Lila stared at her hand, both shocked an annoyed that he’d waited until now to do whatever he’d just done to free her. Breathing deep, she lifted her wrist and rotated it, staring at the gold chain that dangled down from her fingers.
She remembered the day he’d started wearing it well.
He’d been sixteen at the time. She’d been twenty-six.
She was free, but even as she studied her freed hand, she couldn’t make herself fly away. Not even when he burned the skin under her top with his fingertips, or when his breath warmed her ear.
“I couldn’t fight for you back then,” he whispered. “But I’m not a kid anymore, Lila, and he can’t have you this time.”
Lila jammed her eyes shut.
“I’ll kill him first.”
7
Lila looked at her bedside clock, saw the time, and scoffed.
It was the middle of the night, and she was fighting a war she’d already lost. The covers on her bed were too hot, but when she kicked them off, the air in the room was too cold.
Her body was speaking to her in a way she was familiar with, but she didn’t have the courage to address it in the way she knew it needed.
It terrified her what it would mean if she did.
She tossed and turned for what felt like hours, but when she looked at the clock, she saw it had only been three minutes.
Apparently, her body wasn’t going to allow her to get any rest until she gave in to everything that was plaguing her, regardless of what it meant.
Writhing under her sheets, she kicked them, and the blanket, off the bed completely, with an animalistic growl.
She knew what she needed. The only thing in the world that would get her to sleep.
So she looked at the clock one more time, saw that it was nearly 3am, and finally succumbed, letting her fingers slip past the waistband of her panties.
The moment they dove into her slick, velvety walls, her eyes fluttered shut, and they didn’t open again until her alarm went off the next morning.
Not even as an orgasm stronger than any she’d ever had rocked every bone in her body.
Not even as his face infiltrated her mind and stayed there for good.
--
“It’s come to my attention that you hosted a party at your place of residence last night.”
Lila shifted in the large leather seat, noting that it was surprisingly comfortable, not to mention breathtakingly beautiful and expensive. As she took in the vaulted ceilings, endless bookshelves, and beautiful bay windows of the dean’s office, however, she noted that everything in that room was beautiful.
Including the woman sitting on the other side of the desk.
Lila tucked a piece of hair behind her ear as she nodded to Dr. Halle Perkins, Dean of Students. Dean Perkins was in her fifties, and her skin was the darkest brown, downplayed only by her jet-black hair, which she kept in a sharp bob. Her brown eyes were serious, the perfect compliment to her borderline stoic personality.
“I did,” Lila said. “It was small. I’m not usually one for parties, but I recently purchased a beautiful house in Davis Square, and I just had to show it off.”
Dean Perkins sat forward.
Lila felt uneasy by the look in her eyes.
“Lila, I’m short on time today, so I’ll get straight to the point. Fraternizing with students isn’t forbidden at Harvard, but it can be frowned upon. It has too much potential to create conflicts of interest, and can open a lot of negative doors that you might find hard to close. I’m aware you’ve only been working here for a little under a year. Seeing as your performance review is coming up soon, I thought it only fair to give you the heads up I wish someone had given me when I started as a lecturer here twenty years ago.”
“I had no idea. I--” Lila was stunned. “There were students and faculty at the party. There wasn’t even any alcohol. Anyone who was drunk at my party was only drunk because they arrived that way.” She thought of the sorority girl who’d stumbled in on Chase’s arm and stumbled out in quite the same fashion. As far as Lila could remember, she was the only person at the party who’d been visibly drunk. “We played Kenny G all night for goodness sake.”
“I have no doubt nothing unsavory occurred. I’m sure it was a lovely party. Even so. You are young, beautiful, brilliant, and black. People will hate you for it. You’re up for assistant professor very soon…”
Lila’s eyes searched Dean Perkins’, and it hit her what this was really about. The Dean hadn’t brought Lila in to chide her. As a fellow black woman in academia, she’d brought Lila in to warn her.
“They’ll be gunning for you.” Dean Perkins gave her the first smile of the morning. “Try not to give them too much ammo.”
--
“Do you have a question, Mr. Almeida?”
Chase hesitated a few feet away from Lila’s desk, a smirk touching his lips as the last of the class filed out of the auditorium. A frozen moment passed as if he were giving himself a silent chant, before he began moving toward her again. By the time he made it to her desk, tapping his fingers against the wood, the classroom was empty.
“No, Professor James.” He still said those two words, Professor James, like he was telling an inside joke that she wasn’t in on, with a teasing tone of voice that annoyed her. “I just wanted to say good morning.”
“Good morning,” Lila said. “Is that all?”
His eyebrows jumped.
“Because I have a very busy day today. I don’t have much time.”
He exhaled. “So that’s how it’s going to be, Professor?” His eyes bore into hers. “Really?”
“Yes. Really.” Lila crossed her arms. “Anything else?”
He stepped away from the desk, eyes wounded. “Nah. That’s all. Just wanted to say hi.”
“Then I’ll see you tomorrow in class.” Lila shifted.
