by Tamsin Baker
Karin’s face lit up, her wide smile and beaming brown eyes beautiful to look at.
“Wonderful. Now, everyone makes their own dinner, but tonight I believe your master has sent food over from his cook. It is in the cool room labeled for you.”
A quiver of pain ran through her as sleekly as a drop of rain down a window.
“Thank you.”
Karin bowed and closed the door, leaving Amyex alone in her silent bedroom.
A numbness descended and wrapped around her, forcing her to look around and not absorb anything other than the bare facts.
The home she had been escorted to was clean and tidy. It housed over twenty former slaves Karin said, and someone would come to see her tomorrow to discuss employment as a servant if that was what she so chose.
Amyex twisted around and snuck under the covers, her eyes closing as her head pounded stronger. Her brain was being paddled like a drum, and the pain was beginning to make her stomach roll.
“I’ll just sleep for a little while.”
It was pure daylight in her room. She’d never sleep.
****
Amyex awoke to bustling noises and the chirp of the early morning birds out her window.
She sat bolt upright, her heart thundering in her chest as she searched for her dark room, the small slit in the door.
Several slow breaths calmed her breathing as everything came crashing down on her.
The Church.
Freedom.
No master.
She crept back down onto her soft mattress, pulling the blankets tightly around her.
How had she slept all night without waking? She stretched and blinked open her eyes again.
Was she actually happy here?
An impossible question.
She didn't know—happiness was not something she measured—but she felt safe. That was an important thing.
She slid out of bed and began to dress. What would she do today?
Her stomach lurched when she realized she had nowhere to be, no purpose.
Knock, knock, knock.
Amyex stepped forward and opened the door, Karin's smiling face greeting her.
“Good morning. How are you feeling this morning?”
“Lost.”
Karin giggled, the sound light and musical, giving Amyex tingles on her arms.
“That is completely normal, and I hope that feeling disappears soon.”
Amyex dropped her head and stared at the cold floor, not sure where to go next.
“I'll show you where the kitchen is so you can make yourself some breakfast, and then we can see Tareek. She will tell you of the options you have with work.”
Amyex looked up at the woman before her and nodded slowly. Karin was helping her, and although part of her was fearful of putting all her trust in one person, she hadn’t seen anything yet to make her stop.
They made their way to the small, clean kitchen, and Karin showed her where her shelf was and the enormous amount of food her old master and cook had sent over. She may have cried a little as she ate the meat that was meant for dinner last night. But Karin didn’t say anything, and she didn't need to explain.
For the next hour Amyex explored her floor, meeting three other ex-slaves and having a long soak in the hot bathtub they had. It was small, but she could curl up in it, and as she did, her body ached with the memories of her master's touch.
On the tick of nine a plump woman knocked on her door.
“Hello, Amyex, I’m Tareek, and I work for the Church. I’m here to talk to you about your employment options.”
She smiled up at the woman, who had obviously not begun her life as a slave, her full figure and manner of speaking too proud to be anything other than a free woman.
“Thank you.”
Amyex jumped to her feet, but the woman stepped into her bedroom and dropped into the small chair opposite the bed.
“We can talk here.”
This woman was odd, and as Amyex slowly curled up into a ball on the bed, she got the feeling she had misjudged her.
“We have had a request for someone with your background. The terms are six days a week, twelve hours a day, and the top pay rate we ask for, for someone of a housekeeping role.”
Amyex gulped, her body freezing.
“You mean, I’d have days off?”
The woman’s smile was kind.
“Of course. Would you like to go to the house and meet your prospective new employer?”
Amyex shook her head rapidly. She didn't want to get a choice; she didn’t need to meet anyone. She just needed something to do, and now, it seemed, the money to pay for her room and food.
“If you think I am able to do the job they need, I will start immediately.”
The woman quirked an eyebrow and ran her pink tongue over her lower lips slowly.
“All right. I will send word today to them and you can start tomorrow. The mistress of that home is actually a personal friend of mine, and I believe you will enjoy your work immensely.”
Amyex ducked her head, a cold washing over her body that made her want to sleep. Her new life had begun, and she was afraid that if she didn’t begin immediately, she may lie down and never get up again.
“What am I to do until then?”
“Do you know where the market is? Where to buy the food you need?”
“Yes.” Amyex lifted her head a fraction and looked up. Did she have to do that now?
“Well, then I suggest you use today to set up your new life. You have money from your old master, and your new employer will pay you more than enough for food and housing, so go and buy enough food for the week and several new outfits for your new life. Two changes of clothes for work, your employer will expect a higher standard of you so that her guests look at you with respect, and some clothes that you like to wear on a Sunday when you have time to yourself.”
Amyex gaped at the woman in front of her. She’d never owned more than one outfit at a time.
“I … ah … wouldn’t know where I was to buy clothes.”
