by Jo Watson
“I said we are going to be late, Rookie—pay attention. Happy birthday and best regards for a great year, and please make sure that if you ever tell my mother about the evening we met, you mention that I later returned with a gift for the birthday girl.” My face flushes as he hands the box to me and I chuckle, feeling the tightness that has been constricting my heart all day begin to loosen.
“Jackson, you didn’t have to do this.” I place my hand across my heart and do my best Scarlett O’Hara impression. “But I will be sure to remember—if the moment ever presents itself—to speak very highly of your manners to your wonderful mother.”
“Thanks, Rookie, I knew I could count on you to hide my indiscretions. Now hurry up and open that. I am sort of a guest of honor and the coaches get a little pissy if I am not there to represent.” I unwrap the box and pull out a T-shirt with our team logo on it and a large number printed on the back.
“Let me guess, Mr. Quarterback—this is your number?” I hold the back of the T-shirt up for him to see and he smiles from ear to ear.
“Geez, you are breaking my heart. You might be the only girl on campus who doesn’t already know that.” He winks and then turns around and faces the wall.
“What are you doing?” I ask.
He twists his head slightly in my direction and places his hands on his hips. “I am turning around so you can put it on, but if you would like me to see I can turn back…”
“Not a chance. Eyes to the wall.” I have never done this before. The excitement of changing in a room with Jackson races through me and it feels like hope and happiness all wrapped in warmth. I pull off the shirt I was wearing and quickly put the new one over my head. I have it to the bottom of my breasts when Jackson turns around.
“Hey, I wasn’t finished!”
“That was the idea,” he whispers loudly. I throw my old shirt at him and he bats it away. “Let’s go, beautiful, the team’s waiting.”
I follow him out of my room and steal a glance at Abby and Kyle as they watch us in silent awe. When I turn to close the door behind me I see Abby mouth, “OMG,” to me and catch the way that Kyle nods his head in Jackson’s direction. I hadn’t realized they know each other. Jackson grabs my hand and leads me to his truck. I know it’s cliché, but I feel waves of electricity run up my arm and I bite hard on my lips to keep from grinning. I can’t believe this is happening and I want to stop for a minute to process everything I feel, but Jackson tugs at my hand.
His truck is higher up than I am used to, and it requires a step for me to get in. He opens the door and then turns me to face him. When I look up into his eyes he smiles down at me, and I know he is enjoying this as much as I am. He firmly grips my hips, causing heat to pool in all the right places, and he lifts my body into the truck as if I weigh nothing.
“What a gentleman,” I say as he reaches to close my door. He laughs out loud as he walks around to the driver’s side. He slides into his seat and fires up the engine, the headlights glowing through the darkness that surrounds us. “Where are we going, Jackson?”
“I can’t allow a fellow senior to graduate without attending at least one pep rally. Come on, Rookie, let me show you some southern hospitality.” I feel like a kid at Christmas. I am giddy with excitement as his truck pulls into the school’s parking lot. Jackson rolls down our windows so he can wave at what I am guessing are fellow players and a few fans. I feel like I am finally experiencing something other college kids have known about all along, as if now I am part of the club, too.
“Don’t you dare open that door, Maddy, I am coming around to let you out.” When Jackson opens the door I look down at him from my seat. I study the way his jaw is chiseled and his biceps are firm as he reaches up to grab my waist. I am not going to lie; the thought of jumping out and throwing myself into his arms crosses my mind, but if he can show some manners then so can I. Jackson’s hands guide me to the edge of the seat and then he slowly lowers me down his body until my feet hit the asphalt below. My ankle is still sore but I can walk a short distance.
Students are descending upon us in large masses with coolers and school memorabilia. Jackson grabs my hand and pulls me along through the crowd. I don’t understand how this can all be happening so fast, and yet as I watch him maneuvering through the crowd in front of me I see it in slow motion. The way he checks behind himself every few minutes and smiles when he sees my face makes me giggle. I’m not going anywhere without him and I don’t know how he can’t see that written across my face. Maybe he can, and that is why he smiles.
