by Cydney Rax
Why are you pissed at Rashad? Yes, he cheated on you, but didn’t you inadvertently help him? You know the man loves sweets; and you handed him a plate of his favorite cake with icing on top. Did you actually think he wouldn’t want a piece? Why are you so stunned he slept with Nicole Greene? Rashad’s a good-looking man. And since you slept with Eddison for revenge, you’re no better. You don’t even deserve Eddison. And once he realizes who you really are, he’ll let you fall down and lie in the gutter, too.
Kiara trembled violently and returned the book on her lap. Her heart sunk, and suddenly being pampered didn’t feel so good. She caught the ongoing envious stares from the women sitting near her. She knew they only saw the shell of her: the woman whom others admired because it looked like she had her life together. If only they knew the truth.
Myles, her unborn baby, and her new man were the things that made her happy. And even if the way that she ended up with Eddison was completely immoral, no one on earth wanted to admit bad things about themselves, even if they were true.
“Are you all right, sweetie? You don’t look so well.”
“I’m great!” she told Eddison. “I’ll be even better in time.”
Kiara offered Eddison an encouraging smile and tried to relax.
“Maybe a little drink will help me feel better.” She allowed herself a teensy sip of wine.
“Try not to take more than that one sip. In fact, I will ask them for bottled water. Put that glass down.”
She instantly obeyed him. “You really do care,” she whispered.
“Your life impacts more than just you.”
Eddison requested a cold bottle of water for Kiara. His take-charge attitude made it seem like he was enhancing her life even in tiny but important ways.
Right then she refused to allow negative thoughts to condemn her. She was eager to face her future, a better future, and not be mentally punished by her conscience.
Eddison was a rare man. Kiara believed it with all of her heart. But the heart can be fragile once it’s been hurt.
Kiara guzzled a swig of water and asked, “Eddy, do you believe that people can have just one soul mate?”
“Hey, I loved my wife until the day she died. But she’s never coming back. I know that Nina wouldn’t want me to mourn her forever. And everyone deserves to have love throughout their life, not just one time. So yeah, my next soul mate . . .” he whispered. “Could be you.”
“Me! That sounds wonderful but crazy.” Kiara laughed nervously. “I-I’m still . . .” She cautiously eyed the women around her who seemed to envy her.
“You won’t be in that dilemma forever.
“True, but I feel like a flop. Like, if it didn’t work the first time, why would God give me another chance?”
“Because no one is perfect, Kiara. And if the Lord is good, He can give anyone who needs it a second chance. There are far too many people on this earth who didn’t hit a home run their first time at bat, but they stepped up to the plate again. They forgot about their failure. They took another chance, swung the bat, and knocked the ball out the park.”
“You make everything sound so easy, and doable, and possible.”
“That’s because anything is possible, if you’d only believe.”
Chapter 3
You’re My Lady Now
After Eddison and Kiara returned from the nail salon and settled inside his house, they ate a simple dinner that he prepared: baked salmon, canned corn, and a green salad. Then they cuddled and fell asleep in his bed while watching TV. But much later, when it grew pitch black outside, and when Eddison could hear the birds singing in the trees of his backyard, he glanced at the neon clock on the table next to him. He gently tapped Kiara on the shoulder.
She stirred in her sleep. “Huh? What?”
“Get up. Get dressed.”
“What time is it?”
“It’s almost six.”
“A.M.?”
“Yes. Get up. Get dressed.”
“But it’s Saturday.”
“I know that. Now come on.” She groaned, but got out of bed and dressed herself alongside Eddison.
After they got in his Chrysler 3000 and looped around the circular driveway and zoomed down his street, Kiara noticed how dark it was. “Eddison, where the hell are we going at this time of the morning?”
“You’ll see.”
With a smile on his face, he drove until he entered I-10 going west; surprisingly, the highway was littered with cars speeding toward their destinations.
“Oh, I know what you’re doing.” Kiara yawned. “You must want to catch the day after Christmas sales.”