She hated being so cold to him, but the talk with the dean that morning was stuck in her mind. She’d warned Lila that inviting her students to an innocent party might put her assistant professor promotion at risk. Lila could only imagine the kind of colorful warnings Dean Perkins would have for her if she knew that, by the end of the night, one of those students had bent Lila over her kitchen sink.
Some part of her wanted to hop over that desk and give him a hug. The hurt he tried to hide from his eyes nearly made it so. Another part of her, the darker, more monstrous part, wanted to hop over that desk and continue exploring what they’d started in her kitchen. Thankfully, she was able to fight back the urge to protect him, the vivid memory of his hard dick pressed against her, and the immediate response her body had to both.
Her victory was short-lived, because the lurid thoughts didn’t stay gone for long. Just like it had been while she’d tossed and turned in bed the night before, the feeling of his body flush with hers was back in her head like a drug. It had yet to leave her mind for more than a few seconds at a time.
The memory clearly hadn’t left Chase’s mind, either. Something had shifted with him, with both of them, and now they were treading the kind of rocky ground they’d never tread with each other. A week ago he would’ve had a smile, a pun, or some smart remark in response to Lila’s short attitude.
Today, he ran a hand down the back of his head, and slowly backed away from her desk. “All right. Have a good day, then.”
“You too, Chase.”
She waited for him to leave the room, shooting her one last look from the top of the auditorium before he stepped out for good. Only then did she allow herself to fall into her chair and slam her forehead against the desk.
Last night had been a mistake. For more reasons than she had fingers to count.
He was her student.
He was ten years her junior.
He was her ex-boyfriend’s baby brother.
Last night had certainly been a mistake. Not just the party, but everything after.
It was a mistake Lila vowed never to make again.
Her caree
r was on the line. It was the job of her dreams. If she wanted to insure it remained safely in her grasp, she had to let go of the one thing in the world she’d never learned to let go of.
She had to let go of Chase Almeida.
--
As the sun came and went, Chase looked at the homework that sat piled on the desk next to his bed. Most of it was due in the morning. He knew he could knock it out with his eyes closed, but he couldn’t make himself move.
Lying in the middle of the bed with his hands behind his head, staring at the ceiling, seemed much more desirable.
As was often the case, he couldn’t get Lila James out of his head.
At the moment, she’d pissed him off to the high heavens. His deep desire for her, the desire that had been tearing him slowly to pieces, limb by agonizing limb, had been easier to fight when he was a kid. Back when he was thirteen, he’d known he didn’t stand a chance with her. They’d both known. They’d both known that, no matter how many nights he spent dreaming about her, no matter what he said or what he did, he would never have her.
Things were different now.
For the first time in his life, Chase could feel it happening. He could feel Lila changing. He could feel that the war, the war that had been waged in his heart from the first moment he’d laid eyes on her, was finally close to being won.
He’d had her bent over her sink with his dick in the folds of her ass. It had felt unbelievable. Not just physically, but in the most volatile parts of him. The parts that had always belonged to her.
For the first time in his life, he knew he could have her, and knowing that was going to kill him ten times faster than her unrequited love ever could’ve.
Now, when she fought him, pulled away, and told him no, it was more frustrating than it had ever been when he was thirteen, because now he knew she was fighting in vain.
It didn’t help that his brother was in town, fucking with her head even more. Jack always had terrible timing, and now was no exception. He’d walked back into Lila’s life at the worst possible moment.
Chase understood that he no longer had the luxury of waiting Lila out. Waiting for her love to come softly. For her to wake the hell up. No, he would have to wake her up himself.
He’d told her he would kill Jack before seeing him have her again, and he’d meant it with every fiber of his being.
He sighed, fingers moving slowly over his throbbing dick, sticky with the desire dripping from its pulsating tip. His free hand cupped his aching balls, prompting a strangled moan, and he tried to push the anger away, to stop picturing her face. It astounded him that, even then, he was still hard for her. Harder for her, in fact, than he was when he was happy with her.
He swallowed the moisture that had pooled in his throat, taking himself under a firm grip and tugging fast. He wasn’t trying to take his time to the thought of her. Not tonight.
He was too pissed off.
If she wanted to play hardball, he’d give her the match of her life.
He’d let her feel what it was like without him. She’d never felt it before, because he’d never allowed her to. Those days were done. He knew it was now or never.
Lila had to lose him to realize how badly she needed him. Once she did, she’d never let it happen again.
When a knock came through his bedroom door, he hadn’t finished, but he was thankful. Maybe his roommate had something planned for tonight, something that involved copious amounts of alcohol. Something that involved not beating his meat to a woman who seemed determined to never have him in the way he ached to be had.
Chase needed to get out. He needed to forget.
Sitting up in his bed, he tucked himself away, hiding his erection by bending his knees under the sheets.
“Come in,” he said, straightening up.
Instead of Ronnie, Julie came charging in, eyes lowered.
Chase flew out of the bed.