There is a large stage set up in front of the crowd and the cheerleaders are dancing to music as a highlight reel is played on large screens set up on the corners of the stage. Jackson pulls me to the front of the stage and then positions me in front of him. His hands rest on my waist as he pulls my body back to rest against his.
He leans down and whispers in my ear, “See what you’ve been missing, Rookie?” I want so badly to tell him that he has no idea. I have been missing the school camaraderie, the excitement of the games and the typical college experience. What Jackson doesn’t know is that I have also been missing the excitement of being with someone I find very attractive, and the feeling of being completely enchanted when standing so close to him.
As the highlights play on and the excitement of the crowd grows, we stand pressed into each other, hearts racing with the thrill of each aspect of tonight. Jackson moves his hands from my waist and slips them across my stomach in a loose embrace, and then rests his chin my shoulder.
“I love pep rallies,” he says. “I look forward to them because they pump me up for the game. I like to be here when they bring the cheerleaders out and I like to stay until they start closing down the stage. But right now, I just want to be with you. I want to take you away from here and have you all to myself again like up on the roof. I don’t know what is going on with your boyfriend, since you came here with me, but just know that I am a competitive guy. I go after what I want, Maddy, and I haven’t wanted anything as badly as I want you in a long time.”
I close my eyes and lean back into him. I reach down, put my hands over his and return the embrace. Want and need are winding their way through my body and desire is burning my core. I want Jackson—to feel his body pressed against mine and to taste his lips again. I turn my head back to the side so our faces are close and I can feel the heat of his breath against my lips.
“Thank you for this, Jackson—” But I can’t finish, because he crushes his lips to mine and I reach one hand up to touch his face. The world around us goes black as I feel his hands pull me back against his hard body. The crowd begins to move, and we break apart as people rush past us to where the rival’s mascot has been placed atop a large pile of wood.
“Come here, Rookie, you’ve got to see this!” Jackson takes my hand as the coach lights the wood on fire. Everyone is screaming and cheering as the mascot goes up in a blaze of flames. Jackson is high-fiving people left and right and I can see that we are now surrounded by other team members in shirts like Jackson’s with girls by their sides. Jackson pulls me closer, then wraps an arm around my shoulder. He introduces me to some of the players and their girlfriends, and the crowd begins to disperse with rumblings of other parties making their way from person to person.
Jackson’s warmth envelops me as I stay pressed to his side while he talks with his teammates. I can see the other girls looking at me and whispering to each other. I have no idea what I have gotten myself into, but tonight I don’t care. I do not want this night to end. When the coaches yell to the players to go home and get some rest, the final packs of students move toward the parking lot. Jackson and I are one of the last couples to walk out to the dark lot and when we reach the edge of the grass he stops and turns me to look at him.
“Climb on, Rookie, I’ll give you a ride to the car. I know your ankle has to be sore out here.” I nod and jump onto his back when he squats down. My legs are wrapped around him and I rest my head on his
back. I feel at peace for the first time in a long time and I pray that I am going to be able to use these three weeks wisely. When we get to the truck I slide down and he helps me up into the passenger seat. After climbing in on his side, he starts the car and then rests his hand on my knee.
The tension builds as we ride home in silence, with his warm hand sliding up my thigh ever so slightly as he navigates the streets to my place.
“Jackson, do you have a girlfriend or someone that wouldn’t be very happy about this?” I can’t help it. I need to know if I am going to cause some other woman heartbreak or if he is free to be with me. I hold my breath as he turns toward me to answer.
“I haven’t been with her since the night I met you, Rookie. It wasn’t a committed relationship or anything, but we have been hooking up for about six months. I am going to be honest—I met up with her earlier this week. I had been obsessing over our night, wanting to be with you and knowing I couldn’t have you. So I called her to see if I just needed something she could provide. We started messing around, but I just couldn’t get into it. I came clean and told her I was interested in someone else.”