“Do you know where the large stall at the market is that sells silks, on the corner?”
She nodded, seeing the stall in her memory. She’d only been to the market a few times, but it stood out amongst the food sellers.
“There is a small shop across the road called La Rec. Tell the woman at the shop you have a new housekeeping position in a home that requires a level three dress code and she will attire you correctly.”
“A level three?” Amyex croaked out, unable to believe this was happening. She liked her soft pants and top that her master had bought for her, and she missed the thin clothing of her slavery.
What would they make her wear now?
“Wonderful. I will drop by in the morning to take you to your new employer’s home. I’ll see you then.”
Tareek stood up, pushing herself out of her chair with a small grunt.
Amyex jumped to her feet, her hands shaking as she opened the door for the larger woman.
“Th-thank you.”
The woman turned to her, her smile kind as she rubbed Amyex’s hand. “I know it’s hard, but you’ll get there. I promise. The world has only just begun to show you its glories.”
And with a final rub she was gone.
Amyex fell back onto her bed and slid her hand beneath the mattress, pulling out the coins her master had given her.
She tipped them out of their cloth bag and reached over to her things and took hold of the bag her cook had given her. She weighed the coins a moment more, then slid them into the new bag.
She’d never seen so much money, and her original thought had been to hide it, save it, but if her master had given it to her so that she could set herself up in this new job, then she would do as she had been bidden.
A nod and a step and she was out the door and on the way to the market. She had clothes to buy and food to taste.
****
Too many bags. She had far too many bags.<
br />
Her chest was tight, and breathing was harder than she had ever expected it to be.
“Amyex! How was your day?”
She spun around to see Karin beaming her huge smile in the doorway.
Amyex motioned to her shopping, her throat closing up as she tried to speak. She’d bought too much, spent too much money. Why had she listened to the shopkeeper when she’d said to buy a third shirt for work? She didn’t need it.
“Oh, that’s great. You’ve bought some clothes for work. Show me what you got.”
Karin barged right into her room and sat down on the chair, her eyes going wide with expectation.
She waited a moment, then looked back at the bags.
Karin’s voice was stronger this time.
“Amyex, can you show me what you bought, please?”
She moved over to her bed and took out the clothes she’d bought, the food already put away in her designated area of the kitchen. She laid each piece out on the mattress, taking care to arrange them in the outfits she’d been told would be best.
“They’re beautiful. You’ve chosen very well, and I’m sure your new employer will be very proud.”
Amyex nodded, her throat clogging with tears as she swallowed harshly. Too many things to feel and think, she wasn’t sure which way to turn.
“You’re doing so well. Don’t give up.” Karin touched her on the arm, smiled, and left.
Amyex let the strength in her legs go, and she sank into the chair. Life was upside down and inside out. But as she stared at the new clothes draped across her bed she knew that for better or worse, there was no going back now.
****
A few days later Amyex was in a nice routine with her new work, and smiling as she walked back into her housing building.
“Amyex.”
A gasp caught in her throat as she stopped and froze to the spot.
She knew that voice … better than she knew the shape of her own fingernails.
She concentrated on her movements as she slowly twisted and faced the man in front of her.
“Master.”
She dipped her head but just stopped herself from falling to her knees before him. The need was there in the trembling of her thighs, but her conscious brain fought to keep her standing. She wasn’t his slave anymore. She was no one’s.
“It’s so good to see you. How are you doing?”
Her eyes seemed glued to the floor, unable to rise as she forced her chin up.
Callused fingertips touched her cheeks, and her gaze flew up to him, his warm blue eyes comforting in their familiarity.
“I’m working as a housekeeper.” The words emerged from her as though he’d pushed a button.
She didn’t stop to question the ease with which she spoke, just continued onwards.
“I’ve heard she’s very happy with you. Are you enjoying it?”
A slight down turn of one side of his mouth had Amyex frowning. Was her old master unhappy for some reason?
“Yes, Master … ah, I am. Mrs. Culdoen is very nice to me.”
“And your lodgings? Temporary though they are.” Her master—she had no other word for him—gestured to the building around them, the room quiet of all noise except a few slippered feet shuffling from place to place.
“It is surprisingly comfortable, and I do look forward to being able to settle into something more permanent soon.”
She had befriended one of the other ex-slaves, a woman called Fierre. She was quite fiery for one born into slavery, but she had a good heart and was encouraging a connection that Amyex found exciting. Perhaps when they had enough money put together, they would be able to lodge somewhere together.
For the first time ever she watched her master look away, clearing his throat in a strange way.
“I was wondering if you would like to come to my home tomorrow for lunch, as a guest.”
Her knees trembled as his words sank in. Come to his house? As a guest? To see him?
“I … must…” She wobbled over to a chair against a wall, her head spinning with strange white lights. “Ahh.”
Her master came to stand beside her, then crouched down onto his haunches and looked up at her.