He chuckled. “It’s still November, woman, nowhere near Christmas You really are sleepy. I need you to wake up soon. There’s something you need to see.”
After a while Eddison reached the suburb of Katy, Texas. He kept going until he came alongside a large, empty field lit by several streetlights. It was a charming three-acre parcel, and the ideal location to build a country estate.
Eddison emerged from the car and ran around to open Kiara’s door. They walked a few yards across the vast meadow. The firm grass smelled fresh and sweet and it loudly crunched underneath their shoes.
“Can you see this?” he asked as they came to a stop.
“Yeah. What about it?”
“What do you see?”
“Um, not much. Just a bunch of grass.”
“Exactly, Kiara. And right now your life can be compared to this vast, empty field. That means the possibilities of what can be are endless. Because there’s nothing but grass . . . with no tall buildings to block your vision. That’s what I meant by anything you want is doable . . . if you can dream it, you can see it. And if you can see it in your mind, you can build whatever you want to build . . . when the fields are empty.”
“I’m confused.” Her voice trembled. “What about the baby that’s coming?”
“Right now, your life is an empty field.” Eddison grabbed her hand. “Whatever good you can imagine happening in spite of everything that’s going wrong, it can still be yours. Don’t let fear keep you stuck in the past. I had to learn that lesson myself. Just keep believing, my lady.”
“All right, Eddy. I will try my best.”
“Say, ‘I believe.’ ”
“Do I really have to?”
“Yes, you do.”
“It seems silly.”
“Of course it does, but do it anyway.”
“I believe.”
“Say it like you mean it,” he commanded.
“I believe, dammit,” she shouted.
“Good job.”
Eddison grabbed Kiara’s shoulders and carefully led her a few steps away. They walked toward the east.
“Look up.” He pointed.
The earth felt quiet and still. Kiara watched the brilliant sun as it mysteriously rose. The sky resembled the work of a master painter. The colors of the horizon were orange, pink, and yellow, all swirled together. Kiara had never seen anything like it.
“Amazing how something so simple can be so inspiring,” she gushed in awe. “It’s breathtaking.”
“Yes, it is,” he replied. But he was staring at Kiara when he said it. “How’d you like to wake up and see that every morning?”
“It would be like a dream . . . like heaven.”
They held hands and watched the sky transform from twilight to morning. She enjoyed the country landscape. And for the first time in a long time, Kiara gained the courage to face the future. One failed relationship wouldn’t block her desire for happiness. She’d make sure of that.
When they drove away from the field, Kiara settled in her seat and closed her eyes so she could snooze and fantasize about babies and love and family. And Eddison wrote down the phone number depicted on the large “For Sale” sign that stood in front of the grounds near the sidewalk. It was a property he’d viewed before, and he was happy to know it was still available.
By the time they got bac
k to his house, and he started making her a breakfast of eggs, toast, and turkey sausage, Kiara started singing.
“This is no ordinary love,” she sang.
“No, it’s not,” Eddison replied as he took time to smack her on her butt.
“You are very romantic, Eddy. Now I understand why the women at work throw themselves at you and the women in the grocery stores try to force themselves on you.”
“I wish I hadn’t ever told you that.”
“I’m glad you told me. What woman wants a man that nobody else wants?”
He could only laugh and blush, which made Kiara feel horny with desire.
Following breakfast, they showered together. Afterward, they dried each other off with large towels and crawled into his bed. They stretched out facing each other, and when Eddy began kissing Kiara, she eagerly responded. She thought he was so sexy, and kind, and manly. Plus his lips were luscious and hot. She liked the feel of his hands on her breasts. He aroused her even in her pregnant state.
Whoever said sex ended when pregnancy began didn’t know Kiara and Eddison.
He got behind her in a spooning position, then quietly entered her. She wanted him to.
“I feel like I’m hurting you.”
