behind at all.”
Okay, they’d covered the subject of the boys, and now they both knew what was coming. The pulse in her ears was pounding hard.
She hiked herself up to a sitting position and laid the magazine to the side of the bed.
“How did you really cope with September eleventh?” Shep asked, real concern in his voice.
She shrugged. “I spent most of the day with my friend Lily. She lost her husband recently and she’s pregnant. We definitely understand each other right now.”
“Lily Wescott? I knew her husband. Troy was a great guy.”
Raina thought about how life was one big circle…just like life in Sagebrush. “I called Clark’s family. Angie and Gina came over, too, late that evening. We went through photo albums. I do that every year and allow myself to relive the pain and cry. I found if I don’t, if I try to ignore the day, if I think everything’s going to be okay, then it isn’t. Grief has a way of bleeding upward from your heart through your whole body, so it’s better just to take it on.”
“You’re a brave woman, Raina.”
She shifted on the sheet, uncomfortable with his assessment. “No, I’m not brave. I’ve just learned what works for me. Lily will have to find her own way. In the meantime, we can support each other. That’s what friends are for. She’s thinking of moving into the Victorian, and that would be terrific. We’ll all help her raise her baby.” Raina suddenly felt the color drain from her face.
Apparently Shep noticed. “What is it?” He took her hand, and the gesture made her confession so much harder.
She slipped her hand from his, needing her wits about her. “I’m pregnant, Shep. Two pregnancy tests were positive.”
He looked stunned for a moment, took off his Stetson, twirled it in his hands, then set it back on the top of his head. “I know this pregna
ncy is my responsibility as much as yours, but I need a little time to take this in.”
That really wasn’t the reaction she’d expected, but Shep often did the unexpected. “Okay. I’ll go back to sleep up here, and you can think about it while you’re walking Buttermilk.”
He took her hand again and this time held on. “I don’t want you to feel alone in this, but right now I can’t stay. I have to get back to the barn.”
“I understand.” And she did. But they couldn’t resolve anything if they didn’t talk. Obviously, Shep wasn’t a big talker until he knew what he wanted to say.
Pushing back the chair, he stood, leaned down and kissed her forehead. It was a tender, light kiss, almost like a whisper. She might have imagined it.
After he put the chair back where it belonged, he went to the doorway. “Light off or on?” he asked.
“Off is fine. I need to go to sleep so I have energy for the boys in the morning.”
“Remember, call me if you need me.”
She had her phone on the bedside table and his number beside it. But she wasn’t going to call him—because she didn’t think he wanted her to need him.
Raina took the tray of cinnamon toast from the oven and carried it over to the table, where the boys were already starting on their scrambled eggs.
“What’s that?” Joey asked.
“Cinnamon toast. My mom used to make it for me and my brother when we were your age. It’s hot. I’ll put a piece on your plates. You have to let it cool a little.”
They had kept her stepping this morning—getting Manuel up, dressing him and readying the other two boys for breakfast, too. It was a challenge she’d enjoyed. The same thing with cooking breakfast. She hardly ever did that for herself, just grabbed a container of yogurt and a piece of fruit and ran.
She knew Shep was occupied with the veterinarian. As she cut pieces of cinnamon toast for Manuel, she wondered how the horse was faring. She wondered even more what Shep was thinking about her pregnancy.
A sudden knock at the door interrupted the boys’ chatter. “Wait a couple more minutes before you try that toast,” she warned them, and went to answer it. As soon as she opened it, the woman on the other side stepped back, surprised.
“Hello! I’m Carla Sumpter, Shep’s caseworker. And you’re…”
“I’m Raina Gibson.” She could see in the caseworker’s eyes that she instantly made a connection with information in Shep’s file.
She wasn’t sure whether to let the woman in or not. Maybe she should call Shep. But she didn’t have to. Over Mrs. Sumpter’s shoulder, she spotted him jogging toward the porch.
“Mrs. Sumpter! This is a surprise this early on a Monday morning. How can I help you?”
“I just thought I’d stop by for that follow-up visit and see how everyone is.”
“Excuse me,” Raina said. “I don’t want to leave Manuel for too long.”
The caseworker wouldn’t need to talk to her, so she hurried back to the kitchen, where she put bite-size pieces of toast on Manuel’s tray. He already had some scrambled eggs in his hair, and she tried to brush them away.
Roy looked up at Raina. “Her again?”
Raina tried to suppress a smile. “You don’t like when she visits?”
Roy shook his head vigorously. “She puts ants in my pants.”
Joey explained, “That means she makes us all nervous, especially Dad.”
Raina had never seen Shep nervous, but then the boys probably sensed more than they saw.
As if on cue, the caseworker and Shep came into the kitchen. “What are we having this morning?” Mrs. Sumpter addressed the boys.
“Something new,” Roy told her. “Cinnamon toast.”
“I see. Does Dr. Gibson cook for you often?”
Raina’s mouth opened but she wasn’t exactly sure what to say. She didn’t have to worry because Roy filled in for her. “This is the first time. She stayed last night.”
Shep’s gaze met Raina’s. “I explained about the horse being sick and you sleeping in the guest room.”
“She gave Manuel a bath,” Joey said helpfully.