I am relieved that he is single, but nervous now that I know for sure what he wants from me. He squeezes my thigh.
“No pressure, Maddy—breathe. I just want to be straight with you so that you don’t find out later from other people and hate me. What about you? Why was it so easy to convince you to go out with me tonight? I thought you had a boyfriend.”
“We decided to take a break. He’s away for three weeks and then we’re going to try to figure out where we stand when he gets back. I need to think some things through for myself, and he thinks I can do it best without him.” I want to be honest, too. I don’t know how to do the dating or hooking-up thing and I feel like I am going to have to follow Jackson’s lead.
“He let you go? Just like that?” Jackson shakes his head and looks out the window. “I couldn’t have done it.” We pull into the parking lot of my building and he jumps out to open my door. Jackson holds my hand as he walks me up to my front door. When we get there I suddenly feel nervous again, and I am not sure what to do next.
“Would you like to come in for a while?” My voice is so timid I almost don’t recognize it.
“I would regret it forever if I turned that down, Rookie. I would love to extend this evening.” I open the door and he follows me into the apartment. It is dark and empty. There is a note on the counter in the kitchen that Abby has left, telling me she is spending the night at Kyle’s and to be ready to spill my guts when she gets home. I laugh and then put the note in my pocket so Jackson doesn’t see it.
“So, what’s on the list for these next three weeks, Rookie?” Jackson comes around the counter so we are standing toe-to-toe in the kitchen. I don’t know the answer to that yet. I just want to feel free, like I have lived my life. I bite my lip and shake my head, putting my hands in my back pockets.
“I haven’t thought about it.” I answer. “I’ve wanted this for so long but it’s never really been a possibility, so I haven’t planned it out. You helped me experience a few things tonight that I would have put on the list.”
“Hmm, what were those?” Jackson places his hands on my hips and pulls my body up against his so I can feel every inch of him against me.
“I’ve never been to a pep rally…” He brushes his nose against mine and I think he is going to kiss me, but he just smiles and mumbles a go-on sound, “…and I have never wanted someone to touch me as badly as I want you to.” It is a whisper and I close my eyes as his lips meet mine. It is slow and soft as we discover each other again, but then he puts his hands on the side of my face and deepens the kiss, sliding his tongue into my mouth.
Our bodies are colliding under the movement of the kiss and he backs me up to the counter and presses himself against me. Our mouths leave each other for a minute as we rest our foreheads together and gasp for air. I am so turned on that my cheeks are flushed with heat and my body is tingling with awareness. In one fast movement Jackson lifts me onto the edge of the counter. He is looking at where his hands have met my body as he slowly slides them up to my ribs and then lightly cups the outsides of my breasts before returning his gaze to mine.
I press my body into his hands, giving him permission to take this further. He sucks in my bottom lip and then lightly bites it as he caresses my breasts with his warm hands. I put my hands on the sides of his face, wanting to feel the roughness of his jaw under my touch. His hands drift down to my backside and he pulls me closer to him so that I can feel his need between my legs. There is a feeling building and building inside me from the contact our bodies are making as he holds me tightly against him.
There is the sound of a key in the lock, and I jump down from the counter and tuck Jackson behind me. Abby bursts through the door, her face puffy from crying, and she stops short as she sees us standing in the kitchen.
“Oh, no, I’m sorry,” she says in a panic, as she takes in the scene.
“It’s all right, Abby—are you okay?”
Abby starts to cry again and shakes her head no. She throws her purse on the counter and then makes her way to the tissues in the living room. I turn around to Jackson who has such a guilty look on his face it makes me laugh, and I hit his arm playfully and then give him a hug.
“I’m sorry, Jackson, but I have to take care of her.” He nods his head and moves toward the front door.
“I’ll see you tomorrow, Rookie,” he says, and then lightly kisses my forehead.