“Eddison, you can never hurt me.” Kiara’s tone was serious. She relaxed and had to admit that she loved having sex with Eddy. She thought it was fun to make love and have full conversations with him. “But I know one thing,” she said as he was stroking her from behind with his chest against her back. “When this breaking-up mess is over with, and when I can fully give my heart away again, I vow to never be hurt through a man’s actions. I’m going to protect my heart like it’s Fort Knox.”
“That’s noble, Kiara, but not entirely preventable. Things happen. Life and love may hurt sometimes.”
“Yeah, well, I definitely want to love again, but I’ll be very careful next time. Oh, God, mmm, that hurts yet it feels so damned good.” Her eyes rolled in the back of her head as Eddison made love to her. “Jesus Christ Almighty. I-I’ve got too much other stuff to deal with.”
“You’re so cute when you’re determined.”
“I gotta be determined.” Kiara enjoyed the feeling of Eddison rocking her from behind, cupping her breasts. “You want to hear my weekday schedule? Alarm goes off at five. Take shower. Wash face. Brush teeth. Put on makeup, comb hair. Get Myles up. Make him wash his face and brush his teeth. Make him go find his backpack and his Chuck Taylors, which I know are lost somewhere in that big old junky closet he got. Get him out the door in time so that he can eat breakfast at the fancy school he goes to. Ooh, that feels good. Keep going. Then I, I, I answer his thousand questions during the ten-minute ride. ‘Mommy, why this’ and ‘Mommy why that?’ Drives me crazy. And then, ouch, ugh, mmm. And then I drive my son’s hyperactive ass to the drop-off circle. Then I say bye to him, and floor it so I can beat everyone to work before they get there because I’m the HNIC. I’m making big paper and I gotta be the ex—uh, oooh, mmm yeah—I gotta be the example. Ouch, that feels so good. Keep going, baby. Then I. Then I log onto my computer.” She gritted her teeth. “I-I review my calendar. Move money around so the budget stays right. Deal with these messy-acting employees all day long. Ignore the daggers I get from that skank bitch Nicole. I go to meetings. Oooh, baby.” She shuddered and felt like she wanted to faint even though she was already lying down. “I-I-I go to one meeting after another meeting and I—”
Eddison thrust into her one good time and she screamed at the top of her lungs.
“Kiara! Why you getting all wired up while I’m trying to give you a tune-up?”
She moaned and shuddered, then burst out laughing. Eddison happily kissed her neck and squeezed her nipples. His touch felt magnetic and gave Kiara tingly goose bumps. She loved how good he was at making her forget the bad stuff.
Kiara quickly ducked underneath the covers and made sure to do everything she could to make her man feel as good as he always tried to make her feel. But while she was trying to love him, her thoughts centered on someone else.
What’s he doing? Who is he with? What would he do if he knew I was fucking Eddison and loving it? Who gives a damn?
She mentally regrouped then climbed on top and rode Eddy’s dick for a while, till it felt good and hard. Painful yet pleasurable. And it amazed Kiara that her husband’s past actions had turned her into a bit of a slut. Prior to getting married, she’d only been with one other lover. Then she met Rashad and she assumed he’d be the last man she’d ever be with. But these days, Kiara boldly explored her sexuality. Now that she was in her mid-thirties, she felt like she was at her peak. She and Eddy did it so many times the past month that she’d lost count.
After they both climaxed, they continued to enjoy each other. All that weekend they went shopping, ate at cozy restaurants, and explored each other’s bodies. It almost felt like a honeymoon.
By the time Sunday morning rolled around, Kiara knew she needed to return to her own house and take care of some legal business. Eddy was spoiling her and she loved it, but there was another part of her life that had to be dealt with—alone. She had gathered all her belongings and had just settled into her vehicle and was getting ready to back out of his garage. But before she did, she waved him over to her car.
He leaned in and kissed her on the lips.
“My weekend was great, Eddy. But you wore me out.”
“Good! And you’re welcome.”
She laughed. He kissed her again.
“I enjoyed being with you, too, Kiara. We felt like a family. We are family.”