The last time he’d seen Julie was when she’d stormed out after he’d accidentally said Lila’s name. He almost laughed. Just one more thing to add to the million and one ways Professor James had completely taken over his life, and his psyche.
“Yo, Jules. You look nice today.” He was genuinely happy to see Julie. She was always an easy diversion. Maybe she’d even let him hit. He needed the release.
He smiled, watching as she turned away from him to close his bedroom door behind her.
“It’s good to see you…” His words dragged off when Julie turned back to him and met his eyes.
The whites of her brown eyes were fire engine red.
His smile vanished. “What’s the matter?”
She breathed deep once, twice, three times.
Finally, she spoke. “They raped me.”
He visibly jolted. He didn’t know what he’d been expecting her to say, but that sure as hell hadn’t been it.
“What?” He cringed. “Who?”
Julie’s body trembled from head to toe. “I said no, but...” Her cries intensified when he wrapped her in his arms, upgrading to full on sobs. “I wasn’t going to say anything, but--I can’t sleep.”
Chase’s body shook with hers as she cried. “When did this happen?”
Her eyes rose to his from under the lids, tears soaking his chest. “The day you said that girls name while we were in bed. Lila.” She said the name with distain before her face collapsed into tears once more.
“Stop… Hey.” He softly pushed her away. “Listen to me. Breathe. Take a minute.” He gave her that minute and then pressed on. “We’re leaving.”
“I don’t want to leave.”
“We’re leaving.”
“Where are we going?”
“I know someone who can help you.”
“I don’t want any help.”
“She can help you with that too. Move your ass.” He snatched open the door to his room and watched impatiently as she shuffled forward. He followed her out and nodded his greeting to Ronnie, sitting on the couch as they passed him in the living room.
“Hey…” Ronnie called, his eyes falling helplessly to the ass of Julie’s jeans as she and Chase walked hurriedly out of the apartment. “Where’s the fire?” he grumbled, just before the front door slammed closed behind them.
--
He was a live wire.
That was what Chase had become to Lila. With each day that passed, she could feel the deadly current on the rise between them, intensifying with each moment they allowed their gazes to lock for a bit too long, their bodies to move a bit too close, and their hearts to manifest the affection in their eyes a bit too strongly.
Spurs of flashing light flew out of control from the tip of that live wire, cautioning the deadly dangers of getting too close, the fatal risk of indulging herself in even a single touch. One touch would be one too many. One touch was all it would take.
It would slaughter her effortlessly, completely, and within seconds. It would happen so fast she wouldn’t even have a moment to react.
Lila knew not to get twisted up with that live wire. She knew, but her curiosity was rapidly overriding her common sense.
It was also doing a serious number on her concentration skills.
She scrolled absently through her manuscript. She’d hoped giving it another read-through would help her office hours go by faster. Two hours and not a single student had come knocking. She was now regretting pulling out her manuscript, at all, because she hated every new word that hit her eyes. How could she expect to be promoted to assistant professor when she couldn’t even stomach reading her own words? Kelly Hannigan was drowning in books, and Lila couldn’t even finish her second.
She felt like her life was falling to pieces. Writing had always been something that came easy to her, but it was also like an extension of her heart. When her heart hurt, she couldn’t see the beauty in anything, especially not her writing.
At the moment, her heart was in shambles.
She regretted treating Chase badly. She just couldn’t s
ee any other way.
When a knock rang out on her office door, followed by the knob turning, Lila shot up out of her chair. Finally, a student was here, and she had an excuse to pretend her manuscript didn’t exist, to forget about her life, even if only for a few minutes.
The student stepped through the door and met her eyes. Her stomach exploded with butterflies. That live wire exploded, too, officially activated, spitting deadly sparks at a rate beyond comprehension.
“Chase,” she whispered, moving around her desk as he closed the door behind him. “Hi.”
He leaned against the door, holding her eyes. “Professor.”
A long moment of silence passed, but their gazes remained locked.
Lila was the first to break. “Chase, I know what happened in the kitchen has you feeling upset. Confused. I feel the same way, but you have to know that it can never happen again. That’s why I was so short with you yesterday. I have to be. I’m a teacher; you’re my student. Not to mention that I’ve been in a relationship with your brother--”
His eyes closed. “As much as I hate every word coming out of your mouth right now…” He opened his eyes. “That’s not why I’m here.”
“Okay. Why are you here?”
He moved away from the door and pulled it open, waving somebody in.
A girl Lila recognized as one of the many blondes in her Human Sexuality class came sulking in, and Lila fixed her face, standing taller. She recognized the girl instantly, only because she’d seen this girl shooting looks of venom Chase’s way during every one of her lectures. Lila thought the two of them must know each other, and were possibly even having sex. In fact, she was sure they’d had sex. No woman looked at a man with so much rage as this one did Chase if there wasn’t something sexual going on at the core.
Lila tried to remember her name, and then it hit her.
Julie.
Thunder Rolls (The Almeida Brothers Trilogy Book 2) Page 9