“Wasn’t that nice,” Mrs. Sumpter said, even though Raina wasn’t sure she meant it.
“Take another bite of toast, then get your things together,” Shep ordered Joey and Roy. “You don’t want to be late for the bus.”
The brothers hurriedly took two more bites of toast, drank some milk and ran to the playroom to get their backpacks. The silence in the kitchen was awkward until they returned.
“I’ll take them down the lane to the bus stop,” Shep told the women. “If it’s on time, I should be back here in about ten minutes. Will you be all right?” he asked Raina, in spite of Mrs. Sumpter being there.
She squared her shoulders and encouraged Manuel to eat another bite of toast. “I’ll be fine.”
Shep nodded to both women and led the boys to the door. After they called noisy goodbyes, they followed their dad to the bus stop.
In spite of the caseworker’s attention focused on her, Raina pulled up a chair beside Manuel and offered him a sippy cup with milk.
“So. Mr. McGraw says you’re Manuel’s doctor,” the caseworker said, prompting her.
“Yes. I’ve also treated Joey.”
“And the two of you struck up a friendship?”
“You could say that.”
“Now you’re here, so I assume the two of you have some connection.”
Oh, they had a connection all right, but she wasn’t about to tell this woman about it.
“Are you planning to stay here while Eva is away?”
This woman was fishing. True, it was her job, but Raina still didn’t like it. “No, I’m not. Shep called me and asked if I knew of a nurse who could stay overnight, and on such short notice, I volunteered myself. I’ve become fond of the boys.”
“And Shep?”
“We respect and admire each other.”
“How quaint.”
Now Raina’s hackles were up. “Excuse me?”
“Well, admire and respect are old-fashioned terms in a world that doesn’t understand them very well.”
Holding her temper, Raina returned, “That doesn’t mean they can’t exist.”
“How old are you, Dr. Gibson?”
Taking a breath, warning herself to be tactful, she answered, “Thirty-seven.”
“I assume you’re single?”
“Yes. I’m widowed.”
“You’re young to be a widow. I assume your husband was the same age?”
“He was a few years older.”
Apparently Mrs. Sumpter wasn’t going to stop poking until she got the information she wanted. So Raina might as well put her life on the table. “Clark was a fireman. He died on September eleventh. I really don’t want to discuss that with Manuel in the room.”
“But he doesn’t understand—” Mrs. Sumpter began.
Enduring enough, Raina interrupted her. “My former housemate is a baby-development expert. She believes children pick up mood and tone, as well as a sense that surrounds words when they’re spoken. I remember that when kids are around. Maybe in your profession, it would be good if you did, too.”
“I’ve been managing my job for fifteen years just fine.”
“I’m glad about that. That should make Shep feel so much easier about adopting Manuel. I hope there won’t be any surprises.”
“That depends. If Shep is involved with you, the adoption could be delayed.”
Footsteps on the porch were definitely Shep’s this time. After entering the kitchen, he picked Manuel up out of his high chair. “How was breakfast, buddy?”
Manuel nodded and touched Shep’s face with sugar-sticky fingers.
“Oh, so I’m going to wear cinnamon as aftershave this morning,” he teased. He found a Busy Box for Manuel to play with on the table as the child sat on his lap.
Shep asked Mrs. Sumpter, “Why did you really come by this morning?”
“
I’d like to finish up my questions first.”
He glanced at Raina. “Does Raina need to stay?”
“Dr. Gibson is part of these questions. I want to know what the two of you are to each other.”
Raina’s heart felt like a high-speed train on a newly polished track.
Shep hadn’t taken off his hat, and the shadow hid part of his face. “What if I told you we’re trying to figure that out.”
“I won’t ask the obvious question, since you said you were in the barn all night and she was in the guest bedroom. But if you get married, that could add months onto the course of the adoption until we make a portfolio on Dr. Gibson. The relationship has to be examined to make sure it’s healthy for Manuel.”
Shep unbuttoned the top button of his shirt and looked angry. “You don’t think Raina would be good for the boys?”
“I didn’t say that.”
“That’s what you indicated. Don’t you think they might need a woman’s influence, kindness and warmth?”
“Every child deserves that, Mr. McGraw. But I have to see with my own eyes to know it’s true. You have bonds with these boys. I know that. If Dr. Gibson is going to be in their lives, I have to see how they relate to her, too.” She looked from Shep to Raina, and although they were sitting at least a foot apart, Raina wondered if the caseworker could feel the sexual tension between them. She herself certainly could. Whenever Shep was in the same room, everything seemed to buzz.
Mrs. Sumpter cast a final glance at Manuel. “All right. I think that’s all I can do here today. You don’t need to see me out. I can find the door. It was nice to meet you, Dr. Gibson. Maybe we’ll see each other again sometime soon.”
After the caseworker was gone, Raina heaved a sigh of relief. “That sounded like a threat.”
“No, she just keeps her word. I’m sorry you had to go through that.”
“Is she like that every time she comes?”
“She has a reason for each of her visits. This—” He pointed to her and then himself. “This just cropped up today, so she pounced on it. You handled her well.”
The Texan’s Happily-Ever-After Page 8