She pondered his words. Kiara cared deeply about him, and as much as she didn’t want to be hurt by any man again, she really didn’t want to hurt Eddison, either. She was always told a man should love a woman more than she loves him, but did that mean that he’d end up disappointed at some point?
“Eddy, I love the way that you love me . . . but again, what if this baby that I’m carrying isn’t yours? I-I couldn’t bear what would happen if you give me this wonderful type of attention just to find out things haven’t turned out like you want . . . I want to make sure that you get everything you want, too.”
And just that quick Kiara went from feeling warm and happy to tense and emotional. Her eyes blinked back tears and she thought she was about to have a panic attack.
“It’s all right, my love. Try not to worry about it. We will cross that bridge when we get to it. But no matter what happens, I will always think of that child that you’re carrying as my own.”
“But what if it isn’t? What if DNA proves otherwise?”
“Do you plan to stay with him . . . if the kid is his?”
“No. No way. That’s not happening.”
“Then it’s settled. I can be that child’s father. We can be together. And you will never have to worry about me not treating you well. You’re my lady now, Kiara.”
“Okay then,” she whispered. “I’m your lady.”
She waved at him and drove off in a daze.
Love could be beautiful but wasn’t it also risky and unpredictable? Yet Kiara needed love. She told herself not to be afraid, and to get to know Eddy on an even deeper level; because in spite of her reservations, she could picture herself falling deeply for him. And if that happened, she would have to conquer her demons and claim him as hers before another woman did; for she definitely didn’t want him to be the one that got away.
Chapter 4
Coming with the Territory
All Thanksgiving weekend, while Kiara hung out with Eddison, Nicole Greene was determined to bond with Myles.
When Kiara first banned Rashad from their house, he stayed at the Hampton Inn for a couple of weeks. It cost over two grand, and even with a forty-two-inch flat screen and free wifi, his room felt lonely, freezing cold, and sterile, and he wanted to punch holes in the walls. So when Nicole told him he was crazy for staying at a motel and assured him that she’d cook his meals, wash his clothes, and save him
a lot of money, he quickly took her up on her offer.
Rashad was now shacking with Nicole in her rented house on the west side of Houston. It felt good for her to wake up with her future baby daddy in her bed, something she planned to experience permanently. And early on Black Friday, instead of shopping at the mall, Nicole had spent hours cleaning the entire house until it was spotless.
Mid-morning, when the little boy arrived with his dad and stepped inside the corridor of Nicole’s home, she graciously welcomed him as if he were the Prince of Wales.
“Well, hello there with your little handsome self.” She warmly greeted him and practically curtsied. Myles gave her a curious stare then strutted into the house, eyeballing everything.
Nicole followed him and anxiously held her breath. It would be his first time staying overnight with her and Rashad and she wanted everything to go well.
When Myles had been shown to his room and began to unpack his overnight bag, Nicole wrung her hands and could barely keep still. She already knew Myles was very observant and outspoken. Even though she was the adult, she felt she had to be on her best behavior.
“How’s it going, Myles? I hope you like the room you’re staying in,” she said to butter him up.
“I’m good.” He tossed his clothes on the bed. “I’m sure I’ll like it.”
“Okay then. If you need anything, be sure to ask me or your father.”
“I know that already.”
“All righty then.” She grinned so hard her cheeks hurt. Myles abruptly raced from the bedroom and went to look for his father, who had carried into the house a kids’ plate meal from Steak ’n Shake.
“Take your shoes off please,” Nicole called after Myles, but she wasn’t sure he heard her.
“In time,” she assured herself. “This fairy-tale type of shit takes time.”
A couple hours later, Myles screamed that he was hungry again. Nicole was about to remove the half-eaten turkey and a container of dressing from the refrigerator. But Rashad informed her that he was sick of holiday leftovers. She dropped everything she was doing and rushed out the door on a fresh grocery run. She returned home and made Myles a grilled cheese sandwich to tide him over. Then she baked some chicken and prepared fresh cauliflower and broccoli and wild rice.