“I have to visit family tomorrow.” I am disappointed that we won’t have a chance to let this thing play out. Jackson steps out onto the front step and then turns around so he is facing me again.
“Well, I guess it’s a good thing that a day is made up of twenty-four hours. There is no way your family can take them all.” He reaches into my back pocket and pulls out my cell phone. He types in a few things and I am suddenly very glad I have never protected my phone with a password. His cell chimes with a message notification, and he slides my phone back into my pocket.
“I will tell you what else I know, Maddy.” He leans in close and presses his warm lips to my neck, trailing kisses from my shoulder to just under my ear. I shiver. “I now have your number, and three weeks to make you realize how great we could be together.” Jackson kisses my lips and then goes down the steps, putting space between us.
“I’ll see you tomorrow, Rookie.”
“I’ll see you tomorrow, Jackson.”
Chapter Five
Aunt Gwen looks beautiful as usual. She hugs me tight and has lunch set out for us at her kitchen table. It’s been awhile since I’ve seen her and it feels good to be with her again. We drink tea and eat sandwiches, catching up on each other’s lives in between bites. Aunt Gwen is retired now and lives alone since Uncle David passed a few years ago.
Aunt Gwen’s little condo is warm and cozy, with framed photos lining the walls. She asks me to follow her into her office so she can retrieve my gift, and rummages through the closet while I take in the messy piles of books on her bookshelf.
“What’s this?” I ask, my eyes catching on an old photo album.
“I think that might be pictures from my last year of high school. That would make your mom about your age. You’re welcome to look inside, if you like.”
I pull the album from the shelf and dust off the cover. When I open it up, the first picture I see shows my mother and my aunt at a party, sitting next to each other on a couch.
“It’s funny that you found this today of all days. It was taken on Isabel’s twenty-first birthday.” My aunt is looking at the picture over my shoulder. She wraps her arm around my waist and then turns the page for me. “We had a party at our parents’ house. They were out of town so lots of our friends came over.”
The next page shows a picture of my mother sitting across the lap of a handsome man with the long hair typical of that era. She is laughing and he is smiling, looking at her wit
h an admiration that looks very much like love.
“Who is that, Aunt Gwen? I don’t think I’ve ever seen him before.”
“John. Your mother dated him for about six months before she got serious with your father.”
“They look so happy. How come I’ve never heard about him?” I am shocked; I have never imagined her with anyone other than my father. She looks so in love.
“It’s not my story to tell, Madeline. I will tell you this, though: John loved her with every piece of his heart. Our parents didn’t approve of him—they wanted her with a man who could provide for her and offer her the lifestyle she was used to. John was a hard worker, but he wasn’t born into money.”
“But Uncle David didn’t come from a wealthy family either, though, did he?”
“No, he didn’t. And my parents didn’t like him any more than they liked John, but what he and I shared was more important to me than my parents’ notions of securing a good future.”
“And your parents accepted that?”
Aunt Gwen laughs sadly. “No, and they never did forgive me for my choices. But I’ve never looked back. Your uncle David loved me until the day he died. We had a very happy life together.”
I flip through the next few pages of my mother and aunt together at different events. The last photo in the album shows my mother and father on their wedding day. I have seen this photo many times in my life but now I look at it with new eyes.
As I close the album my aunt hands me a giftwrapped package and offers me a smile as she puts the album back on the shelf. We sit down on the loveseat in her office, and I open the beautifully-wrapped gift and uncover a small jewelry box with a dancing ballerina on top. It looks very old and a little worn on the hinges. My aunt sweeps her finger across the top, below the dancer’s delicate feet. “It was your mother’s, Madeline. I think she would have wanted it to be yours now.”
“It’s wonderful,” I whisper, as I open the top to find the box lined with red velvet. I twist the little knob inside but the dancer remains still. My aunt places her hand on my shoulder and kisses my cheek.