She’d never been above her master, ever, and a part of her wanted to lie down on the ground beside him, but she stayed planted in her chair.
You’re not his slave. Don’t do it.
“Please come.”
She nodded slowly, unable to refuse him such a simple request.
Would they be able to meet as friends? She doubted it, but she was honored by his question.
“Of course I will.”
A grin spread across his face, lighting up his eyes and making warmth spread through her chest and belly.
“I’ll see you at noon.”
He stood up and cupped her cheek for a moment with his hand. Her eyes slid closed, pleasure radiating through her from that one point of contact.
Then he left.
And she collapsed.
The world hadn’t just turned inside out. It was no longer the same world she remembered.
There was only one explanation and that was that she’d died in her sleep and she was currently dreaming. No other thought in her head made sense.
And that was just fine with her.
****
The front door opened, and a small male slave stood before her, head bowed, eyes averted.
He’s got a new slave already.
“Ah, thank you.”
What else could she say to the person who had taken her role in her master’s household?
A shiver coursed over her skin, and she fell back a step. She wasn’t sure she could do it.
“Come in, please. He is waiting for you.”
The man’s voice was quiet but steady. He hadn’t been broken, and she was thankful for that.
Amyex straightened her spine and walked past the slave at the door, moving through the house she knew so well and making her way into the dining area.
Her master waited for her there, his loose shirt and good pants making her proud that she had worn the one outfit she’d bought for her days off.
It was a dress, of orange and white. It matched her hair and clung to her body, accentuating her small breasts and tiny waist.
The shop woman had practically given it to her, unwilling to let her leave the shop without it once Amyex had tried it on.
“You look spectacular.” His praise would have been too much in itself, but the roaming, hot look in his eyes made it impossible to dismiss his words.
“And you also, Master.”
He stepped closer and reached out a hand, cupping her face.
For the first time, she let herself respond to the warmth in his touch, turning her face into his palm and letting a happy purr roll through her.
“It’s Janikk.”
Her body stilled, then unfurled from its curled position.
She stared up at him.
“Pardon?”
“My name, it’s Janikk. Please call me by it. I am no longer your master, and for that I am grateful.”
Pain, like a twisting serpent, curled around her heart and squeezed.
“You are glad you are no longer my master?”
Tears welled and gathered in her eyes. She couldn’t stop them and chose not to.
He chuckled softly, reaching up to wipe away the moisture on her cheeks. “You will understand soon enough. Sit with me and eat.”
She allowed herself to be led over to the table and dutifully ate the food the cook placed in front of her.
Her eyes strayed to the door that led to the central area of the house, where her room probably still sat. Was it empty, or did the new servant sleep there, enjoying the warmth and the dark as she had for so many years?
“Does your new slave sleep in my old bedroom?”
Her master—Janikk—looked up from his meat and bread and shook his head. “No, he prefers the small bedroom next to the second bathroom.”
The one he’d urged her for years to use, but she hadn’t been able to leave the comfort of her dark room.
How things had changed.
“He seems happy.”
Janikk nodded, his eyes lighting up with the implied compliment.
“I believe so, but it is still very early days.”
They finished their food, the cook bringing out a dessert of cream and milky custard.
“She remembered how much I enjoyed the custard the one time I tried it.”
Janikk reached over and touched her hand, his fingers curling over Amyex’s and squeezing gently.
“None of us have forgotten anything, and we miss you a lot.”
“We?” She managed to ask, then dropped her head, unable to maintain eye contact for too long.
“Me, the cook, but more specifically me.”
The question she'd been ignoring since she'd left burned in her throat.
“Then why did you give me away?”
“Look at me, Amyex."
Pulling her gaze up to his was hard. Like dragging a huge sack of rice up ten flights of stairs. Her neck ached, and her heart thumped louder and heavier.
His eyes burned like a night storm, and heat twisted in her belly.
“I never wanted to give you away. I wanted you to have the choice on what sort of life you had. As my slave you had no choice, and I couldn’t live with that.”
“What sort of decisions did I need? I lived in a home I loved with a man I…”
She stopped, her throat closing up as she realized what she was about to say.
“A man you what, Amyex? Tell me.”
His voice was hard, the tone one she couldn’t ignore.
“Wanted, but couldn’t have.”
A growl emanated from his chest, and he pushed back his chair, grabbed her and pulled her up into his arms.
Amyex slammed against his huge chest, air capturing in her lungs as his eyes stared down at her.
“I want you, I always have. But the choice had to be yours. You have a good job. You have a home. Do you still want me?”
Of course I do. It was never about being beholden to you.
“Yes. Yes. Yes. Always.”
His lips crashed down on hers, heat burning through her body like a match striking flint.
She groaned aloud, sucking on his tongue as he thrust it into his mouth.
He broke off from her lips, his hands moving up to her face, cupping her jaw roughly.
